Reddit Story #aita #askreddit #redditstories #shorts
Channel: SemiSeriousRedditStories
Date: 2024-01-20

Reddit Story #aita #reddit #redditstories #viral 

AITA for being a “deadbeat” parent to my older son?

Some background - my ex had been fighting for custody since 2020 and is still going. He finally managed to get my older son living with him and because the courts kept my younger son with me we now only see the other child every other weekend so the boys can spend weekends together. I filed for child support but because we make around the same, it was set at 0 with us splitting medical costs and him covering insurance.

So before when both kids lived with me primarily I paid for everything for them - medical, extracurriculars, etc. my ex paid my rent and phone bill and paid for stuff for the kids separate from me. He however decided he didn’t owe any support anymore when the custody became 50/50 even though its his job as a father to support his family.

Now that my older son is with him he constantly hounds me for money that I can’t afford because I work part time now and have a baby with my new partner to take care of. I also pay for my younger son (clothes, food, haircuts, school supplies, doctors visits) and never ask him for anything for him. He feels that because he still pays on his own decision for clothing and shoes for my younger son that I am a “deadbeat” for not providing for my older son (I do still pay for half my older son’s braces which is like 100/month and for birthday/xmas gifts and got him a backpack for school).

Some things my ex keeps asking for:

half of my son’s contact lens fees

half of copays for medical procedures

money for his extracurriculars which are OPTIONAL and cost way too much

half of school field trip fees

I keep telling him I don’t have the money and now he is heavily implying I don’t care about my older son and that my older son is way more expensive than my younger son so me not contributing to his expenses is basically “deadbeat” status. The most hurtful thing he has said is that my kids stepmom provides more for my older son than I do because I won’t “step up” which is terrible and unfair because she makes way more money as it is.

So am I wrong for refusing?