Insecure Attachment Styles (YOU as Dead Mother) in Narcissists, Borderlines, Psychopaths
Channel: Prof. Sam Vaknin
Date: 2020-08-14

Insecure attachment styles, attachment disorders and dysfunction are prevalent in cluster B personalities (narcissists, psychopaths, borderlines, histrionics). 

In early childhood, they all loved a dead mother, but they do not dare to think about it or verbalize it (the unthought known). Instead they resort to emotional thinking.

They cathect (emotionally invest in) death and aggression (destrudo, not libido), including in inanimate material goods. 

Owing to hurt-aversion, they place a premium on self-sufficiency, 
independence, personal autonomy, and unbridled, antisocial self-efficacy. They frequently self-parentify and are auto-erotic.

They can love only a dead mother, so they try to turn you into one. Killing the mother figure in order to be able to love her (snapshotting, merger/fusion, extension). 

They have dead inert non-interacting mute introjects which makes it difficult for them to distinguish internal from external objects.

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