Happy Birthday Thomas! · From all your Fans, Enemies and Socks!
Channel: Samizdat
Date: 31/05/2020

We did not get you taken back into custody before your probation expires on 6-6, but we put together a hell of a birthday trifecta for you--as promised. 

* Served in dual lawsuits, Hoffman v. Schoenberger and Bogaerts v. Schoenberger. 
Served a Temporary Protective Order (TPO) on behalf of Manuel Chavez III. 

* * Flipped Z3301 Richard Miller after he finally got tired of you manipulating him and abusing his reputation for your stupid Kappy KeyBase DeadMan's Switch LARP. 

* * * Flipped Julianne Burke, aka "Elizabeth Vering," who betrayed you to your mortal enemy, Hoffman, and kept you on the phone while a process server walked right up onto you on the balcony outside Apartment 1726. 

I promised you a birthday trifecta. That came together a little bit differently than I envisioned, but I will take it. 

You now have a limited number of days to respond to Hoffman's lawsuit. I have it on good authority that he will be submitting an Amended Complaint. We cannot wait to see what form that will take. 

You see, you rotund dumbass, nobody wanted anything more than to see you subjected to a legal process. Our legal system is far from perfect, but it is what we have. I guarantee that you would rather be subjected to this legal system than to vigilante justice. 

You should be feeling very, very alone. Your meal ticket just evaporated. I know that you think that you have some money coming to you from a Documentary and a TV series. After Mr. Hoffman files his Amended Complaint we shall see who still wants to do business with you. He does business in Hollywood, not me. 

I am not sure what Mr. Morgan will have to say after he comes to understand that Rebecca Morgan has been carrying on a cyber-affair with you, but that is none of my business. A cyber-affair has the virtue of being virtual, it does not transpire in meatspace, but it has consequences and impacts in the real world, as Ms. Burke can attest. Maybe you can prevail upon Stingy Steve Outtrim to help you, or Mr. Levine. 

You see, I am not you. I do not engage in tortious interference. I do not cyberstalk. I bully no one. I do not work for Hoffman, and he does not work for me. I know that you think that you can put together a RICO complaint. I encourage you to try. You will fail. 

I file criminal complaints. I consult lawyers before I act, and then I try to act carefully, with respect for the law. You make this easy, because you are a real criminal: you are a convicted felon, and you keep committing crimes, which you showcase for everyone watching on your YouTube channel and your Twitterfeed. 

I think that you need to be assessed by competent psychiatric authority, but first things first. For now, you have some legal decisions to make regarding Ms. Bogaerts and Mr. Hoffman. 

Calling me names, and trying to fat-shame me is not going to accomplish anything. The sad inadequacy of your black-screen videos is obvious. 

You claim that you are outplaying me in a phantom game of chess. I never play chess. I prefer the ancient game Go, but most of all, I prefer real life. 

You lost long ago. All that remains is to see the forms and dimensions of your defeat.

I am not done with you yet. Not by a long shot. 

But I hope that you enjoy these birthday presents. Maybe a little something extra can be delivered. 

Knock-knock, idiot! 

Who is it? 

Could be somebody important!