Sexual Assault: How do you cope with having sex?
Channel: CC explains it all
Date: 08/01/2021

This video is for survivors of sexual assault. When someone is sexually assaulted, their whole world view changes especially when it comes to sex. I am not a sex therapist. I am a mental health therapist and these are ways that I have found that helps cope with the flashbacks and feelings of shame and guilt related to the assault.

Recommendations: 
1) Don't try to have a lot of sex to erase the trauma because it does not work. 
2) Start learning what your likes and dislikes are (not only when it comes to sex). 
3) Find out what you're passionate about and experiment to know what you like and dislike. 
4) After you get to know yourself more, you will feel more confident and speak up about your likes and dislikes. 
5) If you feel triggered, STOP
6) Read sexy books (I recommend Laurell K Hamilton's Vampire Hunter Novel Series). 
7) Sensate Focus (Find out what your partner likes by communicating with them and make a game out of it). 
8) Keep your goal in your head. Remind yourself that sex is enjoyable. Recite affirmations to yourself like "I am enjoying this. I deserve to feel good." 
9) Give yourself PERMISSION to enjoy sex. 
10) Accept yourself as you are because you will not feel shame.