Daily Meditation - Restore the Years the Locusts Have Eaten
Channel: Jessica Mullen
Date: 2024-02-12

Download the meditation audio on Bandcamp!
https://jessicamullen.bandcamp.com/track/restore-the-years-the-locusts-have-eaten

+TRANSCRIPT+
Breathe in and raise your vibration.
Breathe out and release your resistance.

Relax your body.

Breathe in and say yes to what is.
Breathe out and welcome what is.

Yes, I feel forgotten. Yes, I feel discarded.

Breathe in and welcome what is, whatever it is.
Breathe out and smile.

Remind yourself it's not serious and it will pass.

Yes, I feel like trash. Yes, I feel worthless. Yes, I feel abandoned. Yes, I feel silly, foolish.

Breathe in and keep welcoming what is.
Breathe out and just notice what is. 

Notice what is arising in the field of awareness. Yes, pain is here. Yes, suffering is here. Yes, lack is here.

Breathe in and notice the desires. 
Breathe out and notice where you are seeking, where you are lacking.

I am seeking for attention. I am seeking for love. And I know what I'm doing. I know I've forgotten myself. I know that my presence is wanted. I know that I'm a wave looking to another wave for validation, for satisfaction when I'm the source of the wave.

Breathe in and remember you're the source of the wave.
Breathe out and remember you're the source.

This happens in cycles. This happens every time. I get attached to something. I think it's my reason for feeling good and then when it goes, I blame myself for being unlovable, un-wantable, and forgettable. I feel forgettable, forgotten. But I know I did it to myself. I forgot myself, my capital S, self. Mixed with experience, went into the world, started depending on things in the world to make me feel good. Instead of the only thing, that's the source, my capital S, self.

Breathe in and remember you're the source.
Breathe out and don't even bother feeling sorry for yourself. 

The world isn't happening to you. It's happening for you. And if you're suffering, lacking, seeking, you have the power to fix it all, to restore the years the locusts have eaten. Restore those years right now. Take your fucking power back. You don't even have to cry about it this time.

Breathe in and remember who you are.
Breathe out and stand up to your thoughts.

Stand up to that seeking, those desires, the feeling that something outside of you is missing, and if you could just get it, then you'd be okay. But if you just got it and you'd be okay, then when it leaves, you won't be okay. The point is to be okay no matter what comes and goes. So right now, decide to be okay no matter what comes or goes.

Breathe in and be the source.
Breathe out and say thank you to whatever circumstance brought you here, that made you seek so hard for fulfillment and satisfaction in the world. That made you feel so forgotten, so forgettable, so unloved.

Breathe in and be the source of your experience.
Breathe out and stop blaming other people, because you are the source of other people as well.

It's ridiculous, foolish, sad to blame other people when you are the source.

Breathe in and come back to the source.
Breathe out and smile, because this is your fucking power.

You can always come back to the source. Let go of your seeking. Let go of thinking the world's ever going to fill you up. No person's ever going to fill you up. And if you need them to feel good, you're never going to feel good. You might temporarily get a blast of satisfaction like you would from a drug when that person gives you the attention you want, but what happens when it leaves again? Same thing, over and over and over and over.

Breathe in and break that fucking cycle.
Breathe out and say thank you to the waves for making you recognize the cyclical nature of wanting, not getting, and realizing you are the source and you get it from within.

And then things start going good again and you get attached to those things going good. And the cycle starts again.

Breathe in and break the cycle today.
Breathe out and stop looking to other people or circumstances to fill you up.

Only you can fill you up. Only your presence fills you up, because that's god. Only practicing the presence of god fills you.

Breathe in and remember who you are.
Breathe out and say thank you.

Thank you, thank you for everything that led you here. You are now back in your power. You are now back in control because you let go of trying to control the world. It's not up to you. It just doesn't matter. Fuck it. Let it go.

Breathe in and say thank you.
Breathe out and trust the process of life with thank you.

It's all happening in your favor and this right now happens so you could remember your Self so that you could go back to your presence. The only thing missing is your presence. And if you feel forgotten, it's because you forgot your damn self. And you can remember right now with thank you, or am I aware? or who am I? or am I awareness?

Breathing in, thank you.
Breathe out, thank you.

Thank you, thank you. I know it's in my favor. Thank you.