Orthopedic Noir S01 E01
Channel: Gabriel Orgrease
Date: 2012-03-10

A creative collaboration between Michael L. Johnson and Gabriel Orgrease.

It was a dark night. The snow was just starting to fall. Behind me stood a guy with a gun, still smoking. Back down the street past the door to the private club, a man was down and bleeding...  

Ever since those nights in the freezer I had known that something sinister was afoot.

That man down and bleeding was my owner Johnny Peghead, the right-wingtip poll buster... and somehow I had been thrown free of his fleshy impediment fully conscious and awake on the cement pavement next to the shatters of his axe handle. 

And here I was anxious to step forward on my own path to find out where my sole mate Lucy the Brown Shoe had soft-toed in the dark night.  

For everything, everything I was blinded and furiously laced up in my fury over her flirtation last Saturday night with the Big Red Sock.  

The only sound for a while was me, clicking on the sidewalk; the guy with the gun called out, "Hey Buddy, You left your lights on."  Not my car was all I said as I stopped, and the clicking stopped, and I slowly turned...

I arched an eyebrow in the general direction of the loafers before I realized that they were twins with a big fat white man stuck in them. They were almost burst at the seams. I whistled and they danced and the big white fat man fell over on his belly and fatally stabbed himself and bled out on the razor sharp edge of Johnny Peghead's prosthetic titanium knee cap.  

G O R Y!

...a squad car pulled up and a couple of gumshoes popped out...

...or maybe it was an unmarked Ford coupe that pulled up and a quartet of gumshoes popped out...