Thirty Years Worth of Marital Advice | Hina Khan-Mukhtar
Channel: Muslim Community Center - MCC East Bay
Date: 2023-12-13

– Article "25 Years’ Worth of Marriage Advice": https://hinakm.com/25-years-worth-of-marriage-advice
Podcast "What We Need to Thrive in Marriage": https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=MCn1nZmUVaY 
– Complete talk " The Struggles of Marriage in the Muslim Community & Tools for a Healthier Relationship": https://youtu.be/zYCKF9exwtM
– More Sr. Hina: https://mcceastbay.org/hina
– More Islamic marriage talks & workshops: http://mcceastbay.org/marriage
– More talks co-sponsored with Wasilah Connections: http://mcceastbay.org/wasilah

This seminar was delivered at the Muslim Community Center - East Bay (MCC East Bay) in Pleasanton, California on December 9, 2023.

Hina Khan-Mukhtar is a married mother of three young men and one of the founders of the homeschooling co-operative known as ILM Tree in Lafayette, California, which now serves over 35 homeschooling families in the East Bay. In addition to teaching Language Arts to elementary, middle, and high school students, she is also involved in interfaith dialogue. Hina was a monthly contributor to The Muslim Observer’s “Raising Our Ummah” column. She also writes for Seeker’s Guidance, where she shares parenting advice and ideas for nurturing spiritual traditions in childhood. Learn more about her at https://hinakm.com

– More Sr. Hina: https://mcceastbay.org/hina

Talk notes
00:00 Introduction
3:10 Make Allah your main concern 
7:00 Love and affection 
10:30 Special routine 
11:47 Passion and interests 
14:00 Fulfilling sexual needs 
14:52 Praying to Allah
15:40 Men need to be respected 
17:48 Social media 
18:24 Laughing rules 
18:33 Make your home 
19:30 Crucial points on contact with non mahrams 21:34
20:07 What does domestic bliss look like 
21:23 Everything about you should be…
22:12 Conflict is inevitable 
24:22 Self reflection and apologizing 
24:50 Everyone gets angry 
25:55 Don’t be disrespectful 
27:04 Your spouse is not a mind reader
28:30 Sleep on it and snuggle it out
29:05 Avoid arguing in front of kids 
29:32 Holding grudges and learning to forgive 
29:50 Keep a sense of humor 
30:48 Being a family uniter and not a divider
31:26 Relationships with in-laws and parents 
34:03 Don’t try and keep up with Joneses and don’t ever pay interest 
35:02 Only complain to Allah and be grateful 
36:33 The little things that irritate you: everyone has flaws 
37:22 Happiness Vs Contentment: Don’t take one another for granted 
37:58 Have a mentor in marriage: Needs to be a Muslim 
39:40 Soar spiritually
40:28 Your spouse comes first
40:55 Grow spiritually together 

Other notes:
1. Make ٱللَّٰه your main concern.
2. Know love languages.
3. Have something special between two of you and guard it.
4. Have your own passion projects (have healthy interest in their interests).
5. Fulfill sexual needs

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