The Federal mirror — Concord, N.H., 1795-05-08 00:00:00, page 4

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The Parnassian Field.
THE DIALOGUE:
, Ate the ROM ancer — Ata ,be Modern
Shopkeeper. J''-)
^ U TELL, neighbor, bra is trades day ?
"Ha! hrba! brijk,
" No, faith, daU."
«' Dall-re can't meaner, vbat ,ox ja,-;
'^4 fared, breathe—m, fap's fofaU?!
" This week has beea a little thrift, :
Ore Monday, ere 'twas time to dine, , ' :^
1 counted,fir, twice smiling fifty;
^d 4 f„o, twice fifty nine."
" Tbed—l,^ did !" "By—— *tb tael!
Ou Tuesday, left ; though net much, neither ;
It rain'd,,ta know ; and bail'd, and blew;
Ninety's not had for fueb foul weather."
" Ninety on Tutsda, ! ! Ifame doubt
Tour mem'r, dots not feroe,u rigb;
Ijcarceljfaw a person out——
But fix pence in „ drawer at night."
" True, Tuesday was a little foul;
But Wednesday was a glorious day ;
Cool two hundred, on mj foul, Q
Betides odd pence i throw away.
Thursday the fa bone fair and clear ;
The ladies love teJbow their drejs;
Mere runners— Sir, your goods are dear!
I counted (event,, ue'ertbslefs.
Friday, ,n know, by good old Tabbies,
Is reckon'd l&cklefs, and ill-fated ;
Mere trajb, to toll to beys and babies —
.Sure eighty can't befe ill-rated.
Dot tbisis Satsrday, at nine :
And if Iguefsb^ wbatrto tak,n, ^ ^
Byntybt,fr, ninety pounds are mine ; -
Or lam dev'lilhly miflaken." ^
"To jell,our goods, fir, at this rate,
Would fbrink,our Jbelwos, andjbow,our walls;
Seven hundred dolls, and fifty eight,
Per week !" " Mere trifle fir, but custom calls.”
As we are told in Scripture days,
Os certain widow's ernife of oil,
Though par'd for as a hundred ways,>
Would never Jbrink, nor never;,oil ;
So modern days can boaftaftore,
Where goods thus monstrously are felling ;
And tbougbyou feareb a week or &re,
- You mifsScarce voortb of fmgle (hilling.
Laugh $ Or, as you please.
AN Irishman, who lately came to
America, was travelling through
^country town one day, and to his
great furprize he saw A large black
bog, without either ears or tail. He
liked a gentleman what it w% He
laid it was a hog. "0, and b, J— j
Jam ferpriwd ;'' "Ab, ab, (laid the
gentleman) fa rafftofaar. for I
cm a Judice of tbe Peace." "6; and
^ ,— j lam more fur,ized now tto
A was before."
The OLD SOW tagbed.
A MAN being troubled by a neigh
bor's iheep, caught one, and cutting
a flit in one hind leg above the gam
orel joint, lent the sheep away with,
one hind leg flipt through the other.
Theowner of the sheep, to be reveng
ed, caught the man's sow, and split
her jaws up to her ears—The man
enquired of hit neighbor, why he cut
fa low's mouth? But hit neighbor
answered, that the old sow, feeing his
4heep hobbling along with one leg
through the other, fell to laughing so
heartily at the oddity, that (he split
her mouth to her can,
_——=—=
Miscellany.
THE PHIU^^
_ CURIOSITY engaged me not long
since to fee a pompous proceffion,—
'Struggling for some time, inorder to
be firft.to fee the cavalcade at it paff
g> ed, some one of the croud unluckily
happened to tread upon my shoe, &
tore it in fach manner as utterly un
qualified me to march forward with
the main body. Thu, rendered in- ]
capable of being a fye&Kor of the
^ to myfelf, Iwa, Qft willow
#^^3
^re extraordinary than any 1 had
, yet seen. A cobler fat in his stall by
the way fide, and continued to work,
' while the croud puffed by, without
( the appearance of the fmatleft share
of curiosity. I own hit want of at-,
tention excited mine ; and as I Rood
in need of his assistance, I thought it.
best to employ a philosophical cob
ler on this occasion. Perceiving my
bufinefa therefore, he desired me to
enter and fit down, took my shoe in
his lap, add began to mend it. " How
my friend," laid I to him, "can you
continue to work while all these fine
things are patting by your door ?"
"Very fine they are, matter," said
the cobler, " for those that like them,
to be fore ; but what are all thole fine
things tome ? You don't know what
it is robe aeobler, and so much the
better for yourfelf: your bread is
baked ; you may go and fee fights
the whole day, and eat a warm (up
per when you come home at nights
But for me, If 1 (hould run a hunt
.ing after all those fine folki, what
should I get by my journey but an
appetite ? And, Heaven help me, 1
have enough of that already, with
out leaving my work to get it. No,
master, as God has called me into
thia world to mend old (hoes, I have
no bufinefi with fine folks, and they
no business with me. See thia last
and hammer, they are the two best
friendi l have in thia world: Nobody,
else will be my friend, because I want
a friend. The great folks you saw
pass by just now, have five hundred
friends, because they have no occa
sion for them. Now while I stick to
my good friends here, I am content
ed ; but whenever I run after fights
and fine things, I begin to hate my
work ; I grow fad, and have no heart
to mend (hoes any longer.
" thrive lived a wandering life now
fifty-five years, here to day, and gone
to-morrow; for it was my misfor
tune, when I was young, to be fond
of changing." " You have been a
traveller then, I presume, &rid I.—
" I can't boast of travelling, contin
ued he ; "for I have never left the
parifli in which I was born but three
times in my life, that I can remem
ber § but then therein net a street it
the whole neighbourhood that I hive
not lived in at some time or Inother.
When I began to fettle, and take to
my bufinefi in one street, some unfore
feen ^misfortune, or a desire of trying
my luck elsewhere, has removed me,
perhaps a whole mile, away from my
former customers ; while some more
luckly cobler would come into my
place, and make a handsome fortune
among friends of my making : There
waapne who tauslly died in a stall
that 1 had left, worth seven pounds
seven (hillings, all in hard gold,
which he had quitted into the waist
band of his breeches."'
I could not but fmi(e at these mi
grations, and continued to ask if he
had ever been married ? " Aye, thty
I have, master," replied hfi " for
tee o long yeai,; and a weary life I
had of it, Heaven knows. My wife
took it into her head, that the only
way to thrive in this world, was to
Give money ;% all that tfer (he
could lay her hands upon the u(ed to
hide away from me, though we were
obliged taftarye the whole week af
ter & The firflehree years we used
^^ ^^^
: tired of quarrelling to getting the
ta^i and (he leaped to scraped
« nieafure, ,M Itahnoft1tahnoft ftarwdf
# P??% ^ ^^ CT^*
M, tndefp&r, to the afehoufe : Here
I used to fir with persons who hated
home, like mjfelf, drank while 1 had
money left, and run in (core when
any body would trust me ; 'till at
last, my landlady coming one day
with along bill when Iwas from
■home, and putting it into my wife's
'hands, the length of it effearally
broke her heart. I searched the whole
stall, alter (he was dead, for money ;
but (he had hidden it so secretly, that
with all my pains I could never find a
farthing."
By this time my (hoe was mend
ed ; and fatisfying the poor artist for
his work, I took my leave, and re
turned home to lengthen out the a
muiement his conversation had af
forded, by communicating it to a
friend.
Hiflorical Anecdote of Abe famoor
Charles le ®,int.
THE Emperor Charles V. having
one day loft his way as he was hunt
ing in a sorest, and being pretty far
distant from Sis company, found him
felf, after wandering about some time,
near an inn, which he entered to re
frelh himfelf. Being seated, he saw
four men, whose appearance boded
him no good ; however, he took no
notice, but called for what he want
ed. xThefe men at firft were! laid
down, and pretended to deep. But
one soon rose up, and approached the
Emperor, told- him, that he had
dreamt he ought to take away his hat,
and in faying so, foatched it from
him. A second then came to him,
and faying he had dreamt that his
furtout would fit him very well, took
that from him. A third cast hjs eye
on his buff waistcoat, and ftript him
of it. The fourth dreamt, likewise
in his turn, and tells the prince not to
take it amife, if he gave himfelf the
trouble to search him, and feeing a
gold chain about his neck to which
hung a flagelet, be went to take it
from : Stay, my friend, said the Em
peror to him, before you rob me of
this dear whistle, fuffer me to (hew
you the property of it, and at the
fame time he began to whiftle^ His
attendants, who had fought him
throughout the sorest, happily arriv
ed near the inn, and on hearing the
found, went in, and were much sur
prised to fee him in that condition.—
Behold, said the Emperor, on feeing
them, a fee of people who have
dreamt just what they pleafad, I too
am disposed to dream in my turn ,
and having doled a little, he said to
his attendants, I have dreamt that
those gentlemen, the, dreamers, all
four deserve the gallows; and it is
my will that my dream be fulfilled
direaiy. They accordingly hanged
them all four opposite the ion.
Drril adventure of a Siltfan PricS, related in the
King of Prussia's Campaigns.
COLONEL Fouquet, having en
tered Cremfitz with fix companies of
[grenadiers, hao placed a centime! on
the wall, near the house of a priest, or
Crater 'the good man, finding
himfelf much difftirbed by the fre
quent repetition of Qii vo As ? which
the ceptin^l pronounced, with 4 loud
voice, every quarter of an hour, re
solved to make the foldieri weary of
this post, arid with this view contriv
ed to mask himfelf like a devil ; ac
cordirigl,; horns, elsws, the serpent's
tail; cloven feet, an# the fork were
got re&d, ; and our priest, having
equipped himfelf toWiowp fathfae
tion, and like a real devil, begin to
4 & hit part, by advicing toQthe
ceminel, and at every step, fcratchipg
the vdl with the fork. . The great J
di, began tp feel some tremor, but
did not toe Wpft ^W,ft^
OCT until the devils homing mm
and presenting the tie point) of his
fork, cried out . with a hoarse voice, t
Thou shalt die by my hand; then
the soldier got the better of his feats, fa
and boldly cocked his musket. The
fpedre heard the click of this fsulin-u
ftfument, and of a sudden losing all
confidence in his fork and the whole^
of his apparatus, recoiled, and want
ed to save his honour by a flow re
treat. The grenadier, on the contra
ry, having once made free with this'
imaginary devil, followed him close,
and saw him enter the house of the
curate, by a little back door. Upon
this he called to his assistance some of
his companions, who were not a great
way eff ; and they coming readily to
his relief, the door was quickly forc
ed open, and Belzebub seized with all
his infernal habiliments, before he!
had time to put them off. As soon
as he was taken, he was conducted
to the nearest post, whence he was
next day trim (ported to the mrin-'
guard, and flogged like a poor devil,l
in the fight of the whole to wo. The 1
clergy made a great noise about tins .■
affair ; but the Colonel giving them
to understand, that the worthtefe Le
vite had, by this impudent masque
rade, infuked the garrison, and con
sequently all the King's troops, mat
ters were made up in foch a manner
that the poor curate was (hut up in a
convent to do penace, and the clergy # |
paid a fine of ninety ducats, of which
each company had fifteen, to pur
chase them black fpatterdafh, Ev-■
ery body thought this adventure very■
diverting, and the soldiers said to one • I
another, that the devil had taken
pains to provide them with (patter- I
dashes;
1 "I■In!■7!I -I " - I
• _ ,
Moses Merrill's eflate.
BY virtue of a Licence from the
Honorable Samuel Tenny, Efa. 4■
Judge of Probate of Wills, &c. within and■
for the county of Rockingham,■
r WILL BE SOLD,
I At PUBLIC VENDUE,
At the house of Richard Bartlett, Esq. inn
holder in Pembroke, in faidcounty, on Sa
' turday the i6th day of May next, at two of
I the dock in the afternoon,
Part of the REAL ESTATE, .
which was of Moses Merrill, late of said Pem
broke, Gentleman, deceased ; confiding of
A PIECE of LAND,
situated in said Pembroke on the main street, ■
containing about twenty five acres; and the ,■
westerly end of the Dwelling House on the
premises, being the Reversion of the Widow's
Dower, Articles of sale to be seen at time
and place,
TIMOTHY WALKER,
Administrator to said Eftate.l
• Concord, Aprilaz, 1795. * | |
WILD-DEER,I
U7ILL ba@d at the Stable of the ~
Subßriber, this Season—The terms
will be the fame as for the ,aft season.
Good pasturing for Mates may be■
had if wanted.l
JOHN BACHELDER.|
Concord, April 28, lyfor
FOR tALEp
T'HE Subferiber has a quantity of |
I HAY, which he will fell at Six Dol
lers per Ton, which is only half the price <•■
Major Duncan fells at, Madvertifed in the
last Cfoer. 4 JOHN ROCHE.|
Coricord. May 1, 1795. 2 ,
—tOQt—t__———=—=—l^^ ■
^WS' BOOKS. W^^ ^1
>.ro^
The following BOOKS, fc • |
Watt's Psalms and Hymns,A
The Death : f fc^',
Onto#Revived, ire. b ^ ^'^^M