The Federal mirror — Concord, N.H., 1795-08-07 00:00:00, page 4

An English verification of a Scotch Epigram,
com;Jfed before the year 1600.
JACK ! quotb his father, can you tell,
What fate will give me caje ?'
Itire, whenftanding—when I kneel,
- Sharp pains invade m, knees. '&
To walk— m, feet all blfer o'er,
M, back acbes—ifin bed ;
And if I fit —my hips are fore,
To leao—aJfrßs in, bead.
Yes, Sire ! quoth Jack, one way remains,
the la, witbin, oui° pow'r ; e g .•
• Since none of these relieve your pains,
Try hanging—half an hour.
The Humrift.
A SWISS Captain burying pell
mell in the field of battle, it was
represented to him that feme of those
whom he thua buried were not quite
dead, and with care might recover,—
" Poh! poh'l" laid he, "if you take
their word for it, there ii not a man
of 'em, will own himfelf dead."
V ^_ T ^ ■_■_- • —•
n EA N Swift having preached an
"affizefermon in Ireland, was af
terwards invited to dine with the
Judges, and having in hit difeourfe
considered the use and abuse of the
law, he had bore a little hard upon
those Councilors who plead cause,
which they know i, their conferences
to be wrong ; when dinner was over
and the glass began, to go round, a
young- Barrister who happened to be
prefect, took occasion to retort upon
the Dean, and after many altercations
on both lides, the Councilor at left
'WHENwe dwell on the lips of the la/s we adore,
Not a pkajure in Nature is miffing ;
Mr, bis foul be in heaven, he dejerv'd it, I'mfare,
Who warfrf the inventor of Kissing,
Mffer Adam Iver, well think was the man,
^Wboje dfcover, will ne'er be jutpafs'd—
Well, face thegame if creation began,
To the end of the world ma, it las !
'From the parch'd herbage, lingering flocks offoeep,
Langnidl, fray, to fate the /corebing beam,
With weary fte, the, leave the duff, seep,
And fiek refrejhment in the lucid flream.
The brown dried verdure of the fanny glade,
No mire invites th' unbrowfag herd to feed;
The drooping trials foun the thirfly mead,
And court the cool djylum of tbe/hade.
So from his harvest toils the ruflic freed,
"Seeks the deep grove, and woos hisfav'rite maid.
ALA.
40^
THE PARNASSIAN FIELD.
.7ii.‘m.'^»»* ■"■* ""**
fkomthe NE^IORK HER ALD.
FROM A COUNTRY CORRESPONDENT..
HERALD, tbro' tbe State proclaim,
Triumphant Reafo*pboneft Fame ;
An Olive Wreath, let truth convey.
To crown the Guardian brow of , AY.
Hail him, Father of the land,
Bleft with legaljuft command,
Public good, impartiality,
Shall mark the views of Patriot , AY.
'Twas be, great Franklin by bis fide,
Our Triumph fix'd o'er Britijb Pride ;
War claims secured, rough war gave way,
We chose our rulers —cbufe a JAY.
'Twas be for public good employ d.
Parties petty claims defray'd ;
Our Feuds with England done away,
Fraternity now Jmi les upon JAY.
Let difeordant passion cease;
Virtue, knowledge, arts of Peace ;
Let Columbia now dis play,
And own the aiding band of JAY.
Hail him Father of the land,
Bleft with legal,juf command,
'Public good, impartial sway,
Shall mark the views of Patriot JAY.
;FrOM the high arch, behold th' effulgent orb.
Pours down bis vaf consolidated ray !
L/is glowing powers the dewy mifls absorb,
And Nature fekens at the radiant day !
'SONNET to SUMMER.
KISSING:
by Peter Pi n dar, Esq.
WHENEVER you go to the
Coffee-Houfe, monopolize all
the newspapers ; and whatever paper
is wanted most, be sure to keep that
the longest.
Whenevq^M&Win conversation
to amuse thecoraflfybegin to laugh
most immoderate; thereby you will
command the attention of all the spec
tators.
If any gentleman tells a remarka
bly good ftbry, never laugh, but im
mediately answer it with another, and
laugh as much as you please.
Wherever you go, be determined to
find fault with every thing ; thereby
you prove yourfelf to be a man of
^conlequence.,
Let your speeches be always pre
ceded by ,some prett, oaths# Similies
are very requifice to heighten conver
sation ; no matter how unlike rhe fub
jea they may be ; should you be t
ftray for one to enforce your argu
ments, think of your maffir, and you
can never want. Certainly the black
gentleman is the most convenient ; and
as he is the nearest to our mouths—
logic—be must be nearest to our themes;
and bo matter what, he referable ev
ery thing.— She's handfame as the de
vil-ugly as ibe devil—bard as the de
vil—Jofl as the devil— hot as the devil
—cold as the devil—devli/b good hu
mored —devlijb cross.
Do you with to be inlove ? visit
your miftrels when you have drank
freely of your bottle. Spirits give
fpirils; and a man can never talk of
his heart, unless something puts into
bis bead; then p'radifea dyiag speech;
thump your head; flourish your hand
kerchief, and prefect a pistol. If she
is riot moved with this, I shall give
you leave to ffioot yourfelf.,
Whenever you are in company
with ladies, endeavor to few your
feafe and learning.—Seleft as many
tod words as possible, and qoute pas
sages out of Horace and Homer.—
Alite the former as a fine Grecian,
and the latter for excelling in Latin.
If you meet with a lady who knows
Miscellany.
INSTRUCTION^fo^INE GENTLEMEN.
AN author after reading a play to
Quin, which was totally devoid of
merits Quin told him it would not do
by any means, I wish, said the author,
you could advise me what is best to
do with it — That I can, said Quin, blot
out one balf, and burn the other.
allied him, If the Devil teas to die,
whether a Parson might not be found,
for money, to preach bis funeral firman?
Yes, said Swift, and 1 would gladly be
the man, for I would then give the De
vil bis due, as 1 have this day hit chil
dren.
foe'
A SIMPLE fellow walking in the
fields alone, came at lift to $ ditch,
and making a pause, now, Rebin, fays
he to himfelf, what dost thou think,
canst thou leap over this ditch or no?
In faith, laid he to himfelf, I cannot
tell; but if thou wile Robin, I will
lay a crown I do.—A match. And
to he prepared himfelf to leap, and
taking a good run, having the advan
tages! the bank, he leaped quite over.
Ah, boy, said he, there's your crown.
But now, Robin, wilt thou lay anoth
er, that thou canst leap back? Faith,
that's very difficult ; nevertheleft,
hang it ; 1 have won a crown, I will
venture it thtt I do. Then taking a
good run, he leapt just io the middle,
up to the waist io mire and water ;
but crawling out on the other fide,
hang it, replied he, I don't much care,
for 1 have neither won nor loft.
ASHES, Pot, ton, 50/.
=+— Pearl, — 4.5/.
Beans, white, bujh. Bs.
Beef, prime, barrel, 72s
=—-mtf, — 8p
Butter, pound, sod
Brand,, gallon, 9s.
Boards, prime, M. 96s
2d quality, 635.
Barley, bufal, p,
Bees wax, lb. 2s
Coffee, lb. isl.
Chocolate, lb. Is;.
Cotton, jouth,. IJ4<
tnjlindia, 1/9
Corn, f outb, befa 5/•
—l — north, ;s6<
Codffo, quintal, 2;s-
Cheese, lb. 1004
Flour,fuperj.bbl. 78s<
— common, 75 J •
middling, 66s^
Flax, lb. 9a
Flaxjeed, bujh. 416
Gunpowder, lb. 316
Gin,foreign, gal. 8,6 1
home, 5/9)
Hogs lard, lb. lid•
•Hoops, hegJh. M. IZOJ -
barrel, 90s i
Herrings, dry, bbl. 24/ -
= —pickled, 26sS
Iron, American,ton, 281
= Swedes, 2811
Indigo, Carolina, lb.fy /
French, 9s I
Lemons, box, 33 s "
Molasses, gall. ,6-
Oil, linjeed, gall. 416,
ATTENTION! 1
IF Mary Clark, alias Hutchens, or
her heirs, or legal representative, will ap
ply to Mr. Jacob Clark, of Medfield, in the
county of Suffolk, (now Norfolk, state of
Massachusetts, fhe,may receive a handsome
Legacy, left her by her father, Edward
Clark, late of Medfield aforefaid, deceased.
k. As it is unknown where the said Mary
is now resident, the several printers in this
and the neighboring states, are earnestly re
quested to publish the above in their papers,
three weeks successively, June 30.
To carry a feoff-bex is highly es
sential ; but then you muff learn to
take a pinch with an air ; at the fame
time cock up the little finger to shew
you have a ring. When the conver
sation begins to be very warm, and
the arguments very powerful, a pinch
of fnuff is an excellent excuse for not
speaking ; because, if they insist upon
your reasons, you may set up a mock
freeze ; and by the time that is finish
ed—" Damn it, you forgot what you
were going to fay."
It fhew# a great genius to tell a
good lie, now and then with a very
serious face ; which, if you please, you
may confirm as truth, by pawning four
honor ; for then, though ever so much
doubted, it must be fallowed : ln :
deed it requires great sagacity to bounce
—and greater to bounce out, and unsay
what you have said, whenever a dis
covery is made : The best method of
doing this, is by prefacing the story
'be, fay—for then, they, whoever they
are, are the liars, and not you ; but if
it is a lie, which must be told upon
very good authority, mentioned a gen
tleman's name, who never was in be
ing, and ask if they knew him ; and
as they do not, declare he is a man of
the ftrideft truth, the most unexcep
tionable character, & that it was from
him you heard so and so; which, there
fore you are convinced is truth :—
Should, however, your story be con
tradiaed, and absolutely declared to
be falfe, then you may fay that your
friend Mr, , (the name of the
non exiting gentleman) had it from
Mr. , (a well known name) who
you are very sorry to find is a damn
ed liar, [Walpole paper.]
[lnf rations for fine Ladies, next week.]
By the quantity, at Boston, July 28.
Copied from the Mercury.
more than yautfcifjbe always of her
opinion, and exclaim, " God's curse,
you have taken them words out of my
mouth."
Prices Current,
Oats, bufo. 316
Pork, I bogg, bbl. 102 s
—I & half do. 96s
— middlings, 120/
Pitch, bbl. IBs
Pepper, lb. 2sß
Rum, Wtfin.gal. 6s
New. 4/
Rice, cwt. 36s
Raifas, caJk, 39s
jar, 20s
Rye, bast. 8s
Rosin, bbl. 24s
Sugar, Mufa. cwt. 72s
• loaf, lb. IS7
white, cwt. 40s
Soap, turpentine, lb. 1s
cajlile, I'4
Salmon, bbl. 54'
Salt, coarse, bbd. 36s
fine, 24s
Staves, white oak,
barrel, M. 10&
red oak, hhd. 66s
— ,bl. 54s
Shingles, mcr. M. 18s
Tea, Bobea, lb. . 253
- Souchong, ~
Hyfon, 17/
Tobacco,foip. cwt. 39s
— — maaufaa. 46s
Tar, bbl. 15s
Turpentine, 18s
Taltow, lb. 12d
Wheat, bujh. 12s
Wine, Madeir. gal. 12s
— = Sherry, 716
LiJbon, ; cmJk, 9s
— Malaga, — 138/
mmmomtm© =m—mnrammmtc„
He likewise invites all Medical pa
terns of erudition, to examine into his med
ical celebrity, that they may have no suspi
cion that he is unqualified for the amazing
talk he has undertaken for the health and
happiness of mankind.
That the inhabitants of this state,
who are unacquainted with the literary ad
vantages of the Subferiber, may not die thro'
lack of vision, he informs them that he has
studied with one of the best KITRIDGES in
America, betides other eminent Physicians ;
and that he now owns the most moderp and
approved of Library within the realms of
Newhampfhire—for which reason he invites
all Pupils, who with to store their cranniums
with the noblest of old Europe's productions,,
to call on him, and every favor shall be ac
knowledged by the Public's sincere friend,
JOSIAH HILDRETH.
Deerfield, July 19, 1795, 4
__—_.— —.l „ 11
Apprentice wanted.
WANTED an Apprentice, from 15 to
17 years of age, to serve at the Cloth
ier's business. Apply to Moses Clark, of
Gilman ton. July 14, 179$ 4
Saddle Bags Loft. °
r OST, on Wednesday last, between Chef-
Li ter meeting house and Concord, a final!
pair of black grained Saddle Bags, contain
ing sundry articles. Whoever has taken up'
said Saddle Bags, and will return them, or
give information to the fubferiber, shall re
ceive a generous reward.
NATHANIEL LADD.
Concord, June 29, 1795. ' 4
,; ; — — (,
RAGS wanted.
J Call at this Office, and we'll pay Caflu ,
SITUATED in Springfield, (for
merly called Protedworth) in the
county of Grafton, within a mile and
a half of the centre of the town, on
a public road, which runs through
said land, and near to inhabitants.—
There is two acres of said land cleared
and into graft. The land is timbered
with rock maple, beech, black birtch,
and some very valuable white pine
trees, &c.
It will be fold very cheap for Cash,
and a generous pay day given for pare
of the money.—This will be a good
bargain for a young man. For fur
ther particulars apply to
ELIJAH RUSSELL.
Cencord, July 31, 1795. 5
THE Subscriber, willing to do all
the good he possibly can for the people
of Newhampfhire, takes this opportunity to
inform them that he now resides in Deerfield
on the middle fouth road, one mile north
weft of the Baptist meeting house—where he
will be found at any hour in the 24, ready
to attend on the important feience of Physic,
Surgery and Midwifry.
The Subferiber, from the great suc
cess he has met with in the cure of ulcers and
fores of all kinds, calls on all persons labors
ing under those infirmities, to call on him,
that their health may be recovered.
Good LAND,
Supervisor's Office, July 11,1795,
NOTICE ishereby given to all
concerned, That a Collector of
the Revenue is appointed at Dover,
for the county of Strafford, where an
office is opened under the care of Mr.
James Jewett, for issuing Licenses
to retailers of wines and fpiritoue li
quon, making entry of carriages, and
tranfading all other bufinets in the
Revenue (of this department) agreea
ble to law.
fi^e publish rhe fblfo^ing for the Mentha 1
and Information of our Cuh&ners in Straf
ford counjy.MlßßOß.].
TO BE SOLD, CHEAP,
One Hundred and Fifty Acres
OF
JOSHUA WENTWORTH,
Supervisor.
Fellow Mortals attend !
NEWL%ND for sale.
DiflriEl of Newbampfbire.
WELL WATERED,