From: grector@reliant.com
Date: 2002-02-15 17:32:00+00:00
Subject: FW: FW: Axis of Evil




How proud I would be if I had written this one:




>> >"In his State of the Union Address, Bush Calls Iraq, Iran and North 
>>Korea
> >'Axis of Evil"
> >-- N.Y. Times, 1/30/02
> >
> >  * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * *
> >ANGERED BY SNUBBING, LIBYA, CHINA and SYRIA FORM "AXIS OF JUST AS EVIL"
> >Cuba, Sudan, Serbia Form Axis of Somewhat Evil; Other Nations Start Own
> >Clubs
> >
> >Beijing -- Bitter after being snubbed for membership in the "Axis of 
>Evil,"
> >Libya, China, and Syria today announced they had formed the "Axis of Just
> >as Evil," which they said would be way eviler than "that stupid
> >Iran-Iraq-North Korea axis President Bush warned of" in his State of the
> >Union address.
> >
> >Axis of Evil members, however, immediately dismissed the new axis as
> >having, for starters, a really dumb name. "Right. They are Just as 
>Evil...
> >in their dreams!" declared North Korean leader Kim Jong-il.  "Everybody
> >knows we're the best evils... best at being evil... we're the best."
> >
> >Diplomats from Syria denied they were jealous over being excluded, 
>although
> >they conceded they did ask if they could join the Axis of Evil. "They 
>told
> >us it was full," said Syrian President Bashar al-Assad. "An Axis can't 
>have
> >more than three countries," explained Iraqi President Saddam Hussein. 
>"This
> >is not my rule, it's tradition. In World War II you had Germany, Italy, 
>and
> >Japan in the evil Axis. So you can only have three. And a secret 
>handshake.
> >Ours is wicked cool."
> >
> >THE AXIS PANDEMIC
> >
> >International reaction to Bush's Axis of Evil declaration was swift, as
> >within minutes, France surrendered.  Elsewhere, peer-conscious nations
> >rushed to gain triumvirate status in what became a game of geopolitical
> >chairs.  Cuba, Sudan, and Serbia said they had formed the Axis of 
>Somewhat
> >Evil, forcing Somalia to join with Uganda and Myanmar in the Axis of
> >Occasionally Evil, while Bulgaria, Indonesia and Russia established the
> >Axis of Not So Much Evil Really As Just Generally Disagreeable.
> >
> >With the criteria suddenly expanded and all the desirable clubs filling 
>up,
> >Sierra Leone, El Salvador, and Rwanda applied to be called the Axis of
> >Countries That Aren't the Worst But Certainly Won't Be Asked to Host the
> >Olympics.
> >
> >Canada, Mexico, and Australia formed the Axis of Nations That Are 
>Actually
> >Quite Nice But Secretly Have Nasty Thoughts About America, while Spain,
> >Scotland, and New Zealand established the Axis of Countries That Be 
>Allowed
> >to Ask Sheep to Wear Lipstick. "That's not a threat, really, just 
>something
> >we like to do," said Scottish Executive First Minister Jack McConnell.
> >
> >While wondering if the other nations of the world weren't perhaps making
> >fun of him, a cautious Bush granted approval for most axes, although he
> >rejected the establishment of the Axis of Countries Whose Names End in
> >"Guay," accusing one of its members of filing a false application.
> >Officials from Paraguay, Uruguay, and Chadguay denied the charges.
> >
> >Israel, meanwhile, insisted it didn't want to join any Axis, but 
>privately,
> >world leaders said that's only because no one asked them. > ?
> >
>
>
>

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