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My Mother, Myself (Read 841 times)

Krista ShippMemberMy Mother, Myself« on: 26.12.2009 at 15:00 [UT] »(no birth time is known for my Sainted mom- so I used noon for the B)

MothersPlanets

Posts: 15841
Gender:MyPlanets

A-4l

A 28 dB 13 h

B 17l

C8k

C 22 e

D 12a

D 10 f

E 14e rx

E 12 d

F 2a

F 13a

G 10 d rx

G 28 f

O- 16kO- 10 dI 00e rx

I-16 g

J 01e rx

J 17e

K 7k

K 10 l

N 21 lN 27i

Pars Forune- 4l
Ceres 23b

M 1d
Vertex 16h

PF- 10 l
Ceres-1 6 l

M2dVertex- 0i

How do/ did you & your moms planets 'battle & love'

InLight,
KristaBack to top
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ObliqueEx Member

Re: My Mother, Myself« Reply #1 - on: 26.12.2009 at 15:20 [UT] »thanks, kristanow i have another 5 years of therapy to undertake from this question:
in a nutshell:
my mom's CGm directly n my mars: any time i express my excitement, i hear things like: "well, enjoy it while
it lasts, because there's shit just around the corner". she is a dark cloud looming above me, waiting to rain on
my parade.
her Jm my E: when i'm expressing anger over something, she has to remind me that her problems are worse
than mine and that i should "get a grip"
my feelings have ALWAYS been minimized by her - always bringing the topic of conversation back to HER lifeand how she has had REAL reason to be upset.
she suffers from narcissistic personality disorder and some other form of schizophrenia. it's always been about
her when i talk about me.
when she doesn't like what i'm saying, she hangs up the phone on me. there have been months on-end when
she won't talk to me because i confronted her with my feelings about these types of things.
in essence - my mother has consistently denied my feelings throughout my life. i have never felt safe with her.
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Ross/Saxony/
Ex Member

Re: My Mother, Myself« Reply #2 - on: 26.12.2009 at 16:06 [UT] »In general, I have a good relationship with my mother.
Conjunctions ( my planet m her planet):
AC m Ceres

JmG
OmB
ImE
BmK
CmC
Dm part of fortune
EmA
KmD
N m MCMC m Fpart of fortune m O
Ceres m D
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Krista ShippMember

Re: My Mother, Myself« Reply #3 - on: 26.12.2009 at 18:49 [UT] »Oblique- I idolized my mother..
When I look at our planets in black & white above- notice her Jm
my A (in my 1st house )... Was that where some harshness towards
me came from / ( I blinded myself to it ) or her Gm my OmE ??
Posts: 15841
Gender:I can identiify with the minimization you speak of..
~~ always pointing out a model who was prettier in the shoot;'enjoy it now'- Why do all these men pursue you ??- etc <subtle>etc
She was definitely the boss
She is gone a few years now & it is only recently I am admitting some harsh truths to myself... I'd say I feelguilty even thinking these things- but I don't.. She taught me guilt was a useless emotion
I appreciate your opinion...

Krista- likely a TherapistsJackpot,....
Yet- she was a hoot !
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solostyle
Member

Re: My Mother, Myself« Reply #4 - on: 26.12.2009 at 19:15 [UT] »another thanks, krista.
not that i need therapy for mom issues right away, but this forum has been therapy
oblique i'm so sorry.. that sounds like such a drain. mothers have such a wonderful role they can play in theirkids lives .. she isn't taking advantage of that! it almost sounds like with the J m your E that there's somekarmic connection.. you both needing to interact and work this out. do you have any aspects with your nodes?
Pretty cool:
Posts: 341

Mom's K m my E, orb 2 degrees
My K m her E, orb 4 degrees
I think it means we need each other to fully express each of our creative E energy.
Mom's J rx n my C .. ouch..
Mom's G rx m my DC, South Node, and O ... yikes.. WHY?!?!
Mom's I m my J .. interesting!
Mom's J rx p my I .. also interesting!
Mom's C o my D, p my F, q my A and M
Those are the notables. In general our relationship has gotten better since I moved out. Nay, even in the final
years of high school it wasn't so bad. The best thing that ever happened between us was in either 9th or 10th
grade when I taught her to not hit me as a form of discipline. After that it was much easier living with her.. she
was much more lenient and trusted me. But it was quite stormy before that point. I mean I hated her! Thesedays I think the cultural gap divides us a bit, and I have yet to see what she'll think when I'm more settled laterin our lives.

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solostyleMember

Re: My Mother, Myself« Reply #5 - on: 26.12.2009 at 19:21 [UT] »Quote from Krista Shipp on 26.12.2009 at 18:49 [UT]:
She is gone a few years now & it is only recently I am admitting some harsh truths to myself... I'd say I feel guilty even thinking thesethings- but I don't.. She taught me guilt was a useless emotion

Ah.. this is great! My mom taught me guilt was the only useful emotion. (to use for controlling others.)

Posts: 341

Then when she grew up around when I was in high school, I had to relearn everything because now all of asudden guilt was not very useful anymore.
I'm still not over it!! I know rationally it's a silly thing to feel, completely gets you nowhere, but I still feel itsometimes. Or feel guilty for not feeling guilty. Bah!
i hate manipulation of any kind. She would still use it now and again. Whoa I completely forgot to mention
that. Manipulation was her key tactic!

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Krista ShippMember

Re: My Mother, Myself« Reply #6 - on: 26.12.2009 at 19:32 [UT] »Thats a tough one- Solo- a big HUG to you...
( those thoughts stick in the mind like crazy glue)

KristaPosts: 15841
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Oblique

Ex Member

Re: My Mother, Myself« Reply #7 - on: 27.12.2009 at 01:42 [UT] »on positive note - my mom ADE i and Bc gave me my love of language and humor. She just had her
80th birthday, and while i browsed tens upon tens of sappy cards (shrugging, groaning, moaning) trying to findsomething that matched my true feelings - i found the perfect card: outside "only the good die young" - on theinside, "bitches like us live forever."she loved it!
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Krista ShippMember

Re: My Mother, Myself« Reply #8 - on: 27.12.2009 at 02:03 [UT] »Oblique- Differences or not- you are SO fortunate to still have her..

Truly,

KristaPosts: 15841
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Matrika Matters

Member

Re: My Mother, Myself« Reply #9 - on: 27.12.2009 at 02:48 [UT] »Quote from Krista Shipp on 27.12.2009 at 02:03 [UT]:
Oblique- Differences or not- you are SO fortunate to still have her..Truly

Posts: 7405

I agree with this, from my own experience, simply because in my own relationship with my mother (who is 84
now) things have finally, only in the last few years, moved along.
I have natal G n her A and she has the same natal G aspect to my A...for years we experienced each otheras constraining (from my perspective at least). She heaped scorn on me, completely unconsciously I am sure.
When I got a really fabulous job, looking back her comment was "Well, I didn't have your looks", implying that
I got the job not with my brain but because I was good looking, whereas she had achieved her successes with
her intelligence.
I lived overseas for a few decades, in part I am sure to avoid her. When I returned I was determined to glean
the positives from our relationship before she dies...I went off to a Jungian therapist, who was a delight...hedied unfortunately mid-therapy while I was still very resentful of her. What I've managed to do in theintervening years is get to see her more as a person and less as my mother. This has been helped by her aging
and increasing frailty...and her memory loss.
Now she is in aged care and I am very grateful to "still have her" because I am aware and in touch with just how
much I love her. She's lost her hard edge, what is left is very lovable.
It's a difficult relationship for a lot of mothers and daughters. The book with the title of the thread My Mother
Myself by Nancy Friday is a good start for anyone still struggling with their mother stuff.
Oblique, I could relate to the card story...I could have got the same card for my mother and she would havebeen delighted too.
Astrology has been incredibly helpful to me in understanding my relationship with my mother better. It took
me out of the feelings of resentment I had for her (I thought) poor parenting and allowed me to look at thevery real stresses that were so obviously just... there. It also gave me the distance from our story to "get" herand what she is about outside of our mother /daughter relationship.
She is a person who had an extremely difficult childhood who has turned her own pain into understanding (anda resource) and used it to help many people. I know bad therapy is awful, but good therapy helped me to getpast my resentments and in touch with the love I feel and actually have a positive relationship with mymother...that is kind of a miracle with the AnG we have from/to each other in synastry. When I saw that
aspect, it put most everything into perspective for me.
Now with transiting J in my 8H and squaring T G I am more grateful than ever to have got myself throughthose resentments I used to feel. I am amazed as I write this cause it is not so long ago I was really struggling
with it all and going on retreats to meditate and trying just about whatever...progress happens.

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Krista ShippMember

Re: My Mother, Myself« Reply #10 - on: 27.12.2009 at 03:01 [UT] »Matrika- So beautifully put~~~welling up

kristaPosts: 15841
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Candlewick

Ex Member

Re: My Mother, Myself« Reply #11 - on: 27.12.2009 at 05:39 [UT] »I, also, think of my mother as a saint. We had a great relationship and I feel totally blessed. She died last year,
but she's still very much alive in my mind and heart. Our relationship was extremely mentally stimulating. I justnoticed in doing this exercise that we each had our NN conjunct the other's Mercury. I know she was not
perfect. She would have been a better mother if she had been a little more affectionate, but I never doubted
that she loved me. I also wish she had not made me wash so many dishes. But I never, ever lost respect or love
for my mother, and she never let me down. Not once. She was totally supportive at all times and always let meknow that she had faith in me to make the right choices. Really, my relationship with my mother was one of thegreatest blessings of my life.
MotherMe

AC 01 d
A6 b

16 a
18 b

B3 e
C 28 aD 18 aE 14 lF 21 aG18 i
O5 a
I 26 eJ 15 dNK 10 cN5 b
Vx 18 h

05 g
10 c
24 b
07 b
02 k
29 e
28 c
13 g
14 e
26 a
07 i

07 g

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EarthandAir
Member

Re: My Mother, Myself« Reply #12 - on: 27.12.2009 at 07:18 [UT] »My mother was a Gemini, Taurus rising, Aries moon. I'm a Libra, capricorn rising, scorpio moon. She terrorized
my brother and I, had tantrums, went into vindictive fits, plotted revenge, was resentful, competitive, andoften paranoid. She told her close friends that I had serious mental issues. She used to get me alone and justcrucify me emotionally; selfish, unstable, lazy, etc. She had no sympathy or empathy for me and would
especially harass or punish me if anyone around me said anything complimentary or empathetic about me inher presence.
Posts: 800

I had a hard time making intimate connections or forming friendships or really connecting to anyone outside
the family because I never knew how I'd be punished for it, or how she would work to make sure I was
disconnected again. She hated it when I had a boyfriend, said strangely accusing things about my closefriends. I am not sure now if she really hated me or if she was mentally ill, but I know her life must have been
extremely hard and the desolate landscape she needed to create for me in my life was the one she felt she hadin her own.
However, she was also brilliant and hardworking and tough. No one knew her like I did. I was the one who wasat her bedside in her last moments; and while she was dying I was the only one allowed in her presence. She
was a force in this world, raised two kids alone, and made a success of her life. Except, it would seem, for me.

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Michelle

Ex Member

Re: My Mother, Myself« Reply #13 - on: 27.12.2009 at 08:04 [UT] »My mother and I were the very best of friends - her F exactly on my B.

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CranberryMember

Re: My Mother, Myself« Reply #14 - on: 27.12.2009 at 10:42 [UT] »Hi Michelle... I know what you mean. My Mom's Moon sign is my Moon sign. We just 'understood' each other.
Her Moon was also conjunct my South Node, and trine my Jupiter, Mars and Neptune... I remember only
unconditional love. She took my Mars and encouraged me in every way to be myself and go after my dreams.
I know beyond a shadow of a doubt, she would have sacrificed herself to make her children's dreams cometrue. My Jupiter conjuncts my IC... she defo made home a place where there was happiness and warmth. Her
Venus was also conjunct my AC.
My Mother is my role model... the one woman on earth I strive to be like. Not a day goes by, that I don't thankGod she was my Mother.

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IP LoggedLampedusa

Member

Re: My Mother, Myself« Reply #15 - on: 27.12.2009 at 13:50 [UT] »I don't know my Mother's birth time, only the date... Emotionally, she is an extremely cold person, has nevershowed any physical affection to me or anyone else. Kisses? Forget it - you get 4 kisses a year: 2 for yourbirthday and 2 for NY. Hugs? What is that?
I am not joking nor exaggerating, she has been like this my entire life (i.e. 35 years). Needless to say, my father

Posts: 222
Gender:is exactly the same in terms of emotions (but a g, also no birthtime), plus an alcoholic and physically andverbally aggressive. Luckily, I don't live with them anymore and am in psychotherapy to deal with it all.... They
will never ever change. None of them has ever praised anything I have achieved, let alone me, myself. They areboth extremely critical - I'm a zero in their eyes.
Mother is a champion in manipulation - she has made me feel guilty (for being alive, I think?) and constantly
makes herself look like the sacrificing saint. The only "love" she has ever given to me was providing for mematerially - i.e. the basics. We have always had enough money to live comfortably, but both have always beenvery stingy. If I wanted some nice clothes or anything else, I had to go with my head through the wall to get it,
as in arguments, not speaking, shouting.. what not. I did eventually get the thing, but the emotional price wastoo high... Plus, she made me feel guilty for it afterwards, would bring up what she bought me for months, toshow me what a saint she is and how she sacrifices herself for me, the ungrateful child (in her eyes)..
Mother is eA, and I tried with various times of the day to see what signs her B goes into - but it's d for 3
birth times and all the rest e - wtf?
If I look up a eA, it says very warm and affectionate.. Cancer also but she is NONE of that. I'm a dB in 8th... I don't know what birth time to choose to see our synastry. I
mean, I know fully well what our relationship is like, I am just curious if there is anything in the stars, too.
Those of you who have good relationships with your mothers, you don't know how blessed you have been inthis life

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Oblique
Ex Member

Re: My Mother, Myself« Reply #16 - on: 27.12.2009 at 15:22 [UT] »Matrika - since we both share similar astrological points, I know you do understand. I have done a lot of "work"around my mother, but I can never seem to shake my (Ed) resentments and determination to get her to SEE
where I'm coming from, in essence, to "get" me. My sister and I have had long discussions about this and thefact of our mom's mental illness, which makes it all but impossible for her to come to compromise. My motherand I can sit together for hours, smoking cigarettes, talking about Astrology, playing scrabble and talking
about her life and loves, which I get great pleasure from. She loves to cook for me (NOW) whereas when I wasa child - it was T.V. dinners and such much of my childhood. She was overwhelmed by her life and abuse andher philosophy about me was that as long as "MeAnnie" can take care of herself, she has nothing to worry
about. I truly had to start taking care of myself, as well as her, when I was 7 and she suffered a fractured leg.
Laundry, cooking and housekeeping. I became an excellent cook, laundress and housekeeper because of it!
Still, I have to steel myself each time I see her. I have to think about what I will and won't talk with her about.
And I'm always on guard for her "shut downs." Even at 48 (almost 49), I still fear her emotional abandonment,even though most of our emotional relationship has been toxic for me.
There is longevity in her family line (her mom lived to 96, her father to 92). On her birthday, I told her "mayyou live another 10 years to torment me..."Back to top
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Lampedusa

Member

Re: My Mother, Myself« Reply #17 - on: 27.12.2009 at 15:36 [UT] »Quote from Oblique on 27.12.2009 at 15:22 [UT]:
Even at 48 (almost 49), I still fear her emotional abandonment, even though most of our emotional relationship has been toxic for me.

That's the d thing, been told this is the most typical d defence - me and my mother, don't take her awayfrom me, however bad our relationship is.... I have dB and despite all the toxicity between us, I still feel I am
Posts: 222
Gender:attached to her and fear the day when she has to leave this world. It's like we speak once or twice a month, fora very short time, are not in any contact otherwise, no empathy or warmth between us.. but I just want her tobe alive, to be somewhere there, not to abandon me (as if she hadn't abandoned me enough yet!). It's insane
to feel this bizarre loyalty, isn't it...

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Re: My Mother, Myself« Reply #18 - on: 27.12.2009 at 15:55 [UT] »Quote from Cranberry on 27.12.2009 at 10:42 [UT]:
Hi Michelle... I know what you mean. My Mom's Moon sign is my Moon sign. We just 'understood' each other. Her Moon was also conjunctmy South Node, and trine my Jupiter, Mars and Neptune... I remember only unconditional love. She took my Mars and encouraged me inevery way to be myself and go after my dreams. I know beyond a shadow of a doubt, she would have sacrificed herself to make her
children's dreams come true. My Jupiter conjuncts my IC... she defo made home a place where there was happiness and warmth. Her
Venus was also conjunct my AC.
My Mother is my role model... the one woman on earth I strive to be like. Not a day goes by, that I don't thank God she was my Mother.

Cran,
Ditto, I'm very grateful for my mother. She had a lot of integrity and gave good guidance. She wasn't thetype to bake cookies or pack our lunch for school, but my brother and I were her top priority.
We were adopted. She always made a big point of telling us that she couldn't love us more even if she had
given birth to us. My D and my brother's A were on her dJK.
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Oblique

Ex Member

Re: My Mother, Myself« Reply #19 - on: 27.12.2009 at 16:14 [UT] »more unfolding....
Astrology. I was 17 when it "took" - however, I was probably 4 or 5 when I can remember being exposed to it.
My mom had this friend named "Margie" who was a jet black haired, bleached platinum vixen. They would get
together on weekends and my mom would dip toothbrushes in hair bleach to do Margie's roots. During this 4hour or so female bonding episode, I would hang on my mothers lap, listening to them talk about Quincunxes,
Eclipses, Moon conjunct Satan, etc. Years and years of this until I was 17 and bought my first astrology book(almost 32 years ago). A legacy. My mother is a highly intelligent woman. When she taught me to playscrabble when I was 11, everytime I said "what is that?!" to a word, she'd say smugly, "look it up?" I learned
how to spell and read a dictionary because of that. Today, I excel at Scrabble, though the old goat-ess can stillkick my ass! My mother was never the June Cleaver or Carol Brady mom that I dreamed about. She was a bit
more Kitty from Gunsmoke or Zsa Zsa. But she molded my brain - critical thinking. Which pisses her off, now,
when I challenge her Uber-Democrat politics and talk about middle ground. Can't live with her, can't live
without her...
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Krista ShippMember

Re: My Mother, Myself« Reply #20 - on: 27.12.2009 at 19:49 [UT] »I think my NF on her NDa is what made me dote on her, spoil her- etc..
It was my privilege~~~~jeez- it seems we Ed are a tad 'different' ( goofed up)
Posts: 15841
Gender:KristaIts not true that Time heals all pain
You acclimate because you have to- imo

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Charts for SaleEx Member

Re: My Mother, Myself« Reply #21 - on: 27.12.2009 at 23:54 [UT] »KristaImJ happend in c, not in e...
So the position of J or I will be wrong
Although I'm born 6/25 and she is born 6/26, I don't understand her... I have a Bf and she has a Bh...
She's all the time intense while I try to be relaxed, utterly cool & calm... I like myself more when I'm notaround her
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Matrika Matters
Member

Re: My Mother, Myself« Reply #22 - on: 28.12.2009 at 17:32 [UT] »Oblique Quote:Matrika - since we both share similar astrological points, I know you do understand. I have done a lot of "work" around my mother, but I
can never seem to shake my () resentments and determination to get her to SEE where I'm coming from, in essence, to "get" me. My
sister and I have had long discussions about this and the fact of our mom's mental illness, which makes it all but impossible for her tocome to compromise.

Posts: 7405

It is such a primal relationship that it is completely understandable that we have strong feelings and (some ofus) conflicts about our mothers. So much of all this is operating at an unconscious level that it can seemendless and impossible to resolve. It's not impossible, but for sure if the relationship has been difficult, it isnecessary to let go. Other people don't change...we change how we respond to them and how we interact with
our memories if we need to. One of the fundamentals of Buddhism is that attachment creates suffering. That is
not to say don't love someone...but if you get attached to how they will be or attached to changing them oreven attached to the pain in your relationship...you will suffer.
For me what it took to get past the painful attachment in my relationship with my mother was finding a good
female therapist, working at it, and doing a lot of meditation retreats of the no-talking variety (so that I could
get completely in touch with what was inside me and not escape from it into my head).
I don't know what other people need, but that is what it took for me. That plus really then working at forgiving
and letting go of resentments and past hurts.
Sometimes if the balance is too strongly weighted in the direction of suffering, I think it isn't helpful to try tohave a relationship with some parents. I know that is heresy, but I do believe there are some people who arejust destructive and hurtful. I tried but had to let go of my father, I couldn't have a healthy relationship withhim. Mostly our parents don't change, especially if they are mentally ill. Alcoholics who continue drinking in myopinion can't be related to healthily for example. Everyone has the possibility of change, it is there for all of us,
parents too, but it takes as much work for them to change as it does for us...change takes a lot of work!
It is a whole lot easier for me to change the childhood inside me than to look for it from my mother who has
her own limitations due to her own experiences.
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Lampedusa

Member

Re: My Mother, Myself« Reply #23 - on: 28.12.2009 at 22:00 [UT] »You put it very lovely, Matrika
I agree about mindful meditation and finding a female therapist to work through the motherly issues - I havemy own female psychotherapist... No matter how much our friends may love us and how much understanding
they can show us, certain issues can - IMO - only be resolved in psychotherapy. It is a real challenge to find atherapist you click with, as someone may be a good therapist, but he or she may simply not be the one foryou.. but when you do, confusion does begin to dissipate and things start falling into place...
Posts: 222
Gender:Funny you mention Buddhism - I in no way think I have any profound idea about it, nor do I intend to startliving the Buddhist way or anything like that... but I find it very intriguing, because it goes so much against allof my fears and insecurities - my fearful attachments, my need for safety and security (no matter in what odd
and unsuitable places I look for them).. There is one author I really like, she is a Buddhist nun.. Pema Chodron.
She writes beautfully and has wonderful audio books available, too... Two of the ideas she talks about arehopelessness (as in, not building false hopes which lead to despair) and groundlessness (as in not attachingyourself). I find her ideas very refreshing, but still very difficult to grasp...
Btw, Buddhism is very k in terms of non-attachment, don't you think?
Quote from Matrika on 28.12.2009 at 17:32 [UT]:Sometimes if the balance is too strongly weighted in the direction of suffering, I think it isn't helpful to try to have a relationship withsome parents. I know that is heresy, but I do believe there are some people who are just destructive and hurtful....It is a whole lot easierfor me to change the childhood inside me than to look for it from my mother who has her own limitations due to her own experiences.

I agree...on my way there, slowly but surely...
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Matrika Matters
Member

Re: My Mother, Myself« Reply #24 - on: 30.12.2009 at 17:57 [UT] »Lampudesa Quote:...on my way there, slowly but surely...

Posts: 7405

You know the saying...slow and steady wins the race...
Quote:
Btw, Buddhism is very

k in terms of non-attachment, don't you think?

I can see why you would think that, it does seem very k ideal.
Gautama Buddha was a Ab
I will post a link I've got that may make that more meaningful. It's long but gets more interesting as it goesalong.
http://www.astrologyforthesoul.com/moses/taurholist.html
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Jane DavisEx Member

Re: My Mother, Myself« Reply #25 - on: 24.02.2010 at 15:09 [UT] »I am so heavily Cancerian that I was always going to expect and need a lot of emotional support from Mom.
My mother liked younger children - babies and toddlers -Ultimately, she was only interested in my father, who'rescued' her from her unhappy family. She made it very clear that we came a very poor second. I was mostly
used by her as an unpaid counsellor, which is why I've avoided going into that line of work. In our charts there
is a sun pluto conjuction and her saturn opposite my sun. She was very jealous of my intellect.
It became clear to me as I got older and saw a lot of parents in my work that she had the rather peculiar ideathat it is the child's duty to show affection to the parent - she didn't seem to understand that, initially at least,
it is the other way round.
Me and my brother ended up looking after her in her final illness. I did my best with this but was certainly
incapable of showing her any genuine affection. I could look after her because that is what I'd always done. It
was my first boyfriend, from a very dysfunctional family himself but quite perceptive when he was in control
who pointed out that my mother was narcissistic. It was a bit of a relief because I had thought myself to be acold and ungrateful daughter.
I tend not to want to bother with people who treat me badly or with disrespect.

The fact that she was mymother made no difference to this. I don't believe in biology or blood ties and I think I generally get on wellwith certain older women who I would have liked to have as a mother. I think you can 'adopt' a parent at any
time in your life if you haven't experienced loving parenting; it might be a therapist but others can perform thisfunction too.
It was always impossible to talk to her about the effect her behaviour had: she was incapable of taking criticism. I did feel sorry for her because she was often trapped in the past and did not value herself as an individual.
My father, although caring, was a bit of a sexist and did nothing to help her expand her horizons. She was hismommy and that was how he liked it.
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EyesisEx Member

Re: My Mother, Myself« Reply #26 - on: 24.02.2010 at 16:25 [UT] »Quote from Krista Shipp on 26.12.2009 at 18:49 [UT]:
Oblique- I idolized my mother..
When I look at our planets in black & white above- notice hermyJm

A (in my 1st house )... Was that where some harshness towards

me came from / ( I blinded myself to it ) or her

Gm my OmE ??

I can identiify with the minimization you speak of..
~~ always pointing out a model who was prettier in the shoot;'enjoy it now'- Why do all these men pursue you ??- etc <subtle>etc
She was definitely the boss
She is gone a few years now & it is only recently I am admitting some harsh truths to myself... I'd say I feel guilty even thinking thesethings- but I don't.. She taught me guilt was a useless emotion
I appreciate your opinion...

Krista- likely a TherapistsJackpot,....
Yet- she was a hoot !

All your Water responded to her Scorpio Moon.
You had to Idealize Somethingin your Life. Without that Ideal, you would have collapsed.
Moon in Scorpio can be a harsh cold place which made her needs a bit more important than others. (My sisterhas that same Moon)
But she had to cope with so much other things and her needs were either ignored, or patronized.
In our Mothers we seek refuge
In our Mothers we find ourselves
She gave you tools to help cope (Don't feel guilt)
She didn't have One child to care for, She had two
You sweetie; were her Anchor.
I understand the Blindness.
Please go back to the Difficult Childhood and read my last posts there.

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Krista ShippMember

Re: My Mother, Myself« Reply #27 - on: 25.02.2010 at 00:25 [UT] »Today is her birthday((((((((you))))))

KristaPosts: 15841
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Uranusin11th
Ex Member

Re: My Mother, Myself« Reply #28 - on: 25.02.2010 at 00:32 [UT] »Quote from Krista Shipp on 25.02.2010 at 00:25 [UT]:Today is her birthday((((((((you))))))

KristaInteresting. My mom's birthday was on Sunday (the 21st).
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venusinlibra

Member

Re: My Mother, Myself« Reply #29 - on: 25.02.2010 at 00:58 [UT] »Krista today is my moms birthday also
and I'm very sorry for your loss..

R.I.P

And for the thread..
My mom and I have a good relationship..but she is a manipulative woman..
I love her so much I dont want to hurt her..never..but sometimes I do..
Her B in c exactly n my B and p my libra stellium..these are nice..
Posts: 964
Gender:our difficult aspects are my I o her A,her J o my C,CoC..
communication is not easy between us..she is so sensitive and I become very defensive..

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Gamma Rhea
Member

Re: My Mother, Myself« Reply #30 - on: 25.02.2010 at 05:31 [UT] »My first housei O is her E. This conjunct my asc and opposite my cN. Physical and mental abuse over theyears? Ding, ding. I had to give up trying.

Posts: 225
Gender:« Last Edit: 26.02.2010 at 00:16 [UT] by Gamma Rhea »Back to top

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Krista ShippMember

Re: My Mother, Myself« Reply #31 - on: 25.02.2010 at 06:51 [UT] »VenusInLibra...Enjoy each day you have together & I hope you have many, many

They will not come again
Posts: 15841
Gender:A Daughter,
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EyesisEx Member

Re: My Mother, Myself« Reply #32 - on: 25.02.2010 at 14:01 [UT] »Moms does this to my
A i o Af p Asce p Oe

B hs Ba exact, o Asc m I h sJ
Whoaaaaaaaa
I am stopping here. She is part of my Yod.
My Mother My Heart My should have been my best friend.
My Mother My Dance Partner, My Music Teacher
Chocolates keeping me out of school so we could play.
Cartoons draped over the crib so I could enjoy andParagoric for my belly. Escape and do the blues circuit up the ole Miss was our dream.
My Mother Took the Beating for my accidently breaking something
My Mother Talked to me Like a Grown UP
She and I shared Many Secrets of the Heart.
I could call her out on the Abuse I saw her Inner Anguish and Suffering
I carried Her Pain (her F m my N k)
I was the Eye that saw her end I am the only One who Knows or cares.
I got my talent my genius my goodness my compassion
She may have done somethings a little harsh but Mr. Pluto Dad beat her and laid so much on her.
She never had the chance to Fly
Damn, here I go baring myself. I must be having to deal with this or it would not be going on.
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Mockblumen

Member

Re: My Mother, Myself« Reply #33 - on: 25.02.2010 at 18:46 [UT] »Kitty from Gunsmoke? They don't make women like that anymore.
My Mom's Chiron conjuncted my Sun. She was always trying to improve me, and I failed her. We lost her overthe holidays. Her Neptune conjuncted my Pluto - not sure what that meant. She never had the chance to fly,but a reaction set in. I had Moon exalted - I did respect her. But we were born in opposite Chinese year's sign
- there were real differences. I feel most bad for my Dad because he lost his best friend.

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EyesisEx Member

Re: My Mother, Myself« Reply #34 - on: 25.02.2010 at 19:00 [UT] »Quote from Mockblumen on 25.02.2010 at 18:46 [UT]:Kitty from Gunsmoke? They don't make women like that anymore.
My Mom's Chiron conjuncted my Sun. She was always trying to improve me, and I failed her. We lost her over the holidays. Her Neptune
conjuncted my Pluto - not sure what that meant. She never had the chance to fly, but a reaction set in. I had Moon exalted - I did respect
her. But we were born in opposite Chinese year's sign - there were real differences. I feel most bad for my Dad because he lost his bestfriend.

Oh Man!!! You never failed her, she just wanted to make sure she never failed you.
Yes the differences are real and true, but maybe she saw more of herself in you than she may have wanted toadmit.
She did understand your deepest self, that is what her Neptune and your Pluto were about.
Oppositions of any kind are Reflections of what we are Deep Inside Mockblumen.
My most sincere condolences to you and your Father.
I too had loss over the Holidays years ago, be there for your Dad. He will need you then more than now.
Thanx for that picture of Kitty. That is how I shall remember her.
My Kitty My Mom, she was something very special. She had issues but she sparkled and shined even during the
Worst of it.
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Krista ShippMember

Re: My Mother, Myself« Reply #35 - on: 25.02.2010 at 20:56 [UT] »A trine is no guarantee of an unbroken good part of Life..
My sainted mom- was a child raised very comfortably..
She had hBpGdpAl- all early degrees
Her mother died when my mom was 18- on her own 42nd birthday- Aug 5
Posts: 15841
Gender:

The father & brothers deserted the 5 girls- ran off with a woman
The eldest got married & my mom had to raise the three- one 16, one 13, & one 11 at the time..
I gather they were very very hard years & my mom did not start to 'live' until the youngest married at 19..
Way before she became ill- around 2001- she became 'my child'- birthday parties, abundant shiny Christmases,
easter baskets, shopping sprees etc..
Despite her no nonsense exterior- I could see her melt into these & love them
She developed a love for electronic toys ( Furbies, etc )- got on a kick of 'Wishbone' the dog who could readand talk
I remember 3 days before xmas in the early 90's- being in huge toy stores looking for the 'Wishbone' dog..
I had to 'clip it' out of someone elses cart- they were sold out...
(hey- life's tough)My point is- she was the middle of seven children & in those days
things like parties etc. fell by the wayside for businesses- etc
I like to think she got back some of what she missed very youngBeing the one doted on
It was truly my privlege~~~~~~rest with the angels

KristaThe things we do for love

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Member

Re: My Mother, Myself« Reply #36 - on: 25.02.2010 at 21:11 [UT] »My mom and I get along pretty well..
we both have g Asc.
Mom

Posts: 1859

Al
Bk
Ck
Dj
Ee
Fl
Gk
Of
Ih
Jf

me

Aa
Bd
Cl
Da
Ei
Fl
Gi
Oi
Ij
Jh

Mostly I dislike her k BC because she can be very cold and distant at times, she is not great at being warm
and affectionate, growing up with her as a single mother she was the only person I had for that. We also very
very much disagree when it comes to love and relationships.. she is all about working hard at it and it is a
responsibility and you have to make compromises and its ok if there is no longer any passion etc etc..
We both have a singleton planet our tenth house so career is important to both of us, mine is the bucket of myhandle, hers the only fire sign.

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IP Loggedleigha9

Member

Re: My Mother, Myself« Reply #37 - on: 25.02.2010 at 21:12 [UT] »Quote from Uranusin11th on 25.02.2010 at 00:32 [UT]:
Quote from Krista Shipp on 25.02.2010 at 00:25 [UT]:Today is her birthday((((((((you))))))

Posts: 1859

KristaInteresting. My mom's birthday was on Sunday (the 21st).

Mine too.. weird
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EyesisEx Member

Re: My Mother, Myself« Reply #38 - on: 26.02.2010 at 01:24 [UT] »Quote from Krista Shipp on 25.02.2010 at 20:56 [UT]:A trine is no guarantee of an unbroken good part of Life..
My sainted mom- was a child raised very comfortably..
She hadhBpGdpAl- all early degrees

Her mother died when my mom was 18- on her own 42nd birthday- Aug 5
The father & brothers deserted the 5 girls- ran off with a woman
The eldest got married & my mom had to raise the three- one 16, one 13, & one 11 at the time..
I gather they were very very hard years & my mom did not start to 'live' until the youngest married at 19..
Way before she became ill- around 2001- she became 'my child'- birthday parties, abundant shiny Christmases, easter baskets, shopping
sprees etc..
Despite her no nonsense exterior- I could see her melt into these & love them
She developed a love for electronic toys ( Furbies, etc )- got on a kick of 'Wishbone' the dog who could read and talkI remember 3 days before xmas in the early 90's- being in huge toy stores looking for the 'Wishbone' dog..
I had to 'clip it' out of someone elses cart- they were sold out...
(hey- life's tough)My point is- she was the middle of seven children & in those days
things like parties etc. fell by the wayside for businesses- etc
I like to think she got back some of what she missed very youngBeing the one doted on
It was truly my privlege~~~~~~rest with the angels

KristaThe things we do for love

Sure!! I couldn't see ya doing any less!!
You let her be the Baby Girl for a piece of her Life.
That is the best of Love. Oh Man I can't imagine how happy you made her.
No Trines don't always mean Ease.
That just blows me away!!
Its's that lB
Furbies!!!!
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caplady

Member

Re: My Mother, Myself« Reply #39 - on: 26.02.2010 at 05:04 [UT] »I can live without my mother.
My stellium is in between her Cap sun and mercury.
She has Neptune, Jupiter, Mars and possibly the moon in Virgo. Weird some of those trine my stellium. I think
Posts: 400

the problem is her Pluto opposes that stellium.
Her Neptune conjuncts my ASC, nn Pluto.
Opposite nodal positions conjunct. My Pluto con her sn.
Her Uranus in Aries squares stellium opp sign to moon but too wide. She annoys me especially when she tells
me what to do or tells me it would make her happy if I rang her.
I never ring my mother, because I don't like her. I don't feel duty bound to her at all. My Aries sister does that.
My cancer sister has probably not spoken to her for 30 years maybe longer. I talk(better to just listen), to her
if she rings me about twice per year (too many). I did visit her a few months ago because my brother was in
town.
Very critical and you can't get a straight answer from her. What's for dinner? Poison!
Apparently she had horrible parents and she brought up 6 children by herself. Didn't feel love as a child fromher. But I don't care anymore, I don't feel any loss. Could be worse, could have a controlling mother.
I have that mars in cancer as well - lot's of resentment - doesn't help with moon in Libra - it's all unfair. Moon isafflicted square to Mars and sq to stellium but not T square.
My Aries daughter has a Aq moon con Jup con Vx (also sq mars) and it breaks my heart that she is notaffectionate. Fortunately my son makes up for it.

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EyesisEx Member

Re: My Mother, Myself« Reply #40 - on: 26.02.2010 at 08:56 [UT] »caplady, hopefully you and your Mom can make a bridge and maybe the resentments can work out and away.
Some of us never got the chance to even build resentments.
I lost my mother when I was 6 due to violence.
I miss her very much and wonder about how different my life would have been with her.
When she died the Love in my life died with her so I have my dreams.
Cappys do have a way of burying the bone.
Be careful that bone has a funny way of being unearthed later in life.
That is my concern for my Cappy brother.
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caplady

Member

Re: My Mother, Myself« Reply #41 - on: 28.02.2010 at 06:04 [UT] »Thank you for your concern. I did have a good look at the bone through psychotherapy 15 years ago and havedone other stuff as well. She drains my energy and is defensive, not good for my health.

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