I D E A BRI EF / EV E NT INSIGHTS

Compassionate Leadership:
How to Do Hard Things in a
Human Way

Compassionate Leadership:
How to Do Hard Things in a
Human WayPRESENTER:

Rasmus Hougaard, Author, and Founder and CEO of Potential Project
MODERATOR:Angela Gest-McCall, Senior Moderator and Leadership Coach, Corporate Learning, Harvard
Business Publishing

Overview
Being an effective leader who can drive teams to strong results requires giving tough feedback andmaking hard decisions that may dishearten employees. Given that reality, business leaders must
be able to demonstrate compassion as they lead teams in an increasingly stressful world. Beyond
the benefits of engendering trust and loyalty, studies have found that compassionate leaders areperceived as stronger and more competent. However, it is important to recognize that empathy
alone is not sufficient—authentic compassion requires intentional action to alleviate problematicsituations.
Compassionate leadership results in mutual growth and encourages leaders to take care ofthemselves and their people. Leaders are encouraged to approach thorny situations by being present,
courageous, direct, and transparent to be most effective in leading with compassion.

Context
Rasmus Hougaard, author, and founder and CEO of Potential Project, discussed the importance ofleaders showing compassion toward their teams. He shared valuable and practical steps to help
leaders appreciate and engage in compassionate leadership.

Key Takeaways
It is imperative for leaders to be compassionate.
Now more than ever, amid the environmental confluence of a global pandemic, growing
unemployment, and civil and political unrest, compassionate leaders and leadership are essential.

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THE ABOVE ILLUSTRATION WAS CREATED FOR THE 2021 EMEA PARTNERS’ MEETING.

Today’s leaders must connect with empathy, lead with compassion, and incorporate courage and carein their personal leadership style. Compassion in leadership refers to leaders having the intention
to be of benefit to the people under their stewardship. Demonstrating compassion with employees
advances collaboration, boosts levels of trust, and strengthens loyalty. Moreover, in a rapidly
fluctuating work environment in which colleagues often interact virtually, there is a swelling need tobe thoughtful and intentional in signaling compassion more explicitly.
In these evolving times of crisis and global transformation, ambiguity and uncertainty take hold andemployees feel more emotionally exposed and vulnerable. Leaders who make known that they havetheir employees’ backs reassure employees and offer them an opportunity to adjust and acclimate to
major shifts in workplace norms.

Leaders must focus equally on care and execution—and find an equilibrium
between the two.
It is imperative to connect with employees by empathizing with them—feeling what they are feeling.
However, empathy alone is not sufficient. Leaders must move from empathy to compassion.
•Empathy involves sharing the suffering—an emotion.

•Compassion seeks to alleviate that suffering—an intention.

The two differ from both a psychological and neurological perspective and manifest in distinct
segments of the brain.

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Created for Harvard Business Publishing Corporate Learning by BullsEye Resources www.bullseyeresources.com.

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IDEA BRIEF / EVENT INSIGHTS
When people empathize with others, they often assume that emotion and experience the distressthemselves, which can lead to burnout. Moreover, because humans are primitively inclined toempathize with those who look like them or bring similar life experiences to bear, leaders tend to
inadvertently draw natural perimeters.
Leading with compassion and not just empathy, however, gives leaders a sense of empowerment,
control, and sustainable action, in turn generating a stronger social connection and greatercontentment.
This does not mean that leaders must solve every problem. In many cases, the most important action
when moving into compassion is to do nothing but to be present. Ask questions, demonstrate true
understanding, and just listen.

“It is important to be a kind leader. But it is also important to focus on execution
and do the hard things. This is about how to do hard things in a human way.”— Rasmus Hougaard

It can sometimes be challenging to be compassionate when there is pressure froma fast-paced and taxing environment.
Studies have found that compassionate leaders are perceived as stronger and more competent.
Unfortunately, leaders do not always feel that they can spare the time or emotional energy to exercise
compassion.
It can be helpful to jot down tips to help prepare for difficult conversations and potential issues thatwill likely require a compassionate approach. Reflecting on these steps prior to tackling a difficult
situation and entering a conversation will make it much easier for leaders to be compassionate andstill preserve professionalism.
There are four steps (and associated tips) to consider before entering into any conversation,
particularly a challenging one:
Step 1

Caring presence
When engaging in challenging conversations, simply being present can make all the difference. The
mantra is “be here.”Tips• Leaders should be where their feet are. In some cases, physically looking down and reminding
themselves to be where they are standing can help leaders be present.
• Putting themselves in the other person’s shoes helps leaders imagine how the other person will
receive the conversation. How will it affect them? What emotions will arise in them?
• Move into intention. What can leaders do to make the situation better for the receiver? How canleaders help team members develop from this?

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IDEA BRIEF / EVENT INSIGHTS

Step 2Caring courage
By default, doing hard things requires courage. It takes courage to go into uncomfortable, awkward, andsometimes confrontational situations. The mantra is “courage over comfort.”

Tips• For the sake of mutual growth, always abandon comfort. Not moving into discomfort is adisservice to everyone involved. Assuming courage eventually gets easier and becomes a habit. Do
uncomfortable things every day.
• When entering a situation, balance professional candor with personal care. Ruthless honesty is not
helpful to anyone.
• Avoid the empathy trap. Resist the temptation to want to avoid hurting the other person.

Step 3Caring directness
When engaging in difficult conversations, there is a tendency to sugarcoat and offer the proverbial“compliment sandwich.” It is unnecessary. Direct is faster and more efficient. Say the hard thing rightaway. The mantra is “bottom line first.”

Tips• Do not beat around the bush. Receivers know something is coming. The longer the delay, the greater
their discomfort and apprehension. It does not make the message less difficult when it comes.
Getting to the bottom line at the top of the conversation allows the receiver to recover from theshock as the conversation continues.
• Prepare the first sentence and last sentence prior to the meeting. An example of the first sentence
might be “This is not the conversation I was hoping we would have today because I have to tell you
that...” The last sentence might be “I know this was not what you had hoped for.”• End on a constructive and collaborative note.

Step 4

Caring transparency
The more leaders practice this kind of transparency, the more it becomes a honed skill that teams
will also begin to adopt. It helps people know where they stand and what their next moves should be,creating greater trust, psychological safety, and performance. The mantra is “clarity is kindness.”

Tips• Tell the truth. While there may be some things a leader cannot share openly, it is important to shareas much as possible. The more that is shared, the more the receiver can begin planning the next
steps. Treat them like adults.
• Avoid playing the popularity game. Leadership is not about popularity. It is about doing the rightthings, which are not always well received.
• Human beings have a tendency to want to be liked. Focus on being respected rather than simply liked.

“Take five minutes to review these steps, and then enter the conversation. I
can promise you that the conversation is going to be easier for both leaders
and receivers—more professional and more compassionate.”— Rasmus Hougaard

COPYRIGHT © 2021 HARVARD BUSINESS SCHOOL PUBLISHING CORPORATION. ALL RIGHTS RESERVED.
Created for Harvard Business Publishing Corporate Learning by BullsEye Resources www.bullseyeresources.com.

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IDEA BRIEF / EVENT INSIGHTS

Rasmus Hougaard is the founder and CEO of Potential Project and the author of the groundbreaking andbest-selling book by Harvard Business Press, The Mind of the Leader. Rasmus was nominated by Thinkers50
as one of the eight most important leadership thinkers in the world today. He writes for Harvard Business Review, Forbes, and Business Insider. He is a sought-after keynote speaker and leadership developer who coaches and supports C-suite executives at global organizations such as IKEA, Accenture, Walmart, and Unilever.
His new book, Compassionate Leadership: How to Do Hard Things in a Human Way, is published by Harvard Business
Publishing.
Angela Gest-McCall partners with individuals, teams, and organizations to strengthen mindsets,focus, and leadership capability, inviting people to go beyond what they thought possible and unleash
untapped potential. She brings 25+ years of experience and strong strategic and business acumen to
all her conversations, combining this with a highly impactful relational coaching approach to enableclients to achieve significant and meaningful change, both personally and professionally.
She has extensive experience working with C-suite and regional executives from different cultures around the world, both
virtually and in person. Her expertise ranges from recognizing and leveraging strengths to unleash untapped capacity
and aligning mindsets and capabilities that strengthen strategic focus and delivery to accelerating the process of teamformation and reducing ramp-up time to peak performance, as well as developing strategies and tactics for ongoingsustainable performance.
She has a BA in international marketing and German (Greenwich University, UK), an MSc in executive coaching (Ashridge
Business School, UK), and is EMCC EIA certified at the Senior Practitioner level. She speaks English, Dutch, and German
and has extensive experience in developing people from different cultures around the world. Originally from the UK,
Angela now lives in the Netherlands.

This summary is from a Harvard Business Publishing Corporate Learning event and conversations with clients.
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Created for Harvard Business Publishing Corporate Learning by BullsEye Resources www.bullseyeresources.com.

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