Customer Interaction Patterns
Linda Rising
Abstract
With the increasing emphasis on business awareness, we are all asked to play a more active rolein interfacing with customers, both internal as well as external. This new role poses a challenge
for those of us who may need guidance to improve their effectiveness in customer interaction.
Who is the customer of an IT professional? We say the customer is anyone to whom theprofessional makes a value-producing promise. This applies not only to the ordinary notion ofsomeone purchasing a product or a service but also to users of software systems, to clients of IT
professionals, to students of IT teachers, and team members with each other and their teamleaders. [Denning+01]
As Gerald Weinberg [Karten94] has noted: How could an industry as large as the informationindustry get so far removed from its customers? As industries go, we are large, but we are new.
In our short history, we’ve seen numerous cases of systems development in which a job
estimated at ten thousand dollars wound up costing a hundred thousand dollars. We’ve asked fora two-page report on sales of steak and gotten a thousand pages on sales of everything fromhamburgers to steers. Our customers expect little from us, or expect the wrong things, and in thisthey’re not disappointed. We thought that as our technical prowess grew, our customers would
be happier, but they aren’t. To match our increasing ability to produce excellent systems, weneed to increase our ability to manage our customer’s expectations.
Introduction
An early version of the patterns was workshopped at PLoP '97. After several internal workshops
and updates, a later version was workshopped at PLoP '98 and published [Rising99].
At ChiliPLoP 2002, Terry Fujino, Takako (Tina) Nakatani, Mari Sakuri and I mapped out theorganizational world that interfaces with the customer. It includes: the customer, the enterpriselevel, and development. The relationships involve expectation management among all three.
Several new patterns were developed: Bad News Early, Goal, Meaningful Meetings, Own the
Problem, Relevance Testing, and Skinny Chicken. Some of these were workshopped at
ChiliPLoP with special guests: David DeLano, Karen Hanmer, and Eugene Wallingford, andhave been added to the collection.
The patterns have all been re-written in pseudo-Alexanderian format: the name is followed by ametaphorical story, then the context, problem, forces and rationale, problem statement andresulting context. Known uses are described at the end. Some of the older patterns have been
given new names: Customer Understanding was Know the Customer, Effective Listening was
Listen, Listen, Listen; Trust Account was Build Trust; Timely Response was Be Responsive; It’s
Not Just the Meeting was Customer Meetings: Go Early, Stay Late; Personal Integrity was Show
Personal Integrity; Customer Relief was Take Your Licks; Within the Lines was Be Aware of
Copyright © 2002, Linda Rising. Permission is granted to copy for the PLoP 2002 conference. All other rights reserved.

Boundaries; and Good Manners was Mind Your Manners.

Copyright © 2002, Linda Rising. Permission is granted to copy for the PLoP 2002 conference. All other rights reserved.

Pattern

IntentIt's a Relationship, Not a
Sale

Develop a relationship with the customer. Focus on thisrelationship, not the current transaction. Use: Customer
Understanding and Trust Account.

Customer Understanding

Learn as much as possible about the customer. Use: Effective
Listening, Timely Response and It’s Not Just the Meeting.

Trust Account

Every contact with the customer is a chance to Trust Account.
Take advantage of it. Use: Effective Listening, Timely Response
and It’s Not Just the Meeting.

Effective Listening

Listen to the customer with intent to understand. Use Personal
Integrity, Within the Lines, Customer Relief, and Good
Manners.

Beautiful Termination
with Satisfaction

When a relationship built on trust has been established with acustomer, you can end agreements without rancor.

Timely Response

When you receive a request from the customer let the customer
know you received it and how you plan to resolve it.

It’s Not Just the Meeting

Arrive at meetings early enough to meet other attendees andspend time socializing. After the meeting, allow a little time totalk to others with common business interests.

Personal Integrity

Don't withhold important information from the customer but
stay Within the Lines.

Customer Relief

Don't argue. Try to understand how the customer's business is
impacted. Don't try to appease the customer by making
promises you can't keep. Stay Within the Lines and use Good
Manners.

Within the Lines

Treat every conversation with the customer as part of anegotiation. Don't discuss commercial considerations, e.g.,
price, cost, schedule, and content that aren't part of yourresponsibilities. Use Good Manners.

Good Manners

Be polite. Dress appropriately to meet customer expectations.
Show respect for everyone, including competitors. Be careful ininteractions with others in front of the customer.

Copyright © 2002, Linda Rising. Permission is granted to copy for the PLoP 2002 conference. All other rights reserved.

Skinny Chicken

When you know well in advance that an end date cannot be
met, identify the subset that is most important to your customer
and deliver that functionality early.
Table 1. Customer Interaction Patterns

It's a Relationship, Not a Sale
Feargal Quinn, founder of Ireland’s chain of Superquinn markets, grew up spending school
breaks at his father’s Red Island holiday camp. His father charged guests up front for their
entire holiday. “It was set up so that no matter how hard we worked to give our guests a great
experience, we wouldn’t increase our profit from their stay,” says Quinn. “The only way we
could judge our success was if the guests said, ‘I had a great holiday. I’m rebooking for next
year.’ Every thing we did was centered on one overriding aim: to get people to come back. I
learned that if you look after getting repeat business, profit will largely take care of itself. When
faced with any business decision, any call on your time or resources, ask, “What will this do tohelp bring the customer back?” [LaBarre01]
You currently play an active role in interfacing with customers or you have been asked to take on
this role. Customer Rapport (develop a rapport with the customer) [Whitenack95] and Engage
Customers (closely couple the customer role to the Developer) [Coplien95] define the context forthis pattern.
You want to delight your customers but also protect your own interests.
When you need a customer contact, you may just want a name and a phone number. Just having
a person to call is not enough; a relationship with the customer gives the results you want.
The relationship with the customer is like a dance. You take steps, the customer takes steps in
response, and then you take more steps. You must be focused on the flow of transactions, on theoverall pattern and direction, not merely on the current transaction. Human relationships are
fragile and not formed instantly but develop slowly and evolve over time. In business, as in life,
it takes a long time to make friends. [Kohn97] It's easier to build a relationship than to re-build a
relationship. Don't assume that a relationship is static. It must be supported and maintained overtime.
The quality-satisfaction gap is not about products. It is about feeling. In a culture where you arebombarded every day with advertisements, objectives and incentives, where someone is always
after your hard-earned money, you just want to know that if you buy their goods, they will care
once the sale is over. You want someone who cares and will take action. Caring can't come froma total quality improvement team, reengineering, just-in-time or any formula, objectives, or
consultants. Customers are human and companies are just collections of humans. [Behymer97]
Because of the clutter of offerings in the marketplace, companies need more than customer
awareness or a superficial connection, they need to connect on a deeper level. They need to
Copyright © 2002, Linda Rising. Permission is granted to copy for the PLoP 2002 conference. All other rights reserved.

respect and acknowledge the customer’s emotions—feelings such as the yearning to belong, thehope to transcend, and the desire to experience joy and fulfillment. Smart companies recognizethat great products and services can deliver more than profits; they deliver experiences that makelife better in some small way. [Bedbury02]
Therefore:
Develop a relationship with the customer. Focus on this relationship, not the current
transaction.
Develop Customer Understanding and use that understanding in your product as part of an ongoing commitment to build a Trust Account with your customer.
As you begin to give it your attention, tell your customers that you are paying more attention to
expectations management and discuss how you can jointly improve your ability to work together.
Just raising and discussing the subject can improve your ability to meet each other’s
expectations. Two important aspects of the customer relationship will emerge in these
discussions: first, the extent to which you and your customers already share similar views; andsecond, the extent to which you misjudge what is important to your customers. [Karten94]
Your customers will feel they're buying into a relationship, not just buying a product. Yourcustomers will feel like staying with you. Your customers will sense that you are goingsomewhere together. A long-term relationship means repeat business. It's much cheaper to keep acustomer than to find a new one. Valued customers feel that their relationship is a personal one.
When you make each customer feel special, valued and listened to, and they will remain loyal
and likely increase their business with you.
Be careful or the customer will become too dependent on you. As a result of a close relationshipwith the customer, you will be the one the customer turns to. You will be the one who gets all
those late night phone calls, those last minute requests for urgent fixes. Everyone on your teammust practice this pattern; it’s not just a job for one person.
Our customer knows that this is a new product. They've been great about taking releases thatare not perfect and working with us to get the product where it should be. We need customer
feedback in the iterative development approach we're taking. [AGCS]
The customer pulled us into the market. We didn't know much about it and the customer was
also learning. We followed the customer and just let them lead us. [AGCS]
Now that the system is up and running, they are monitoring the system and alerting me if
things don't look right. This wasn't a matter of installing the system, leaving, and now we'reon our own. I feel like I have their support on an ongoing basis. [Inside98]
Originator: Jim McCarthy [McCarthy95].

Customer Understanding
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When it comes to getting a feel for the customer, nothing beats “jumping the counter.” Eachmonth, managers of Ireland’s Superquinn Markets are required to spend time “in the customer’s
shoes” (shopping, asking questions, lodging complaints, waiting in line). “The difference
between being a customer yourself and waiting on a customer is amazing,” says founder Feargal
Quinn. “What seems reasonable or even valuable from the perspective of the company is often
glaringly wrong from the pint of view of the customer.”
You understand It's a Relationship, Not a Sale.
You feel that just knowing your product is enough.
It's not enough to ask customers, "How are we doing?" You have to ask, "How are you
doing?" You need to understand your customer's wants and needs. If you really understand,you'll be able to apply your expertise to meet the needs they express and some things they
may not even know they need. [Guaspari98]
The question "What are your requirements?" is the wrong question. The right question is"What is your world?" Once you begin to understand your customers' organization, theirconcerns, and their way of working, it becomes much easier to understand their requirements.
To understand their needs, understand their culture, their hopes, and their expectations. Know
your customers as people first and customers second. Understand your customers and you'll
understand their expectations. [Thomsett97]
Knowing your customer's products and services and how the customer gets these products
and services to market helps you understand how the customer thinks from a business pointof view. If you think about the customer's needs instead of your own, the business will takecare of itself. Understand how your customers make money and help them make more andyour income will take care of itself. Helping your customer succeed is a sure way to success.
Therefore:
Learn as much as you can about your customer to understand their needs.
Help the customer and the customer's customers succeed. Learn the "inside" of the customer's
business and the "far side," (the users and vendors whose products must work with yours).
Understand the needs and drives of all customers along the customer chain, from intermediateproviders to ultimate users.
See your customers as people, human breathing beings; listen to them; talk to them, and study
them so you can anticipate what they'll want next even before they're aware of it. [Covey89]
There is no substitute for an on-site visit. See the customer's world and the problems they face.
One trip is worth hours of brain storming about the customers' needs. Get hands on experience inthe customer environment. Some customers will allow you to visit their site and take notes whilepeople use your product. Customers can also provide documentation for their business processes.
Provide customer interaction at an appropriate level. A vice-president feels more comfortable
talking to someone at a higher level, while engineers want someone who knows low-level
Copyright © 2002, Linda Rising. Permission is granted to copy for the PLoP 2002 conference. All other rights reserved.

details.
If the customer does not speak your language (technical, lingual), learn at least some of thecustomer's language.
Use Effective Listening, Timely Response and It’s Not Just the Meeting.
When you understand the customer's world, your products become more useful. Understanding
the world of your customers' customers helps ensure that products integrate properly for thecustomer. When you understand your customers' values, you become an extension of theirenterprise.
Understanding the customer enables a better understanding of customer priorities. This can bevaluable if a trade-off between schedule and functionality must be made.
Applying this solution is not as easy as it may sound. Company culture and politics may bebeyond your understanding. This is an on-going task; our environment and that of our customer
continually change. Our organization and the customers' organizations are "many-headed beasts"
and present different views to different people at different times.
If you know someone, they'll do anything for you. You can call them in the middle of the night. If
you don't have a relationship like that, you have to follow an official path and it takes longer.
[AGCS]
Originator: Rod Veach

Trust Account
A customer at a remote site called up with a problem. I tried to reproduce the problem but
everything worked fine here! We talked on the phone as I entered the commands. They swore up
and down that they had followed the User's Guide. Something didn't seem right. I knew Stan
Ricksecker had a good relationship with the customer, so I asked him to help me. Minutes later,
Stan told me they were afraid they would have to pay for a fix if they admitted that everything
they had done wasn't as documented in the User's Guide. Once he found that out, it didn't takelong to find out they had used the wrong command. The fix was easy and provided without cost.
The relationship Stan had with the customer and their trust in him could not be replaced by myknowledge of growth processes or anything else. [Kromrie-Williams]
You understand It's a Relationship, Not a Sale and are trying to develop Customer
Understanding.
You want your customers to trust you.
If I make deposits into a Trust Account with you through courtesy, kindness, honesty, andkeeping my commitments to you, I build up a reserve. Your trust toward me becomes higher, andI can call upon that trust many times if I need to. I can even make mistakes and that trust level,that emotional reserve, will compensate for it. My communication may not be clear, but you'll
Copyright © 2002, Linda Rising. Permission is granted to copy for the PLoP 2002 conference. All other rights reserved.

get my meaning anyway. When the Trust Account is high, communication is easy, instant, andeffective. [Covey89]
Clients prefer to do business with people they like, with people who seem genuinely interested inthem, who deal with their concerns. The worst customer interaction mistake for some customers
is to get right down to business, while others do not want to waste time on preliminaries. It's
extremely important to develop Customer Understanding. The most critical result produced
during an initial meeting is to begin to add to your Trust Account. [Hunter98]
People buy products from people. All things being equal people will do business with people
they like. All things not being equal, they still will! [Edler95]
Therefore:
To earn the customer’s trust, make promises and keep them. Trust grows over time insmall, incremental steps.
Not calling is not caring. Stay in touch. Customers need to see and hear from you. They need toknow how much you care. [Edler95]
Use Timely Response and It’s Not Just the Meeting.
As a trusting relationship is established, customer interaction becomes easier, questions areanswered, problems are solved, and progress is made.
Steve Holm had been working on ATIUM View for some time when he was transferred to anotherproject. Steve had a good working relationship with our customer. Steve informed the customer
about the transfer but promised to see the work through until the network was turned up (4months in the future). Steve attended meetings and fielded calls from the customer, but thenpassed the requests along to me and others—the Facade pattern? The customer was happy
because Steve's project move was transparent to them. It worked nicely for me, too, because
Steve passed along information to help me so I didn't have to tackle the requests cold. [Grover]Customers usually don't want too many contacts. They just want to interact with one person.
[AGCS]
Originator: David Saar

Effective Listening
It wasn’t the first time I’d listened to a customer, and it wouldn’t be the last. Virtually every
product evolved from discussions with and suggestions from our customers. In years to come weeven involved them in the design stage, asking what they thought the product should do, how it
should work. [Kurtzig91]
You understand It's a Relationship, Not a Sale. You are trying to develop Customer
Understanding and build a Trust Account.
Copyright © 2002, Linda Rising. Permission is granted to copy for the PLoP 2002 conference. All other rights reserved.

What people say is often open to misinterpretation. Sometimes what they say isn't what
they mean.
"Seek first to understand" involves a very deep shift in paradigm. We typically seek first to beunderstood. Most people do not listen with the intent to understand; they listen with the intent to
reply. When I say empathic listening, I mean listening with intent to understand. I mean seeking
first to understand, to really understand. Empathic listening gets inside another person's frame ofreference. You look out through it, you see the world the way they see the world, you understandtheir paradigm, you understand how they feel. [Covey89]
Listening is the most difficult skill to learn and the most important to have. Learning how tolisten and really hear what people are saying can make all the difference. When you listen well
you hear: What customers say and what they really mean. What your customers are reallylooking to achieve, including hidden agendas. What your customers think is important. Spend
twice as much time listening as talking. [Edler95]
Therefore:
Listen, really listen, to your customer. Ask lots of questions and spend more time listening
than talking. Give them room. It may not be until the tenth sentence that the customers
says what they really want.
Be genuinely interested instead of using the time to prepare your response. Follow their agenda
instead of interrupting or going off on tangents. Be flexible and positive, with an agreeable,
winning attitude.
If you’re too anxious to please, you may speak out of turn. Let the customers talk. If you cut
them off too early, you'll miss their meaning.
Sometimes you need to hear what isn’t said to learn what the customer is thinking. Sometimes
you need to push for more information. Ask probing questions. Ask them to draw a picture!
Listening and appearing to listen can be two different things. Some people listen well whilestaring into space, which can be disturbing to someone who expects you to make eye contact.
Some people doodle or take notes while listening, which can be upsetting for those who wantyour undivided attention. If you don’t have sufficient Customer Understanding, ask about
personal style issues, even if a customer doesn’t have any quirks, he will appreciate being asked
how he feels.
Show Personal Integrity, don’t make commitments outside your area of responsibility—stayWithin the Lines, and use Good Manners.
Nothing replaces listening to your own customers firsthand. Not only will you find out what
you’re doing right and wrong, you might just pick up an idea for a brand-new product orbusiness. [Mariott97]
The customer will feel valued, that concerns are being heard and issues addressed. More thanthis, the customer's needs really will be heard since you will really be listening.
Copyright © 2002, Linda Rising. Permission is granted to copy for the PLoP 2002 conference. All other rights reserved.

Listening is only one part of building a trusting relationship with the customer. In isolation it will
not work. It must be part of an overall customer interaction strategy.
A sales manager at Armstrong International wanted to add an obsolete feature to thedivision's new fish finder. This approach contradicted company strategy—always provide thelatest and greatest technological advance. The sales manager wanted to add a simple flasher
to a product that already provided information on the location and size of the fish. No one
could understand why the simple indicator would be useful. The sales manager pointed outthat many longtime customers were not comfortable with the new, computerized technology
and wanted the simple interface they were used to. [Armstrong92]
One of our quality measures dealt with response time to user problem calls. A call had to be
responded to within an hour. The support person had to call the user to get any further required
detail and let the user know that we were working on the problem. This was a feel-good measure
to let the customer know we cared. Systems were put in place to notify us when a call wasreceived, and when the return call was made. However, the customer wasn't interested in thecall-back. They wanted their problem fixed! And they told us that in various forums. Well, weweren't measuring that!
In late 1997, Yellow Freight surveyed 10,000 randomly selected customers. Since then, thecompany surveys 600 different customers a month. Those 15-minute conversations are vital. For
a company that relied on internal criteria, letting people from outside, its customers, evaluate
performance wasn't easy—especially when Yellow learned that its assumptions about customers
were wrong. "We thought speed and price were the most important things," says Greg Reid,
senior vice president. "But according to our research, what matters most is that you pick up
when you say you're going to, deliver when you say you're going to, and don't damage thefreight." Customers who said that they would use Yellow again and recommend it to others had
gotten good service. Those who hadn't were less loyal. It was a fairly obvious lesson for a
traditional service provider, but it was a critical one for a company that was trying to become
customer-centric. "What happens when consumers anywhere get bad service? They don't comeback," says Reid. [Salter02]
Originator: David Saar

Beautiful Termination with Satisfaction
You have already established It’s a Relationship, Not a Sale through several interactions withyour customer and the products and/or services you have provided as a result of thoseinteractions. This has also enabled project members to build a Trust Account and Customer
Understanding. However, the business environment changes so rapidly that some of thecustomer requests require too much effort and you realize that it would be impossible to meet thecustomer’s expectation within the specified budget and/or time schedule. Team members arehonest enough to show Personal Integrity.
It would be easy to simply continue the current situation with your eyes closed, but it might
Copyright © 2002, Linda Rising. Permission is granted to copy for the PLoP 2002 conference. All other rights reserved.

result in failing to meet the customer’s expectations.
Once we have an established relationship, inertia sets in and we tend to continue as we have inthe past. Everyone wants to be satisfied no matter what path the relationship takes. Moreover,making a negative decision is hard, especially when it might risk an established relationship andfurther business opportunities.
Dwyer has identified five stages of buyer-seller relationships. [Dwyer97] Dissolution is
independent of these and can occur in any stage. Other models can be found in [Wilson99],[Warsta02].
1.

Awareness2.

Exploration

3.

Expansion

4.

Commitment

5.

Dissolution

Dissolution that occurs earlier than stage 3 could not be beautiful, since a relationship andcooperation have not been well established and a Trust Account could not have been built. Trustin a relationship is built over time; close and continuing relationships are seen as vital to building
trust [Young91]. According to a definition of trust as “a willingness to rely on the behavior of an
exchange partner in whom one has confidence,” [Moorman93] it can be seen that dissolution
would be applicable only in stage 3 or later.
Be honest yourself and convince all stakeholders, especially your customer, that thetermination of the relationship is the best way to retain the shared goals and benefits bothsides have enjoyed. Good medicine tastes bitter, but you still have to take it. Since you havebuilt a good relationship with your customer, your customer will trust you and understandwhat you intend to do. Such a termination is a Beautiful Termination with Satisfaction.
Even a negative decision, if it is done with careful consideration, could be a fruitful one thatprevents the stakeholders from suffering the damages caused by continuing the current
agreement. All stakeholders can be satisfied with the mutual goals and benefits they haveobtained, and the agreeable termination of the relationship allows the company to re-build therelationship again with the customer in the future.
A Beautiful Termination with Satisfaction makes it easier for all stakeholders to rekindle therelationship built on trust at some future time.
Two years ago, Nissan, one of the major car manufacturing companies in Japan, had been doing
poorly in business. To overcome hard times, the CEO had decided to implement a crucial
Copyright © 2002, Linda Rising. Permission is granted to copy for the PLoP 2002 conference. All other rights reserved.

curtailment, including a large cut back on personnel. Last year, Nissan has achieved the firstgoal they had promised and also demonstrated their successful recovery from the critical phase.
Later, they started to recruit the experienced personnel they had once dismissed from thecompany, with better treatment than before. Many experienced engineers have been happy to rejoin the company, holding no grudges, since the cut back was probably the only chance for themto overcome the difficulty they were facing at that time, and realize today’s success. A Japanesenewspaper created the term “V-letter recovery” to represent this kind of quick recovery.
Originator: Tina Nakatani

Timely Response
As one company built a closer relationship with a customer, systems staff were surprised by how
strongly their customers wanted not instantaneous service, as was expected, but simply to be kept
informed on a timely basis. [Karten94]
You understand It's a Relationship, Not a Sale. You are trying to develop Customer
Understanding and build your Trust Account.
Nothing annoys customers more than believing you're not responsive. It doesn't help to beworking hard on their behalf if you don't let them know what you’re doing.
People don't like to be ignored, and that includes customers. You want to be attentive to yourcustomers, but you can't always give an immediate response. Sometimes you may be away fromthe office or the system may be down.
Therefore:
Return customer calls or e-mails the same day, even if you know the customer will havealready left the office.
Never let the customer wait more than a week for a response on anything. When you receive therequest, contact the customer to say you received it and how you plan to resolve it. If you can't
get final resolution in a week, contact the customer, and say what you have done so far.
Sometimes you must get back to customers immediately and try to complete requests in a day.
Always ask customers, "What is your deadline?" to determine an appropriate response time.
Have a message on your voice mail and autoreply on your e-mail if you are out of the office.
This notifies internal as well as external customers if you're away and whom to contact in yourstead.
Don't let your enthusiasm for a quick response lead you to overpromise. Show Personal
Integrity.
Keeping customers informed of your progress on a request lets them know you are taking therequest seriously, that action is being taken. Customers will feel you have their best interests at
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heart.
Always remember to acknowledge voice mail or e-mail. Just say, "I got it!" [AGCS]
A customer called and asked if we would be interested in quoting price/delivery for a new
product. I got details on the project and within 2 days provided them with a quote. Over the
next week, I spent time getting to know the customer and telling them about our services.
When I asked when they were going to make a decision, I was told they were leaning toward
accepting our bid but had to wait for a reply from another company. They had given theother company the opportunity to bid this project 2 weeks prior to giving it to us. Overall, it
took the other company about a month to get back to them with a quote. Once we wereawarded the business, it took about 2 weeks to get a signed contract. This was the start of agreat relationship with this customer. We delivered 30 days early with 0 defects. The main
reason the customer went with us was because they felt comfortable with us every step of theway. [Davis]
A remote site was experiencing database problems that were interfering with providing
certain services to the customer. All attempts to recreate the problem using our interactive
simulation tool or the prototype failed. We had an entire week's database changes shipped tous. Using the same load they had, I tried to recreate the problem by entering an entire weekof the same commands, which took several days, working day and night. During this time, thecustomer received no word from us. Finally, the customer called and wanted to know what
was going on. By this time, all the commands been entered and everything looked like itworked fine. We decided to do an audit of their patches and found several that were missing.
Our customers are very knowledgeable. I wish I had kept them more informed. We might
have come up with the idea of the patch audit sooner. Certainly they would have felt more
involved. It's too easy to be on one side of a problem and not benefit from expertise on theother side. Keeping the customer informed is only one of the many lessons I learned from thisexperience, but one of the most important. [Kromrie-Williams]
Originator: Linda Leonard

It’s Not Just the Meeting
There is a legitimate social component to meetings. Sure, we'd all rather spend our time on real
work than idle chitchat. But you should never overlook the social side of work rituals—even inmeetings that are all business. In many of the meetings I run—especially meetings that take place
early in the day—I schedule 5 or 10 minutes of open time, just to encourage people to relate to
one another. If you plan for such time, if you put it on your agenda, then you won't feel you're
not doing what you ought to be doing. Instead, you can enjoy going around the room and asking
people what they did last night or over the weekend. [Imperato99]
You understand It's a Relationship, Not a Sale. You’re trying to develop better Customer
Understanding and build your Trust Account.
Copyright © 2002, Linda Rising. Permission is granted to copy for the PLoP 2002 conference. All other rights reserved.

You have to attend customer meetings and find them a chore. You're not getting anywherebuilding good customer relationships at these meetings. Often team members arrive just as
the meeting starts and leave as the last slide is presented.
You want customers to be aware of the current status of the product. Some people feel that social
interaction (especially meetings) is lost productivity. Even those who aren’t rabid meeting-haters
still have too much do to and too little time in which to do it.
There are many meetings whose real purpose is to get concerned parties together. The announced
purpose may be to hear status information, but the true benefit is the personal exchange that
happens around the meetings. Spending a little time socializing beforehand allows everyone tocome to the meeting with a sense of camaraderie, which makes the meeting more effective. That,in turn, makes the time after the meeting more worthwhile. Often a post-meeting gathering iswhere the real work is done.
Therefore:
Arrive at the meeting with enough time to meet attendees you don’t know and renew old
acquaintanceships. After the meeting, allow a little time to talk to others with common
business interests.
If you are holding the meeting, plan for the pre- and post-meetings but keep it as short as
possible. Don't lose your sense of the time constraints of the customer and your team members.
We are all under time pressure, so a fine balance is required to convey the right message to ourcustomers.
When you show up a little early, this allows the meeting to start on time and sends a message tocustomers that you value their time.
The extensions before and after the meeting more than justify the routine occurrence of themeeting itself, which becomes a shared experience instead of an obligation. A perfunctory or
routine meeting becomes a positive experience that builds the Trust Account and solves real
problems.
This pattern has broader implications than customer interaction. As companies include more
telecommuters, there is the increasing loss of visibility to these employees. This can be harmful
both to the worker and the company. The employee feels removed from team interaction and thecompany loses sight of the employee's contribution. Taking a little time before and after the
meeting can make a tremendous difference in the lives of those who are not physically present
for the meeting.
Our group had a "meeting rep" who volunteered to go to all meetings to represent the groupand save time for team members. It sounded like a great idea. The volunteer was wellintentioned and was sincerely trying to save effort for the team. The result, however, was areal loss of visibility by the team. No one else was part of interface meetings, so they had no
input to agreements and misunderstood some requirements, but the real impact was to the
team's visibility to the rest of the project. Team members missed valuable networking
Copyright © 2002, Linda Rising. Permission is granted to copy for the PLoP 2002 conference. All other rights reserved.

opportunities and visibility to project management. [Kromrie-Williams]
Originator: David Saar

Personal Integrity
You understand It's a Relationship, Not a Sale. You are trying to develop Customer
Understanding and build your Trust Account.
You want to be honest with your customer, but you don’t want to look bad.
Failure to describe your situation accurately can erode your Trust Account. Part of an honest
relationship is sharing bad news. Some problems go away on their own, while others escalate. In
the early stages, it’s hard to tell the difference.
Integrity includes but goes beyond honesty. Honesty is telling the truth—conforming yourwords to reality. Integrity is conforming reality to your words—keeping promises andfulfilling expectations. Lack of integrity can undermine almost any other effort to build a
Trust Account. People can seek to understand, remember the little things, keep theirpromises, clarify and fulfill expectations and still fail to build reserves of trust if they don’t
show integrity. [Covey89]
Therefore:
Stay Within the Lines. Don’t share information if there is no compelling need. The customer
doesn’t need to hear every little problem, just the major impacts. Always disclose
something that would bother you, because it would probably bother customers, and if theyfound out, they'd wonder what else you were hiding. [Kohn97]
Tell the truth. Don't lie, don't deceive, and don't overpromise. Honest communication means
being open. Withholding important information is not honest. Customers who believe you won't
lie about a situation still will not trust you if they believe you are not telling them the complete
story.
Simply being honest is not the intent of this pattern. Some kinds of honest comments can be
destructive. Remember the context of this pattern contains the patterns It's a Relationship, Not a
Sale, Customer Understanding, and Trust Account.
What you sacrifice in immediate profit will be more than made up in referrals and repeat
business.
The customer will learn that you can be relied upon to convey important information, even if it is
not good news. The customer will learn to trust your word and will be calmer in the face ofannounced risks.
When negative impacts surface early, decisions can be made about the best way to address them.
In many cases, this can be done with the customer and can lead to an improved relationship and
Copyright © 2002, Linda Rising. Permission is granted to copy for the PLoP 2002 conference. All other rights reserved.

deposits in your Trust Account. In some cases, you may find the customer really doesn’t care as
much as you thought about the issue and is willing to work with you to resolve the problem
satisfactorily.
Once risks have been shared, remember to use Timely Response. The customer will expect
regular status reports. Don't just leave the customer hanging with a list of showstoppers and no
updates.
When problems come up and we tell Rod Veach, "Don't worry about it!" He believes us. We
would never hide anything from Rod. We let him know immediately about any problems.
[AGCS]
Originator: Linda Leonard

Customer Relief
From time to time customers may be disappointed with some aspect of the business relationship.
The disappointment may come from unmet expectations, product performance or from simple
misunderstandings and is often manifested as anger. More often than not, the anger is directed
toward any company representative that is at hand. You understand It's a Relationship, Not a
Sale. You're trying to develop Customer Understanding and build your Trust Account.
What's the best way to handle customer complaints and protect your own interests?
No one likes to be yelled at. Our natural response is to be defensive. Being defensive is likely toescalate the customer's anger. Anger can damage the relationship with the customer.
In calm situations, with low emotional stakes, it's easy to deal with people. They will listen torational explanations, and offer rational responses of their own. But in high-stakes situations,confrontation—overt or subtle—puts everyone on the line. [Senge+99]
As unpleasant as the situation may be, the customer may have good reasons for being
dissatisfied. By remaining calm and allowing the customer to vent, the anger will diffuse.
Keeping your composure is especially important, since, to the angry customer, you represent thecompany. Flying off the handle will not increase your Trust Account.
No one likes to get customer complaints, but it’s worse when they don’t complain. Whencustomers walk away unhappy and don’t let you know, then you’re in trouble. What they don’ttell you, they’re willing to tell a lot of other people. A satisfied customer will tell four to fivepeople about a good experience, but an unhappy customer will tell seven to nine others. Reports
of a negative experience are twice as likely to affect a buying decision as a good report. An
unhappy customer spreads a virus of negativity about your business. [Abrams02]
A customer who never tells you about a problem doesn’t give you a chance to correct it. If asalesperson is unpleasant to me and I don’t let the manager know, the more damage the badapple can do. If I take the time to complain, the manager can then train, counsel, or if necessary,
Copyright © 2002, Linda Rising. Permission is granted to copy for the PLoP 2002 conference. All other rights reserved.

fire the salesperson and reduce the damage to company’s reputation. [Abrams02]
Therefore:
Listen and don’t fake it. Apologize. Respond with helpful phrases such as: “I know thesearen’t the results you were hoping for,” while trying to learn how the customer’s business
is impacted. Regardless of whether the issue is your fault, don’t protect your pride byrefusing to accept responsibility for any product or policy. The customer doesn’t care
whether it’s your fault or not. In the customer’s eyes, you are the company.
See a complaint as an opportunity and not a confrontation. Only 20-50% of all customers withproblems will tell you about it. They are giving you a chance to improve your company andcreate a stronger relationship with them. If you handle the complaint well, you can turn a
dissatisfied customer into a customer for life. [Abrams02]
Don’t argue. Don’t blame the customer. Even if the customer has made a mistake, customers
always believe they are right, even when they’re not. Use Good Manners. An irate customer is
not a rational customer but, nonetheless, improve your Customer Understanding.
Don’t be cheap. Correcting mistakes, yours and the customers, is a normal cost of doing
business. Trying to save a little money and losing a customer is a poor way of doing business.
Don’t try to appease the customer by making promises you cannot keep. Use Personal Integrity
and stay Within the Lines. Ask questions and use Effective Listening to find out what theconcerns are. Take notes. Assure the customer that the concerns are a priority and follow up on
them. When the issue is beyond your capability, escalate the matter to management. Undercertain circumstances, a Beautiful Termination with Satisfaction may be the best thing.
Trying to solve the problem on the spot has pitfalls. Giving concessions easily may give thecustomer the impression that angry outbursts are the best way to do business with you. If you
promise something you cannot deliver, the customer's expectations will again be unmet and trust
will be broken.
The customer will calm down sooner if verbal punches are not returned. When the customer has
finished venting, the problem will still be there but the customer will feel better knowing thatyou understand the issues and will act on them.
You shouldn’t take unlimited abuse. Everyone has a different level of tolerance. When someone
crosses your personal line, escalate the problem—take it to your manager. [Reingold01]
I find that showing respect quickly, especially when dealing with an irate customer, helps diffuse
the situation. [Reingold01]
There's a big difference between apologizing for a mistake and fixing it. Most of us learned at an
early age that apologizing is the right thing to do when you're wrong. Saying, "I'm sorry" and "I
was wrong" is the mark of a mature person. It takes maturity to open up to someone who'salready mad. The act of apologizing buys you goodwill—for a while, but not if you make thesame mistake again. If my business depends on your ability to supply me what I need and you
Copyright © 2002, Linda Rising. Permission is granted to copy for the PLoP 2002 conference. All other rights reserved.

don't do that it doesn't matter if you're apologetic. Giving me tickets to the World Series doesn't
help either. If I want to stay in business, I have to find someone who can meet my needs because
my customers don't care how heartfelt your apologizes are. They want results—and so do I. If all
you're doing is finding more creative ways to appease customers instead of finding out why
mistakes are happening and making sure they don't happen again, you'll find yourself
apologizing to a new group of people—your creditors. [Mackay02]
Originator: Michael Duell

Within the Lines
You are interacting with a customer and in a position where it's easy to become engrossed inissues and/or problems. You understand It's a Relationship Not a Sale. You are trying to develop
Customer Understanding and working to build your Trust Account.
It's difficult in a problem-solving mode to step back and realize the impact of proposing asolution or giving an answer.
Many people love to solve problems and answer questions. You want to delight your customers,
but customers may have unrealistic expectations and demands. You don't want to make promises
you can't keep.
There can be wide impacts from simple discussions that can result in broken promises orincorrect information. Especially during early discussions, your goal is to understand what thecustomer really wants. It's easy to get carried away in customer interaction especially whentrying to build your Trust Account.
Everyone represents the company and can potentially impact current, future, and even pastcustomer interaction. Off-hand remarks can have a lasting impact on the customer and current
and future negotiations. There may be commercial implications of technical issues, e.g., realtime, memory size and technical impacts of commercial decisions. Don't set the customer up fordisappointment. Interactions with the customer can change not only customer perceptions but
also dollar amounts in negotiations.
When a tough question comes up, "I don't know but I'll find out!" is a lot safer than bluffing. No
one expects you to know everything. This answer shows you're honest, you're not panicking in
the face of a challenge, and you're responsive. Be sure to give a Timely Response. [Bick97]
Boundaries are good for people. They set limits on actions and make it easier to act. Boundaries
are different for different team members. Some can give information and make commitments.
Therefore:
Know your role and don’t step outside the boundaries that are appropriate for yourposition, the setting, the customer, and the point in the project.
Copyright © 2002, Linda Rising. Permission is granted to copy for the PLoP 2002 conference. All other rights reserved.

Don't discuss commercial considerations, e.g., price, cost, schedule, and content that aren't partof your responsibilities.
It is not the intent of this pattern to allow a team member to cover up mistakes or avoid talking
about risks. Show Personal Integrity.
Treat every conversation with the customer as part of a negotiation. Don't give away data or
make instant judgments. Don't say, "Oh, that's easy!" or "That's impossible!"Use Effective Listening and take note of any questions outside your area and get back withanswers. Own the action items until you find the appropriate person to take responsibility forgetting back to the customer.
The customer will feel that concerns are being heard and issues addressed but no commitments
are made that might later have to be broken. More than this, the customer's real concerns will beheard but the company's, as well as the customer's interests will be protected.
Originator: David Saar

Good Manners
I recently placed an order with a company. I asked when the new catalog was coming out. The
reply, "Oh, our brilliant marketing department decided not to issue our new catalog until thefirst of the year," made me feel uneasy. When a customer contact makes sarcastic remarks about
the company or someone in it, I feel uncomfortable dealing with them.
You understand It's a Relationship, Not a Sale. You're trying to develop a better Customer
Understanding and add to your Trust Account.
When you interact with customers, you don't always think about etiquette, dress, andbehavior.
Common courtesy is so uncommon! Simple, thoughtful acts convey a concern for the otherperson's welfare that is essential in any business interaction. The workplace environment may bevery casual. You may not always be aware of pleasantries when interacting with your team, butthese are important in customer interaction. Some people think that considering etiquette, dress,
and behavior are a waste of time, but many people can react strongly to behavior they consider
inappropriate. They may even take it personally. How we treat each other is an important sign tothe customer about how we treat people in general.
Dave Thomas, founder of Wendy's Hamburgers, said, “Be nice to everyone. Be polite.”[Kohn97]
Therefore:
Use good manners. Be polite. Be aware of body language. Dress appropriately to meet
Copyright © 2002, Linda Rising. Permission is granted to copy for the PLoP 2002 conference. All other rights reserved.

customer expectations.
Sometimes "business casual" is acceptable, at other times a suit is required, while on occasion,jeans are the norm. It helps to have a good Customer Understanding.
Show respect for everyone, including competitors.
Be especially careful in your interactions with others in front of the customer.
Speak up, speak slowly and clearly. Customers outside North America and the U.K. often do not
speak or understand English very well. Use simple language, Avoid slang or jargon. Checkfrequently that the listener understands your message. Avoid jokes about religion or politics. In
general, be careful about humor—it’s context sensitive.
Customers will feel that you are concerned about all aspects of your business interaction and areready to share their concerns and issues with your products.
Don't be so focussed on minding your manners that your behavior is stiff or overly formal.
NovaCare Inc. once rejected a candidate for the job of top legal officer because he showed up
for the interview in a casual outfit with a backpack. Even with better credentials, he wouldn't
have passed muster because "he didn't look professional," says Gerry Johnson Geckle, a
NovaCare vice president. The job went to a candidate who wore a dark suit and white dress shirt
to the interview. It can be just as fatal to flout casual codes. Elementary school teacher Susie
Swafford reports she was turned down for several jobs in suburban Colorado schools because
she overdressed for interviews. Ms. Swafford says she usually showed up in a linen suit andpumps, her hair and makeup flawless. Big mistake. She met with one principal who wore faded
shorts and propped her bare feet on a chair. Another school official interviewed her in jeans.
They bluntly told Ms. Swafford that she looked like a "model" or "cheerleader," and that her
fancy appearance intimidated other teachers. [Bounds+98]
Originator: David Saar

Skinny Chicken
I went to one of our developers and said, “We have a customer request for a new security cost
driver. Can you fit it in?” The developer answered, “I think it’s complicated. Looks like six
weeks to me. However,” he added, “if there’s one of the cost drivers they’re not using, I can givethem a special version of the program with that slot replaced by computer security in a couple ofdays. Would that be a good interim solution?” This wasn’t what I expected but it lookedreasonable. The developer delivered the quick fix on schedule and three weeks later I was
pleasantly surprised to have a full new version—in half the originally estimated time. Suppose
the developer had initially said, “Sure, no problem,” and proceeded to deliver the solution inthree weeks. I would have been unhappy and the customer would have been unhappy with me.
Instead, the developer gave me an acceptable short-term fix and came in ahead of schedule on
the longer time request to create a new release of the product. [Boehm00]
Copyright © 2002, Linda Rising. Permission is granted to copy for the PLoP 2002 conference. All other rights reserved.

You’re showing Personal Integrity and informing a customer about an unavoidable slip of anend date. You understand Within the Lines and have the power to negotiate with the customer
about content and delivery dates. You have enough Customer Understanding to identify a subsetof the promised product that the customer values. You have a significant Trust Account.
You want the customer to be happy even when a promised delivery will be late.
Even when you do your best, things out of your control can go wrong, but you shouldn’t simply
give in to bad luck; you should be proactive in solving problems. Sometimes you can’t meetcustomer expectations but you can work with the customer to find a mutually satisfactory
solution.
Sometimes the customer really doesn’t need as much as you thought he did and would besatisfied with less if the most important functionality for his business were delivered early.
Deliver some functionality early. Ideally, this should be the part of the product that has themost value for the customer.
Use Personal Integrity. Negotiate a new end date for the rest of the product. Be sure this date isachievable to avoid disappointing the customer again.
Your customer will be happy for several reasons:
1. The damage of the slipped date is minimized.
2. The most desirable functionality is delivered ahead of schedule.
3. The most solid end date possible is negotiated for delivery of the remaining functionality.
It takes time away from development to negotiate the content of the Skinny Chicken, its delivery
date and that of the remaining functionality. It also takes time to restructure development toensure the new dates are met. If the new end date must be moved, you risk serious erosion to
your Trust Account and perhaps the end of the customer relationship.
I remember when I first saw this pattern in practice. The development team knew well in advancethat the scheduled end date could not be met but they knew the customer so well that theyrealized which subset of features mattered most for the next release of the customer’s product.
By drawing a bit out of the Trust Account and making good on their promise to deliver the mostneeded functionality early, the development team and the customer were both winners.
Originator: Linda Rising

Acknowledgements
Thanks to the members of the PLoP '97 Workshop on People and Process for their insightfulcomments: Brad Appleton, Mike Beedle, Steve Berczuk, Charles Crowley, David DeLano,David Dikel, David Kane, Don Olson, and Bill Opdyke.
Copyright © 2002, Linda Rising. Permission is granted to copy for the PLoP 2002 conference. All other rights reserved.

Thanks to Peter Sommerlad, my shepherd for PLoP '98, for all his helpful comments and to Bill
Opdyke, my program committee member, for contributing valuable feedback.
Thanks to the members of the PLoP '98 Workshop, Zen View, for their valuable comments: Jens
Coldewey, David Cymbala, Bob Hanmer, Fernando Lyardet, Bill Opdyke, Oskar Nierstrasz,
Rosemary Michelle Simpson, and Jenifer Tidwell.
Thanks to Andy Carlson, my shepherd for PLoP 2002, for his helpful comments.

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Copyright © 2002, Linda Rising. Permission is granted to copy for the PLoP 2002 conference. All other rights reserved.