Preface

PrefaceTwenty-six years have already passed since I won the International
Besançon Competition for Young Conductors in 1982. Since then, I have run
my life at full speed and many things have happened. During these years, I
experienced a shoulder injury, acted as the resident conductor at the Central Aichi
Symphony Orchestra in Nagoya, my hometown, and met people from variousfields.
I also started doing water color paintings and became a member of theDaicho Kai where I met people from the field of painting. As I began to realize
the hidden sense of colors within me, I gained ambition to produce a variety ofconcerts. I wondered if I could create the colors of sound with an orchestra, justlike mixing colors on a palette.
I have come this far, encouraged by many people and supported byheavy rain, snow, and the typhoon, my friend. And even before I knew it, I wassurrounded by wonderful friends to play music with me and for me.
The stream of such life began in Besançon, France, on September 14th,1982. I want to let the stream wind more widely and more actively than before.
Yoko Matsuo

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Prologue
It happened in a moment. It was as if I were watching a slow motion
video, with my body up in the air. The next moment, I found myself slipping
down the stairs. I realized that I had lost my footing. I had just finishedconducting a complex concerto, and I decided to enjoy my vacation and set out
for shopping. It was raining outside and the soles of my shoes were wet, whichcaused me to slip on the stairs. Before realizing what was happening to me, I
had slipped all the way down to the bottom without stopping. When I did finallystop, I touched my right shoulder. It was swollen. I made a sound judgementthat it was dislocated. It was my poor mother who had been next to me andhad seen the entire accident. Her face was pale. She did not understand what
had happened, and was worried about what would happen to me after theaccident.
Immediately we went to a hospital and had my right shoulder relocatedinto the joint.
I asked the doctor, “Another concert is coming in three days. I
can conduct the concert, can’t I?”
I was too optimistic. The doctor sternly
warned me, “No way. You must fix your shoulder firmly and keep it immobilized.
Otherwise, it could be easily dislocated again. This has to be treated cautiously,
because you are a conductor.” I had never had a serious injury in my whole life,and had never cancelled a concert due to sickness. “Something very serious
must have happened,” I realized.
But I was still not taking the situation
seriously, thinking that I could manage to conduct with my left hand.
It turned out that I was not allowed to move my right arm for six weeks
and the right arm had to be wrapped tight. There were so many things that I had
to do, such as cooking and eating a meal, drinking wine, and playing the piano.
At first I used a spoon and fork with my left hand to eat, and then I began using
chopsticks with the left hand. I typed letters in my word processor with my left
hand, of course. I was told that my left hand writings were neater and easier toread than my right hand writings. I liked making gyoza dumplings, so I preparedthem with my left hand. It was a little hard to pull the cork out of a wine bottle atfirst. Then I found out that I could open it easily if I turned the bottle rather thanthe cork. My left hand gradually gained strength and dexterity.

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Prologue

One day I set out to ride the Shinkansen to conduct a concert.

Theconcert on that day happened to be an event during the general assembly of theJapanese Association of Medical Sciences, and it was performed by the Aichi
Medical Association Orchestra. Many doctors were members of the amateurorchestra. So, a great argument started when they saw my right arm disabled.
After the rehearsal, the doctors discussed whether or not I should keep my rightarm wrapped tight. “Although it is dislocated, holding the arm immobile would
cause her to lose muscle activity, and it might cause some hindrance for her
conducting career in the future. So, she should just fix the shoulder and leave
the other parts free to move.” “No, it would be better to keep the whole shoulderand arm fixed just in case.” In the end, I decided just to fix my right shoulder
while keeping the right arm and hand free to move. Now I think it was the rightchoice. Nevertheless, it was still inconvenient. Many concerned friends
contacted me. It was not funny that a conductor had dislocated her rightshoulder. They thought I must have been discouraged. But actually I was fine.
I was just busy doing all I could do, since it took more time and energy to do
everything with my left hand alone.
For conducting, when I could notcommunicate with the orchestra with my left hand only, I exaggerated my body
movements to express what I wanted. I shook my head. I communicated withmy facial expressions. I maximized everything I could utilize, which was anincredible experience.
I also learned to change my perspectives. When facing a situation
where I could not do what I used to do such as pulling the cork from a wine bottle,
this led me to look at it from another angle. When I dried my hair, instead ofmoving the hair dryer, I moved my head while holding the dryer still. When I
wore a kimono in a hotel, instead of wrapping my kimono with the waist strap, Imoved my body so that I could wrap myself in the kimono. I spent each day ininconvenience, but I had never experienced such refreshing moments in mysenses before.
The accident happened in 1995, the same year when a disastrous
earthquake hit the Kobe and Awaji area, and during the same time when theTokyo subway was attacked with sarin chemical. While visiting the hospital for
regular checks, I felt that my injury of dislocation was nothing, compared withothers who were there. As I watched people living in more difficult situations
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with wheelchairs, I felt how fortunate I was. To live is the first priority for my life,and my position as a conductor allows me to live such a life.
What a fortunate life I am living each day to be involved with music, myfavorite thing. The dislocation of my shoulder was a chance for my perspectives
in music and life to change. I had been striving as a proud and stubborn
conductor. But because of my accident, I changed, becoming a conductor more
involved with people through music.

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