Name __________________________________________________Class _____________________

Name __________________________________________________The Greatest Invention Paragraph

Class _____________________ACTIVITY

Original Writing PracticeName _____________________________ Class _______________“Invention” Paragraph

SCORE:/40

Rewrite your paragraph in the box below. Please correct any mistakes found during peer-editing. As you write, be sure to use the Paragraph Checklist below.
Title: _________________________________________PARAGRAPH CHECKLIST
STYLE

1

2

3

4

5

3

4

5

c Is there an appropriate title?
c Is the first sentence indented?
c Do the sentences follow each other?
TOPIC SENTENCE

1

2c Is there a topic sentence?
c Is the topic sentence appropriate? (clear, general)
BODY SENTENCES

2

4

6

8

10

c Are there 3 or more reasons to fully support the
topic sentence?
c Do supporting sentences relate to topic sentence?
c Is enough support given for each reason? (example,
details, an explanation, etc.)
c Are transition words used correctly? (first, second,
next, finally, therefore, etc.)
CONCLUDING SENTENCE

1

2

3

4

5

c Is there a concluding sentence?
c Do the topic and the concluding sentences match?
GRAMMAR/SPELLING

2

4

6

8

10

c Do the subjects and verbs agree?
c Are singular and plural words used correctly?
c Is the correct tense used? (past, present, future)c Is the punctuation correct? (periods, commas, etc.)
c Is every word spelled correctly?
OVERALL FLUENCY

1

2

3

Word Count ___________(140-180)

4

5

EDITNG CIRCLE
Use a different color pen for editing.

Round 1

 Is there a title?
 Is the first sentence indented?
 Do the sentences follow each other?

(If there is no title, write
an original title yourself.)Round 2

 Is there a topic sentence?
 Is the topic sentence clear?
 Is there a conclusion sentence?
 Do the topic and conclusion
sentences match?

1. Put a BOX around the
topic and conclusion
sentences.

BODY SENTENCES

Round 3

 Are three or more reasons/main
points to support topic sentence?
 Do all supporting sentences connect
to topic?
 Does every main point have example,
details, or an explanation?
 TRANSITION WORDS?

GRAMMAR/SPELLING

Round 4

 Subjects/Verbs
 Singular/Plural Correct tense (past, present, future) Punctuation
 SPELLING!!!

2. Number the main
points.
(#1, #2, #3, etc.)
3. Next, circle thetransition words.

(Work together with yourgroup. Use a dictionary,and PLEASE ask theteacher if you have aquestion.)

“Invention” Paragraph FINAL DRAFT
Rewrite your paragraph in the box below. Please correct any mistakes.

Name________________________Class ________________________
Word Count __________________________________________________________________________

Plan Your ParagraphName:	
  _____________________________	
  Class:	
  _____________________________	
  For	
  each	  topic,	
  write	  a	
  topic	
  sentence,	
  give	  three	  or	
  more	  reasons,	
  and	
  support	
  each	  reason	
  with	  examples,	
  details,	
  etc.	
  
A. Topic:	
  	
  If	
  you	
  were	  in	  a	  forest,	
  ALONE,	
  and	
  you	
  could	
  have	  only	  ONE	
  survival	
  item,	
  what	  would	
  you	
  choose?	
  Give	
  three	  reasons	
  to	
  support	
  your	  answer.	
  Topic	
  Sentence:	  	  	
  (EXAMPLE:	
  	
  If	
  I	
  were	  alone	  in	  a	
  forest,	
  I	
  would	
  want	  to	
  have	  (a)	
  .	
  .	
  .	
  as	
  my	
  one	
  survival	
  item.)	
  Reason:	
  

1	
  

2	
  

3	
  

Support:	
  

•

•

•

•

•

•

B. Topic:	
  	
  If	
  you	
  could	
  only	  choose	  to	
  eat	
  one	
  food	  for	  the	  rest	  of	
  your	  life,	
  what	  would	
  you	
  choose	
  and	
  why?	
  Topic	
  Sentence:	
  Reason:	
  

1	
  

2	
  

3	
  

Support:	
  

•

•

•

•

•

•

C. Topic:	
  	
  What	  is	
  your	  favorite	
  day	  of	
  the	
  year?	
  	
  Give	  three	  reasons.	
  Topic	
  Sentence:	
  Reason:	
  

1	
  

2	
  

3	
  

Support:	
  

•

•

•

•

•

•

D. Topic:	
  	
  If	
  you	
  could	
  be	
  any	
  animal,	
  which	  animal	
  would	
  you	
  choose?	
  	
  Give	  three	  reasons	
  to	
  support	
  your	  opinion.	
  Topic	
  Sentence:	
  Reason:	
  

1	
  

2	
  

3	
  

Support:	
  

•

•

•

•

•

•

E. Topic:	
  	
  What	  is	
  the	  best	  country	
  for	
  studying	
  abroad?	
  	
  Why	  do	
  you	
  think	
  so?	
  Topic	
  Sentence:	
  Reason:	
  

1	
  

2	
  

3	
  

Support:	
  

•

•

•

•

•

•

F. Topic:	
  	
  Where	
  would	
  you	
  like	  to	
  spend	  your	  vacation,	
  on	
  a	
  beach,	
  in	
  the	
  mountains,	
  in	
  a	
  big	
  city,	
  or	
  in	
  the	
  country?	
  	
  Choose	
  one	
  and	
  give	  three	  reasons	
  to	
  support	
  your	  choice.	
  Topic	
  Sentence:	
  Reason:	
  

1	
  

2	
  

3	
  

Support:	
  

•

•

•

•

•

•

IN-CLASS Writing TEST
Choose Topic A or B or C. Write a paragraph about the topic you choose. (Words: 100—150)

Name:

SCORE:Class:/40

TOPIC A: What is your favorite season of the year, spring, summer, winter, or fall?
TOPIC B: In your opinion, what is the best country for studying abroad?
TOPIC C: What is the best place to live, in a big city or a small town?

_____________________________________________________

Scoring Rubric (teacher)
STYLE

1

2

3

4

5

4

5

 There is an appropriate title.
 The first sentence is indented.
 Sentences follow each other.
TOPIC SENTENCE

1

2

3

 There is a topic sentence.
 Topic is clear, general, and appropriate.
BODY SENTENCES 2

4

6

8

10

 3 or more reasons properly support topic.
 Supporting sentences relate to topic.
 Reasons are supported: examples/details.
 Transition words used correctly.
CONCLUSION

1

2

3

4

5

 There is a concluding sentence.
 Topic and conclusion sentences match.
GRAMMAR

2

4

6

8

10

4

5

 Subject/Verb agreement
 Singular/Plural agreement
 Verb tense Punctuation
 Spelling
OVERALL FLUENCYWORD COUNT:

1

2

3

Name _________________________________________________ Class _________________

Opinion ParagraphMatthew Barbee, Kwansei Gakuin, 20143Name ______________________________________________ Class ____________________

Write a paragraph about a STRONG opinion that you have. Include THREE facts to support your opinion.
You should also give ONE point about the opposite opinion, and then make a counterargument against it.

Don’t forget to:• Choose an interesting topic. Choose an opinion that your really believe. You may also use the titles in
Activity 4 to help you.
• Write a topic sentence that is an opinion NOT a fact.
• Use three facts to support your opinion. You may use the internet to help you or to get ideas.
• Use correct paragraph style. (indent, transitions, and correct punctuation, spelling, and grammar.)• Give your paragraph a title.

• 200 words___________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________Name _____________________________ Class _______________

Opinion Paragraph TEST
Rewrite your paragraph in the box below. As you write, be sure to use the Paragraph Checklist. [WORD COUNT: ____________ ]SCORING RUBRIC
Title: ________________________________________________STYLE
c Is there a title?
c Is proper paragraph style used?
c Transition words?
TOPIC SENTENCEc Is there a topic sentence?
c Does the topic sentence state an opinion?
BODY SENTENCES
c
c
c
c
c

Are there 3 reasons to support the topic sentence?
Does every supporting sentence relate to the topic?
Is there enough detail (example, explanation)?
Is there an OPPOSITE opinion?
Do you ATTACK the opposite opinion?

CONCLUDING SENTENCEc Is there a concluding sentence?
c Do the topic and the concluding sentences match?
GRAMMAR/SPELLING
c
c
c
c
c

Do the subjects and verbs agree?
Are singular and plural words used correctly?
Is the correct tense used? (past, present, future)
Is the punctuation correct? (periods, commas, etc.)
Is every word spelled correctly?

CONTENTc How strong is the opinion?
c Overall writing fluency

Score :

1
1

2
2

3
3

4
4

5
5

Name _____________________________ Class _______________

Opinion Paragraph TEST PREP
TOPICS:A) It is better to live on your own than with your family.
B) Living in Tokyo is better than living in Osaka.
C) Public transportation is better than having a car.
D) The best way to learn English is to watch English movies.

E) Natural hair is better than getting a perm and using hair dye.
F) Breakfast is the most important meal of the day.
G) Japan is the best country in the world.
H) It is better to go to a game center than karaoke.

Choose FIVE of the topics above and use them to complete the following charts.

1. Topic:
What are 3 reasons to support your opinion?
(Try to use facts to make a stronger opinion.)

What are 2 opposite opinions against the topic?
However, some people say:

a.
b.
c.

a.
b.

Choose one of the opposite opinions that you think is weak. Why do you think it is a bad opinion?

2. Topic:
What are 3 reasons to support your opinion?
(Try to use facts.)

What are 2 opposite opinions against the topic?
However, some people say:

a.
b.
c.

a.
b.

Choose one of the opposite opinions that you think is weak. Why do you think it is a bad opinion?

3. Topic:
What are 3 reasons to support your opinion?
(Try to use facts.)

What are 2 opposite opinions against the topic?
However, some people say:

a.
b.
c.

a.
b.

Choose one of the opposite opinions that you think is not strong. Why do you think it is a bad opinion?

4. Topic:
What are 3 reasons to support your opinion?
(Try to use facts.)

What are 2 opposite opinions against the topic?
However, some people say:

a.
a.

b.

b.

c.

Choose one of the opposite opinions that you think is weak. Why do you think it is a bad opinion?

5. Topic:
What are 3 reasons to support your opinion?
(Try to use facts.)

What are 2 opposite opinions against the topic?
However, some people say:

a.
a.

b.

b.

c.

Choose one of the opposite opinions that you think is weak. Why do you think it is a bad opinion?

OUTLINE
Choose one of the five topics that you chose. Use one of them to write the outline below.
I. Introduction Sentence: _____________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________
II. Body Sentences:
A. First Reason: _______________________________________________________________________________________
1. Support/Detail: ___________________________________________________________________________________
2. Support/Detail: ___________________________________________________________________________________
B. Second Reason: _____________________________________________________________________________________
1. Support/Detail: ___________________________________________________________________________________
2. Support/Detail: ___________________________________________________________________________________
C. First Reason: _______________________________________________________________________________________
1. Support/Detail: ___________________________________________________________________________________
2. Support/Detail: ___________________________________________________________________________________
D. OPPOSITE OPINION: _________________________________________________________________________________
E. OPPOSITE OPINION ATTACK: __________________________________________________________________________
III. Conclusion Sentence: ______________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________Name _____________________________ Class _______________

Opinion Paragraph TEST

Score :

Write an opinion paragraph about one of the following topics. Try to use facts to support your opinion.
A. Living in Osaka is better than living in Tokyo.

C. The best way to learn English is to study abroad.

B. Taking the train is better than having a car.

D. Eating breakfast is the most important meal of the day.

SCORING RUBRIC
Title: ________________________________________________STYLE (20 points)ccccIs there a title?
Is the paragraph indented?
Do the lines follow behind each other?
Are transition words used well?

TOPIC SENTENCE (10 points)c Is there a topic sentence?
c Does the topic sentence state an opinion?
BODY SENTENCES (3 points)
c
c
c
c
c

Are there 3 reasons to support the topic sentence?
Do supporting sentences relate to the topic?
Is there enough detail (examples, explanations)?
Is there an OPPOSITE opinion?
Do you ATTACK the opposite opinion?

CONCLUDING SENTENCE (10 points)c Is there a concluding sentence?
c Do the topic and the concluding sentences match?
GRAMMAR/SPELLING (25 points overall)c Subject and verb agreement, singular and pluralwords, tense, punctuation, spelling, etc.

CONTENT (10 points)
c Strength of the opinion (facts)

1

2

3

4

5

c Overall writing fluency

1

2

3

4

5

Narrative ParagraphName: ________________________________

Brainstorm: What is a challenging or embarrassing situation that has happened to you? Think about
three events that happened in your life. What are they?
1.
2.
3.

Now, choose one event that you want to write about make an outline below:

Topic Sentence (Beginning Sentences)
Introduce the challenging situation,and tell when and where it took
place.
(Tip: Use interesting words to get
the reader’s attention.)

Supporting Sentences (Middle Sentences)
Background: Give briefbackground information about thechallenging situation.
(Tip: Tell how you got into thesituation.)
Details: Explain what happened
first.
Explain what happened next. (Tip:
Give specific details, including
sensory or emotional details.)
Outcome: Explain how thesituation ended.

Concluding Sentence (Ending Sentences)
Briefly summarize the story andtell what you learned from theexperience.

Narrative Paragraph

Name __________________________________
Word Count ______________________________________________________________________________________________
Title____________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________

Peer Editing aFirst Draft

Narrative Paragraphs

Writer: ____________________________________________
Peer Editor: _________________________________________
Title: ______________________________________________

1. What is your favorite part of the paragraph?
______________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________

2. What challenge did the writer face?
______________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________

3. When did the event occur?
______________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________

4. Who was involved in the event?
______________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________

5. Circle any details about what the writer heard, saw, felt, smelled, or tasted. Which of thesedetails is clearest or most effective?
______________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________

6. Which part of the event needs more details?
______________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________

7. Underline the concluding sentence. What did the writer learn from the experience?
______________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________

8. What suggestions or questions do you have for the writer?
______________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________

9. Read the paragraph again and check for grammar or spelling mistakes.
Especially, subject-verb agreement, verb tense, capitalization, missing words, parts you don’t
understand (?), and spelling mistakes. Use your symbol guide.

Narrative Paragraph

Name:

Class:

Criteria
The paragraph effectively responds to the writing task.
Paragraph format (indent, wrapped-lines, title) is correct.

1

2

Points3

45Introduction sentence gives information about the event (when, where,
why, who, what)

1

2

3

4

5

Supporting sentences explain the sequence of events and what
happened.

2

4

6

8

10

Concluding sentences explain what the writer learned from theexperience.

1

2

3

4

10

2

4

6

8

10

1

2

3

4

10

The writer uses proper grammar, spelling, and punctuation.
Paragraph is well organized (topic, support, conclusion).
Overall English fluency.

Total Score:

Narrative Paragraph

Name:

/50

Class:

Criteria
The paragraph effectively responds to the writing task.
Paragraph format (indent, wrapped-lines, title) is correct.

1

2

Points3

Introduction sentence gives information about the event (when, where,
why, who, what)

1

2

3

4

5

Supporting sentences explain the sequence of events and what
happened.

2

4

6

8

10

Concluding sentences explain what the writer learned from theexperience.

1

2

3

4

10

2

4

6

8

10

1

2

3

4

10

The writer uses proper grammar, spelling, and punctuation.
Paragraph is well organized (topic, support, conclusion).
Overall English fluency.

4

5

Total Score:

Narrative Paragraph

Name:

/50

Class:

Criteria
The paragraph effectively responds to the writing task.
Paragraph format (indent, wrapped-lines, title) is correct.

1

2

Points3

Introduction sentence gives information about the event (when, where,
why, who, what)

1

2

3

4

5

Supporting sentences explain the sequence of events and what
happened.

2

4

6

8

10

Concluding sentences explain what the writer learned from theexperience.

1

2

3

4

10

2

4

6

8

10

1

2

3

4

10

The writer uses proper grammar, spelling, and punctuation.
Paragraph is well organized (topic, support, conclusion).
Overall English fluency.

Total Score:

4

5

/50

Name ________________________________________________ Class ____________________Example Paragraph 1

Example Paragraph 2

3. Why does the author say the third step is difficult?
____________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________
4. What are the “three pieces of information” mentioned in the paragraph?
____________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________Example Paragraph 3

1.

Underline the first sentence. What word connects the reader to the topic? ________________

2. Double underline the topic sentence. What words let you know that the paragraph will
explain a process?
____________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________
3. According to this paragraph, what are the fundamental steps in the process of doing well inclass?
____________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________
4. What kind of information does the last sentence of the paragraph contain? Why did thewriter include this sentence?
____________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________

TRANSITION WORDS/PHRASESIDENTIFYING TRANSITION WORDS AND PHRASESA) Circle the transition words or phrases in Example Paragraph 3 on page 4.
B) Complete the paragraph. Use the time-order and conclusion signals from the box. Capitalize and punctuatethem as needed. Use each signal once.

SENTENCE STRUCTURE CHALLENGE
Good writers use a variety of sentence patterns. In their paragraphs, they sometimes use simple sentences because
they are direct, clear, and easy to read. At other times, they combine simple sentences to show their readers theconnection between ideas. Good writers also know that a mixture of sentence types can help to keep their readersinterested.

IDENTIFYING COMPLEX SENTENCES

Name:Class:
Choose a topic from the list below and write a process paragraph about that topic.

[150 ~ 200 Words]

TOPICS FOR WRITING
A) What do you do to get a driver’s license in Japan?
B) How do you get your dream job? What is the full process?
C) What do you do if you lost your wallet on the bus?

D) How can a tourist enjoy Kansai with only two days?
E) How can someone learn a foreign language?
F) How can a freshman at KGU enjoy their university life?

__________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________

SECOND DRAFT Process Paragraph
WORD COUNT: __________________Name:
Class:_____________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________
Score:_________________________________________________________________________________________________________________/50
Scoring Rubric [for teacher only] __________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________
Paragraph
Style (title, indent, sentence format)
2 4 6 8 10
Organization (topic sentence, supporting sentences, concluding sentences, transition words)
2 4 6 8 10
Clarity(understandable, steps are clear, missing steps, need more details, examples, explanations, etc.)
2 4 6 8 10_________________________________________________________________________________________________________________
Grammar (capitalization, punctuation, subject-verb, singular/plural, pronouns, grammar fluency)
2 4 6 8 10
Fluency (The writing is natural and easy to read, the sentences are complex and the flow is native-like.)
2 4 6 8 10__________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________

Writing Test 2 Preparation
A) How to make a friend from a foreign country.
B) How to improve your health and lose weight.
C) How to travel from Sanda to Shinjuku.

As a Group

Name: _________________________________ Class: _____________D) How to make a photo album OR sign board for a friend.
E) How to cook okonomiyaki OR takoyaki.
F) How to get a high score on the TOEIC test.

1

2

Topic Sentence:

Topic Sentence:

Topic Sentence:

Step 1

Step 1

Step 1

Step 2

Step 2

Step 2

Step 3

Step 3

Step 3

Step 4

Step 4

Step 4

Step 5

Step 5

Step 5

Step 6

Step 6

Step 6

Step 7

Step 7

Step 7

Concluding Sentence:

Concluding Sentence:

Concluding Sentence:

List of helpful transition words or phrases:A) How to make a friend from a foreign country.
B) How to improve your health and lose weight.
C) How to travel from Sanda to Tokyo.
D) Make a handmade photo album of your friends.
E) How to cook okonomiyaki OR takoyaki.
F) How to get a high score on the TOEIC test.

3

4

Original Topic

Topic Sentence:

Topic Sentence:

Topic Sentence:

Step 1

Step 1

Step 1

Step 2

Step 2

Step 2

Step 3

Step 3

Step 3

Step 4

Step 4

Step 4

Step 5

Step 5

Step 5

Step 6

Step 6

Step 6

Step 7

Step 7

Step 7

Concluding Sentence:

Concluding Sentence:

Concluding Sentence:

List of helpful transition words or phrases:

SELF-CHECK

Name: ___________________________________________ Class: _________________The title of my process paragraph is ____________________________________________________
My word count is _____________________. It is 150 ~ 200 words.

Paragraph Style
 My paragraph looks like a paragraph.
 My paragraph has an indent on the first line.
 The sentences follow each other, not line-by-line.

□ yes □ no
□ yes □ no
□ yes □ noContent and Organization
 My paragraph is a process paragraph about one of the topics.
 My paragraph begins with a good introduction.
It shows my connection to the topic or connects the reader to the topic.
 My paragraph has a good topic sentence.
 The steps in my process are complete and in order.
 My paragraph uses transition words and phrases.
 My paragraph has enough details and examples for anyone to understand.
 The concluding sentence states the same idea as the topic sentence.
It also tells the purpose of the paragraph.

□ yes □ no
□ yes
□ yes
□ yes
□ yes
□ yes

□ no
□ no
□ no
□ no
□ no

□ yes □ no

Punctuation, Grammar, and Spelling Every sentences ends with correct punctuation (ex. period, question mark).
 I used commas correctly.
 I checked subject-verb agreement.
 I used past, present, and future tense correctly.
 All singular and plural nouns are used correctly.
 I double-checked my spelling with a dictionary.

□ yes
□ yes
□ yes
□ yes
□ yes
□ yes

□ no
□ no
□ no
□ no
□ no
□ no

Sentence Structure I used a mixture of long and short sentences to give my writing variety.
 I used complex sentences (sentences with dependent and independent
clauses.) This will improve your fluency. You can review complex sentenceson pages 7-9.

□ yes □ no
□ yes □ no

PEER-EDITING

Author: ___________________________________________Class: ___________________

PEER-EDITOR #1: Name: _________________________________________

Read this student’s paragraph and answer the following peer-editing questions:
1. After you read your partner’s paragraph, can you understand everything?
□ yes □ no
If you can’t understand something, underline that part of their paper and write question marks (???) on their paper.
2. Does the paragraph have a good topic sentence?
□ yes □ no □ needs improvement
If yes, copy the topic sentence here. Circle the words that tell you this is a process paragraph.
_________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________
3. Does the paragraph have a concluding sentence?
□ yes □ no □ needs improvement
4. Does it match the topic sentence and tell the purpose of the paragraph?
□ yes □ no □ needs improvement
5. What do you like best about this paragraph? Write positive comments below: □_________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________

PEER-EDITOR #2: Name: _________________________________________

Read this student’s paragraph and answer the following peer-editing questions:
1. How many steps are there? Number: _________________ □2. Does the paragraph have a variety of transition words or phrases?
Write the transition words that the author used here:□ yes □ no □ needs improvement

Write the transition words the author uses here:

3. Would you like more information about any step? Or are some steps missing? □ yes □ no
If yes, make a comment to the author or ask questions about what you want to know:_________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________
4. Is the subject-verb agreement correct? Underline and write the symbol.
□ yes □ no □ needs improvement
5. Are all singular/plural nouns used correctly? Underline and write the symbol. □ yes □ no □ needs improvement
6. What do you like best about this paragraph? Write positive comments below: □_________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________
Give this paper back to the original person

Write your Second Draft:

To the original author, check all the comments and marks made by the peer-editors. Rewrite your paragraph on an attached looseleaf paper.

DON’T FORGET:

 Write a title.
 Write the new word count.
 Write neatly.
 Attach the Second Draft on top.

Process ParagraphWriting Test 2

Name:Class:

Write a process paragraph. You may use any topic of your choice that you have not written about before. It may be original, or you may
use your test preparation sheet to help you. You should have an original title, 5 or more steps, and be 180 ~ 220 words.
Be sure to read your paper before you finish, check your mistakes, and write neatly.

Word Count:_____________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________
Score:_________________________________________________________________________________________________________________
Scoring
Rubric [for teacher only] _________________________________________________________________________________________________________/50
Paragraph
Style (title, indent, sentence format, is a process paragraph)
2 4 6 8 10_________________________________________________________________________________________________________________
Organization (topic sentence, supporting sentences, concluding sentences, transition words, time order)
2 4 6 8 10
Clarity (understandable, steps are clear, missing steps, need more details, examples, explanations, etc.)
2 4 6 8 10_________________________________________________________________________________________________________________
Grammar(capitalization, punctuation, subject-verb, singular/plural, pronouns, grammar fluency)
2 4 6 8 10
Fluency (The writing is natural and easy to read, the sentences are complex and the flow is native-like.)
2 4 6 8 10

Narrative Essay

Name:Class:

A narrative essay tells a story. It uses descriptive language to tell the beginning, middle, and end of an event. It has
an introduction that engages the reader’s interest, details about the main event or action in the story, and aconclusion that describes the outcome.

Narrative Essay Organization
INTRODUCTION
Hook
Background

The hook gets the reader’s attention with an interesting or surprising fact.
The background tells the history or what happened before the action.
The thesis sentence prepares the reader for the main action of the story, but it
doesn’t tell the whole story (just a “hint” about the main action).

Thesis

BODY PARAGRAPHSThe body paragraphs tell the main story. They use a lot of details to bring the story to life.

Situation
Rising Action
ClimaxThe situation paragraph describes the when, where, what happens in the story,
and why the main event is happening, step by step. It often uses time order.
The rising action is the main events leading to the climax. It also uses timeorder and many details.
The climax is the main action, the surprise, or the height of the action.

CONCLUSION
The conclusion paragraph tells (1) what happened after the main event, (2) about a lesson thewriter learned, and (3) how the writer’s life is changed now.

ACTIVITY 1

Identifying Parts of a Narrative Essay

Match the parts of a narrative essay to the examples on the right.

1. Hook
2. Background
3. Thesis Sentence

a. I learned that many things in Japan look the same as in the U.K., but they
are truly Japanese, and we should appreciate them. Now, travelling ismore enjoyable.
b. Getting off the airplane, and walking the streets of Tokyo, Japan was very
exciting, but it also felt like home.
c. Japan is known as “Land of the Rising Sun.”

4. Situationd. When I was young, I always thought Japan was an exotic country withinteresting customs. I always wanted to go to Japan.

5. Rising Action

e. I didn’t know that I was going to learn an important lesson because of asimple pastry.

6. Climaxf.

7. Conclusion

g. I finally bit into the pastry and was shocked to find it was not strawberry.

I was hungry and I wanted something to eat. I found a bakery, and I saw astrawberry jam pastry.

Narrative Essay Organization: My First Japanese Pastry
Paragraph

1

INTRO

2
3

Hook

• Japan is known as “Land of the Rising Sun.”

Background• I always thought Japan was an exotic country withinteresting customs. I always wanted to go to Japan.

Thesis• Eating a pastry taught me an important lesson.

Situation

BODY

Rising Action
Climax

4

CONCLUSION• Getting off the airplane, and walking the streets of Tokyo,
Japan was very exciting, but it also felt the same as home.
• I was hungry and I wanted something cheap and delicious• I found a bakery.
• I saw a strawberry jam pastry like back home.
• I bit into the pastry and was surprised to find it was not
strawberry jam.
• I began to like sweet bean paste.
• I learned that many things in Japan look the same as in
the U.K., but they are truly Japanese, and we should
appreciate them.
• Now, travelling is more enjoyable.

ACTIVITY 2

Reading a Student Essay

Read the essay. Respond to the essay by answering the following questions.

My First Foreign Friend
My first foreign friend broke my heart. However, before I could have a foreign friend, I needed totravel aboard first. I have always wanted to go abroad and make friends around the world. Last winter, I
was able to study abroad for four weeks in Toronto. While I was studying in Toronto, I met a Canadian
girl named Jem. She told me that she wanted to make Japanese friends, so I was happy to talk to her. I
was also happy to talk to her because she is so beautiful. Jem is half white and half Filipino, and I had
never seen anyone like her before. It is safe to say that I fell in love with her at first sight, but not
everything is meant to be. (115)
In the beginning of our friendship, I was able to meet Jem often because we were language
exchange partners. Jem helped me study English, and I helped her study Japanese. Gradually we became
more and more friendly, so I invited her to go out to eat dinner with me. We went to a restaurant with her
friends who also study Japanese. I talked a lot with her and her friends in English, and we ate katsudon. It
is very delicious. Having dinner together made me very happy, and I think that my language skill
improved. (100)One day, I went to watch an American football game with my Kwansei Gakuin friends. At thegame, I saw Jem with another student. I said hello, and I asked about her friend. She said “He is myboyfriend.” That is, she had a boyfriend. I was surprised, and I was disappointed in love. Furthermore,
her boyfriend was also Japanese and was studying abroad like me. I was sad because of that unbelievablefact. At that moment, I thought that my experience in other country was sad. (95)
At last, the day I went back to Japan, I heard from Jem by email. In her email, she wrote, “thankyou for being my friend. I want to meet you and speak in Japanese when I go to Japan this summer.’’ Heremail really made me smile. I forgot about my feelings at the football game and remembered all the greattimes I had in Toronto. Overall, I learned that life is made up of good and bad memories, but it is mostimportant to remember the good ones. (90)
Total Words: 400

1.

Why is the background information in the introduction important to the story?

2. How did the writer and Jem become friends? (What is the situation?)

3. What happened before the writer’s heart was broken? (What is the rising action?)

4.

What broke the writer’s heart? (What is the climax of the story?)

5. What did the writer learn? Was it a positive lesson or a negative lesson?

ACTIVITY 3

Writing a Great Hook

The hook is the first sentence of your essay. The
purpose of a hook is to get the reader’s attention. There
are 5 types of hooks:

•
•
•
•
•

Shocking statement
Interesting fact
Statistic
Question
Quote

A. Below is the introduction to a narrative essay. Read the paragraph and then underline the hook.
I cannot live without pizza. If I go very long without eating a hot delicious slice of
pizza, I become sick. When I lived in the United States, I ate a whole pizza every week.
But when I started living in Japan, I forgot about eating pizza. I was happy eating
delicious Japanese foods at first, but I eventually began to crave a hot slice of bread,sauce, and cheese. After living in Japan for six months, I ordered Japanese pizza for the
first time.
1. What type of hook do you think is used? ____________________________________________
2. Why do you think a good hook is important?
______________________________________________________________________________

B. Look at the examples of different types of hooks below. Work together in a small group to write your own
hooks. The essay topic is “Japanese pizza.”

Hooks

Examples

Shocking
statement

I love pizza more than
my family.

Interesting
Fact

Pizza was firstinvented in Italy, butmodern pizza haschanged a lot.

Statistic

The average Americaneats 27 pizzas a year.

Question

What is your favorite
food in the world?
Mine is pizza.

Quote

Einstein once said,“Pizza is the mostperfect food.”

Write your own:

ACTIVITY 4

Reading a Student Essay

Read the essay. Respond to the essay by answering the following questions.

My First Time Cooking
When I was ten years old, I almost died in the kitchen. One day, I was the only one home because
my parents went to an elementary school to teach, and my big sister was staying at her friend’s house. I
was bored, and I played video games a whole lot. In the early evening, I became hungry, but there wasnothing to eat. I looked in our refrigerator, but there was only some vegetables and medium spicy curryroux. When I saw that, I thought, “my mother can make curry easily, so I can make curry, too.” I decided
to make curry by myself, but it would be dangerous because I had never cooked anything until then. (115)
At first, I started to cook some rice. Second, I cut onions, but I couldn’t stop crying for 20
minutes. After I stopped crying, I cut carrots. I did well partway, but I cut my middle finger because I
didn’t fold my fingers away from the knife. I felt foolish. I almost gave up, but I continued to cook. Next,
I peeled potatoes with a peeler. I thought it was safe, but I was wrong. My nail was skinned a little by thepeeler. After the vegetables, I prepared a deep pot and started to fry vegetables and chicken. However,another problem happened. Before I fried them, I forgot to grease the bottom of the pot and it burned. I
moved them from the burned pot to another one, and I started to fry them again. There were a lot of
problems, but I completed making curry at last. (150)
After I made curry, I looked at my hand, and it was all cut up. There was some adhesive tape on
it, but my heart was full of accomplishment. When I ate MY curry, it was very tasty. Later, when mymother got home, she ate my curry and said, “this is so delicious.” She looked so happy, and I was so
happy, too. After that, my father came back home, and he ate my curry, too. He was surprised that I had
made curry by myself. My parents were happy, so I wanted to cook again. (95)
These days, I often cook curry and rice by myself. Now that I know how to make it properly, I
have become much better at it. I think it is good for us to try new things. Even if if we are not perfect atfirst, we can become better and better. As they say, “practice makes perfect.” In conclusion, while my firsttime cooking was terrible, it became an invaluable memory that I will never forget. (75)
Total Words: 435

1. Underline the hook? A. What type of hook is it? B. Write a new hook for the essay using a different type.
A.
B.
2. Why was the writer home alone? What is some other background information of the story?

3. How three problems did the writer have when making curry?

4. What was the climax of the story? (Why were the writer’s parent’s happy?)

5. What did the writer learn? Was it a positive lesson or a negative lesson?

ACTIVITY 5

Time Adverbs

To sequence events in a narrative essay, we use time adverbs such as then, finally, eventually, after that, later, andthen. They usually appear at the beginning of the sentence and followed by a comma.
Then is an exception. It is not followed by a comma.
• Our train was running late. Finally, it arrived.
• We got on the train. Then we realized that we didn’t have money for the ticket.

Identifying Time Adverbs
Reread the student essays, My First Foreign Friend and My First Time Cooking. List time adverbs that you find:______________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________

ACTIVITY 6

Subordinating Conjunctions

We also use subordinating conjunctions to sequence events such as before, as soon as, after, when, and while incomplex sentences as connectors. Complex sentences contain a main clause (independent) and a dependent
clause. The dependent clauses give extra information about the main clause, for example, where or when it
happened.
Subordinating conjunctions tell when something happened. When a subordinating conjunction comes are thebeginning of the sentences, we use a comma. No comma is needed if it comes at the end.

Time Clause

Main Clause

After our parents left the house,
Before my brother was born,

we had a party.
I was on only child.

Main Clause

Time Clause

We had a party
I was an only childafter our parents left the house.
before my brother was born.

Using Subordinating Conjunctions
Combine each pair of sentences into one complex sentence. Use the subordinating conjunctions in (parentheses) to clarify
the sentence.

1. People harvested apples. They cooked and stored them in glass jars. (after)_______________________________________________________________________________________
2. I ate the main course. I ate my salad. (before)_______________________________________________________________________________________
3. She applied for the job. She was accepted. (As soon as)_______________________________________________________________________________________

Narrative Essay: First Draft

WRITING

Now its time to write your narrative essay. Use the following guidelines to help you write.

1. Write a narrative essay about something that you did for your first time in your life. Use many
details to make the story come alive for the reader.
2. Use an interesting hook. (Try to catch a huge fish!)
3. Be sure to tell the reader what you learned at the end of your story. How has your life changednow?
4. Your title should be: “My First _______________________” (Use Title Style)
5. Your essay must be 4 paragraphs (Intro, Body Paragraphs x 2, Conclusion). You can use the
Narrative Essay Planner below to help you write.
6. Word Count: 350 - 450 words.
7. Type your essay. Follow the teacher’s typing guide.
8. Don’t forget to write your name, student ID, class, and date at the top of your paper.

Narrative Essay Planner
Paragraph

Hook

1

INTRO

Background

Thesis2

Situation

BODY

3

RisingActionClimax

4

CONCLUSION

This paper belongs to:

PEER EDITINGThis paper is being checked by:

Exchange papers and answer the following questions about your classmate’s essay.

1. Underline the hook? A. What type of hook is it? If there is no hook or you think it could be better, what isyour suggestion?

2. What is the background information of the story? What happened before the beginning of the story?

3. Underline the thesis sentence. If there is no thesis or you think it could be better, what is your suggestion?

4. What happened at the beginning of the story? Where was the writer? What was the writer doing?

5. What transition words or time words does the author use? List them below. If they need more time words
for clarity, please make a memo on their paper.
____________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________

6. What was the climax of the story?

7.

What did the writer learn? How did the event change the writer’s life?

8.

Overall, how do you like the essay? Give a comment to the writer.

9.

How can the writer make it better? Make a suggestion here.

10. Grammar and Spelling. Work in a group to check the essay for mistakes. Underline and add a correction

symbol if you find any mistakes. Write a question mark (?) if you don’t understand something.

Typing Guide
All Margins: 30mm
Font: Times New Roman, 12 point
Heading: Top Right. Include name, student ID number, class name/number/teacher, date
Title: Centered, Bold. Use title style capitalization.
Line Style: Essay must be DOUBLE-SPECED (行間: 2.0). Use formatting icon, do not hit return between lines.
Indent: Use “tab” key. The first line of each paragraph must be indented.
Word Count: At the end of the paper.

Name: _______________________________ SID#: _________________ Class: _______________

L Below Expectations L

0
Hook
Thesisstatement
Introduction(para 1)
Rising Action(para 2)
Climax(para 3)Conclusion

1

J Excellent J34o Hook captures the reader’sattention wello Missing thesis

o Present but does not effectively
introduce the contents of the essayo Introduces the essay effectively

o Few examples/detailso Contains information notconnected to the backgroundo Some examples/detailso Background info is present

o Many thorough and clear detailso Background info well prepares
the reader for the storyo Paragraph does not describe therising action wello Describes the rising actiono Introduces the climax too earlyo No climax presento Climax is present

o Describes rising action withmany details and leads into theclimaxo Climax is clear and effectivewith many detailso Concluding sentences missingo Short and not appropriateo Concluding sentences rephrases
the thesis statemento Missing informationo Some mistakes, but they don’t
impact the ability to understandthe paragraphClarity andOrganizationo There are several problems with
understanding and clarityo Ideas are not well organizedo Few transition wordso Concluding sentences tell what
the writer learned from thisexperienceo Few mistakes in grammar,
spelling, and punctuationo There are some problems witho High level of fluency and clarity
understanding but overall theo Natural and expressive English
meaning is clear
o Good organization and variedo Some transition words
transitions wordso Transition words are present, but
not all specific or variedo Writing is cut into many smaller paragraphso Writing is contained within 4 paragraphso No indenting first line of paragraphso Paragraphs are indentedo Missing title or heading informationo Appropriate title
o Typing guide not followedo Typing Guide followedo Less than 350 words totalo Total words: 350-400

o Total words: 400-450

Name: _______________________________ SID#: _________________ Class: _______________

L Below Expectations L

0
Hook
Thesisstatement
Introduction(para 1)
Rising Action(para 2)
Climax(para 3)Conclusion

1

2

3

/50

J Excellent J45o Hook is presento Hook captures the reader’sattention wello Missing thesis

o Present but does not effectively
introduce the contents of the essayo Introduces the essay effectively

o Few examples/detailso Contains information notconnected to the backgroundo Some examples/detailso Background info is present

o Many thorough and clear detailso Background info well prepares
the reader for the storyo Paragraph does not describe therising action wello Describes the rising actiono Introduces the climax too earlyo No climax presento Climax is present

o Describes rising action withmany details and leads into theclimaxo Climax is clear and effectivewith many detailso Concluding sentences missingo Short and not appropriateo Concluding sentences rephrases
the thesis statemento Missing informationo Some mistakes, but they don’t
impact the ability to understandthe paragrapho Many grammar and spelling
mistakes that make it difficult tounderstand the paragraphClarity andOrganizationo There are several problems with
understanding and clarityo Ideas are not well organizedo Few transition words

Word count

K Satisfactory K

Score:o Missing hook

Grammar andSpelling

Paragraphstyle

5o Hook is present

o Many grammar and spelling
mistakes that make it difficult tounderstand the paragraphWord count2/50

o Missing hook

Grammar andSpelling

Paragraph
style

K Satisfactory K

Score:o Concluding sentences tell what
the writer learned from thisexperienceo Few mistakes in grammar,
spelling, and punctuationo There are some problems witho High level of fluency and clarity
o Natural and expressive English
understanding but overall theo Good organization and varied
meaning is clearo Some transition words
transitions wordso Transition words are present, but
not all specific or variedo Writing is cut into many smaller paragraphso Writing is contained within 4 paragraphso No indenting first line of paragraphso Paragraphs are indentedo Missing title or heading informationo Appropriate title
o Typing guide not followedo Typing Guide followedo Less than 350 words totalo Total words: 350-400

o Total words: 400-450

NAME	
  ___________________________________________________	
  Class	
  _________________________	  In a comparison essay, you can compare ideas, people, different times in history,or other things. The subjects of this kind of essay are two items that are related in someway. You can focus on the similarities between the two items, on the differences, or on
both the similarities and the differences. Your goal is to show your readers how these
items are similar or different, what their strengths and weaknesses are, or what theiradvantages and disadvantages are.

Group Activity: Compare the two pictures below. How are they similar? How are they different?

:

	
  

	
  
	
  
	
  

Paragraphs	
  

1	
  
	
  
2	
  
	
  
3	
  
	
  
4	
  

SUPPORT	  SUPPORT	
  

	
  

	
  
	
  
	
  

	
  
Matthew	
  Barbee,	  2014	
  	
  	
  	
  	
  	
  	
  	
  	
  	
  	
  	
  2	
  

	
  
	
  
	
  
	
  
	
  
	
  
	
  
	
  
	
  
	
  

	
  
	
  

	
  
	
  
	
  
	
  
	
  

Paragraphs	
  

	
  

1	
  
	
  
2	
  
	
  
3	
  
	
  
4	
  
	
  
5	
  

SUPPORT	  SUPPORT	  SUPPORT	
  

	
  

	
  

	
  
	
  
	
  
	
  
	
  
	
  
	
  
	
  
	
  
	
  
	
  
	
  
	
  
	
  
	
  
	
  
	
  
	
  
	
  
	
  
	
  
	
  
	
  
	
  
	
  
	
  
	
  
	
  
	
  
	
  
	
  
	
  

Matthew	
  Barbee,	  2014	
  	
  	
  	
  	
  	
  	
  	
  	
  	
  	
  	
  3	
  

The Weather in Chicago and Miami

The Weather in Chicago
and Miami

1
People usually have very strong opinions about what
constitutes good weather, and one person's idea of good
My cousi n and I recently had a ~ weather may easily be another person's weather nightmare. In.
.
.
fact, my cousin and I recently had a discussion about whether
d1scuss10n about whether his hometown,
his hometown, Chicago, or my hometown, Miami, has better
weather. Our discussion centered on three differences between
Chicago, or my hometown, Miami, has
the weather in our two hometowns.

better weather. Our discussion centeredon three differences between the weather
in our two hometowns. First, ChicagoI

has all four distinct seasons, but Miami
does not. Chicagoans enjoy summer,
fall, winter, and spring weather. Miami,
in contrast, has only two seasons: a very /mild winter and a very long summer.
Another major difference in the weather
between our two cities is that Chicago's
worst weather occurs in the winter. On
average, the high temperature reaches
only around 32 degrees Fahrenheit, andthe low each night goes down to about 20
degrees. Unlike Chicago, the problem in
Miami is not the cold but rather the heat.
In the summer, the daytime temperaturereaches 95 degrees and drops to only 75
or so at night. Finally, they worry about
different weather problems. While a
Ch·
' b·
t
th f
·
icagoan s igges wea er ear is a
blizzard, the biggest weather problem /for them is a hurricane. In the end, welearned that each of our hometowns has
unique weather.
1 paragraph I 12 sentences / 179 words

2
Our first point of discussion was the number of seasons.
Chicago is located in the midwestern part of the United States.
It is also much farther north than Miami is. Chicago has four
seasons: summer, fall, ~i~ter, and spring. These f~ur.seasonsare clearly marked by distmct weather changes. M1am1, on theother hand, is in the southeastern corner of the United States.
Because it is much farther south, near the Caribbean Sea and the
GulfofMexico, Miami is much warmer. Miami has two seasons:a very mild winter and a long, hot summer.
3
We also considered the worst temperatures in bothcities. The worst weather in Chicago occurs in the winter.
On average, the high temperature only reaches around 32
degrees Fahrenheit, and the low each night goes down toabout 20 degrees. In addition, frequent high winds drive theperceived temperature down even more. This combination ofcold and wind, called the wind chill factor, can make life
almost unbearable in Chicago during the winter months.
The problem in Miami is not the cold but rather the heat.
In the summer, the temperature reaches 95 degrees in thedaytime and drops only to 75 or so at night. Combined witha constant humidity of 90 percent or more, the temperature
actually feels significantly warmer.
4
Finally, our two hometowns have different kindsof severe weather. Chicagoans' biggest weather fear is a
blizzard. Blizzards can occur frequently during the frigid
winter months. When a blizzard hits the city, it can dump
up to five or six feet of snow in certain areas. The cold andsnow paralyze the city, making it impossible for people to go
to school or work. While blizzards affect Chicago, the biggest
weather problem for people in Miami is a hurricane. These
powerful storms are possible from May through November.
While hurricanes occur less frequently than blizzards, they
can cause much more damage. For instance, Hurricane
Andrew destroyed large parts of the city of Miami in 1992.
5
In the end, my cousin and I learned that each of ourclimates has its unique characteristics. Chicagoans have to livewith extreme cold and frequent blizzards that can upset their
daily routines. Conversely, Miami enjoys warm temperatures
while having to deal with the threat of hurricanes. Deciding
which city has better weather proved to be more difficult than
we anticipated. My cousin does not like hot weather, and I
cannot stand the cold. Thus, we believe that the definition of
perfect weather depends largely on each person's preference.

5 paragraphs I 34 sentences I 481 words

Post-Reading
1. What points of comparison does the writer use in this essay?

2. What method of organization does the writer use: point-by-point or block?

3. Circle the writer's hook.
4. Underline the thesis statement. Is the thesis restated in the conclusion (Paragraph S)?
_ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ If yes, underline that sentence (or sentences).
5. Underline one supporting sentence in each body paragraph (Paragraphs 2, 3, and 4).

Essay 12

Not as Different as One Would Think
I

2

3

4

5

All countries in the world are unique. Obviously, countries
are different from one another in location, size, culture, government,
climate, and lifestyle. However, many countries share some surprisingsimilarities. Some may think that these two nations have nothingin common because Brazil and the United States are in different
hemispheres. On the contrary, they share many similarities.
One important similarity is their size. Both Brazil and the UnitedStates are large countries. Brazil covers almost half of the South American
continent. Few Brazilians can say that they have traveled extensively
within the country's borders. Because Brazil covers such a large
geographic area, its weather varies greatly from one area to another. Like
Brazil, the United States takes up a significant portion of its continent(North America), so most Americans have visited only a few of the 50
states. In addition, the United States has a wide range of climates. When
the Northeast is experiencing snowstorms, cities like Miami, Florida, canhave temperatures over 85 degrees Fahrenheit.
Another similarity between Brazil and the United States is thediversity of ethnic groups. Brazil was colonized by Europeans, and its culture
has been greatly influenced by this fact. However, the identity of the Brazilian
people is not solely a product of Western civilization. Brazil is a "meltingpot" of many ethnic groups that immigrated there and mixed with theindigenous people. The United States also has a diversity of ethnic groups
representing the early colonists from northern Europe as well as groups fromAfrica, the Mediterranean, Asia, and South America. The mixture of culturesand customs has worked to form ethnically rich cultures in both countries.
Finally, individualism is an important value for both Brazilians
and Americans. Brazil works hard to defend the concept of freedom of
choice. Citizens believe that they have the right to do and be whatever they
desire as long as they do not hurt others. Individualism and freedom of
choice also exist in the United States, where freedom is perhaps the highest
value of the people. Some people may believe that the desire for individual
expression is divisive and can make a country weak. However, the abilityof people to be whatever they want makes both countries strong.
Although Brazil and the United States are unique countries, there
are remarkable similarities in their size, ethnic diversity, and personalvalues. Some people tend to believe that their culture and country arewithout equal. Nevertheless, it is important to remember that people as awhole have more in common than they generally think they do.

a hemisphere: one
half of the worldextensively: widely,over a large area

the climate: the usual
weather of a regio ndiversity: variety

solely: exclusively
indigenous: native,
originala custom: a learnedsocial or cultural
behavior
individualism:
uniqueness,
independence
a concept: an idea

remarkable: amazing,
ext raordinaryPost-Reading
1. What two subjects does the writer compare in this essay?

2. What method of organization does the writer use-point-by-point or block?

3. What is the hook for this essay? Write it here.

4. Underline the thesis statement. Is the thesis restated in the conclusion (Paragraph 5)? If yes,
underline the sentence in the conclusion that restates the thesis.

Developing Ideas for Writing
Brainstorming
You will be asked to write comparison essays in many of your classes. Often, you will be given
the two subjects to be compared, such as two poems from a literature course, two political beliefs froma political science course, or an invention and a discovery from a history or science course. When you
have to choose your own subjects for comparison, the following brainstorming tips will help you.

Make a Venn Diagram
Another way to brainstorm similarities and differences is to use a Venn diagram. A Venn
diagram is a visual representation of the similarities and differences between two concepts. Here is a
Venn diagram of the characteristics of hockey and soccer.

HOCKEY

Played on ice

6 players on a team

SOCCER
Very
popularsport

11 players on a teamCan't touch puck/ballwith hands

Uses a puck

Uses lots ofprotective pads

Played on
a grass field

Uses a soccer ball
Score = puck/ballin goalUses some
protective pads

Circle one:( )Similarities

or Differences

Planning with an Outline
I. Introduction (Paragraph 1)

B. Connecting information: - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -C. Thesis statement=------------------------------------~

I I. Body
A. Paragraph 2 (first point of comparison) topic s e n t e n c e : - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -

1.

a.
I-

b.

a::

0

a...
a...
::::>
V"l

2.

a.

b.
B. Paragraph 3 (second point of comparison) topic sentence: _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ __

1.

a.
I-

b.

a::
0

a...
a...

::::>
V"l

2.
a.

b.
C. Paragraph 4 (third point of comparison) topic sentence: _ _ __ _ _ _ _ _ _ __ _ _ _ _ _ __1.

a.
I0::::

b.

0

0....
0....

::::>
V"l

2.
a.

b.
III. Conclusion (Paragraph 5)
A. Restatedthesis=-------------------------------------~

B. Suggestion, opinion, or prediction: _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ __

Typing Guide

Comparison Essay

All Margins: 30mm
Font: Times New Roman, 12 point
Heading: Top Right. Include name, student ID number, class name/number/teacher, date
Title: Centered, Bold. Use title style capitalization.
Line Style: Essay must be DOUBLE‐SPECED (行間: 2.0). Use formatting icon, do not hit return between lines.
Indent: Use “tab” key. The first line of each paragraph must be indented.
Word Count: At the end of the paper. (400‐450 words)

Name _____________________________ Class _______________

Comparison Essay Writing
Write your Comparison Essay in the box below. Use the outline that you prepared to help you write. As you write, be sure to
use the Checklist. [Words: 400‐450 ]Title: __________________________________________________

CHECKLISTSTYLE Is there a title?
 Did you indent the first sentences of each paragraph?
 Do the sentences follow each other?
INTRODUCTION PARAGRAPH
 Is there a hook? Is it interesting?
 Is there a thesis sentence?
BODY PARAGRAPHS (How many? _______)
 Which essay style: Block or Point‐by‐point Does each paragraph have a topic sentence?
 Are there at least two supporting sentences in eachparagraph?
 Are there enough details, examples, explanations?
 Are there transition words? (first, second, next, finally,
therefore, etc.) Do they have correct punctuation?

 Is there a concluding paragraph?
 Is the thesis sentence repeated using different wording?
 Do you have a summary, an opinion, or a suggestion?
GRAMMAR/SPELLING
 Do the subjects and verbs agree?
 Are singular and plural words used correctly?
 Is the correct tense used? (past, present, future) Is the punctuation correct? (periods, commas, etc.)
 Is every word spelled correctly?
CONTENT Are the two subjects (A and B) properly compared?
 Do you show the similarities OR differences? ______________
 Are there 3 points of comparison? What are they?
1.
2.
3.

 WORD COUNT ________________
CONCLUDING PARAGRAPH

Name _____________________________ Class _______________

Comparison Essay Peer Checklist
STYLE

GRAMMAR/SPELLING Is there a title?
 Did you indent the first sentences of each paragraph?
 Do the sentences follow each other?

 Do the subjects and verbs agree?
 Are singular and plural words used correctly?
 Is the correct tense used? (past, present, future) Is the punctuation correct? (periods, commas, etc.)
 Is every word spelled correctly?

INTRODUCTION PARAGRAPH
 Is there a hook? Is it interesting?
 Is there a thesis sentence?
BODY PARAGRAPHS (How many? _______)
 Which essay style: Block or Point‐by‐point Does each paragraph have a topic sentence?
 Are there at least two supporting sentences in eachparagraph?
 Are there enough details, examples, explanations?
 Are there transition words? (first, second, next, finally,
therefore, etc.) Do they have correct punctuation?

CONTENT Are the two subjects (A and B) properly compared?
 Do you show the similarities OR differences? ______________
 Are there 3 points of comparison? What are they?
1.
2.
3.

 WORD COUNT ________________

CONCLUDING PARAGRAPH
 Is there a concluding paragraph?
 Is the thesis sentence repeated using different wording?
 Do you have a summary, an opinion, or a suggestion?

1st CHECKED by ____________
2st CHECKED by ____________Name _____________________________ Class _______________

Comparison Essay Peer Checklist
STYLE

GRAMMAR/SPELLING Is there a title?
 Did you indent the first sentences of each paragraph?
 Do the sentences follow each other?

 Do the subjects and verbs agree?
 Are singular and plural words used correctly?
 Is the correct tense used? (past, present, future) Is the punctuation correct? (periods, commas, etc.)
 Is every word spelled correctly?

INTRODUCTION PARAGRAPH
 Is there a hook? Is it interesting?
 Is there a thesis sentence?
BODY PARAGRAPHS (How many? _______)
 Which essay style: Block or Point‐by‐point Does each paragraph have a topic sentence?
 Are there at least two supporting sentences in eachparagraph?
 Are there enough details, examples, explanations?
 Are there transition words? (first, second, next, finally,
therefore, etc.) Do they have correct punctuation?

CONTENT Are the two subjects (A and B) properly compared?
 Do you show the similarities OR differences? ______________
 Are there 3 points of comparison? What are they?
1.
2.
3.

 WORD COUNT ________________

CONCLUDING PARAGRAPH
 Is there a concluding paragraph?
 Is the thesis sentence repeated using different wording?
 Do you have a summary, an opinion, or a suggestion?

1st CHECKED by ____________
2st CHECKED by __________Name _____________________________ Class _______________

Comparison Essay FINAL(400-450)

Title: __________________________________________________

Scoring Rubric
STYLE
 Is there a title?
 Did you indent the first sentences of each paragraph?
 Do the sentences follow each other?
INTRODUCTION PARAGRAPH
 Is there a hook?
 Is there a thesis sentence?
BODY PARAGRAPHS Does each paragraph have a topic sentence?
 Are there at least two supporting sentences in eachparagraph?
 Are there enough details, examples, explanations?
 Are there transition words? (first, second, next, finally,
therefore, etc.)

CONCLUDING PARAGRAPH
 Is there a concluding paragraph?
 Is the thesis sentence repeated using different wording?
 Do you have a summary, an opinion, or a suggestion?
GRAMMAR/SPELLING
 Do the subjects and verbs agree?
 Are singular and plural words used correctly?
 Is the correct tense used? (past, present, future) Is the punctuation correct? (periods, commas, etc.)
 Is every word spelled correctly?
CONTENT Are the two subjects (A and B) properly compared?
 Do you show the similarities OR differences? ______________
 Are there 3 points of comparison?

SCORE:

Comparison Essay FINAL
CONTENT: (15 points) ________


Clarity and fluency of comparison.
The main focus is on either
similarities or differences.
There are 3 points of comparison.

STYLE: (15 points) __________


There is a title.
The first sentences of eachparagraph are indented.
Sentences follow one behind
another.
Formatting (heading, font, double
space, title, word count)

Name _____________________________________ Class _______________INTRO: (10 points) __________
 There is a hook.
 There is a thesis sentence.
BODY: (20 points) __________
 Each paragraph has a topic
sentence.
 There are at least two supporting
sentences in each paragraph.
 There are enough details, examples,and explanations.
 Transition words

CONCL: (15 points) __________


There is a concluding paragraph?
The thesis sentence is repeatedusing different wording.
Conclusion ends with a summary, an
opinion, or a suggestion.

GRAMMAR/SPELL: (25 points) _____


Subjects and verbs agree, Singularand plural words used correctly,
Correct tense is used, Punctuation iscorrect, Spelling is correct.

/100

SCORE:

Comparison Essay FINAL
CONTENT: (15 points) ________


Clarity and fluency of comparison.
The main focus is on either
similarities or differences.
There are 3 points of comparison.

STYLE: (15 points) __________


There is a title.
The first sentences of eachparagraph are indented.
Sentences follow one behind
another.
Formatting (heading, font, double
space, title, word count)

Name _____________________________________ Class _______________INTRO: (10 points) __________
 There is a hook.
 There is a thesis sentence.
BODY: (20 points) __________
 Each paragraph has a topic
sentence.
 There are at least two supporting
sentences in each paragraph.
 There are enough details, examples,and explanations.
 Transition words

CONCL: (15 points) __________


There is a concluding paragraph?
The thesis sentence is repeatedusing different wording.
Conclusion ends with a summary, an
opinion, or a suggestion.

GRAMMAR/SPELL: (25 points) _____


Subjects and verbs agree, Singularand plural words used correctly,
Correct tense is used, Punctuation iscorrect, Spelling is correct.

/100

SCORE:

Comparison Essay FINAL
CONTENT: (15 points) ________


Clarity and fluency of comparison.
The main focus is on either
similarities or differences.
There are 3 points of comparison.

STYLE: (15 points) __________


There is a title.
The first sentences of eachparagraph are indented.
Sentences follow one behind
another.
Formatting (heading, font, double
space, title, word count)

Name _____________________________________ Class _______________INTRO: (10 points) __________
 There is a hook.
 There is a thesis sentence.
BODY: (20 points) __________
 Each paragraph has a topic
sentence.
 There are at least two supporting
sentences in each paragraph.
 There are enough details, examples,and explanations.
 Transition words

CONCL: (15 points) __________


There is a concluding paragraph?
The thesis sentence is repeatedusing different wording.
Conclusion ends with a summary, an
opinion, or a suggestion.

GRAMMAR/SPELL: (25 points) _____
SCORE:

Subjects and verbs agree, Singularand plural words used correctly,
Correct tense is used, Punctuation iscorrect, Spelling is correct.

/100

Name ____________________________________ Class _______________

Comparison Essay TEST PREP
Use three pairs of the following subjects and compare them. A. Choose two subjects and compare them using a Venn diagram.
B. Decide if you want to focus on their similarities or differences. C. What are your three points of comparison? Finally, D.
Choose one of the three pairs that you compared and write an outline for a comparison essay on the back of this paper.
Subjects:
 Heisei Period Elephants
 Western Food Police Officers
 Sanda Obon








 Cats Oshogatsu
 Ferry travel Tokyo Doctors
 Train travel

K Pop
Farmers
Ramen
Pasta
Edo Period
Kyoto








Yakisoba
J Pop
WhalesEnka
WinterBus Travel








Japanese Food
Halloween
SpringOffice Worker
SummerShowa Period

A. Create a Venn diagram using two subjects from above:

1. _________________

2. _________________

B. Will you focus on the subjects’ DIFFERENCES or SIMILARITIES or BOTH? _______________________________
C. What are your three Points of Comparison?
A. _________________________________

B. _________________________________

C. _________________________________

A. Create a Venn diagram using two subjects from above:

1. _________________

2. _________________

B. Will you focus on the subjects’ DIFFERENCES or SIMILARITIES or BOTH? _______________________________
C. What are your three Points of Comparison?
A. _________________________________

B. _________________________________

C. _________________________________

A. Create a Venn diagram using two ORIGINAL subjects:

1. _________________

2. _________________

B. Will you focus on the subjects’ DIFFERENCES or SIMILARITIES or BOTH? _______________________________
C. What are your three Points of Comparison?
A. _________________________________

B. _________________________________TOPIC: _________________________________________________________________
I. Introduction (Paragraph 1)

C. _________________________________OUTLINE

A. Hook: ___________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________
B. Thesis Statement: ________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________
II. Body
A. First Point of Comparison, Topic Sentence (Paragraph 2): _________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________
1. _________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________
a. _______________________________________________________________________________________________________________________
b. _______________________________________________________________________________________________________________________
2. _________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________
a. _______________________________________________________________________________________________________________________
b. _______________________________________________________________________________________________________________________
B. Second Point of Comparison, Topic Sentence (Paragraph 3): _______________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________
1. _________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________
a. _______________________________________________________________________________________________________________________
b. _______________________________________________________________________________________________________________________
2. _________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________
a. _______________________________________________________________________________________________________________________
b. _______________________________________________________________________________________________________________________
C. Third Point of Comparison, Topic Sentence (Paragraph 4): ________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________
1. _________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________
a. _______________________________________________________________________________________________________________________
b. _______________________________________________________________________________________________________________________
2. _________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________
a. _______________________________________________________________________________________________________________________
b. _______________________________________________________________________________________________________________________
III. Conclusion (Paragraph 5)
A. Restated Thesis: __________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________
B. Suggestion, Opinion, or Prediction: __________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________Name ____________________________________ Class _______________

Comparison Essay TEST
Choose two of following subjects and compare their similarities or differences in an essay below. Your essay should use Point‐by‐
Point organization and have five paragraphs. Word count should be between 150‐300 words. Be sure to use proper paragraphstyle, transition words, and many details (examples or explanations).

A. Subjects (Choose two):






DoctorGame Center
Pizza
Whale
BalletNet Cafe
Okinawa
Oshogatsu
Ferry
K Pop







Tokyo
Elephant
Obon
Nurse
Okonomiyaki







TeacherBasketball
Horse
Bus
Halloween







Police Officer
Train
J Pop
Enka
KaraokeB. Will you focus on the subjects’ DIFFERENCES or SIMILARITIES? _______________________________
C. What are your three Points of Comparison?
1. _______________________________ 2. _______________________________ 3. _______________________________

Title: __________________________________________________

Scoring Rubric
CONTENT: (15 points) __________
 Clarity and fluency of comparison.
 The main focus is on either similarities
or differences.
 There are 3 points of comparison.
STYLE: (15 points) __________
 There is a title.
 The first sentences of each paragraphare indented.
 Sentences follow one behind another.

INTRODUCTION: (10 points) __________

CONCLUDING: (15 points) __________

 There is a hook.
 There is a thesis sentence.

 There is a concluding paragraph?
 The thesis sentence is repeated using
different wording.
 Conclusion ends with a summary, an
opinion, or a suggestion.

BODY: (20 points) __________
 Each paragraph has a topic sentence.
 There are at least two supporting
sentences in each paragraph.
 There are enough details, examples,and explanations.
 Transition words are used correctly.

SCORE:GRAMMAR/SPELLING: (25 points) ______
 Subjects and verbs agree, Singular andplural words used correctly, Correcttense is used, Punctuation is correct,
Spelling is correct.

Name ___________________________________________________ Number _______________________Class _______________________________

Comparison Essay TESTSCORE: __________/100

Choose any two topics and compare their similarities or differences in an essay below. Word count should be between 280‐350 words. Be sure to use properparagraph style, transition words, and many details (examples or explanations).

A. What TWO topics will you compare? _________________________________ & _________________________________
B. Will you focus on the topics’ DIFFERENCES, SIMILARITIEs, or BOTH? _____________________________________________
C. Points of Comparison?
1. _____________________________ 2. _____________________________ 3. _______________________________
D. WORD COUNT: _______________________ (280‐350)

CONTENT: (15 points) ________


Clarity and fluency of comparison.
The main focus is on either similarities ordifferences or both.
There are 3 points of comparison.

STYLE: (15 points) __________


There is a title.
The first sentences of each paragraph areindented.
Sentences follow one behind another.
Formatting (heading, font, double space,title, word count)

INTRO: (10 points) __________


There is a hook.
Intro gives some background info.
There is a thesis sentence.

CONCL: (15 points) __________


BODY: (20 points) __________


Each paragraph has a topic sentence.
There are at least two supporting
sentences in each paragraph.
There are enough details, examples, andexplanations.
Transition words

There is a concluding paragraph?
The thesis sentence is repeated using
different wording.
Conclusion ends with a summary, an
opinion, or a suggestion.

GRAMMAR/SPELL: (25 points) _____


Subjects and verbs agree, singular andplural words used correctly, correcttense is used, punctuation is correct,
spelling is correct.
Overall fluency

Name ___________________________________________________ Number _______________________Class _______________________________

Comparison Essay TESTSCORE: __________/100

Choose any two topics and compare their similarities or differences in an essay below. Word count should be between 280‐350 words. Be sure to use properparagraph style, transition words, and many details (examples or explanations).

A. What TWO topics will you compare? _________________________________ & _________________________________
B. Will you focus on the topics’ DIFFERENCES, SIMILARITIEs, or BOTH? _____________________________________________
C. Points of Comparison?
1. _____________________________ 2. _____________________________ 3. _______________________________
D. WORD COUNT: _______________________ (280‐350)

CONTENT: (15 points) ________


Clarity and fluency of comparison.
The main focus is on either similarities ordifferences or both.
There are 3 points of comparison.

INTRO: (10 points) __________


There is a hook.
Intro gives some background info.
There is a thesis sentence.

CONCL: (15 points) __________


BODY: (20 points) __________STYLE: (15 points) __________


There is a title.
The first sentences of each paragraph areindented.
Sentences follow one behind another.
Formatting (heading, font, double space,title, word count)






Each paragraph has a topic sentence.
There are at least two supporting
sentences in each paragraph.
There are enough details, examples, andexplanations.
Transition words

There is a concluding paragraph?
The thesis sentence is repeated using
different wording.
Conclusion ends with a summary, an
opinion, or a suggestion.

GRAMMAR/SPELL: (25 points) _____


Subjects and verbs agree, singular andplural words used correctly, correcttense is used, punctuation is correct,
spelling is correct.
Overall fluency

Name_______________________________________________Class____________

Argumentative Essay Writing
In an argumentative essay, your job is make the reader agree with your opinion about a controversial topic.
You have to (1) state your opinion, (2) give reasons to support your opinion, and (3) argue against the opposite
opinion. Overall, you must convince the audience that your side of theargument is correct. To convince the audience, your essay must bebalanced—it must include your viewpoint and the opposing viewpoint,
or counterargument.
Even though you are arguing only one side of an issue, you must
think about what the other side would say about your opinion. Afteryou give the counterargument, you must refute it by showing that it iswrong. If your essay is balanced, a reader is more likely to agree withyou.

ORGANIZATION
The most common type of argumentative essay has six paragraphs. Like all essays, it begins with an
introduction and ends with a conclusion. In between are the body paragraphs where you must do three
things: support your opinion, present the opposing point of view, and tell why that viewpoint is wrong.

INTRODUCTIONBODY

CONCLUSION

Paragraph 1

Hook
Connecting/Background Information
Main idea Statement/Thesis Statement

Paragraph 2

Support 1 (first reason)
 Explanation, detail, example
 Explanation, detail, example

Paragraph 3

Support 2 (second reason)
 Explanation, detail, example
 Explanation, detail, example

Paragraph 4

Support 3 (third reason)
 Explanation, detail, example
 Explanation, detail, example

Paragraph5

Opposite Side
 Counterargument 1
 Refutation (ATTACK) Counterargument 2
 Refutation (ATTACK)Paragraph 6

Repeat your thesis statement in different words
Suggestion/Opinion/Prediction for the future

Studying an Argumentative Essay
The following essay argues for the use of school uniforms. Discuss the Preview Questions with the class. Then
read the example essay and answer the questions that follow.
Preview Questions
1. Did you wear a uniform when you went to school?
2. Some people believe that children are too materialistic these days. For example, they may be toointerested in wearing expensive brand name clothes. What is your opinion?

TOPICS FOR ARGUMENTATIVE ESSAYS
What is a great topic for an argumentative essay? Obviously, it should be an issue that you feel strongly
about, know something about, and would like to share your opinion about. What is your opinion, why do you
feel this way? Can you think of some reasons why people might disagree with you?
When you choose a topic, consider these two questions: Does the topic have two sides?
 How much do you know about the topic?
Look at the list of argumentative topics below. What is your opinion about each topic? Are they two sides ofeach topic?

Topics for Argument
Banning cigarettes
Requiring school uniforms
Mandating military service
Lowering the drinking age to 18
Getting rid of zoos

ACTIVITY

Banning violent video games
Using animals for medical research
Requiring a test for people who want children
Banning cell phones in schools
Requiring a year of study abroad

Identifying Topics for Argumentative Essays

Read these eight topics. Put a check mark () next to the ones that could be good topics for argument essays.
_________1. The first time I flew in a plane.
_________2. University education should be free.
_________3. How and why birds fly south for the winter.
_________4. High school teachers need a higher salary.
_________5. Steps needed to get a driver’s license.
_________6. Legalizing gay marriage.
_________7. Increasing tax on imported food.
_________8. How to become a karate master.
Can you think of three additional topics that would be excellent for an argumentative essay?
1. __________________________________________________________________________________
2. __________________________________________________________________________________
3. __________________________________________________________________________________TOPICS FOR ARGUMENTATIVE ESSAYS
After you choose a topic, think about what you know about it. What do you know about your side of theargument and what do you know about the opposite side of the argument? A good way to organize yourideas is to use a Pro & Con T-chart. [Pro = in favor of thesis statement, Con = against thesis statement]
If you cannot think of several ideas for one or both sides, you should do more research about that topic
or choose a different topic.

Here is a Pro & Con T-Chart for an essay about cell-phones being allowed in classrooms.

Thesis statement: Cell phones should not be allowed in university classrooms.

PRO
1. Cell phones distract students fromlearning if they send messages or playgames in class.
2. Cell phones might ring in class anddisturb the teacher.
3. Students could use cell phones to cheaton tests.

ACTIVITYCON
1. Cell phones can easily be turned off
and kept out of sight.
2. University students are not children andcellphones are important in an emergency.
3. Cell phones can be useful tools for educationsuch a being used as a dictionary or to makememos.

Brainstorming Supporting Ideas

Read the thesis statements and complete the Pro & Con T-charts. Write three ideas to support eachstatement. Then write three ideas against each statement. Finally, choose an original topic and write a thesis
statement of your own. Then fill in the pros and cons for your new topic.
1. Thesis statement: Adults should be required to pass a test before they can become parents.
PRO

CON

1.

1.

2.

2.

3.

3.

2. Thesis statement: The drinking age in Japan should be lowered to 18 years old.
PRO

CON

1.

1.

2.

2.

3.

3.

3. ORIGINAL Thesis statement: _____________________________________________________________
PRO

CON

1.

1.

2.

2.

3.

3.

Name_______________________________________________Class____________

Original Student Writing: Argument Essay
Brainstorming will help you get started with your argumentative essay. In this section, you will choose a topic foryour essay, write your thesis statement, think about several supporting ideas for your opinion, and think about thecounterargument.
ACTIVITY

Planning your Essay

Follow the steps below to develop ideas for an argument essay.
1. First, choose any other topic and thesis statement that you want to write about. Remember that the topic
must have more than one point of view to qualify as an argument.
Essay topic: _____________________________________________________________________________
Thesis statement: _______________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________
2. Now brainstorm ideas about your topic. Fill out the Pro & Con T-Chart with as many ideas as you can.
PRO

CON

1.

1.

2.

2.

3.

3.

4.

4.

5.

5.

3. Look at your Pro & Con T-chart again. Choose three reasons from your PRO list that support your thesis
most effectively and circle them. You now know what your major supporting information will be.
4. Now give attention to opposing points of view. In the box below, choose two counterarguments from yourCON list and write a refutation for each.
Counterargument (from CON list)
1.

2.

Refutation (ATTACK - Why is it wrong?)ACTIVITY

Planning with an Outline

Try to complete the following outline before you begin writing your essay. You may use more support
sentences if you need. And try to use complete sentences when it is possible.
1. Introduction (Paragraph 1)
A. Hook: _____________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________
B. Connecting Information:_______________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________
C. Thesis Statement: ___________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________
2. Body
A. First Reason (Paragraph 2) topic sentence: _______________________________________________

Support_________________________________________________________________________________
1. _____________________________________________________________________________
2. _____________________________________________________________________________
3. _____________________________________________________________________________

B. Second Reason (Paragraph 3) topic sentence: ____________________________________________

Support_________________________________________________________________________________
1. _____________________________________________________________________________
2. _____________________________________________________________________________
3. _____________________________________________________________________________

C. Third Reason (Paragraph 4) topic sentence: ______________________________________________

Support_________________________________________________________________________________
1. _____________________________________________________________________________
2. _____________________________________________________________________________
3. _____________________________________________________________________________

D. Counterargument (Paragraph 5)
1. Counterargument #1: ________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________
Refutation (attack): __________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________
2. Counterargument #2: ________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________
Refutation (attack): __________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________
3. Conclusion (Paragraph 6)
A. Restated Thesis: _____________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________
B. Opinion/Suggestion/Prediction: ________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________

Argumentative Essay: PEER Checklist
Name ________________________________________ Class _______________

This essay was CHECKED by(If this essay is not checked correctly,
the student who checked it may lose
points on their essay.)

STYLE What is the title of the essay? (Do you think it could be a better title?)_________________________________________________________________________________________________
 Each paragraph is indented?
 Did the writer follow the typing guide (heading, title, tab=indent, spacing, etc.)?
 WORD COUNT (380-450) ________________INTRODUCTION PARAGRAPH
 Is there a hook? Is it relevant to many people?
 Is there background information about the topic?
 Is there a THESIS STATEMENT (main opinion or main idea)? What is the thesis statement of the essay?
__________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________

BODY PARAGRAPHS Do paragraphs 2, 3, and 4 give THREE REASONS to support the main opinion? What are the reasons?
Paragraph 2: ______________________________________________________________________________________
Paragraph 3: ______________________________________________________________________________________
Paragraph 4: ______________________________________________________________________________________


Does each paragraph have a topic sentence?
Are there at least two supporting sentences in each paragraph?
Are there enough details, examples, explanations?
Are there transition words? (first, second, next, finally, however, therefore, etc.) Do they have correct punctuation?

 Does Paragraph 5 give a COUNTERARGUMENT (opposite opinion)? What are the counterarguments?
1. _______________________________________________________________________________________________
2. _______________________________________________________________________________________________
 Does the writer REFUTE (attack) the counterarguments? How does the writer attack the counterarguments?
__________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________

CONCLUDING PARAGRAPH
 Is there a concluding paragraph?
 Is the thesis sentence repeated using different wording?
 Does the writer MAKE A SUGGESTION or GIVE AN OPINION or MAKE A PREDICTION about the future?
What do they say? ___________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________GRAMMAR/SPELLING (Read the essay again and add editing symbols, comments, and/questions.)







If you don't understand something, please put a question mark (?).
Feel free to write comments or questions in English or Japanese.
Do subjects and verbs agree?
Are singular and plural words used correctly?
Is the correct tense used? (past, present, future)
Is the punctuation correct? (periods, commas, question mark, etc.)
Is the spelling correct?

Argumentative Essay FINALSTYLE (10 points)

Title and title style
Paragraphs are indented
Format (heading, title, indent=tab, spacing 2.0)
Word Count (450-500)

INTRODUCTION (20 points)
 Hook: has an interesting hook Background/connecting information
 Thesis statement clearly expresses main opinion

SUPPORTING PARAGRAPHS (20 points)







Paragraphs 2, 3, & 4 give three reasons to support main opinion
Each paragraph has a topic sentence
Each paragraph has at least two supporting sentences
There are enough details, examples, and explanations
Transition words are used correctly
There is at least one outside source

Argumentative Essay FINALSTYLE (10 points)

Title and title style
Paragraphs are indented
Format (heading, title, indent=tab, spacing 2.0)
Word Count (450-500)

INTRODUCTION (20 points)
 Hook: has an interesting hook Background/connecting information
 Thesis statement clearly expresses main opinion

SUPPORTING PARAGRAPHS (20 points)







Paragraphs 2, 3, & 4 give three reasons to support main opinion
Each paragraph has a topic sentence
Each paragraph has at least two supporting sentences
There are enough details, examples, and explanations
Transition words are used correctly
There is at least one outside source

Argumentative Essay FINALSTYLE (10 points)

Title and title style
Paragraphs are indented
Format (heading, title, indent=tab, spacing 2.0)
Word Count (450-500)

INTRODUCTION (20 points)
 Hook: has an interesting hook Background/connecting information
 Thesis statement clearly expresses main opinion

SUPPORTING PARAGRAPHS (20 points)







Paragraphs 2, 3, & 4 give three reasons to support main opinion
Each paragraph has a topic sentence
Each paragraph has at least two supporting sentences
There are enough details, examples, and explanations
Transition words are used correctly
There is at least one outside source

Name___________________________________ Class _________________

COUNTERARGUMENTS (20 points)
 Two counter-arguments are given against the main opinion
 The counter-arguments are properly refuted
 The counterarguments and refutations are logical

CONCLUSION (10 points)
 The thesis statement is repeated and rephrased
 There is an opinion, suggestion, or prediction about the future

OVERALL FLUENCY (20 points)
 Spelling and word choice Overall grammar and punctuation
 Overall, the writing is clear and easy to understand
SCORE:_____________________ /100

Name___________________________________ Class _________________

COUNTERARGUMENTS (20 points)
 Two counter-arguments are given against the main opinion
 The counter-arguments are properly refuted
 The counterarguments and refutations are logical

CONCLUSION (10 points)
 The thesis statement is repeated and rephrased
 There is an opinion, suggestion, or prediction about the future

OVERALL FLUENCY (20 points)
 Spelling and word choice Overall grammar and punctuation
 Overall, the writing is clear and easy to understand
SCORE:_____________________ /100

Name___________________________________ Class _________________

COUNTERARGUMENTS (20 points)
 Two counter-arguments are given against the main opinion
 The counter-arguments are properly refuted
 The counterarguments and refutations are logical

CONCLUSION (10 points)
 The thesis statement is repeated and rephrased
 There is an opinion, suggestion, or prediction about the future

OVERALL FLUENCY (20 points)
 Spelling and word choice Overall grammar and punctuation
 Overall, the writing is clear and easy to understand
SCORE:_____________________ /10

(C)

(A)
SymbolMeaning

Example of errorΛ

1. missing word

He reading a book now.

cap

2. capitalizationvt

3. verb tenses/v

4. subject-verb

a. She like him.

agreementb. There are some milk.

Corrected sentence( )Meaning

Example of error

wf

1. wrong form

The Olympics is on soon,ww

2. wrong wordwo

3. wrong word

I went at the beachorderswimming.

prep

4. preposition

The game starts 9:30.

SymbolMeaning

Example of errorart

1. article

You should bring bookpron

2. pronoun

My brother bought her

agreement

own car.

con

3. connection

I like red wine. I don’t

rep

4. repetition

I went to His house on
Saturday.

I go to Kyoto last month.

(B)
SymbolSymbolCorrected sentence

so I am exciting.

I fun golf. Other sport I
like is tennis.

(D)
Meaning

Example of error

1. make one

a. Yes, some times I do.

word or sentenceb. He stayed up late. So he

Corrected sentence

and pen to every class.

is tired today.

sp

2. spellings/pl

3. singular orX

4. unnecessary

The bullet train it is very

word

fast.

London is the kapital cityof England.

She has five pet cat.

plurallike white.

Junko is friendly andeveryone likes Junko.

Corrected sentenceCorrection Symbols
1.

Im happy youre herep

I’m happy you’re here.

2.

i love english.

cap

I love English.

3.

When did you up this morning?

When did you get up this morning?

4.

I rike cats.

sp

I like cats.

5.

My birthday is on June.

prep

My birthday is in June.

6.

He likes play tennis.

wf

He likes playing tennis.

7.

I love chocolate. I don’t like white chocolate.

con

I love chocolate, but I don’t like...

8.

Shibuya is fun and I often go to Shibuya.

rep

Shibuya is fun and I often go there.

9.

I buy a new shirt yesterday.

vt

I bought a new shirt yesterday.

10.

He go to university on Saturday.

s/v

He goes to university on Saturday.

11.

I went to Disneyland with all my friend.

pl

I went to Disneyland with all my friends.

12.

I visited to my grandparents.

X

I visited my grandparents.

13.

She name is Michelle.

pron

Her name is Michelle.

14.

I live in theTokyo.

art.

I live in Tokyo.

15.

My father every day beer drinks.

wo

My father drinks beer every day.

16.

I work on Sun day.

( )I work on Sunday.

17.

My favourite dish is watermelon.

ww

My favourite food is watermelon.

EXAMPLE PARAGRAPH: 14 errors
Scotland is country in europe. its famus for whiskey and and Nessie. If you go to Scotland, you shuold visit
Edinburgh. The best way to get Scotland is to flew to london, then tak the Train. Go you should in summer,
because it is warmmer.

Scotland is a country in Europe. It’s famous for whiskey and and Nessie. If you go to Scotland, you should
visit Edinburgh. The best way to get to Scotland is to flew to London, then take the Train. You should go insummer, because it is warmer.

1. Im happy youre here
2. i love english.
3. When did you up this morning?
4. I rike cats.

5.My birthday is on June.
6. He likes play tennis.
7. I love chocolate. I don’t like white
chocolate.
8. Shibuya is fun and I often go to Shibuya.
9. I buy a new shirt yesterday.
10. He go to university on Saturday.
11. I went to Disneyland with all my friend.
12. I visited to my grandparents.
13. She name is Michelle.
14. I live in the Tokyo.
15. My father every day beer drinks.
16. I work on Sun day.
17. My favourite dish is watermelon.

Group Members:Sentence Editing Game

9.

1.

10.

2.

11.

3.

12.

4.

13.

5.

14.

6.

15.

7.

16.

8.

17.

Editing Symbols Review
SYMBOLSYMBOLMEANINGppunctuation

wf

wrong formΛ

missing word

wwwrong wordcap

capitalizationwo

wrong word ordervt

verb tense

prep

preposition

s/v

subject-verb agreementart

article

( )
1.
2.
3.
4.
5.
6.
7.
8.
9.
10.
11.
12.
13.
14.
15.
16.
17.

MEANING

Name ______________________________________________

combinepron

pronoun agreementspspelling

conconnectors/plsingular or pluralreprepetitionX

unnecessary word?

I don’t understand!

Im happy youre here
i love english.
When did you up this morning?
I rike cats.
My birthday is on June.
He likes play tennis.
I love chocolate. I don’t like white chocolate.
Shibuya is fun and I often go to Shibuya.
I buy a new shirt yesterday.
He go to university on Saturday.
I went to Disneyland with all my friend.
I visited to my grandparents.
She name is Michelle.
I live in theTokyo.
My father every day beer drinks.
I work on Sun day.
My favourite dish is watermelon.

Correct the Paragraph:
Scotland is country in europe. Its famus for whiskey and and Nessie. If you
go to Scotland, you shuold visit Edinburgh. The best way to get on Scot land is toflew to london, then take the Train. Go you should in summer because it iswarmmer.

Editing Symbols Review (Answer Key)

Correct the Paragraph: (12 Mistakes)
Scotland is a country in europe. Its famus for whiskey and andNessie. If you go to Scotland, you shuold visit Edinburgh. The best way
to get on Scot land is to flew to london, then take the Train. Go you
should in summer because it is warmmer.

GRAMMAR WORDS(1) Use the words on the board to complete the examples in the chart below:

GRAMMAR WORD

EXAMPLESDESCRIPTION

slow, red, ...

Adjective

describes a noun

Adverbtells how, where, or when

Articlemakes a noun specific or general(only 3 in English!)Connector

words to join ideas

Nounnames a person, place or thing

Prepositionshows direction, place, or time

Punctuation

a symbol used to divide the parts ofthe sentence

Pronounreplaces a nounVerbtells action, feeling or condition(2) Put the following words or phrases in the example column above:
green

aroundmagazineshe

howeveryours

next toeducation

easilyof

couldpeoplewrote

AmericanElizabeth

often

later

those

“”

will wantnoisilyoldangrilythem(3) Add some more examples yourself!
(4) Which parts are missing from these sentences?
a) I _____________ penguins.

 verbb) ________ don’t play tennis.

c) Yokohama is a _________ city.

d) I have lunch ______ the classroom.

e) _____ sister’s name is Elizabeth.

f) I _____ a dog at Shibuya yesterday.

(5) Now write your idea for the missing word in the space.

ANSWER KEY

GRAMMAR WORD

EXAMPLESDESCRIPTION
describes a noun

Adjective

boring, slow, red, excitedgreen, American, oldAdverbhappily, slowly, loudly, tells how, where, or whenquickly, easily, often, later,
noisily, angrily

Articlea, an, themakes a noun specific or general(only 3 in English!)Connector

because, and, so, but, words to join ideas
howeverNoun

New York, teacher,
pumpkins, peace,magazine, education,
people, Elizabeth,

names a person, place or thing

Prepositionin, by, at, on, around,next to, ofshows direction, place, or time

Punctuation.,?!“”

a symbol used to divide the parts ofthe sentence

Pronounhe, I, you, this, she, yours, replaces a noun
those, themVerbwant, think, dance, play,
could, wrote, will want,tells action, feeling or condition

A
A POSTCARD FROM ___________________(noun – a place)

Dear _____________,(your partner’s name)Hi! How are you? I’m having a ___________ time on vacation. I’m here with my( adjective)__________ and my _________. Every day we go _________ the __________ and( noun)( noun)(preposition)( noun)___________. For lunch we go to a local ___________ and eat delicious _________.
( verb)( noun)( noun – plural)

Last night, we went to a/an ___________ dance show. The dancers were all( noun)___________ and they danced ___________.
( adjective)( adverb)

See you soon!
Your friend,____________________( your teacher’s name)B

MY FAVORITE SPORT

I’m learning a new sport. It’s called __________. It’s a / an __________ sport to learn, and( noun)( adjective)

it’s ___________, too. I love it! You ___________ this sport with a big ___________ . You( adjective)(verb)( noun)also have to wear ___________ shoes. You have to run ___________ and kick ___________( adjective)( adverb)( adverb)

to be a good player. I was a very ___________ player at first, but now I’m ___________.
( adjective)( adjective)

Someday I hope to play as ___________ as ___________. On weekends we play together( adverb)___________ the ___________.
( preposition)( noun)( noun)Name ________________________________________ Date: __________________

Comma Practice Worksheet
Rule: Commas are used with coordinating conjunctions (FANBOYS) to combine two
Independent Clauses together: IC, and IC.
DIRECTIONS:• Add commas where necessary in the following sentences based on the rule above.
• If the sentence is correct, circle the number.
• Highlight both Independent Clauses for each compound sentence.

Example: I like coffee ,and Robert likes iced tea.

1. I am a wife and I am a mother.
2. I am fervently against discrimination of any kind to any group but I believe we’regoing just a bit overboard when the Bible is called sexist and rewritten.
3. All major religions have as their Almighty a paternal figure and I suggest that thisstate of affairs in no way diminishes the status of women.
4. The test doesn’t seem too difficult but it may get harder.
5. I want a wife who will have arranged that the children are fed and ready for bed
before my guests arrive so that the children do not bother us.
6. Glen refused to visit his sister because she was rude to him.
7. Teens watch movies at the theater or they rent movies and watch them at home.
8. We now have Tropical Storm Tommy and Hurricane Hilda and meteorologists can nolonger be accused of casting aspersions on the feminine temperament.
9. I would like to go back to school so that I can become economically independent
support myself and support those dependent upon me.
10. It may mean a cut in my wife’s income from time to time but I guess I can toleratethat.

Rule: Commas are used between items in a series, including between the next-to-lastitem and the last item: . . . item 1, item 2, and item 3 . . .
DIRECTIONS:• Add commas where necessary in the following sentences based on the rule above.
• If the sentence is correct, circle the number

Example: I like hot chocolate, hot coffee, or hot tea on winter evenings.
Item 1item 2
item 3

1. Death itself must be embellished or satirized or deep-frozen in order to catch the
public’s attention.
2. Jerry loves apple pie french fries and cherries but will not buy them.
3. Teens watch movies at the theater or rent them and watch them at home.
4. I’m all for the women’s movement and its primary goals of equality of opportunity inthe work place shared responsibilities in the home political power financial
independence and so forth.
5. I want a wife who will keep my clothes clean ironed mended and replaced whenneeded.

Rule: Commas are used to separate an introductory element from the Independent
Clause that follows it.
DIRECTIONS:• Add commas where necessary in the following sentences based on the rule above.
• If the sentence is correct, circle the number.
• Highlight each Independent Clause.

Example: Since we left the house, I keep wondering if I turned off the oven.

1. When someone dies in the convalescent home where my grandmother lives thenurses rush to close all the patient’s doors.
2. Having lost everything in the war my grandmother can offer me only her distantmemories.
3. If agony and pain are part of Vietnamese culture pleasure is at the center ofAmerica’s culture.
4. Even though I wanted to tell her that I wanted to die anywhere but in a convalescenthome the soft moaning of a patient next door and the smell of alcohol wafting fromthe sterile corridor brought be back to reality.
5. After Heather sorted the laundry she realized that she needed detergent.
6. His fears creeping up on him Jordan looked nervous.
7. Studying for the comma quiz helped Jasmine improve her class grade.
8. When the sun sets people like to walk along the bike path.
9. Ann refused to visit her brother because he was rude to her.
10. Because of the traffic delays we may be late to dinner.

Rule: Commas are used to surround non-restrictive elements (interrupters) that land in
the middle of an Independent Clause.
DIRECTIONS:• Add commas where necessary in the following sentences based on the rule
above.
• If the sentence is correct, circle the number.
• Highlight the Independent Clause of each item (not the interrupter).

Example: I saw Mrs. Boyles, my English teacher, working in her office.

1. She talks now mainly of her hometown Bac-Lieu with its river and green rice fields.
2. That single stroke which paralyzed her forced my grandmother into a convalescenthome.
3. That America relies upon the pleasure principal and happy endings in its
entertainment does not however assist us when we face the reality of theconvalescent home.
4. People who invest their money wisely can retire without much fear.
5. Fish as far as we know breathe only underwater.
6. Calcium of course is very important in a woman’s diet.
7. Dave Frickle who coaches track and field at BC is also the cross country coach.
8. Wasco a small town off of the 99 highway is Pedro’s place of birth.
9. The possibility that physical or psychological differences of any sort exist strikes theparticular fear that this will be equated with superiority or inferiority of certain
groups.
10. You can buy tickets for the Cirque du Soleil a dramatic mix of circus arts and street
entertainment at any Las Vegas ticket master.

Rule: Commas are used between coordinate adjectives
DIRECTIONS:• Add commas where necessary in the following sentences based on the rule
above.
• If the sentence is correct, circle the number.

Example: The dirty, stinky socks need to be washed.
adj adj noun

1. That man’s old golden retriever may not live through the winter.
2. The once gentle connected world of the past is now just the language of dreams.
3. Those mindless bedridden bodies of the convalescent home are kept alive through aseries of tubes and pulsating machines.
4. The five American teenagers wanted to go to Mexico for spring break.
5. The mother fed and then put to bed the tired cranky child.

Round Robin
Suspense
Writing Activity
Students will work in cooperative writing groups todevelop a variety of possible stories around a single prompt.

What You Need
Suspense Writing Prompts (next page)
Timing device

What to Do
•

•

•

•

Divide the class into writing groups of about 5 students. Allow each group to select one
prompt from the Suspense Writing Prompts list. Tell them that they will be writing 5
different stories using the prompt. At the end of the timed writing, they will select theversion they like best to share with the class.
Instruct the students to begin by writing the prompt as an opening. Then give them exactly
2 minutes to write. At the end of the 2 minutes, they must stop, even if they are in a
middle of a sentence.
They pass their papers to the right. This time you give them 3 minutes. During that time,they must read what the previous author has written and continue that story. At the endof the 3 minute segment, they again stop and pass their papers. The third writer has 4
minutes to write, the fourth writer has 5 minutes, and the fifth writer has 6 minutes. The
final writing session should return the paper to its original owner for 7 minutes, where thestory is ended.
The stories are then shared within the small groups. After they read them, each group may
select one version to share with the class.

Teaching Options••

Each group may collaborate to combine, revise, and edit a final version of the story using
the best plot, images, and details from all their stories. Remind students to review theelements of suspense stories, and to incorporate this framework into their finished piece.
Have students illustrate their stories and post them on a bulletin board for all to share andenjoy.

Suspense Writing Prompts
1. It was a dark and stormy night . . .
2. I knew there was something funny about that house when I entered. . .
3. She seemed like such a sweet old lady. Who would ever believe that she
was really . . .
4. It was odd. One day our teacher just . . . disappeared!
5. It looked like a plain old milkshake to me . . .
6. It was the road to nowhere . . .
7. If they weren't in such a hurry, they wouldn't have taken that short cut
through the cemetery . . .
8. No one was ever really sure what was going on down in the new kid's
basement . . .
9. It was the strangest thing I ever heard. And it was the last thing my uncle
said before he died . . .

10. I thought it was just a glitch in my computer. But that was yesterday,
before I discovered that . . .

Sentence
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Typing Guide
All Margins: 30mm
Font: Times New Roman, 12 point
Heading: Top Right. Include name, student ID number, class name/number/teacher, date
Title: Centered, Bold. Use title style capitalization.
Line Style: Essay must be DOUBLE-SPECED (行間: 2.0). Use formatting icon, do not hit return between lines.
Indent: Use “tab” key. The first line of each paragraph must be indented.
Word Count: At the end of the paper.

	
  
	
  
	
  
	
  

Kwansei Gakuin University
Department of Science and Technology
Instructor: Matthew Barbee

	
  

	
  
	
  
	
  
	
  
	
  
	
  

1A	
  

	
  
	
  
	
  
	
  
	
  
	
  
	
  
	
  
	
  
	
  
	
  

Name:

Class:

Correction Symbols

Incorrect Sentence

Correct Sentence

	
  
	
  
	
  
Name:	
  ______________________________________________	  	
  Class:__________________	
  

	
  	
  

Table	  of	
  Contents	
  Peer-­‐	  edited	  by:	
  Title	
  Rewrite	  Check	  Word	
  Count	
  

1.	
  
2.	
  
3.	
  
4.	
  
5.	
  

	
  
	
  
	
  
	
  
	
  

	
  
	
  
	
  
	
  
	
  

	
  
	
  
	
  
	
  
	
  

	
  

	
  

	
  

	
  

Teacher	  Comments:	  Score:	
  

	
  	
  

印 	
  
○

	
  	
  
Peer-­‐	  edited	  by:	
  Title	
  Rewrite	  Check	  Word	
  Count	
  

6.	
  
7.	
  
8.	
  
9.	
  
10.	
  

	
  
	
  
	
  
	
  
	
  

	
  
	
  
	
  
	
  
	
  

	
  
	
  
	
  
	
  
	
  

	
  

	
  

	
  

	
  

Teacher	  Comments:	  Score:	
  

	
  	
  

印 	
  
○

	
  

	
  
TOTAL	  Word	  Count	
  1-­‐10:	
  Matthew	
  Barbee,	
  Kwansei	
  Gakuin,	  2014	
  Rew rite #1
	
  	
  

_____________________________________________T itL eWord	
  Count:	  	
  Matthew	
  Barbee,	
  Kwansei	
  Gakuin,	  2014	  WRITING	
  1A	
  Writing
Portfolio	
  Portfolio Entry #1	
  	
  Choose  one  topic  and  write  about  it.  Be  sure  to  use  complete  sentences  and  use  paragraph  style.  
	  A. Describe	
  an	
  amazing	
  place	  in	
  your	  country.	
  Explain	
  why	
  this	  place	
  is	
  so	
  unusual	  and	
  important	
  to	
  
	
   you.	
  B. 	
   Write	
  about	
  your	  favorite	
  type	  of	
  pet.	
  Why	  do	
  you	
  like	  this	  animal?	
  Do	
  you	  have	  one	  at	
  home?	
  	
   What	
  does	  the	
  animal	
  look	  like?	
  	
  What	  is	
  its	
  name?	
  	
  How	
  old	  is	
  it?	  C. 	
   Write	
  about	
  a	
  place	
  that	  you	
  want	  to	
  live.	
  What	  is	
  the	
  name	  of	
  the	
  city?	
  Where	  is	
  it?	  Explain	
  why	  	
   you	  want	  to	
  live	  in	
  this	  city.	
  

	
  
	
  
	
  
	
  
	
  
	
  
	
  
	
  
	
  
	
  
	
  
	
  
	
  
	
  
	
  
	
  
	
  
	
  
	
  
	
  
	
  
	
  
	
  
	
  
	
  
Peer Edited by	
  ___________________	  Matthew	
  Barbee,	
  Kwansei	
  Gakuin,	  2014	
  Rew rite #2
	
  	
  

_____________________________________________T itL eWord	
  Count:	  Matthew	
  Barbee,	
  Kwansei	
  Gakuin,	  2014	
  Portfolio Entry #2
A. Write	
  about	
  your	  experience	  learning	
  English?	
  	
  How	  do	
  you	
  feel	  about	
  English?	
  What	  is	
  easy	  for	
  you	  to	
  understand	
  in	
  English?	
  	
  What	  are	
  some	  difficulties	
  you	  have	  in	
  English?	
  B. What	  do	
  you	  do	
  in	
  your	  free	  time?	
  Who	  do	
  you	
  spend	  the	
  time	  with?	
  What	  activities	
  do	
  you	  do?	
  How	  much	  time	  do	
  you	
  spend	  doing	  these	
  activities?	
  A re	  your	  free-­‐time	
  activities	  the	  same	
  during	
  the	
  week	  and	  on	  the	
  weekend?	
  

	
  
	
  
	
  
	
  
	
  
	
  
	
  
	
  
	
  
	
  
	
  
	
  
	
  
	
  
	
  
	
  
	
  
	
  
	
  
	
  
	
  
	
  
	
  
	
  
	
  
	
  

Matthew	
  Barbee,	
  Kwansei	
  Gakuin,	  2014	  Peer Edited by	
  ___________________	  Rew rite #3
	
  	
  

_____________________________________________T itL eWord	
  Count:	  Matthew	
  Barbee,	
  Kwansei	
  Gakuin,	  2014	
  Portfolio Entry #3
A.

Answer	  the	
  questions	
  about	
  an	
  interesting	  person	
  that	  you	
  know.	
  U se	  complete	
  sentences	
  to	
  answer	
  the	
  questions.	
  
	
  
A.
Who	
  is	
  the	
  most	  interesting	  person	  you	
  know?	
  ____________________________________________________	
  
	
  

How	
  do	
  you	
  know	  this	  person?	
  _________________________________________________________________	
  
	
   B.
	
   C.
Why	
  is	
  this	  person	
  interesting?	
  List	  3	
  reasons	
  why	
  this	  person	
  is	
  so	
  interesting.	
  Give	  an	
  example	
  to	
  support	
  
	
  
each	
  reason.	
  (Use	  adjectives)	
  	
  i. Reason:	
  _____________________________________________________________________________	  	
  Support:	
  ____________________________________________________________________________	  	
  ii. Reason:	
  _____________________________________________________________________________	  	
  Support:	
  ____________________________________________________________________________	  	
  iii. Reason:	
  _____________________________________________________________________________	
  
	
  
	
  
Support:	
  ____________________________________________________________________________	  	  B. Answer	
  the	
  questions	
  about	
  your	  best	  friend.	
  Use	
  complete	
  sentences	
  to	
  answer	
  the	
  questions.	
  
	
   A.
Who	
  is	
  your	  best	  friend?	
  ______________________________________________________________________	
  
	
  
B.
When	
  and	
  where	  did	
  you	
  meet	  this	  person?	
  ______________________________________________________	
  
	
  
C.
Why	
  is	
  this	  person	
  a	
  good	  friend?	
  List	  3	
  reasons	
  why	
  he/she	
  is	
  a	
  good	  friend.	
  Give	  an	
  example	
  to	
  support	
  each	  	  reason.	
  (Use	  adjectives)	
  	
  i. Reason:	
  _____________________________________________________________________________	
  
	
  
	
  
Support:	
  ____________________________________________________________________________	  	
  ii. Reason:	
  _____________________________________________________________________________	  	
  Support:	
  ____________________________________________________________________________	  	
  iii. Reason:	
  _____________________________________________________________________________	  	
  Support:	
  ____________________________________________________________________________	  	  l Choose	
  
	
   A	
  or	
  B.	
  Copy	  your	  sentences	
  into	
  a	
  paragraph	
  below.	
  Don’t	
  forget	
  to	
  indent	  the	
  first	
  line.	
  	
  
	
  
	
  
	
  
	
  
	
  
	
  
	
  
	
  
	
  
	
  
	
  
	
  
	
  
	
  
	
  
	
  
	
  
	
  
	
  
	
  
	
  
	
  
Matthew	
  Barbee,	
  Kwansei	
  Gakuin,	  2014	  Peer Edited by	
  ___________________	  Rew rite #4____________________________________________
TitL eWord	
  Count:	
  Rew rite #5_____________________________________________
TitL eWord	
  Count:	  Matthew	
  Barbee,	
  Kwansei	
  Gakuin,	  2014	
  Portfolio Entry #4
A. Write	
  about	
  an	
  activity	
  or	
  sport	  that	  you	
  enjoy.	
  Do	
  you	
  like	  to	
  practice?	
  How	
  often?	
  
Why	
  do	
  you	
  enjoy	
  this	  activity	
  or	
  sport?	
  
B. Write	
  about	
  an	
  interesting	
  city.	
  What	  do	
  you	
  know	
  about	
  it?	  Do	  you	
  want	
  to	
  visit	
  that	  city?	  Why?	
  

	
  
	
  
	
  
	
  
	
  
	
  
	
  
	
  
	
  
	
  
	
  
	
  

Peer Edited by	
  ___________________	
  Portfolio Entry #5	
  A. Write	
  about	
  a	
  famous	
  person	
  that	  you	
  like.	
  Who	  is	
  this	  person?	
  What	  is	
  this	  person’s	
  job?	
  Give	  three	  reasons	
  why	
  you	
  like	  this	  person?	
  B. Write	
  about	
  something	
  that	  you	  do	
  not	
  like.	
  Give	  three	  reasons	
  why	
  you	
  don’t	
  like	  this	  thing.	
  	
  How	
  does	  this	  thing	
  make	  you	
  feel?	
  Matthew	
  Barbee,	
  Kwansei	
  Gakuin,	  2014	  Peer Edited by	
  ___________________	  Rew rite #6
	
  	
  

_____________________________________________T itL eWord	
  Count:	  Matthew	
  Barbee,	
  Kwansei	
  Gakuin,	  2014	
  Portfolio Entry #6
A. Write	
  about	
  one	  day	  in	
  the	
  week.	
  	
  What	  is	
  your	  daily	
  routine	  for	  that	
  day?	
  	  What	  time	  do	
  you	
  wake	  up?	
  What	  do	
  you	
  eat	
  for	  breakfast?	
  What	  activities	
  do	
  you	
  do?	
  W hat	  do	
  you	  do	
  to	
  enjoy	
  the	  day?	
  W hat	
  time	  do	
  you	
  sleep?	
  B. Write	
  a	
  paragraph	
  about	
  a	
  member	
  of	
  your	  family.	
  Give	  general	
  information	
  like	  name,	
  age,	
  nationality,	
  job,	
  hobbies,	
  etc.?	
  
C. Which	
  do	
  you	  prefer:	
  Dogs	  or	
  cats?	
  Why?	
  Give	  three	  reasons.	
  

	
  
	
  
	
  
	
  
	
  
	
  
	
  
	
  
	
  

Matthew	
  Barbee,	
  Kwansei	
  Gakuin,	  2014	  Peer Edited by	
  ___________________	  Rew rite #7____________________________________________
TitL eWord	
  Count:	
  Rew rite #8_____________________________________________
TitL eWord	
  Count:	  Matthew	
  Barbee,	
  Kwansei	
  Gakuin,	  2014	
  Portfolio Entry #7
A.

Peer Edited by	
  ___________________	  B.

Write	
  about	
  a	
  restaurant	
  that	  you	
  like.	
  What	  is	
  the	
  name	  of	
  this	  restaurant?	
  Why	  do	
  you	
  like	  it?	
  What	  kind	  of	
  food	  does	
  it	
  serve?	
  What	  is	
  the	
  price	  range?	
  How	  is	
  it	
  decorated?	
  Write	
  about	
  your	  favorite	
  movie.	
  	
  What	  is	
  the	
  title?	
  Who	  are	  the	
  main	
  actors	
  in	
  the	  movie?	
  What	  is	
  the	
  story	
  about?	
  Why	  do	
  you	
  like	  this	  movie?	
  Portfolio Entry #8
A.

Peer Edited by	
  ___________________	  B.

Write	
  about	
  a	
  book	  you	
  read.	
  What	  was	  the	
  title?	
  Who	  was	  the	
  author?	
  Did	
  you	
  like	  it?	
  Who	  was	
  your	  favorite	
  character?	
  What	  was	  the	
  story	
  about?	
  	
  What	  was	
  your	  favorite	
  part	  of	
  the	
  book?	
  Write	
  about	
  a	
  friend	
  from	  junior	
  high	  school	  or	
  high	  school.	
  Who	  was	
  this	  person?	
  Where/How	
  did	
  you	  meet	
  this	  person?	
  What	  was	
  special	
  about	
  this	  person?	
  Matthew	
  Barbee,	
  Kwansei	
  Gakuin,	  2014	
  Rew rite #9
	
  	
  

_____________________________________________T itL eWord	
  Count:	  Matthew	
  Barbee,	
  Kwansei	
  Gakuin,	  2014	
  Portfolio Entry #9

Matthew	
  Barbee,	
  Kwansei	
  Gakuin,	  2014	  Peer Edited by	
  ___________________	
  A. Describe	
  a	
  vacation	
  that	  you	
  and	
  your	  family	
  spent	
  together.	
  Where	  did	
  you	
  go?	  Which	  family	
  members	
  were	  there?	
  What	  did	
  you	  do	
  together?	
  B. Write	
  about	
  something	  embarrassing	
  that	  happened	
  to	
  you.	
  How	
  old	
  were	  you?	
  What	  happened?	
  Why	
  were	  you	
  embarrassed?	
  Who	
  saw	
  this	  happen?	
  How	
  did	
  you	
  feel	  afterwards?	
  Rew rite #10
	
  	
  

_____________________________________________T itL eWord	
  Count:	  Matthew	
  Barbee,	
  Kwansei	
  Gakuin,	  2014	
  Portfolio Entry #10
A. Describe	
  the	  perfect	
  girlfriend/boyfriend.	
  What	  does	  he/she	
  look	  like?	
  What	
  are	
  three	
  good	  points	
  about	  them?	
  What	  advice	
  can	
  you	
  give	  someone	
  who	
  wants	
  to	
  be	
  a	
  better	
  boyfriend/girlfriend?	
  B. What	
  object	
  can	
  you	  not	
  live	  without?	
  What	  is	
  this	  object?	
  How	
  does	  it	
  improve	
  your	  life?	
  	
  What	  would	
  happen	
  if	
  you	
  didn’t	
  have	  it?	  	
  Do	  you	  suggest	
  that	  other	
  people	  buy	
  it?	
  

	
  
	
  
	
  
	
  
	
  
	
  
	
  
	
  
	
  
	
  
	
  
	
  
	
  
	
  
	
  
	
  
	
  
	
  
	
  
	
  
	
  
	
  
	
  
	
  
	
  
	
  
Peer Edited by	
  ___________________
Matthew	
  Barbee,	
  Kwansei	
  Gakuin,	  2014	
  

	
  
	
  

Editing and Grammar Practice
Name:

1A

Class:

Unit Focus Chart
1A

1B

2A

2B

Punctuation.
Run-on sentences.
Sentence fragments.
Missing Words.
Singular/plural nouns.
Quantifier + s/es.
Subject-verb agreement.
Word choice.
Word form.

Misplaced commas.
Independent/dependent clauses.
Comma splices.
Irregular plural nouns.
Common mistakeswith nouns.
Word choice.
Word form.
Articles (a, an, the)Verb tense (present vs.
present continuous).

Commas.
“Because.”
Contractions.
Sentence fragments.
Irregular singular andplural nouns.
Subject-verb agreement.
Word choice.
Word form.
Word order.
Pronoun agreement.
Articles (a, an, the).

Commas.
“Because.”
Contractions.
Sentence fragments.
Singular/plural nouns.
Subject-verb agreement.

Review of all editing
symbols.

Verb tense (irregular).
Prepositions (time).

Review of all editing
symbols.

Unit

1
2
3
4
5

Pronoun agreement.
Verb tense (simple past,present, future)
Prepositions (location/transportation).

Word choice.
Word form.
Infinitives vs. Gerunds
Verb tense (passive).
Irregular verb forms.

Correction Symbols
SYMBOLMEANINGSYMBOLMEANINGppunctuation

wf

wrong formΛ

missing word

wwwrong wordcap

capitalizationwo

wrong word ordervt

verb tense

prep

preposition

s/v

subject-verb agreementart

articlecombinepron

pronoun agreementspspelling

conconnectors/plsingular or pluralreprepetitionX

unnecessary word?

I don’t understand!

Indentparagraph

Connect toprevious sentence¶Start newparagraph1Unit 1

Editing and Grammar Practice

1A

FOCUS: Punctuation. Run-on sentences. Sentence fragments. Missing Words.

A. Sentence Activity
Correct the sentences below. Underline and place correction symbols above each mistake.
Use the correction symbols in the box to the right. Symbols may be used more than once.

p cap

1. My father brother, and sister came to watch my baseball game. (1 mistakes)
2. I love science. Because it is interesting. (2 mistake)
3. Because I disobeyed my mom I cant go to the summer festival on Saturday. (2 mistakes)
4. First Harry Potter is my favorite character, because he has magical powers. (2 mistakes)
5. Snakes and turtles are both reptiles but only turtles have legs. (1 mistake)
6. I often go to karaoke, but never when its a school night. (2 mistakes)

B. Paragraph Editing (12 mistakes)
Correct the paragraph below. First, underline and place correction symbols above themistakes, then rewrite the paragraph to correct any mistakes. Use the correction symbols
in the box to the right. Symbols may be used more than once.

p sp cap

Well, its another rainy day. First, I think I will take a walk around the neyborhood to stretch mylegs. Second I will cook a big breakfast with toast eggs and bacon. After that, I might mow my lawn,because the grass is getting pretty long. Next, maybe I will visit my grand mother. I think she wants me
to go grocery shoping with her. I will ask my brother to come with us but I doubt he will go. Because hedoesnt like going to the grocery store as much as I do.
______________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________

2

Unit 2

Editing and Grammar Practice

1A

FOCUS: Singular/plural nouns. Quantifier + s/es. Subject-verb agreement.

A. Sentence Activity
Correct the sentences below. Fill in the blanks with the singular or plural nouns and the correct verb agreement.

1. Please hand me two forks and two _____________________. (knife)
2. Two _____________________ is a long time to live in another ___________________________. (year, country)
3. We need to walk a few _________________________ to get to the train station. (kilometer)
4. My family _______________________ near the beach in Miyazaki. (live)
5. The _____________________ of Germany _______________________ very friendly. (person, be verb)

B. Paragraph Editing (11 mistakes)

Correct the paragraph below. First, underline and place correction symbols
above the mistakes, then rewrite the paragraph to correct any mistakes.
Use the correction symbols in the box to the right. Symbols may be used
more than once.

p s/v s/pl sp

My girlfriend had a terrible cold for several day. She blew her nose sneezed, and coughed.
Yesterday, I made her chicken soup, and told her to drink orange juice. Because they is good for a cold.
After that, she went to the docter. There were many persons in the waiting room, but we could see thedoctor quickly. The doctor gave her some medicines, and she has been in bed since then. Today, she isfeeling much better. She was even able to visit the park for two hour. I really hope she doesn’t get sickagain soon. We is very tired of the sneezing and coughing.
______________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________

3

Unit 3

Editing and Grammar Practice

1A

FOCUS: Word choice. Word form

A. Sentence Activity
Correct the sentences below. Choose the correct words to complete the sentences.

1. I am ( interested / interesting ) in the ( exited / exciting ) rides at Universal Studios.
2. As the (entered children / children entered ), the room was filled with ( happy / happiness ).
3. The ( scary / scared ) part of the story really ( scary / scared ) the children in library.
4. As the temperature ( rows / rose / roze ), the amount of snow also ( decreased / increased ).
5. I often buy ( close / clothes ) at the mall because it is ( convenient / useful ).

B. Paragraph Editing (13 mistakes)

Correct the paragraph below. First, underline and place correction symbols
above the mistakes, then rewrite the paragraph to correct any mistakes. Use thecorrection symbols in the box to the right. Symbols may be used more than once.

wo ww wf cap

s/v s/plsp

If you want to have an amazed time at Disney World, I will give you some advices. First, you
should arrive as early as possible. You want to have much as time in the park as you can because there
are many interested rides and things to do, For example, Space Mountain, the monorail, and the merrygo-round. Number too, you should go to the most exciting attractions first. That is because they is themost populer, and many persons will be in line. It is very convenient to make a list. Last, make sure you
meet the Disney characters. You will forget never your time, if you have a piksure with Mickey Mouse. I
hope you enjoy your visit.
______________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________

4

Unit 4

Editing and Grammar Practice

1A

FOCUS: Pronoun agreement, Verb tense (simple past, present, future)

A. Sentence Activity
Correct the sentences below. Choose the correct pronoun or article to complete the sentence.

1. My mother cooks dinner three nights a week. ( She / Her / His ) best dish is chicken nanban.
2. Next, you will see ( a / an ) large tree. When you arrive at ( a / the / none ) tree, turn left.
3. Mr. Ayano loves ( he / him / his ) two dogs. (His / They / Their ) names are Pochi and Koro.
4. The audience had ( a / an / none ) hour before the concert. So, ( it / they ) all went to eat first.
5. Ms. Ann told me to put ( her / some / the ) boxes by the door. ( She / He ) said ( it / they ) are heavy.

B. Paragraph Editing (12 mistakes)
Correct the paragraph below. First, underline and place correction
symbols above the mistakes, then rewrite the paragraph to correct any
mistakes. Use the correction symbols in the box to the right. Symbols may
be used more than once.

art

ww

wf

s/v

pron

Λ

s/pl

x

s/pl

sp

My best friends are Hiro and Ayaka. This does not mean that them are alike. In fact, they is very
different. One difference is their personality. For example, Hiro is very funny, while Ayaka is more
serious. Another difference is there hobbies. Hiro loves sing, and Ayaka loves a video games. Hiro andme often go to karaoke together, while Ayaka and he often spend time at game center. Even though
Hiro and Ayaka are different, them have big similarity. That is, they both love scared movies. The threeof us often watch horror movies together.
______________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________

5

Unit 5

1A

Editing and Grammar Practice

FOCUS: Prepositions (location/transportation)

A. Sentence Activity

Correct the sentences below. Choose the correct verb or preposition to complete the sentences.

1. I want to have the party ( in / on / at ) May, but I am busy ( in / on / at ) May 5th.
2. My sister was born ( in / on / at ) June 13, 1995. I was born ten years later ( in / on / at ) 2005.
3. Last week, my bus ( leaved / left /) ( in / on / at ) 12:30 ( in / on / at ) Friday.
4. Lisa has not ( ride / rode / ridden ) a horse before, but her son ( ride / rode / ridden ) yesterday.
5. I ( buyed / bought / have bought ) flowers two days ago, but now they are ( died / dead / dying ).

B. Paragraph Editing (13 mistakes)
Correct the paragraph below. First, underline and place correction symbols
above the mistakes, then rewrite the paragraph to correct any mistakes. Use thecorrection symbols in the box to the right. Symbols may be used more than once.

prep vt Λ x
pron

wf

s/pl

art

sp

It is always a good idea to plan a vacation before you go. At April I will go to California next
month. My airplane left Tokyo at midnight in April 2nd, and it will arrive in San Francisco on noon thenext day. The first day of my trip, I planning to visit a San Francisco Bay Aquarium. On the afternoon of
the second day, my plan is to go skydiving. That night, I want to made a reservation on seven o’clock at
the Old Bay Restaurant. At the last day of the trip, I took a cruise around the Bay. I’m sure they will bebeautiful. With careful planning, I thought my vacation will be great.
______________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________

6

	
  
	
  

1B	
  

	
  
	
  
	
  
	
  
	
  
	
  
	
  
	
  
	
  

	
  
	
  
	
  
	
  
	
  
	
  
	
  
	
  

Name:

Matthew	
  Barbee,	
  Kwansei	
  Gakuin,	  2014	
  Class:

	  Kwansei Gakuin University	
  Department of Science and Technology
Instructor: Matthew Barbee	  Correction Symbols

Incorrect Sentence

Matthew	
  Barbee,	
  Kwansei	
  Gakuin,	  2014	  Correct Sentence

	
  
	
  
	
  
Name:	
  ______________________________________________	  	
  Class:__________________	
  

	
  	
  

Table	  of	
  Contents	
  Peer-­‐	  edited	  by:	
  Title	
  Rewrite	  Check	  Word	
  Count	
  

1.	
  
2.	
  
3.	
  
4.	
  
5.	
  

	
  
	
  
	
  
	
  
	
  

	
  
	
  
	
  
	
  
	
  

	
  
	
  
	
  
	
  
	
  

	
  

	
  

	
  

	
  

Teacher	  Comments:	  Score:	
  

	
  	
  

印 	
  
○

	
  	
  
Peer-­‐	  edited	  by:	
  Title	
  Rewrite	  Check	  Word	
  Count	
  

6.	
  
7.	
  
8.	
  
9.	
  
10.	
  

	
  
	
  
	
  
	
  
	
  

	
  
	
  
	
  
	
  
	
  

	
  
	
  
	
  
	
  
	
  

	
  

	
  

	
  

	
  

Teacher	  Comments:	  Score:	
  

	
  	
  

印 	
  
○

	
  

	
  
TOTAL	  Word	  Count	
  1-­‐10:	
  Matthew	
  Barbee,	
  Kwansei	
  Gakuin,	  2014	
  Rew rite #1
	
  	
  

_____________________________________________T itL eWord	
  Count:	  	
  Matthew	
  Barbee,	
  Kwansei	
  Gakuin,	  2014	  WRITING	
  1B	
  Writing
Portfolio	
  Portfolio Entry #1	
  	
  Choose  one  topic  and  write  about  it.  Be  sure  to  use  complete  sentences  and  use  paragraph  style.  
	  A. What	  did	
  you	  do	
  over	  summer	  break?	
  	
  Where	  did	
  you	
  go?	
  Who	
  did	
  you	  go	
  with?	
  What	  was	
  your	  	
   best	  memory?	
  	
  	
  
B. 	
   What	  do	
  you	
  wish	  you	
  did	
  over	  summer	  break?	
  	
  What	  plans	
  would	
  you	  have	  m ade	  if	
  you	
  could	
  	
   have	
  done	  anything?	
  	
  W here	
  would	
  you	  have	  gone?	
  Who	
  would	
  you	
  want	  to	
  go	
  with?	
  	
  	
  
C. 	
   Is	  it	
  better	
  to	
  work	  during	
  summer	  break	  or	
  have	  a	
  lot	  of	
  free	  time?	
  Give	  reasons	
  for	
  your	  answer.	
  

	
  
	
  
	
  
	
  
	
  
	
  
	
  
	
  
	
  
	
  
	
  
	
  
	
  
	
  
	
  
	
  
	
  
	
  
	
  
	
  
	
  
	
  
	
  
	
  
	
  
	
  
Peer Edited by	
  ___________________	  Matthew	
  Barbee,	
  Kwansei	
  Gakuin,	  2014	
  Rew rite #2
	
  	
  

_____________________________________________T itL eWord	
  Count:	  Matthew	
  Barbee,	
  Kwansei	
  Gakuin,	  2014	
  Portfolio Entry #2
	
  
	
  
	
  
	
  
	
  

A. Do	
  you	
  think	
  professional	
  athletes	
  receive	
  too	  much	  money?	
  Why	  or	
  why	  not?	
  B. A	
  year	  of	
  high	  school	
  in	
  America	
  lasts	
  from	  September	
  to	
  May	
  with	  a	
  3-­‐month	
  summer,	  while	  a	
  Japanese	
  school	
  year	  starts	
  in	
  April	  and	
  ends	  in	
  March.	
  	
  Which	  do	
  you	  prefer,	  starting	
  school	
  in	
  September	
  or	
  in	
  April?	
  C. Have	
  you	
  ever	  had	  an	
  argument	
  with	  your	  parents?	
  	
  Write	
  about	
  a	
  time	  when	
  you	  disagreed	
  
with	
  an	
  older	  family	
  m ember.	
  	
  What	  was	  the	
  argument	
  about?	
  What	  happened?	
  In	
  the	
  end,	
  did	
  you	
  win	  the	
  argument?	
  

	
  
	
  
	
  
	
  
	
  
	
  
	
  
	
  
	
  
	
  
	
  
	
  
	
  
	
  
	
  
	
  
	
  
	
  
	
  
	
  
	
  
	
  
	
  
	
  
	
  

Peer Edited by	
  ___________________	  Matthew	
  Barbee,	
  Kwansei	
  Gakuin,	  2014	
  Rew rite #3
	
  	
  

_____________________________________________T itL eWord	
  Count:	  Matthew	
  Barbee,	
  Kwansei	
  Gakuin,	  2014	
  Portfolio Entry #3
	
   questions	
  below	
  in	
  complete	
  sentences.	
  	
  When	
  you	
  finish,	
  combine	
  your	  sentences	
  into	
  a	
  paragraph	
  below.	
  	
  	
  
Answer	  the	
  
	
  1.	
  Do	
  you	
  think	
  Japan	
  should	
  allow	
  more	  immigrants	
  into	  the	
  country?	
  Why	  or	
  why	  not?	
  	  	
  _____________________________________________________________________________________________	  	
  _____________________________________________________________________________________________	
  
	
  
	
  2.	
  Why	  do	
  you	
  believe	
  your	  opinion?	
  Give	  3	
  reasons	
  why	  or	
  why	  not	  Japan	
  should	
  allow	
  more	  immigrants.	
  	
  Also,	  provide	  support	
  	
  for	
  each	  reason.	
  
	
  
i.	
  	
  Reason:	
  _____________________________________________________________________________	
  
	
  
	
  	
  	
  	
  
	
  	
  	
  	
  Support:	
  ____________________________________________________________________________	
  
	
  
i.	
  	
  Reason:	
  _____________________________________________________________________________	
  
	
  
	
  	
  	
  	
  	
  Support:	
  ____________________________________________________________________________	
  
	
  	
  
	
  
i.	
  	
  Reason:	
  _____________________________________________________________________________	
  
	
  	
  
	
  	
  	
  	
  	
  Support:	
  ____________________________________________________________________________	
  
	
  
our	
  friend	
  disagrees	
  with	  you!	
  What	  might	
  your	  friend	
  say?	
  (Give	
  one	
  reason	
  AGAINST	
  your	  own	
  opinion.)	
  	
  
	
  3.	
  Yはんたいいけん	
  「反対意見」______________________________________________________________________________	
  	
  _____________________________________________________________________________________________	
  
	
  
はんろん
	
  4.	
  How	
  would	
  you	
  reply	
  to	
  your	  friend	
  in	
  #3?	  (Tell	
  why	  the	
  opposite	
  opinion	
  is	
  weak	  or	
  not	
  good?	
  「 反 論 する」	  
	  _____________________________________________________________________________________________	
  
	
  
	
  _____________________________________________________________________________________________	
  
	
  5.	
  Overall,	
  what	  is	
  your	  main	  opinion	
  again?	
  (RESTATE	  your	  original	
  opinion	
  from	  #1)	  	  _____________________________________________________________________________________________	
  
	
  
	
  _____________________________________________________________________________________________	
  
	
  
	
  
	
  
	
  
	
  
	
  
	
  
	
  
	
  
	
  
	
  
	
  
	
  
	
  
	
  
	
  
	
  
	
  
	
  
	
  
	
  
Matthew	
  Barbee,	
  Kwansei	
  Gakuin,	  2014	  Peer Edited by	
  ___________________	  Rew rite #4____________________________________________
TitL eWord	
  Count:	
  Rew rite #5_____________________________________________
TitL eWord	
  Count:	  Matthew	
  Barbee,	
  Kwansei	
  Gakuin,	  2014	
  Portfolio Entry #4
	
  
	
  
	
  

(100 words)

A. Have	
  you	
  heard	  of	
  “herbivore	
  men”?	
  Herbivore	
  men	
  (草食(系)男子,	
  Sōshoku(-­‐kei)	
  danshi)	
  or	
  grass-­‐eaters	
  are	  a	
  social	
  phenomenon	
  in	
  Japan	
  of	
  men	
  who	
  shun	
  marriage	
  or	
  gaining	
  a	
  girlfriend.	
  	
  What	  is	
  your	  opinion	
  about	  them?	
  	
  Have	  Japanese	
  men	
  changed	
  over	  time?	
  Give	  three	
  reasons	
  for	
  your	  opinion.	
  
B. J-­‐pop	
  and	
  Enka	  are	  the	  major	
  types	  of	  music	
  genres	  in	
  Japan.	
  	
  Which	
  genre	  do	
  you	
  think	
  better	  represents	
  Japanese	
  culture?	
  	
  What	  are	
  three	  reasons	
  for	
  your	  opinion?	
  

	
  
	
  
	
  
	
  
	
  
	
  
	
  
	
  
	
  
	
  

Peer Edited by	
  ___________________	
  Portfolio Entry #5(100 words)

FREEWRITING.	
  Write	  a	
  paragraph	
  about	
  any	
  topic	
  that	  you	
  want.	
  	
  Peer Edited by	
  ___________________	  Matthew	
  Barbee,	
  Kwansei	
  Gakuin,	  2014	
  Rew rite #6
	
  	
  

_____________________________________________
T it LeWord	  Count:	  Matthew	
  Barbee,	
  Kwansei	
  Gakuin,	  2014	
  Portfolio Entry #6(150 words)

A. What	
  is	
  the	  best	  age	  to	
  get	
  married?	
  	
  Do	
  you	
  think	
  that	  there	  is	  a	
  different	
  standard	
  for	  men	
  and	
  women?	
  	
  Has	  the	
  average	
  age	  of	
  marriage	
  in	
  Japan	
  changed	
  over	  time?	
  	
  What	  do	
  you	
  think	
  about	
  it	
  and	
  what	  age	  do	
  you	
  think	  you	
  will	  get	
  married?	
  	
  W hy?	
  	
  (If	
  you	
  don’t	
  think	
  about	
  m arriage	
  or	
  don’t	
  want	  to	
  get	
  m arried,	
  please	
  tell	
  why?)	
  	
  (Give	  three	  reasons	
  for	
  your	  opinion.)	
  
B. Same-­‐sex	
  marriage	
  is	
  a	
  controversial	
  topic	
  around	  the	
  world.	
  	
  While	  gay	
  couples	
  can	
  get	
  married	  in	
  England,	
  Canada,	
  most	  of	
  Europe,	
  and	
  some	  states	
  in	
  A merica,	
  other	
  countries	
  forbid	  gay	
  marriage	
  and	
  even	
  punish	  or	
  kill	  gay	
  people.	
  	
  First,	  what	  is	
  same-­‐sex	
  marriage?	
  	
  
Do	
  you	
  agree	  or	
  disagree	
  with	  it?	  	
  Should	
  same-­‐sex	
  marriage	
  be	
  allowed	
  in	
  Japan?	
  (Give	
  three	
  reasons	
  for	
  your	  opinion.)	
  

	
  
	
  
	
  
	
  
	
  
	
  
	
  
	
  
	
  

Matthew	
  Barbee,	
  Kwansei	
  Gakuin,	  2014	  Peer Edited by	
  ___________________	  Rew rite #7____________________________________________
TitL eWord	
  Count:	
  Rew rite #8_____________________________________________
TitL eWord	
  Count:	  Matthew	
  Barbee,	
  Kwansei	
  Gakuin,	  2014	
  Portfolio Entry #7(100 words)

Choose	  one	
  topic	
  and	
  white	  a	
  paragraph.	
  	
  Use	  the	
  topic	
  as	
  your	  first	  sentence.	
  	
  Give	  three	  causes	
  OR	
  effects	
  for	  the	
  topic	
  that	  you	
  choose.	
  	
  
A.	
  Smart	  phones	
  have	  had	  several	
  important	
  effects	
  on	
  society.	
  
B.	
  	
  The	  typhoon	
  caused	
  several	
  problems	
  in	
  our	
  town.	
  C.	
  	
  American	
  culture	
  has	
  spread	
  around	  the	
  world.	
  	
  There	  are	  many	  causes	
  for	
  this.	
  Peer Edited by	
  ___________________	
  

	
  

Portfolio Entry #8(100 words)

FREEWRITING!	
  	
  Peer Edited by	
  ___________________	
  

	
  

Matthew	
  Barbee,	
  Kwansei	
  Gakuin,	  2014	
  Rew rite #9	  _____________________________________________T itL eWord	
  Count:	  Matthew	
  Barbee,	
  Kwansei	
  Gakuin,	  2014	
  Portfolio Entry #9(200 words)

Peer Edited by	
  ___________________	
  A. Bullying	
  is	
  a	
  serious	
  problem	
  in	
  Japan.	
  	
  Sometimes	
  it	
  leads	
  to	
  depression	
  and	
  sometimes	
  it	
  leads	  to	
  suicide.	
  	
  First,	  what	  is	
  bullying?	
  	
  Have	  you	
  seen	  or	  do	
  you	
  know	
  examples	  of	
  bullying	
  from	  your	  school	  life?	
  	
  How	
  does	  a	
  person	
  who	  is	
  being	  bullied	
  feel?	
  	
  Last,	
  what	  are	
  ways	  that	  we	
  can	
  stop	  bullying?	
  	  (200	
  words)	
  
B. Have	
  you	
  ever	  bullied	  or	
  helped	
  friends	
  bully	
  someone?	
  	
  Why	
  did	
  you	  do	
  it?	  	
  What	  actions	
  did	
  you	  do?	
  	
  What	  did	
  other	
  people	  do	
  when	
  they	  saw	  the	
  bullying	
  happen?	
  	
  How	  do	
  you	
  think	
  the	
  bullied	
  person	  felt?	
  	
  If	
  you	
  could	
  apologize	
  to	
  that	  person,	
  what	  would	
  you	
  say?	
  Matthew	
  Barbee,	
  Kwansei	
  Gakuin,	  2014	
  Rew rite #10
	
  	
  

_____________________________________________T itL eWord	
  Count:	  Matthew	
  Barbee,	
  Kwansei	
  Gakuin,	  2014	
  Portfolio Entry #10
	  Complete	  the	
  sentence	
  and	
  write	  a	
  paragraph	
  about	  the	
  topic.	
  	
  Tell	  me	
  as	
  much	  information	
  about	  the	
  topic	
  as	
  you	
  know.	
  	
  

	
  

	
  	
  

Unique	  and	
  Mysterious	
  Japan	
  

	
  
	
  
	
  
	
  

(200 words)“Japan	  has	  many	  unique	
  points.	
  	
  It	
  is	
  an	
  ancient	
  country	
  with	  a	
  unique	
  culture.	
  	
  There	  is	
  one	  part	  of	
  Japanese	
  culture	
  that	  is	
  unknown	
  and	  very	  mysterious	
  to	
  foreigners.	
  	
  This	  part	  of	
  Japanese	
  culture	
  is	
  called	
  ___________	  in	
  Japanese.	
  	
  In	
  English,	
  it	
  means	
  ___________.”	
  	
  	
  

	
  
[Rewrite	
  the	  Introduction	
  above]	
  

	
  
	
  
	
  
	
  
	
  
	
  
	
  
	
  
	
  
	
  
	
  
	
  
	
  
	
  
	
  
	
  
	
  
	
  
	
  
	
  
	
  
	
  
	
  
	
  
Matthew	
  Barbee,	
  Kwansei	
  Gakuin,	  2014	  Peer Edited by	
  ___________________	  Editing and Grammar Practice
Name:

1B

Class:

Unit Focus Chart
Unit

1
2
3
4
5

1A

1B

2A

2B

Punctuation.
Run-on sentences.
Sentence fragments.
Missing Words.
Singular/plural nouns.
Quantifier + s/es.
Subject-verb
agreement.
Word choice.
Word form.

Misplaced commas.
Independent/dependent clauses.
Comma splices.
Irregular plural nouns.
Common mistakes withnouns.

Commas.
“Because.”
Contractions.
Sentence fragments.
Singular/plural nouns.
Subject-verb
agreement.

Word choice.
Word form.
Articles (a, an, the)Verb tense (present vs.
present continuous).

Commas.
“Because.”
Contractions.
Sentence fragments.
Irregular singular andplural nouns.
Subject-verb
agreement.
Word choice.
Word form.
Word order.
Pronoun agreement.
Articles (a, an, the).

Review of all editing
symbols.

Verb tense (irregular).
Prepositions (time).

Review of all editing
symbols.

Pronoun agreement.
Verb tense (simple past,present, future)
Prepositions (location/transportation).

Word choice.
Word form.
Infinitives vs. Gerunds
Verb tense (passive).
Irregular verb forms.

Correction Symbols
SYMBOLMEANINGSYMBOLMEANINGppunctuation

wf

wrong formΛ

missing word

wwwrong wordcap

capitalizationwo

wrong word ordervt

verb tense

prep

preposition

s/v

subject-verb agreementart

articlecombinepron

pronoun agreementspspelling

conconnectors/plsingular or pluralreprepetitionX

unnecessary word?

I don’t understand!

Indentparagraph

Connect toprevious sentence¶Start newparagraph

Editing and Grammar Practice

1B
7

Unit 1

FOCUS: Commas. Independent/dependent clauses

A. Sentence Activity

p cap

Correct the sentences below. Underline and place correction symbols above each mistake.
Use the correction symbols in the box to the right. Symbols may be used more than once.

1. Its not polite to eat with your mouth open. (1 mistake)
2. Because it’s a holiday, she will go to the bakery get a haircut and go to the park. (2 mistakes)
3. The dog played with it’s toys all morning. For example, a ball and a rope. (3 mistakes)
4. I often like to read at a cafe. Because its quiet and the atmosphere is comfortable. (4 mistakes)
5. Second Asuka loves to go to the park because she can run free, and play on the swing set. (2 mistakes)

B. Paragraph Editing (10 mistakes)

Correct the paragraph below. First, underline and place correction symbols above themistakes, then rewrite the paragraph to correct any mistakes. Use the correction
symbols in the box to the right. Symbols may be used more than once.

p cap sp

Daisuke has been applying for full–time jobs in Osaka, and Kyoto. Last week, he received a callfrom a computer company in tokyo. They asked Daisuke to fry to Tokyo for a job interview. Daisuke
agreed to go to the interview. Because the company offered to pay for Daisuke’s airplane ticket. Since
then, Daisuke has been busy collecting informaton about the company. Next he also went shopping for
a new suite. Also, Daisuke has been rehearsing for the interview, because he wants to do his best,
impress the company and get a job. Hes looking forward to working at a new place.
______________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________

8

Unit 2

Editing and Grammar Practice

1B

FOCUS: Irregular plural nouns. Common mistakes with nouns.

A. Sentence Activity
Correct the sentences below. Fill in the blanks with the singular or plural nouns and the correct verb agreement.

1. The animals ( was / were ) taken to the farm in two ( vehicle / vehicles ).
2. In the summer, I love eating ( fruit / fruits ), but in the winter I prefer ( vegetable / vegetables ).
3. I must win two (match / matches ) before I can get a trophy.
4. Three years ( is / are ) a long time to not buy new (cloths / clothes ).
5. She ( like / likes ) Aoto and Mari. They are very generous ( person / persons / people ).

B. Paragraph Editing (12 mistakes)

Correct the paragraph below. First, underline and place correction
symbols above the mistakes, then rewrite the paragraph to correct
any mistakes. Use the correction symbols in the box to the right.
Symbols may be used more than once.

s/v s/pl sp p cap

Since I was a little girl, I have always loved science-fiction movie. There are several reason that I
likes them. First I have always been interested in the future. I love to imagine what the future will be
like. Will it be a wonderful utopia or a nightmare filled with scary alien? My second reason is, because I
love technologies. Sci-fi is full of robots, spaceships, and computer. Finally, I think sci-fi is great because
it is full of imagination. Of course, all movies and TV shows is creative. But I love seeing lives and worldsthat only ekzist in the imagination. To me, science-fiction is the best movie genre.

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9Unit 3

1B

Editing and Grammar Practice

FOCUS: Word choice. Word form. Articles (a, an, the)A. Sentence Activity
Correct the sentences below. Choose the correct words to complete the sentences OR correct the underlined words.

1. I like to walking in the park because it helps me clear my mind. ( _____________________ )2. The ( scary / scared ) part of the ride ( scary / scared ) all the children at the party.
3. My friends and I love ride the roller coasters at the theme park. ( _____________________ )4. The students were ( exited / exciting ) about the ( interested / interesting ) events at the festival.
5. Eat onions, to watching scary movies, and bugs are the things I hate. ( ________________ / _________________ )B. Paragraph Editing (10 mistakes)
Correct the paragraph below. First, underline and place correction symbols
above the mistakes, then rewrite the paragraph to correct any mistakes. Use thecorrection symbols in the box to the right. Symbols may be used more than once.

ww
Λ

wf

s/pl

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sp x

I have travelled to many interested countries around the world. While all of them are exciting tovisit, I have three favorite country. The first country, is Thailand. It is one of my favorites because of thebeaches and the mountains. I like to swimming at the beach and ride elephants in the mountains.
Besides Thailand I also like India. The food in India is my favorite cuisine. Everything is dericious, forexample, the curries, the breads, and the yogurt lassies. Last, I love go to Jordan. Besides the natureand the food, I am amazing at the landmarks and the desserts. Petra is my favorite World Heritage Site.
That is why I love Thailand, India, and Jordan.
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10

Unit 4

Editing and Grammar Practice

1B

FOCUS: Verb tense (present vs. present continuous)

A. Sentence Activity
Correct the sentences below. Write the correct form of the verb in the blanks to complete the sentences.

1. The house _________ _______________ 100 years ago.

(build)2. After all the goals ____________ _________________, the game was ___________________.

(miss, lose)

3. Hundreds of languages ___________ ___________________ at the United Nations every day.

(speak)4. You can’t enter now; the office _________ ______________ _________________ at the moment.

(clean)5. Don’t worry about the money, the car _________ ______________ _________________ now.

(sell)

6. My favorite coffee cup ___________ _________________ by the dog yesterday.

(broke)B. Paragraph Editing (11 mistakes)
Correct the paragraph below. First, underline and place correction symbols
above the mistakes, then rewrite the paragraph to correct any mistakes. Use thecorrection symbols in the box to the right. Symbols may be used more than once.

vt

Λ wf conx pron s/pl art
s/pl

sp

The best experience of my life happen last summer. For three months, I studied abroad in

Florida, U.S.A. I really had a great time in Florida, I did many amazed things. One of the thing I did was
to swimming with dolphins. It was very cute. Next, I really enjoyed my host family. A family consisted ofa father, a mother, and two twin girls. My breakfast and dinner maked everyday by father. Everyone
were so kind. Another good experience was seeing the original Florida State Capitol Building. It wasbuild in 1845. Overall, I had a great time in Florida.
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Unit 5

Editing and Grammar Practice

1B

FOCUS: Review of all the symbols

Correct the paragraphs below. First, underline and placecorrection symbols above the mistakes, then correct the
mistakes. Use any of the correction symbols in the box tothe right. Some symbols may be used more than once or
not at all.

p Λ caps/pl x wf
art pron

vt
ww
con

s/v
sp
wo prep
rep

A. Paragraph 1 (15 mistakes)
My trip to the United States were big shock. One day, my mother said, “Go and pack your cloths.
We are going to New York tomorrow, and they are going to live there.” The news was a complete
surprise to me. I went to my room and sit on the bed for a long time. After that I called my best friend
and telled him a news. The next morning, my mother and I got on a airplane in eight 0’clock. I
remember sitting next to the window, and looking down on my City. I was scared. Because I didn’tknow my future. My life charged overnight. I never forget that trip.

B. Paragraph 2 (14 mistakes)
In my opinion, violent video games is harmful to young children. First studies show that playing
these games cause changes in the behavior of young people. According to researchers, playing thesegames after, young people have more more angry feelings. In addition, players get into fights at
school. Players have arguments with they teachers. _ Second reason is that violent video games makeyoung people less sensitive too violence in the world. I beleive that games make it entertaining toshoot and kill. Childs may forget the line between fantasy and reality. Lastly, these types of games
teach children that it is ok to use vilence to solve their problem. Violence is never the solution.
Therefore, violent games are not for young people, and it should be banned.

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WRITING!2A!

Writing
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Portfolio Entry #1!
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Choose&one&topic&and&write&about&it.&Be&sure&to&use&complete&sentences&and&use&paragraph&style.&#

A. Write#about#learning#something#new.#What#would#you#like#to#learn?#Why#do#you#want#to#learn#it?## What#would#you#do#with#the#new#information#or#skill?#
B. # Write#about#what#you#did#during#the#break.#What#did#you#do#and#when?#Where#did#you#go#and## who#did#you#go#with?#What#is#the#best#part#of#your#break?#C. # Write#about#a#famous#person#you#would#like#to#meet.#What#has#this#person#done#that#is#interesting## to#you?#What#would#you#talk#about?#What#would#you#like#to#learn#from#meeting#him#or#her?#

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A. Write#about#a#place#that#you#have#visited#on#vacation#or#for#a#school#trip.#Where#is#it?#Why#
did#you#want#to#go#there?#What#activities#did#you#do#there?#What#is#the#best#thing#about#
this#place?#
B. Write#about#your#favorite#relative.#Who#is#this#person?#What#job#does#he/she#have?#What#qualities#make#this#person#special?#How#do#you#feel#when#you#are#around#this#person?#
C. In#your#opinion,#is#English#a#good#second#language#to#learn?#Why#or#why#not?#Give#three#reasons#for#your#opinion.#

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Portfolio Entry #3#
A. Answer#the#questions#about#two!large!cities#that#you#have#visited.#Use#complete#sentences#to#answer#the#questions.### A. What#two#large#cities#have#you#visited?#______________________________________________## B. Where#are#the#two#cities?#_________________________________________________________## C. Which#city#is#better?#List#3#reasons#why#one#is#better#than#the#other.#Give#an#example#to#support#
each#reason.#____________#is#a#better#city#than#_____________.##
i. Reason:#____________________________________________________________________##
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ii. Reason:#____________________________________________________________________##
Support:#____________________________________________________________________##
iii. Reason:#____________________________________________________________________##
Support:#____________________________________________________________________##
B. Answer#the#questions#about!two!different!restaurants#that#you#have#eaten#at.#Use#complete#sentences#to##
answer#the#questions.## A. Which#two#fast#food#restaurants#have#you#eaten#at?#____________________________________## B. What#type#of#food#do#they#serve?#___________________________________________________## C. Which#restaurant#is#better?#List#3#reasons#why#one#is#better#than#the#other.#Give#an#example#to#
support#each#reason.#______________#is#better#than#_______________.##
i. Reason:#____________________________________________________________________##
Support:#____________________________________________________________________##
ii. Reason:#____________________________________________________________________##
Support:#____________________________________________________________________##
iii. Reason:#____________________________________________________________________##
Support:#____________________________________________________________________###! Choose&A&or&B.&Copy&your&sentences&into&a&paragraph&below.&Don’t&forget&to&indent&the&first&line.&&
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Portfolio Entry #4
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Write#about#an#interesting#place#to#visit#in#your#hometown#or#prefecture.#Where#is#it?#What#is#special#about#this#place?#What#is#the#history?#What#should#a#visitor#do#or#try#there?##Write#about#a#great#job#that#you#want#or#you#think#you#be#interesting#to#do.#What#kind#of#
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Give#some#advice#about#doing#something,#such#as#choosing#a#cellphone,#buying#a#car,#or#choosing#a#
university.##What#should#a#person#know#when#making#that#choice?#What#steps#should#a#person#follow?###
Write#about#your#perfect#travel#destination.#Where#would#it#be?#Why#is#this#a#good#place?#What#would#
you#do#there?#If#you#could#have#super#powers,#which#powers#would#you#have?##Why#would#you#choose#those#
powers?##What#would#you#do#with#your#powers?##Would#you#be#good#or#bad?##What#would#your#name#be?#Matthew#Barbee,#Kwansei#Gakuin,#2014#

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Portfolio Entry #6(150 words)

A. In#your#opinion,#is#it#a#good#idea#to#make#students#wear#school#
uniforms?#Give#three!reasons#to#support#your#opinion.#
B. What#do#you#think#will#be#the#highest#paying#job#in#50#years#from#now?#Give!three!reasons#to#support#your#opinion.#
C. What#are#the#best#snack#foods?#Choose#two!foods!and#give#two!
reasons!each!why#each#food#is#a#good#choice.#

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Portfolio Entry #7
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What#is#the#definition#of#a#perfect#parent?#What#are#the#characteristics#of#such#a#person?#Give#examples#and#details#of#each#characteristic.##
Choose#a#mechanical#device,#such#as#a#watch,#a#coffee#maker,#a#smart#phone,#or#an#MP3#player?##How#does#
it#work?#Explain#the#process#step#by#step.#
Killing#whales#is#a#controversial#activity#in#the#world.#Do#you#think#it#is#right#or#wrong#to#kill#whales?#Give#three#reasons#for#your#opinion.#

Peer Edited by#___________________#C.

(100 words)

Portfolio Entry #8
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B.

C.

(100 words)

Choose#one:##love,#jealousy,#fear.#How#does#the#dictionary#define#this#emotion?#Is#it#a#good#emotion#or#a#
bad#emotion?#Who#usually#feels#this#emotion#and#why?#Give#some#examples#when#you#feel#this#way.#
What#is#the#definition#of#stereotype?#How#does#a#stereotypical#boy#act?#How#does#a#stereotypical#girl#act?#
Do#you#think#that#boys#and#girls#are#different?#Do#you#think#it#is#fair#that#society#has#different#expectations#for#the#boys#and#girls?#Explain.#
What#is#laughter?#What#makes#you#laugh?#What#are#the#effects#of#laughter#in#a#person’s#life?#

Peer Edited by#___________________##

Matthew#Barbee,#Kwansei#Gakuin,#2014#

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Matthew#Barbee,#Kwansei#Gakuin,#2014#

Portfolio Entry #9
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B.

Write#a#paragraph#in#which#you#define#the#word#pride.##What#is#it?#What#is#its#purpose?#When#should#people#
feel#pride?#Can#pride#be#negative?#When#can#a#person#have#too#much#pride?#
Same;sex#marriage#is#a#controversial#topic#in#America#and#Japan#these#days.##While#gay#people#can#get#married#in#England#and#Canada,#only#some#parts#of#America#allow#it#and#it#is#still#illegal#in#Japan.##What#is#same;sex#marriage?#Do#you#agree#or#disagree#with#it?#What#are#three#reasons#that#it#should#be#allowed#or#not#allowed#in#Japan?#Compare#two#countries.##[For#example,#America#versus#England,#Japan#versus#Korea,#China#versus#______________,#etc.]##How#are#the#two#countries#the#same?##How#are#they#different?##Finally,#which#do#you#
think#is#a#better#country#to#visit?#

Peer Edited by#___________________#C.

(200 words)

Matthew#Barbee,#Kwansei#Gakuin,#2014#

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Matthew#Barbee,#Kwansei#Gakuin,#2014#

Portfolio Entry #10(200 words)

A. Write#about#what#you#need#to#do#to#get#a#driver’s#license.#What#are#the#steps#involved?####(6#steps)#
B. What#is#the#best#way#to#make#new#friends?#What#can#you#do#to#make#more#friends?#Please#give#examples#and#details.####(7#steps)#
C. What#is#obesity?#What#causes#obesity#in#children?#What#are#the#effects#of#
obesity?####(5#steps)#
D. What#is#the#best#way#to#get#a#girlfriend/boyfriend?#What#is#the#process?###(5#steps)#

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Editing and Grammar PracticeName:!

2A

Class:!

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Unit Focus Chart
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1A!

1B!

2A!

2B!

Punctuation.!
Run"on#sentences.!
Sentence&fragments.!
Missing&Words.!
Singular/plural!nouns.!
Quantifier*+*s/es.!
Subject"verb%agreement.!
Word%choice.!
Word%form.%!
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Pronoun&agreement.!
Verb%tense%(simple%past,%
present,(future)!
Prepositions*(location*/transportation).!

Misplaced*commas.!
Independent!
/dependent'clauses.!
Comma%splices.!
Irregular(plural(nouns.!
Common%mistakes%
with%nouns.!
Word%choice.%%!
Word%form.%%!
Articles)(a,)an,)the)!
Verb%tense%(present'vs.'
present'continuous).!

Commas.!
“Because.”*!
Contractions.!
Sentence&fragments.!
Irregular(singular(and(plural&nouns.!
Subject"verb%agreement.!
Word%choice.!
Word%form.!
Word%order.!
Pronoun&agreement.!
Articles)(a,)an,)the).!

Commas.!
“Because.”*!
Contractions.!
Sentence&fragments.!
Singular/plural+nouns.!
Subject"verb%agreement.!

Review&of&all&editing&symbols.!

Verb%tense%(irregular).!
Prepositions*(time).!

Review&of&all&editing&symbols.!

Unit!

1!
2!
3!
4!
5!

Word%choice.!
Word%form.!
Infinitives)vs.)Gerunds!
Verb%tense%(passive).!
Irregular(verb(forms.!

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Correction Symbols
SYMBOLMEANINGSYMBOLMEANINGp!

punctuation!

wf!

wrong&form!

Λ!

missing&word!

ww!

wrong&word!

cap!

capitalization!

wo!

wrong&word&order!

vt!

verb%tense!

prep!

preposition!

s/v!

subject"verb%agreement!

art!

article!

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sp!

combine!

pron!

pronoun&agreement!

spelling!

con!

connector!

s/pl!

singular)or)plural!

rep!

repetition!

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unnecessary)word!

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I"don’t"understand!!

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previous)sentence!

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paragraph!

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Unit 1!!

Editing and Grammar Practice

2A

FOCUS:! commas,'“because,”'contractions,'sentence'fragments!

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A.##Sentence&Activity!
Correct'the'sentences'below.''Underline!and$place%correction%symbols%above!each%mistake.!!
Use$the$correction$symbols$in$the$box$to$the$right.$$Symbols$may$be$used$more$than$once.!
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1.##My#father#brother,!and$sister$came$to$watch$my$baseball$game!(2!mistakes)!

p cap

2.##I#love#science.##Because!it#is#interesting.))(2!mistakes)!
3.##Because&I&disobeyed&my&mom&I&cant"go"to"the"summer"festival"on"Saturday.!!(2!mistakes)!
4.##First&Harry%Potter%is%my%favorite%character,%because%he%has%magical%powers.!!(2!mistakes)!
5.##snakes&and&turtles&are&both&reptiles&but&only&turtles&have&legs.&&(2!mistakes)!!
6.##I#often#go#to#karaoke,#but#never#when%its%a%school&night.&&(2!mistakes)!

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B.##Paragraph#Editing!!(12!mistakes)!
Correct'the'paragraph'below.''First,'underline!and$place&correction&symbols&above&the&mistakes,)then)rewrite)the)paragraph)to)correct)any)mistakes.!!Use$the$correction$symbols$
in#the#box#to#the#right.##Symbols#may#be#used#more#than#once.!

p sp cap!
Well, its another rainy day. First, I think I will take a walk around the neyborhood
to stretch my legs. Second I will cook a big breakfast with toast eggs and bacon. After
that, I might mow my lawn, because the grass is getting pretty long. Next, maybe I willvisit my grand mother. I think she wants me to go grocery shoping with her. I will ask
my brother to come with us but I doubt he will go. Because he doesnt like going to thegrocery store as much as I do.
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Unit 2

Editing and Grammar Practice

2A

FOCUS:! Irregular(singular/plural*nouns,*subject"verb%agreement!

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A.##Sentence#Activity!
Correct'the'sentences'below.''Fill'in'the'blanks'with'the'singular)or)plural!nouns%and$the$correct$verb$agreement.!

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1.##Please&hand&me&two&forks&and&two&_____________________.&&(knife)!!
2.##Two!_____________________"is"a"long"time"to"live"in"another"___________________________.""(year,"country)!
3.##We#need#to#walk#a#few#_________________________#to#get#to#the#train#station.##(kilometer)!
4.##My#family#_______________________#near#the#beach#in#Miyazaki.#!(live)!
5.##The$_____________________$of$Germany$_______________________"very"friendly."!(person,)be!verb)!
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B.##Paragraph#Editing##(11!mistakes)!
Correct'the'paragraph'below.''First,'underline!and$place&correction&symbols&
above&the&mistakes,&then&rewrite&the&paragraph&to&correct&any$mistakes.$$
Use$the$correction$symbols$in$the$box$to$the$right.$$Symbols$may$be$used$
more%than%once.!
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p s/v s/pl sp

My girlfriend had a terrible cold for several day. She blew her nose sneezed, andcoughed. Yesterday, I made her chicken soup, and told her to drink orange juice. Because
they is good for a cold. After that, she went to the docter. There were many persons in
the waiting room, but we could see the doctor quickly. The doctor gave her somemedicines, and she has been in bed since then. Today, she is feeling much better. She
was even able to visit the park for two hour. I really hope she doesn’t get sick again
soon. We is very tired of the sneezing and coughing.!
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Unit 3

2A

Editing and Grammar Practice

FOCUS:! Word%choice,%word%form,&word&order!

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A.##Sentence#Activity!
Correct'the'sentences'below.''Choose'the'correct'words&to&complete&the&sentences.!

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1.##I#am#("interested"/"interesting")!in#the#("exited&/&exciting&)!rides&at&Universal&Studios.!
2.!!As#the#(entered'children)/"children)entered)),"the"room"was"filled"with"("happy"/"happiness").""!
3.##The$("scary"/"scared")!part%of%the%story%really%("scary"/"scared!)!the$children$in$library.!
4.##As#the#temperature#("rows"/"rose"/"roze"),"the"amount"of"snow"also!("decreased"/"increased%).!
5.##I"often"buy"("close"/"clothes")"at#the#mall#because#it!is!("convenient"/"useful").!
!

B.##Paragraph#Editing##(13!mistakes)!
Correct'the'paragraph'below.''First,'underline!and$place&correction&symbols&
above&the$mistakes,$then$rewrite$the$paragraph$to$correct$any$mistakes.$$Use$the$correction(symbols(in(the(box(to(the(right.((Symbols(may(be(used(more(than(once.!
!
!

wo ww wf cap
s/v s/plsp!

If you want to have an amazed time at Disney World, I will give you some advices.
First, you should arrive as early as possible. You want to have much as time in the park
as you can because there are many interested rides and things to do, For example, Space
Mountain, the monorail, and the merry-go-round. Number too, you should go to the most
exciting attractions first. That is because they is the most populer, and many persons
will be in line. It is very convenient to make a list. Last, make sure you meet the Disneycharacters. You will forget never your time, if you have a piksure with Mickey Mouse. I
hope you enjoy your visit.!
!
!

______________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________!

4!

Unit 4

2A

Editing and Grammar Practice

FOCUS:! Pronoun&agreement,&articles&(a,&an,&the)!

!
!!
!!!

A.##Sentence#Activity!
Correct'the'sentences'below.''Choose'the'correct'pronoun'or'article'to'complete'the'sentence.!

!
1.##My#mother#cooks#dinner#three#nights#a#week.##("She"/"Her"/"His")!best%dish%is%chicken%nanban.!
2.##Next,#you#will#see#("a"/"an")!large&tree.&&When&you&arrive&at&("a"/"the"/"none!)!tree,%turn%left.!
3.##Mr.#Ayano#loves#("he"/"him"/"his")"two$dogs.$$(His%/!They%/%Their%)!names&are&Pochi&and&Koro.!
4.##The#audience#had#("a"/"an"/"none!)!hour%before%the%concert.%%%So,%("it"/"they%)"all#went#to#eat#first.!
5.##Ms.$Ann$told$me$to$put$("her"/"some"/"the")!boxes&by&the&door.&&("She"/"He")"said%("it"/"they")!are$heavy.!

!!
B.##Paragraph#Editing##(12$mistakes)!
Correct'the'paragraph'below.''First,'underline!and$place$correction$
symbols'above'the'mistakes,'then'rewrite'the'paragraph'to'correct'any'
mistakes.))Use)the)correction)symbols)in)the)box)to)the)right.))Symbols)may)be#used#more#than#once.!
!
!

art

ww

wf

s/v

pron

Λ

s/pl

x

s/pl

sp

My best friends are Hiro and Ayaka. This does not mean that them are alike. In
fact, they is very different. One difference is their personality. For example, Hiro is very
funny, while Ayaka is more serious. Another difference is there hobbies. Hiro loves sing,and Ayaka loves a video games. Hiro and me often go to karaoke together, while Ayaka andhe often spend time at game center. Even though Hiro and Ayaka are different, them havebig similarity. That is, they both love scared movies. The three of us often watch
horror movies together.!
!
!

______________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________!

5!

Unit 5

2A

Editing and Grammar Practice

FOCUS:! Verb%tense%(irregular!forms),(prepositions((time)!

!
A.##Sentence#Activity!
Correct'the'sentences'below.''Choose&the!correct&verb&or&preposition&to&complete&the&sentences.!

!
1.##I"want"to"have"the"party"("in"/"on"/"at")!May,%but%I%am%busy%("in"/"on"/"at")!May$5th."!
2.##My#sister#was#born#("in"/"on"/"at")!June%13,%1995.%%I%was%born%ten%years%later%("in"/"on"/"at")!2005.!
3.##Last%week,"my"bus"(!leaved!/"left"/)!("in"/"on"/"at")!12:30&("in"/"on"/"at")"Friday.!
4.##Lisa%has%not%("ride"/"rode"/"ridden")!a"horse"before,"but"her"son!("ride"/"rode"/"ridden")!yesterday.!
5.##I"("buyed"/"bought"/"have"bought")!flowers(two(days(ago,(but(now(they(are(("died"/"dead"/"dying").!

!!
B.##Paragraph#Editing##(13!mistakes)!
Correct'the'paragraph'below.''First,'underline!and$place$correction$symbols$
above&the&mistakes,&then&rewrite&the&paragraph&to&correct&any&mistakes.&&Use&the&correction(symbols(in(the(box(to(the(right.((Symbols(may(be(used(more(than(once.!
!
!

prep vt Λ x
pron

wf
s/pl

art
sp

It is always a good idea to plan a vacation before you go. At April I will go to
California next month. My airplane left Tokyo at midnight in April 2nd, and it will arrive in
San Francisco on noon the next day. The first day of my trip, I planning to visit a San
Francisco Bay Aquarium. On the afternoon of the second day, my plan is to go skydiving.
That night, I want to made a reservation on seven o’clock at the Old Bay Restaurant. At
the last day of the trip, I took a cruise around the Bay. I’m sure they will be beautiful.
With careful planning, I thought my vacation will be great.!
!
!

______________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________!
!
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6!

!
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2B#

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Kwansei Gakuin University
Department of Science and Technology
Instructor: Matthew Barbee!

#Name:Class:!
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Correction Symbols!
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Matthew#Barbee,#Kwansei#Gakuin,#2014#

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Name:!______________________________________________!!

Class:__________________!

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Matthew#Barbee,#Kwansei#Gakuin,#2014#

Rew rite #1##_____________________________________________T itL eWord#Count:#!

Matthew#Barbee,#Kwansei#Gakuin,#2014#

WRITING!2B!

Writing
Portfolio!
Portfolio Entry #1!

(100 words)#
Choose&one&topic&and&write&about&it.&Be&sure&to&use&complete&sentences&and&use&paragraph&style.&#

A. What#did#you#do#over#summer#break?##Where#did#you#go?##Who#did#you#go#with?##What#was#the## best#and#worst#part#of#your#summer#break?#B. # What#do#you#wish#you#did#over#summer#break?#What#plans#would#have#made#if#you#could#have## done#anything?##Where#would#you#have#gone?##Who#would#you#have#gone#with?#
C. # Is#it#better#for#university#students#to#work#during#the#summer#or#have#a#lot#free#time?#

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Matthew#Barbee,#Kwansei#Gakuin,#2014#

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Matthew#Barbee,#Kwansei#Gakuin,#2014#

Portfolio Entry #2(150 words)

A. How#does#your#college#life#differ#from#high#school?##Write#about#similarities#and#differences#
between#the#two.#
B. Modern#smart#phones#became#popular#in#2007#with#the#introduction#of#the#iPhone.#How#
does#today’s#world#with#smart#phones#differ#from#the#world#in#2006,#when#most#people#only#
had#feature#phones#(gara:kei)?##C. Even#though#they#are#both#part#of#the#same#country,#Osaka#and#Tokyo#have#distinct#features.##
What#are#some#similarities#and#differences#between#Osaka#and#Tokyo?#

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Matthew#Barbee,#Kwansei#Gakuin,#2014#

Portfolio Entry #3(150-200 words)#
A.##Declining#birth#rate#in#Japan#is#causing#many#problems.##What#are#the#problems#that#are#caused?##What#can#Japan#do#to#solve#the#problems?##(Give#three#problems,#and#write#about#how#to#fix#each##problem.)##
B.##If#Japan#allowed#more#immigrants#to#come#into#the#country,#what#would#be#some#of#the#social##
benefits#and#problems#that#might#cause?###(Give#two#positive#effects#and#two#negative#effects.)#
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Matthew#Barbee,#Kwansei#Gakuin,#2014#

Portfolio Entry #4###(100 Words)

A. Japanese#universities#begin#in#April#and#end#in#January.##In#almost#every#other#country#in#the#world,#university#begins#in#September#and#ends#in#May.##Do#you#think#
Japan#should#convert#to#the#Western#university#calendar?#Why#or#why#not?#B. All#Japanese#university#students#must#study#abroad#for#a#year.##Do#you#agree#or#
disagree?##Give#three#reasons#for#your#opinion.#

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Portfolio Entry #5(100 words)##FREEWRITING!!

Matthew#Barbee,#Kwansei#Gakuin,#2014#

Peer Edited by#___________________

Rew rite #6##_____________________________________________
Tit LeWord#Count:#

Matthew#Barbee,#Kwansei#Gakuin,#2014#

Portfolio Entry #6(150 words)

A.##Are#women#treated#the#same#as#men#in#Japan?##Why#do/don’t#you#think#so?#B.##If#a#woman#gets#a#really#good#job,#is#it#okay#for#her#to#work#while#the#husband#stays#at#home#and#takes#care#of#the#children?##Why#or#why#not?#
C.##Now,#the#majority#of#government#leaders#is#overwhelmingly#male.##Do#you#
think#this#should#change?##What#do#you#think#would#happen#if#women#ruled#
the#world?#

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Matthew#Barbee,#Kwansei#Gakuin,#2014#

Portfolio Entry #7
Describe#an#element#of#Japanese#culture#that#is#“hidden”#or#“unknown”#to#most#foreigners.##
Write#a#paragraph#teaching#a#foreigner#about#a#secret#part#of#Japanese#culture.#

Peer Edited by#___________________##

Portfolio Entry #8(100 words)

Peer Edited by#___________________#

FREEWRITING!!

Matthew#Barbee,#Kwansei#Gakuin,#2014#

Rew rite #9##_____________________________________________
Tit LeWord#Count:#

Matthew#Barbee,#Kwansei#Gakuin,#2014#

Portfolio Entry #9(200 words)

Choose(one(of(the(following(topics.((Use(it(as(your(first(sentence.((Write(three(to(four(paragraphs.(#
Global#warming#is#caused#by#many#different#things.#.#.##
There#are#a#number#of#consequences#of#global#warming.#.#.##
Several#things#have#contributed#to#my#success#as#a#student.#.#.##
Moving#to#a#big#city#has#changed#my#life#in#many#ways.#.#.#

Matthew#Barbee,#Kwansei#Gakuin,#2014#

Peer Edited by#___________________#

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C.
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Rew rite #10##_____________________________________________
Tit LeWord#Count:#

Matthew#Barbee,#Kwansei#Gakuin,#2014#

Portfolio Entry #10(150 words)

A. Think#about#your#first#two#years#at#Kwansei#Gakuin.##Reflect#on#your#experiences#as#a#
student.##Did#you#have#fun?##Did#you#succeed?##Did#you#find#your#path#to#the#future?##Write#
about#some#positive#experiences#and#some#negative#experiences#you#have#had#a#KG.##Last,#
if#you#could#start#again#as#a#freshman,#would#you#change#anything#about#your#university#
life?##(Write(at(least(three(paragraphs(with(an(introduction.)#B. If#you#were#the#President#of#Kwansei#Gakuin#University,#what#changes#would#you#make#to#
the#school?##Be#creative.##Imagine#that#you#had#the#power#and#money#to#make#a#real#change.##Give#at#least#three#examples#of#what#you#would#change#and#why.#(Write(at(least(three(paragraphs(with(an(introduction.)#

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Editing and Grammar PracticeName:!

2B

Class:!

!

!!
Unit Focus Chart
!

Unit!

1!
2!
3!
4!
5!

1A!

1B!

2A!

2B!

Punctuation.!
Run"on#sentences.!
Sentence&fragments.!
Missing&Words.!
Singular/plural+nouns.!
Quantifier*+*s/es.!
Subject"verb%
agreement.!
Word%choice.!
Word%form.%!
!
Pronoun&agreement.!
Verb%tense%(simple%past,%
present,(future)!
Prepositions*(location*/transportation).!

Misplaced*commas.!
Independent'/dependent'clauses.!
Comma%splices.!
Irregular(plural(nouns.!
Common%mistakes%with%nouns.!

Commas.!
“Because.”*!
Contractions.!
Sentence&fragments.!
Singular/plural+nouns.!
Subject"verb%
agreement.!

Word%choice.%%!
Word%form.%%!
Articles)(a,)an,)the)!
Verb%tense%(present%vs.%present'continuous).!

Commas.!
“Because.”*!
Contractions.!
Sentence&fragments.!
Irregular(singular(and(plural&nouns.!
Subject"verb%
agreement.!
Word%choice.!
Word%form.!
Word%order.!
Pronoun&agreement.!
Articles)(a,)an,)the).!

Review&of&all&editing&symbols.!

Verb%tense%(irregular).!
Prepositions*(time).!

Review&of&all&editing&symbols.!

Word%choice.!
Word%form.!
Infinitives)vs.)Gerunds!
Verb%tense%(passive).!
Irregular(verb(forms.!

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Correction Symbols
SYMBOL

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MEANINGSYMBOLMEANINGp!

punctuation!

wf!

wrong&form!

Λ!

missing&word!

ww!

wrong&word!

cap!

capitalization!

wo!

wrong&word&order!

vt!

verb%tense!

prep!

preposition!

s/v!

subject"verb%agreement!

art!

article!

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sp!

combine!

pron!

pronoun&agreement!

spelling!

con!

connector!

s/pl!

singular)or)plural!

rep!

repetition!

X!

unnecessary)word!

?!

I"don’t"understand!!

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Indent&paragraph!

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Connect'to'
previous)sentence!

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Start%new$
paragraph!

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7!

Unit 1

Editing and Grammar Practice

2B

FOCUS:! commas,'“because,”'contractions,'sentence'fragments!

!
!

A.##Sentence#Activity!
Correct'the'sentences'below.''Underline!and$place$correction$symbols$above$each$mistake.$$
Use$the$correction$symbols$in$the$box$to$the$right.$$Symbols$may$be$used$more$than$once.!

p cap

!
1.##Its#not#polite#to#eat#with#your#mouth#open.##(1#mistake)!
2.##Because#it’s#a#holiday,#she#will#go#to#the#bakery#get$a$haircut$and$go$to$the$park.$$(2#mistakes)!
3.##The#dog#played#with#it’s#toys#all#morning.##For#example,#a#ball#and#a#rope.##(3#mistakes)!
4.##I#often#like#to#read#at#a#café.##Because#its#quiet#and#the#atmosphere#is#comfortable.##(4#mistakes)!
5.##Second#Asuka#loves#to#go#to#the#park#because#she#can#run#free,#and#play#on#the#swing#set.##(2#mistakes)!!

!
B.##Paragraph#Editing##(10$mistakes)!
Correct'the'paragraph'below.''First,'underline!and$place$correction$symbols$above$the$mistakes,)then)rewrite)the)paragraph)to)correct)any)mistakes.))Use)the)correction)
symbols'in'the'box'to'the'right.''Symbols'may'be'used'more'than'once.!

p cap sp

Daisuke has been applying for full–time jobs in Osaka, and Kyoto. Last week, hereceived a call from a computer company in tokyo. They asked Daisuke to fry to Tokyo
for a job interview. Daisuke agreed to go to the interview. Because the company offeredto pay for Daisuke’s airplane ticket. Since then, Daisuke has been busy collecting
informaton about the company. Next he also went shopping for a new suite. Also,
Daisuke has been rehearsing for the interview, because he wants to do his best, impress
the company and get a job. Hes looking forward to working at a new place.
!
!

______________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________!

!!

8!

Unit 2

Editing and Grammar Practice

2B

FOCUS:! Singular/plural+nouns,+subject"verb%agreement!

!
!

A.##Sentence#Activity!
Correct'the'sentences'below.''Fill'in'the'blanks'with'the'singular'or'plural'nouns'and'the'correct'verb'agreement.!

!
1.##The#animals#("was"/"were")!taken&to&the&farm&in&two&("vehicle"/"vehicles").!
2.##In#the#summer,#I#love#eating#("fruit"/"fruits"),"but"in"the"winter"I"prefer"("vegetable"/"vegetables").!
3.##I#must#win#two#(match'/'matches')'before&I&can&get&a&trophy.&!
4.##Three#years#("is"/"are")"a"long$time$to$not$buy$new$(cloths(/(clothes().!
5.##She!("like"/"likes")"Aoto$and$Mari.$$They$are$very$generous$("person"/"persons"/"people").!
!

B.##Paragraph#Editing##(12$mistakes)!
Correct'the'paragraph'below.''First,!underline!and$place$correction$
symbols'above'the'mistakes,'then'rewrite'the'paragraph'to'correct'
any$mistakes.$$Use$the$correction$symbols$in$the$box$to$the$right.$$
Symbols(may(be(used(more(than(once.!
!

s/v s/pl sp p cap

Since I was a little girl, I have always loved science-fiction movie. There areseveral reason that I likes them. First I have always been interested in the future. I
love to imagine what the future will be like. Will it be a wonderful utopia or a nightmare
filled with scary alien? My second reason is, because I love technologies. Sci-fi is fullof robots, spaceships, and computer. Finally, I think sci-fi is great because it is full of
imagination. Of course, all movies and TV shows is creative. But I love seeing lives andworlds that only ekzist in the imagination. To me, science-fiction is the best movie genre.!!
!

!
!

______________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________!

9!

Unit 3

2B

Editing and Grammar Practice

FOCUS:! Word%choice,%word%form,%infinitives,%and%gerunds!

!

A.##Sentence#Activity!
Correct'the'sentences'below.''Choose'the'correct'words'to'complete'the'sentences'OR'correct'the'underlined'words.!

!

1.##I#like#to#walking!in#the#park#because#it#helps#me#clear#my#mind.##(#_____________________#)!
2.##The#("scary"/"scared")!part%of%the%ride%("scary"/"scared")!all#the#children#at#the#party.!
3.##My#friends#and#I#love#ride!the$roller$coasters$at$the$theme$park.$$($_____________________$)!
4.##The#students#were#("exited"/"exciting")"about&the&("interested"/"interesting")!events&at&the&festival.!
5.##Eat!onions,&to#watching!scary&movies,&and&bugs&are&the&things&I&hate.&&(&________________"/"_________________")!
!!

ww

B.##Paragraph#Editing##(10$mistakes)!
Correct'the'paragraph'below.''First,'underline!and$place$correction$symbols$
above&the&mistakes,&then&rewrite&the&paragraph&to&correct&any&mistakes.&&Use&the&correction(symbols(in(the(box(to(the(right.((Symbols(may(be(used(more(than(once.!
!
!!

Λ

wf

s/pl

p
sp x

!

I have travelled to many interested countries around the world. While all of them

are exciting to visit, I have three favorite country. The first country, is Thailand. It is
one of my favorites because of the beaches and the mountains. I like to swimming at
the beach and ride elephants in the mountains. Besides Thailand I also like India. The
food in India is my favorite cuisine. Everything is dericious, for example, the curries, thebreads, and the yogurt lassies. Last, I love go to Jordan. Besides the nature and thefood, I am amazing at the landmarks and the desserts. Petra is my favorite World
Heritage Site. That is why I love Thailand, India, and Jordan.!
!
!

______________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________!

10!

Unit 4

Editing and Grammar Practice

2B

FOCUS:! Verb%tense%(passive),%irregular%verb%forms!

!!
!

A.##Sentence#Activity!
Correct'the'sentences'below.''Write'the'correct'form'of'the'verb'in'the!blanks'to'complete'the'sentences.!

!

1.""The"house"_________"""_______________"100!years&ago.&&! !

!

!

!

2.""After"all"the"goals"____________"""_________________,"the"game"was"___________________.""!

!

(build)!

!

(miss,&lose)!

3.##Hundreds#of#languages#___________###___________________"at"the"United"Nations"every"day.""!

(speak)!

4.""You"can’t"enter"now;"the"office"_________"""______________"""_________________"at"the"moment.""!

(clean)!

5.##Don’t#worry#about#the#money,#the#car#_________###______________###_________________"now.""!

(sell)!

6.""My"favorite"coffee"cup"___________"""_________________"by"the"dog"yesterday.""!

(broke)!

!

!

!
!!!

B.##Paragraph#Editing##(11#mistakes)!
Correct'the'paragraph'below.''First,'underline!and$place$correction$symbols$
above&the&mistakes,&then&rewrite&the&paragraph&to&correct&any&mistakes.&&Use&the&correction(symbols(in(the(box(to(the(right.((Symbols(may(be(used(more(than(once.!
!
!

vt

Λ wf conx pron s/pl art
s/pl

sp

The best experience of my life happen last summer. For three months, I studied
abroad in Florida, U.S.A. I really had a great time in Florida, I did many amazed things.
One of the thing I did was to swimming with dolphins. It was very cute. Next, I reallyenjoyed my host family. A family consisted of a father, a mother, and two twin girls. My
breakfast and dinner maked everyday by father. Everyone were so kind. Another goodexperience was seeing the original Florida State Capitol Building. It was build in 1845.
Overall, I had a great time in Florida.!
!
!

______________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________!
11!

Unit 5

Editing and Grammar Practice

2B

FOCUS:! Review&of&all&the&symbols!

!
!!

Correct'the'paragraphs'below.''First,'underline!and$place$correction(symbols(above(the(mistakes,(then(correct(the(mistakes.))Use)any)of)the)correction)symbols)in)the)box)to)the$right.$$Some$symbols$may$be$used$more$than$once$or$
not$at$all.!

p Λ caps/pl x wf
art
pron

vt
s/v
sp
ww wo prep
con rep!
A.##Paragraph#1##(15$mistakes)!
!!
!

My trip to the United States were big shock. One day, my mother said, “Go andpack your cloths. We are going to New York tomorrow, and they are going to live there.”
The news was a complete surprise to me. I went to my room and sit on the bed for along time. After that I called my best friend and telled him a news. The next morning, mymother and I got on a airplane in eight 0’clock. I remember sitting next to the window,
and looking down on my City. I was scared. Because I didn’t know my future. My life
charged overnight. I never forget that trip.
!

B.##Paragraph#2##(14$mistakes)!
!!
!

In my opinion, violent video games is harmful to young children. First studies
show that playing these games cause changes in the behavior of young people. According
to researchers, playing these games after, young people have more more angry feelings. In
addition, players get into fights at school. Players have arguments with they teachers.
_ Second reason is that violent video games make young people less sensitive too violencein the world. I beleive that games make it entertaining to shoot and kill. Childs may
forget the line between fantasy and reality. Lastly, these types of games teach childrenthat it is ok to use vilence to solve their problem. Violence is never the solution.
Therefore, violent games are not for young people, and it should be banned.
12!