THE EA CONNECTION: SEPTEMBER 2019
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EA TOOLS FOR RECOVERY
Step 9: Made direct amends to such people wherever possible, except when to do so would injure them orothers.
Tradition 9: EA, as such, ought never be organized; but we may create service boards or committees directly
responsible to those they serve.
Slogan 9: This too shall pass.
Promise 9: Our relationships with other people improve.
Just for Today 9: I will have a quiet time of meditation wherein I shall think of my Higher Power, of myself, andof my neighbor. I shall relax and seek truth.
Helpful Concept 9: We utilize the program—we do not analyze it. Understanding comes with experience. Eachday we apply some part of the program to our personal lives.

FROM YOUR EA BOARD OF TRUSTEESDid you know the EAI office periodically sends information out via email? Whether you are a group contact or simply
want to receive the information yourself, consider signing up to be included in the email list. We currently have morethan 2,000 people who receive EAI information this way. Examples of information send out include: retreats or conference announcements, new literature or merchandise information, or news about the office or trustee activities. You
must request to be added by going to https://emotionsanonymous.org/get-involved/email-sign-up.html. We encourage all groups to have at least one person receiving email information in this manner.

Annual Meeting
Please mark your calendars for the Annual Membership Meeting to be held on September 14 at Salem Lutheran
Church in West St. Paul at 11 a.m. CT. If you can not attend in person you may call in to participate. Information wasemailed out to group contacts and is available on the website.

Your Gift
It is the gift that keeps on giving to be able to attend Emotions Anonymous meetings where people regularly show up
and support one another. Many people across the country don't have the chance to experience this gift, as available
EA meetings are too far for them to economically attend regularly. If you are so inclined, consider starting an EA
meeting where you live in service to those in your community, enabling more people to experience the serenity thatthe program facilitates. It's simpler than you might imagine and could be very rewarding. Contact the main office if you
are interested at groupdata@emotionsanonymous.org

www.EmotionsAnonymous.org
Box 4245 St Paul, MN 55104
Phone 651-647-9712
Hours Mon—Thurs: 10 to 3:00 CST

director@emotionsanonymous.org
editor@emotionsanonymous.org
groupdata@emotionsanonymous.org
orders@emotionsanonymous.org
shipping@emotionsanonymous.org

Special Gifts and Memorials
In loving memory of Manfred H, Germany
A longtime member and faithful servant of EA

RECOVERY USING THE TOOLS OF EAStep 9: Made direct amendsto such people wherever
possible, except when to doso would injure them orothers.
“We realize this amends process ismore about forgiving ourselves
than about receiving forgivenessfrom others.” EA Book, p.69
I reflect on making amends, I recall what someone tried to teachme a long time ago.
This person said that what God
wants more than anything else isfor me to be happy. God wants toplease me, to take care of me, towatch over me, to help me. And
that what makes God sad is when
we turn our backs on Him.
Needless to say, I was in no shape
to hear this—much less embrace
it. I was deep in a “If God is sogreat, why am I and so many others so very unhappy?”
Today, I am more open to considering whether or not this is true. I
still don’t understand it or believeit, but I think about it a lot. I pray
for the ability to feel and experience this in my life.
I also reflect that, if this is true,
then I need to make amends toGod for shunning Him for years.
Labeling me “The Prodigal Son”
would be an understatement. I am
more like the fallen angel.
In some ways, I so very much want
the opportunity to make amends
to God—for that would mean His
love for me is vast and their forme...Chris

Step Nine introduced me to theconcept of making amends. The
person I needed to make the mostamends to was myself. This step
was a beginning of a process
where I ever so gradually changed
my thinking from negative to positive.
This work helped me to have a lot
more self-esteem. Although myemotions can still be quite strong, I
can wait them out. I know they'llcalm down, and I don't need totake any action.
The more consistently I work thesteps, the healthier my thought,
actions, and life become...CarolI am inspired by those who havewalked through the steps in order.
I've been resisting Steps 6 through9 for years, just flirting with them.
So I'm going to take another lookand have a little think. Right here,
right now—since here is where I
do my most sincere "work."
Since I blubbered my way througha Step 5 almost 20 years ago, I've
sat on my laurels. And yet somevery remarkable things did happen. Some very serious defects ofcharacter simply disappeared.
Over the years clarity (thanks toprogram) has illuminated new"defects.”
The first person on my list of those
I had harmed ended up being me. I
held myself accountable and responsible for all the things that
had occurred in my life from themoment my parents began
fighting in front of me as a toddler.
I was the broken one who had tomake amends and clean up my act

by being what others wanted me
to be. Because of this I have had todo so much the dynamics of family
and what I needed to do to movebeyond the feelings of betrayal,falsehoods and expectations. I
needed to learn to be independentof their judgement and not sabotage my success. That work is stillongoing. It makes me laugh because what is, IS, and I'm sixty
now, so although I'm still game totry many new things. I doubt I will
become the musical sensation I
dreamed I'd be, or the actress orthe artist. I will NOT say never but
I'm thinking that fantasy is just oneof my diversions.
I haven't put anyone else on that
list, but I believe now I am ready to
see the faces of those I've hurt andbecome willing to make amends.
I'm open, God. I'm saying it here in
front of my friends in EA. I'm at thevery least willing to ask for Your
help in seeing the "rest" of theequation. Finally, I think I'm readyto serve and become teachable atthe same time. There it is and I will
put a hearty AMEN at the end ofthis, right here. Thanks everybody
for being my witness…MLSlogan 9: This too shall pass.
What a blessing this has been overthe years. What gives me pause
today will disappear one of my tomorrows. It always works! Theclouds go away and the sun begins
to shine.
Thank you, God.
...CarrieDISCOVERING THE TOOLS OF EA
HALTWhen I first came to EA I had a lot of problems with anger. I couldn't see it coming, so I had to learn to deal with
it when it erupted. If I could write, the physical act of writing helped to dissipate the adrenaline and eventually I
could start to figure out what had triggered the anger.
If I couldn't write, I tried to talk to someone in program. If I couldn't do those things I tried to do some vigorous
work/chores or go for a walk to discharge the energy of my anger. I found it helpful to physically move awayfrom the person or situation that triggered my anger. Sometimes I played loud, angry rock music. I could tellwhen I was calming down because I would eventually want to play quieter, more peaceful music.
Later, as I got better at recognizing what I was feeling, it helped when I could identify the underlying source of myanger. Once I realized that I was really afraid of failure, looking stupid or any of many other fears, my anger
would lessen and eventually disappear. In my experience, naming my underlying emotions seems to cut myproblems in half.
Eventually I learned how to use HALTs to be aware that when I am Hungry, Angry, Lonely, or Tired. I need to slow
down, be careful and take care of myself or I am likely to have a slip...JoeAnger
Meditation for Today: Because I am so uncomfortable with my anger, help me to be honest when it is present,or else it will build up and snowball into self-defeating behavior...Today Book, July 24
This is so true of me. I can clearly recall that I was so frozen with fear and shame when I first entered counseling
25 years ago that did not want to talk about my anger for fear of it erupting again as it had in a serious way a
short time earlier.
I have had to experience a gradual thawing out of my fear and I am still troubled by my anger. I have requested abook from my local library that seems to address anger in a way that might help me.
In the meantime I give my anger and my resentment (which is a whole other matter) to my HP. He has truly
helped me there...JimSecret Anger
One of the secrets I've kept for most my life is that I've been angry about one thing or another for as long as I canremember. Whether it was about feeling like my parents expected too much of me or didn't think what I
accomplished was enough, or how my wife treated me long ago when we both didn't understand that I had someemotional issues I've been angry, resentful and unhappy.
In my family we were not allowed to express our emotions especially the angry ones, so things got bottled up.
I've always believed that anger turned inward can develop into depression, which I've also had for most my life.
The fact is I just recently realized that this anger was not a part of my character that I had to accept because it
was part of my make-up. It was just an emotion that I could let go of if I was willing to surrender it to my HP.
The surrender of my anger released all this energy that I had directed inward for so long. I had forgotten how toenjoy life.
I feel like there is this other person I could become just in my peripheral vision. This "could be" person wants todance and shout and jump for joy expressing all this trapped energy in an outward display that I've been fearfulof all the days of my life. Perhaps one day soon I'll step into the skin of this "could be" person and become what I
believe is possible as I continue to work the EA program that works for me, accept myfaults and defects, and humbly ask God to remove them. This new person I become
won't be perfect, but will be free of the secret anger that has consumed me all theseanguished years. Let me start right now...Anonymous

2019 - 2020 EA Board of Trustees
Please feel free to contact members of the Board with questions or concerns
Minutes of the Board of Trustees Meeting can be viewed here.

Scott J, MN 507-276-0323 sdjakel@gmail.com President
John W, MN 612-760-0313 johnwerner52@gmail.com Vice President
Colleen C, MN 651-245-5461 coyne2003@hotmail.com Secretary
Derita P, OH 216-624-3559 deritapippen@gmail.com Treasurer
Paul N, NJ 201-264-1807 paul@nobleequity.com Trustee
Steve B, CA 909-438-4938 stevebell_28@yahoo.com Trustee

THE TWELVE TRADITIONS
The 12 Traditions are the guidelines by which our group and our fellowship function.
They have proven over the years to be an effective way of holding the fellowship and individual groups together.
Tradition 9: EA, as such, ought never be organized; but we may create service boards or committees
directly responsible to those they serve.
When we apply tradition 9 in our program, it shows up as groups create committees to manage things likehospitality and such. At the level of trustees, we create ad hoc committees like the currently forming bylaw review
committee and the upcoming communications committee to help EA be the best it can be at the level of workthrough the International Service Center, working with the trustees and executive director. I’m thankful for thefreedom to create committees/service boards empowered to serve and that they can respond to others about theirmanner of service – being directly responsible to them in this way...Scott J
Though our EA meetings may seem chaotic at times, chaos isn't the goal of tradition 9. What this tradition
encourages us to do is remain as free as possible from the bureaucracy which tends to form around organizations,taking on a life of its own and obscuring the real purpose of the group. Everything we do in EA is geared to ourprimary purpose of carrying our message of recovery to the person who still suffers from emotional problems.
We take direction from fellow members, emphasizing fellowship and group conscience rather than power andhierarchy when giving service. We practice rotation of leadership, and trust that our Higher Power is guiding us
through group conscience...Derita P
One of the core strengths of Emotions Anonymous is that while we have steps, traditions, just for todays and otherwell thought-out literature to serve as the foundation of our recovery in the program, there is not an organization
mandating what we must do to be emotionally well. We know that working the twelve steps is the soundest pathto emotional recovery and we do so at a pace that makes sense for us. While sponsorships and groups havesuggested guidelines, they are endowed with a great deal of autonomy, each working the program in the way thatworks best for them...Paul N
Tradition 9 reminds us that EA is not organized in the way that many other organizations are. We are a fellowshipwith no controlling hierarchy; no one outranks anyone else. EA does not bestow power on any individual or group.
There is no “boss” issuing orders, mandating specific behavior, or imposing rewards/punishments for achieving
required objectives. Our EA principles are suggested, not compulsory, and members of our fellowship decide forthemselves whether they will accept these suggestions. While we ask each other for support and guidance,
ultimately each of us must figure things out and follow through for ourselves in order to become wellemotionally...Steve B