THE EA CONNECTION: MARCH 2019Your monthly newsletter from ISC
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EA TOOLS FOR RECOVERY
Step 3: Made a decision to turn our will and our lives over to the care of God as we understood Him.
Tradition 3: The only requirement for EA membership is a desire to become well emotionally.
Slogan 3: One day at a time.
Promise 3: We comprehend the word serenity, and we know peace of mind.
Just for Today 3: I will try to adjust myself to what is and not force everything to adjust to my own desires.
I will accept my family, my friends, my business, my circumstances as they come.
Concept 3: We respect anonymity—no questions asked. We aim for an atmosphere of love and acceptance.
We do not care who you are or what you have done. You are welcome.

From your EA Board of Trustees: March Madness
In Emotions Anonymous we work as a team to recover from a seemingly hopeless state of mind. We are a fellowship, acommunity. People from all walks of life come to EA looking for a solution to their mental anguish. My life became unmanageable when I tried to do everything on my own. EA introduced me to a power greater than myself. Obviously I
needed something more powerful than me. I had no power to get out of the rut I was in. The harder I tried to change
things, the worse matters got. The people at the EA meetings were very nice. They listened to all of my problems. They
said I was the most important person in the room. I said to myself, “Really, you all really believe that about me.” Theybrought me in out of the cold world I believed I lived in. Thank you EA! Derita P.

Newcomer Orientation
As a newcomer to our meeting, we wish to extend a warm welcome to you. If this is your first 12-step meeting, we applaud
you for your courage. Every one of us attended a 12-step meeting for the first time, and we know it can be intimidating. Our
goal here is to ensure that this is a safe place for everyone to both share and listen. We find we can accomplish this by practicing the following principles:

I Language
It’s the language that’s spoken when sharing. Please avoid making “you” or “we” statements. Newcomers may find this difficult to do at first, but they usually find they can comfortably adapt to it after a few meetings. “I” language is used even when
expressing the obvious. Therefore, while a statement like, “We all need to take care of our bodies,” might be perceived as
lecturing, the problem is avoided if expressed as “I need to take care of my body.” We also use “I” language because recovery
involves taking responsibility for one’s own life and thoughts. Saying “you” or “we” is a way to avoid taking full responsibility.
EA’s Newcomer Orientation, available on our website: Item 27

www.EmotionsAnonymous.org
Box 4245, St Paul, MN 55104,Phone 651-647-9712
Hours Mon—Thurs: 10 to 3:30 CST

director@emotionsanonymous.org
editor@emotionsanonymous.org
groupdata@emotionsanonymous.org
orders@emotionsanonymous.org
shipping@emotionsanonymous.org

SPECIALS GIFTS AND MEMORIALSIn memory of Thomas S, he will be missed by all: Debra S , NJ
In memory of Leroy P, trusted servant:Anna H, TX - Karen P, Carrollton, TX - Laura B, Dallas, TX - Lila H, Esko, MNRECOVERY USING THE TOOLS OF EAStep 3: Made a decision toturn our will and ourlives over to the care of
God as we understood Him.
It has been over 20 years since I’ve
worked a step program. Having
worked the steps before, I know
they work. I have a memory of it,
but I have quite a few years oftroublesome habits built up whichbrings me to Step 3. I'm working on
it now and finding it much harderthan Step 1 and Step 2. Now thehard work begins. I read it over andover. "Made a decision to turn ourwill and our lives over to the care of
God as we understood Him." Whatthe heck does it mean? is my firstresponse.
The stumbling block may be my will.
I have been relying on my own
willpower for survival my entire
adult life. It's second nature. It feels
like "me." How do you just "hand itover?" Nothing to do but ask forhelp from my HP. So far this step forme is a conversation with myCreator. I don't know the specifics ofGod/Higher Power, but for me I
experience it as a mysterious

Understanding, I am handingthis to you—all this confusion,insanity, pain and shame. I do notknow how to let go of my will so can
you help me with that?” Somehow it
feels like I should be doing morehere but I keep on having this basic
conversation and prayer with myHP. I don't feel any different.
Nothing seems to happens, but I
know in time, not only will I let go,
but it will feel like I have...Linda

Here it is a Monday—back to work
day—and I had a wonderful day. Iwoke with no morning panic. It'samazing how things change when Ilive within my HP's will for me.
When I go against it, my body lets
me know through panic/anxiety.
And my thoughts also tell me that Iam NOT doing the next right thing. I
have been ignoring the thoughts
and the physical "hints" for way too
long. But now I am living within myHP's will for me and I am so muchhappier. As a very wise person in
my home group says, "It's easier todo the thing that looks the hardest”—one of EA's many paradoxes...Claire
Lately at the top of my "to do" list, Iwrite Step 3. I consciously turn mywill and life over to my loving Higher
Power (HP) before I even make mylist. This helps me know my HP is incharge of me and my plans. Whenthe day ends and I am seeing how
much was accomplished, I know andtrust my HP has been helping mewith it all.
I will continue this daily practice as I
feel comforted knowing my HP istruly with me in all that I am doing. I
love the saying "Surrender to Win",because in turning over my will andlife to HP (surrendering), I reallyhave been winning more at things
that matter the most to me. I amvery grateful for that. And even withdifficult times, I am given strength,
power and comfort from a Power
much greater than the difficulties
and I am able to endure and livewith unsolved problems with
serenity given to me from my HP.
So, Step 3 will continue to be thefirst item on my daily list for myemotional well-being, which not

only benefits me but others aroundme, especially those who endured
my emotional "un-wellness" before
EA. Grateful for recovery, one day ata time. Grateful to look for the goodin this day before me...ConniePromise 3: We comprehend
the word serenity, and weknow peace of mind.
A tall order in today’s world.
Serenity means to be serene. The
dictionary gives a number ofexamples of serene, two that I likeare “clear and free of storms orunpleasant change” and “markedby, or suggestive of, utter calm andunruffled repose or quietude.“ Withan unsettled world and a crazy mind
that runs from one issue to another,
I find this pretty impossible. That is
until I remember that I can find thatsense of serenity within myself.
When I sit and be quiet and let mymind go blank, there it is, serenity. Itis always there but I need to takethe time to just let it happen, even if
just for a few seconds to remind me
that it does exist.
Does this change the outside world?
No, but it does give me a minute topause and remember that there aretools to help me survive it. The mostfavorite of those would be theSerenity Prayer.
God, grant me the serenity
To accept the things I cannotchange, Courage to change thethings I can, And wisdom to know
the difference.
As I say it, it is important for me toremember that the only thing I canchange is me...KarenDISCOVERING THE TOOLS OF EAFocus
These past few months has been an unprecedented place of uncertainty for our family. I don't dismiss the feelings, butinstead of dwelling on my troubles, I meditate on my Higher Power's strength, power and love for me. The peace I
have gained by taking a few minutes each day for acceptance, has been immeasurable. Living in this one day and notpicking up all my problems at once has been a powerful practice. So has choosing to use one program tool at a time.
Focus is one of my character limitations. Prayer and meditation allow me to focus on the solution, not the problem.
There was a time I truly believed talking to God continuously about my problems was a form of both prayer and meditation. Yet, I didn't find the sense of tranquility I sought. It wasn't because I could not tune out distractions; actually, I
was too good at tuning out reality.
It helped me today to come across a reading in which a 12-step member found themselves running a stop sign, whilebeing so single focused on pleading with God, that they did not even hear the siren or see the flashing lights of the police car. I also read of a person who ruminated so much on his troubles that he "often didn't hear the solutions offeredat meetings." He shared his realization: that if he could not get himself to focus on recovery at the meeting, he was
not going to have the discipline to practice recovery work at home!
I can ask myself this. When I sit in a meeting and the preamble is happening, where is my mind? Do I have the habitof picking up my problems and thinking about them, instead of preparing myself to receive guidance? If I can put myproblems down for a few minutes, I can practice having faith in my HP. I can turn my heart to God and focus my mind.
Let me begin by concentrating on the experience, strength and hope shared at the meeting.
Do I make a daily quiet time just for self-care and for resting in God's good? Let me meditate, just for today. All ittakes is a few minutes, wherein I gently focus all my attention on God. And, when I take my problems to my HP in
Step Three, let me practice leaving them with Him...Ham Sah

Neither Black nor WhiteI am a man who was born into an Amish family. My father was troubled because he was shunned by his family forleaving the Amish community, so he was tied to booze for much of his life. My mother was a lady who hid herself inwork, work, and more work. She was the saint and my dad the sinner. I grew up being in a black and white world. The
little town I lived in did not have grey in it. It was this or that, but nothing in-between.
It took a lot of pain and suffering for me to learn about grey. My mom would drag me through all the tent revivals inthe summertime and attempt to get me into the church house as a teenager. I struggled with many things adults said
were important. Being a strong-willed child, I had a lot of different things rolling through my head and made somegood choices and some really poor ones, but the poor ones taught me a lot about grey.
I am a pretty hard-headed German—I wear it well, I have a lot of mixed messages that go through my mind, and myfeelings run through many different cycles in the course of a day. I don't have any problem admitting that I am powerless today because I can easily recall how unmanageable life was before, when I thought I was all-powerful.
Today, I am very grateful for "grey." I do understand that when folks think in black and white that I don't have to takethe time to correct them. All I have to do is allow the consequences of that thinking hit them and see how it works forthem. It did not work for me, but, then again, it really is none of my business how it all works for another. I am reallyglad I have allowed grey into my life...PaulFeelings
My feelings are part of me. If I suppress them, I suppress and essentially reject part of myself. Not a good way to go.
Today I have pain, emotional pain, and that's OK. Life is such that sometimes we have pain, and sometimes we havejoy. Even they can exist together like the sun that sometimes shines in the rain. Feel the feelings, and they do thework in us that they are supposed to. Already I am feeling better. Storms pass, rain ends, the sun shines alone again.
Thank God for all of them...Joan

2018 - 2019 EA Board of Trustees
Please feel free to contact members of the Board with questions or concerns
Gus S, AZ 602-319-3890 schloessergus@gmail.com President
Scott J, MN 507-276-0323 sdjakel@gmail.com Vice President/Treasurer
John W, MN 612-760-0313 johnwerner52@gmail.com Secretary
Colleen C, MN 651-245-5461 coyne2003@hotmail.com
Derita P, OH 216-624-3559 deritapippen@gmail.com

THE TWELVE TRADITIONS
The 12 Traditions are the guidelines by which our group and our fellowship function. They have proven over theyears to be an effective way of holding the fellowship and individual groups together.
Tradition 3: The only requirement for EA membership is a desire to become well emotionally.
It doesn’t matter who we are or what we have done, we are always welcome to attend an EA meeting; no strings
attached; no judgment. Why are we always welcome? Because we have a deep desire to become well emotionally.
Period! But walking through the door that first time takes courage. It took me three attempts to walk into my firstmeeting, simply because I was afraid of meeting the voice I had first encountered on a telephone call. I was terrified ofmeeting the person behind the voice or perhaps I didn’t know who I might see and perhaps be judged. Actually, theperson behind the voice and others in the room were happy, comfortable about who they were and indeed
welcoming. More than that I felt at home and experienced a sense of family within the group. If you happened acrossthis issue of the EA Connection while simply surfing the internet, I hope that you will have the courage to attend yourfirst EA Meeting as a result of reading this and other reflections on EA’s Tradition 3. Thanks for stopping by! Gus S
For me and many of us in the US, springtime is tax time. If we earn more than a certain amount, we are required toreport our income, and, if we owe taxes, we’re required to pay them. This is one of those many requirements of being
an adult. There’s a requirement for EA membership also, but it has more to do with our desire to join others in seeking
the serenity and emotional sanity we want so desperately. This sounds simple, but takes some thought. In myrecovery, intentions have been important. Am I sure I don’t desire to try to control or enable others? Do I want to play
the hero and save others? Am I looking for others to serve as my unpaid therapists? Do I secretly desire attention,
political discourse, or religious instruction? If so, EA is not the place for me. But if what I really want is an emotional
connection to others like myself with the intent of getting better, I’m in the right place...Colleen C
When I came to EA, I was emotionally and spiritually bankrupt. Moreover, I was on the verge of losing my job, which
would have resulted in my being physically/financially tapped out as well. In the beginning I couldn’t do much morethan get to meetings. If there had been more required of me, I may have stopped coming and felt defeated that here’s
one more thing that I couldn’t succeed in; and who knows where that sort of thinking would have led me? I wasrelieved then and grateful now that that was the only requirement for EA membership...Derita P
Having the sole requirement of desiring to be well emotionally in order to be a member of EA means that all of us canbelong to the EA movement and move towards relationship wholeness and mental health. All it takes is for us to be
sick of being emotionally troubled. If we prefer remaining emotionally troubled, or are fearful of moving ahead, westay in the pattern of mental illness that makes life unmanageable for us. Being an EA member is like being a memberof a greater whole, each of us playing an important role in the EA fellowship while working this simple program ofemotional recovery...Scott JREFLECTION FOR TODAY: Our incessant analyzing could mean our failure to get well and eventually cost us our lives. It is as
if we were standing in a burning fire, trying to understand the principles of oxidation and how or why the fire might havestarted before we make plans for escape. What we need to do is get out of the fire first and try to understand later. For along time we will stand on the edge of our old lives and think about going back. Have I made a clear choice? Today, March 1