Brevelle: Tarchannen Three Investigation. Stardate 40164.7. Ensign Anthony Brevelle recording. Lieutenant Susanna Leijten in command.
Susanna: You up and running, Brevelle?
Brevelle: Yes, Lieutenant.
Laforge: I've checked buildings four and five. Just like all the others. No phaser hits, no sign of a fight. It's like the entire outpost just vanished.
Hickman: Lieutenant Leijten, you'd better come see this. No footprints, no vehicle tracks. The wind probably erased them. But look.
Susanna: Freeze visual.
Susanna: That's Hickman on the right, Mendez on the left, and as already noted, the recording was made by Ensign Brevelle five years ago.
Picard: Commander Leijten, you said that before Brevelle deserted Starbase one one two last week, he'd been ill for several days. What about Mendez?
Susanna: Mendez was seen on the Aries an hour before she disappeared. According to witnesses, she seemed completely normal.
Riker: And Hickman?
Susanna: He just passed a routine physical on Alia Four with flying colors.
Laforge: No, wait, I know Paul Hickman. He's a family man, he's got two kids. He wouldn't steal a shuttle and desert.
Susanna: Geordi, he was spotted by a Federation supply ship yesterday, on course to Tarchannen three.
Picard: The original Tarchannen disappearances were never solved, were they?
Susanna: No, we never learned what happened or why. Forty nine people gone.
Riker: And five years later, the away team that was investigating their disappearances have started to disappear themselves.
Susanna: Geordi and I are the only two left.
Picard: Captain's log, stardate 44664.5. We've set a course to intercept Lieutenant Hickman's stolen shuttlecraft, and, hopefully, to discover the whereabouts of the other missing officers.
Susanna: And then I almost married Paul Bogrow.
Laforge: Bogrow? Bogrow, now which one was he?
Susanna: You remember. The one with the thin mustache.
Laforge: Oh, not Bogrow.
Susanna: I know.
Laforge: The one who always used to drive you crazy? You always thought he was so full of himself.
Susanna: Well, I decided I had prejudged him unfairly. And then I decided that I'd been right in the first place.
Laforge: Bogrow.
Susanna: What about you?
Laforge: I enjoy the bachelor's life too much.
Susanna: That doesn't sound like my little brother who always wanted advice on women.
Laforge: Well, obviously you were a great advisor. Well, Suz, what do you think?
Susanna: I don't know. But I'm not ashamed to tell you I'm a little scared, you know?
Laforge: Yeah, I know.
Susanna: Well, if anybody's going to figure this out, it'll be the Leitjen and La Forge Show, right?
Laforge: Yeah.
Susanna: We always made a good team.
Laforge: A hell of a team.
Riker: Commander La Forge, Commander Leijten, report to the Bridge. We have a fix on the missing shuttle.
Laforge: On our way, Commander.
Graham: Entering the Tarchannen system, sir.
Picard: Slow to impulse power. Mister Worf?
Worf: Long range sensors holding on the shuttlecraft, bearing zero one zero, mark two seven one.
Picard: Hail the vessel.
Worf: Lieutenant Hickman does not respond, sir.
Picard: Put a repeating message on all subspace channels. Order the Lieutenant to come about and stand to. Make it a priority one communiqué.
Worf: Still no response, sir.
Graham: The craft is now within visual range.
Picard: On screen.
Data: The shuttle's acceleration is increasing. Its trajectory is moving directly into the planet's atmosphere. He will reach an atmospheric interface at an altitude of two hundred and ten kilometers.
Riker: If he stays at that speed, he'll self-destruct.
Data: That is correct, Commander.
Picard: How soon, Mister Data?
Data: Fifty three seconds, sir.
Picard: Options?
Graham: He's out of transporter range.
Laforge: He's still too far away to get a positive lock with the tractor beam, Captain.
Picard: Open a channel.
Worf: Open.
Picard: Lieutenant Hickman, listen carefully. This is Captain Picard of the Enterprise. You are in danger. You must slow your rate of approach.
Data: The shuttle is approaching the outer thermosphere, Captain.
Riker: He's panicking.
Data: At current rate of acceleration, the shuttle will be destroyed in twenty eight seconds.
Data: Sixteen seconds to impact.
Picard: Lieutenant Hickman, you must do what I tell you. Reduce your velocity and bring your craft to a positive pitch of twenty degrees, now.
Data: The shuttle's entering the lower ionosphere, sir.
Worf: Captain, sensors detect two more Federation shuttlecraft on the planet surface. No life signs.
Picard: Number One, prepare your away team.
Riker: Worf, Data, Geordi.
Susanna: I'd like to volunteer to join you, sir.
Riker: Commander.
Riker: Commander Leijten, Geordi, check out the shuttle. Data, Worf, you've got the perimeter.
Susanna: It's the shuttlepod Mendez stole from the Aries.
Data: No life signs, Commander.
Worf: Sir, I am certain we are being watched.
Laforge: Commander Riker. Found it in the shuttle. Where's Commander Leijten?
Riker: Riker to Susanna, report. Fan out. Let's find her.
Laforge: Susanna! La Forge to Leijten.
Susanna: Over here.
Laforge: Where have you been?
Susanna: Mendez and Brevelle are alive. You saw the footprints?
Laforge: Yeah, but they're not human.
Susanna: They're here. Just stand still and listen. You can feel it. They're here.
Laforge: I'm not picking up anything. Wait a minute. Where are you going? Susanna?
Susanna: Stay away.
Laforge: Suz?
Laforge: La Forge to Enterprise, medical emergency. Two to Sickbay.
Susanna: Do I look as bad as I feel?
Laforge: You look fine, now.
Susanna: What happened?
Crusher: Your blood chemistry is way off. You had a histamine response, to what I don't know. I'm going to run a complete blood and tissue analysis.
Susanna: I need to get back to the surface.
Crusher: Until we have some answers, I don't want you to leave the Enterprise.
Susanna: I have work to do.
Crusher: Look, Commander, you may have just had an anxiety reaction down there, but I've got to know for sure.
Laforge: Might not be such a bad idea to take it easy for a while.
Susanna: I'm not going to stay locked up on this ship while the investigation's going on.
Picard: Your devotion to duty is admirable, Commander, but Doctor Crusher is right. You will remain on the Enterprise until we know whether or not this is connected to the disappearance of the others.
Susanna: Captain.
Picard: We have completed our survey on the surface. Analyzing that data will keep us busy for a while.
Susanna: Yes, sir. I understand.
Laforge: Data's got a preliminary report, if you're up to it.
Susanna: Sure. Let's get going.
Picard: What about La Forge?
Crusher: I gave him a complete bioscan. The results say he's in perfect shape.
Picard: That's what the reports said about Mendez and Hickman before they disappeared.
Susanna: Captain Picard's wrong. The way to handle this is to get back down there with a dozen away teams, fan out from the shuttle, we could cover a lot of ground in a hurry. Use proximity detectors, infrared sensors.
Laforge: Susanna.
Susanna: Oh, Geordi, it's started. What if what happened to the others is happening to me?
Laforge: You don't know that. Suz, I'm here, and I'm not going to let anything happen to you, okay? Okay, come on.
Data: During microscopic examination of the torn uniform, I discovered these alien skin cells.
Susanna: Source?
Data: Undetermined.
Laforge: Without something else to cross-reference, it would take us weeks to try and identify them.
Data: Fortunately, we have more evidence. We were able to determine that these footprints found near the shuttle were not made by any known Tarchannen life form.
Susanna: If we're pursuing a theory that somehow unknown aliens are involved, I think I should tell you that we didn't find tracks like that during the original investigation.
Data: The planet is subject to frequent sandstorms. Footprints might have been obliterated prior to your arrival. Doctor Crusher and I will begin to search the medical database in an attempt to match these with some known life form.
Susanna: Aliens or no aliens, why would our people start returning after five years, to be abducted?
Laforge: Some sort of compulsion like a post-hypnotic command?
Susanna: Something that happened while we were down there the first time?
Laforge: We can go back to the mission record, construct a log of everyone's movements.
Susanna: Look for some commonality, something we all touched. Maybe a plant, or the sand.
Laforge: Or even something we ingested. It could even be in the air itself.
Crusher: The parameters are pretty broad, Data. Any match we make is going to be inconclusive at best.
Data: I am aware of that, Doctor. However, I can see no other reasonable course of investigation available to us. And we may not have much time.
Crusher: You're worried about Geordi, aren't you?
Data: I am an android. It is not possible
Crusher: for you to feel anxiety.
Data: Starfleet personnel have vanished. Others may be at risk. We must do the best we can to find out why. However, I am strongly motivated to solve this mystery.
Laforge: Freeze visuals.
Susanna: We're wasting our time.
Laforge: That's not how you felt before. It was your idea to look for some sort of commonality.
Susanna: Yeah, well, I was wrong. We're not going to find anything this way. We should go back to the planet. It's all down there. Everything we need to know.
Laforge: That's just not an option. At least, not until Captain Picard says it is. Computer, resume.
Susanna: I can't look at that anymore. It hurts my eyes. I can't think. My brain feels like it's wrapped up in a blanket.
Laforge: Take a break, all right? I'll work on this.
Susanna: I don't need a break. I need to get off the ship.
Laforge: Susanna, why don't we go and see Doctor Crusher?
Susanna: Forget Crusher and forget your logs. Tarchannen's down there, Geordi. It's waiting for us. That's where we should go.
Laforge: Susanna, you can't leave. Susanna. Susanna!
Susanna: Geordi!
Crusher: Her blood pressure's still falling. Apply the T-cell stimulator. We have got to stabilize her immune system.
Crusher: She has developed an extreme sensitivity to light. We're trying to make her as comfortable as we can.
Laforge: Oh, God.
Susanna: Geordi?
Laforge: Susanna, hold on, okay? Doctor Crusher will help you, so just hold on.
Susanna: It's inside of me, Geordi. I can't fight it. It's winning.
Laforge: Don't give up. Do you hear me? You can't give up, Suz.
Crusher: This is one of Susanna's altered skin cells, and this is one of the alien cells Data found.
Picard: They're almost identical. How do you explain that?
Crusher: Jean-Luc, I think the people from Tarchannen Three who disappeared weren't abducted. I think they were transformed into another species.
Laforge: Can you stop it, Doctor?
Crusher: The T-cell stimulator will slow the rate of change, but until I find the cause.
Picard: Is the Enterprise at risk?
Crusher: No. I checked the cell wall integrity. It's viability is extremely low. I don't think it's possible for Susanna to transmit it.
Laforge: Then how did she get it?
Crusher: I wish I knew. The only thing I do know, Geordi, is that it's very possible that you'll be next.
Laforge: But I had two full bioscans today. You said I was fine.
Crusher: I gave Susanna a bioscan, too. I didn't find anything wrong with her, either.
Laforge: How long?
Crusher: Brevelle was sick for days before he left. Mendez was normal an hour before she disappeared. You may have weeks or very few hours.
Laforge: Then there's not much time to waste. I should get back to work.
Crusher: Geordi, until I know what we're dealing with, I think you should stay here, in Sickbay.
Laforge: Doctor, you said it would help if you knew the source of this. If I can continue my analysis of the mission records, I might find an answer.
Picard: Mister La Forge, what if you begin to change? What if you feel compelled to go down to the planet like the others?
Laforge: Program the computer to monitor my movements. That way we can be sure that I don't leave the ship. What would you do, Captain? Would you sit it out here in Sickbay or try to learn what it is that's got you and maybe stop it?
Picard: Very well, Mister La Forge. You proceed with your investigation, but I want you to report to Doctor Crusher for a bioscan at the start of day watch.
Laforge: Aye, sir.
Crusher: And Geordi, if you have symptoms of any kind, I want to know immediately.
Laforge: Understood.
Hickman: One to transport.
Susanna: I want to make another sweep of the perimeter. La Forge, you start at building four. Mendez and Brevelle begin at two. I'll take five.
Laforge: All right, computer. Analyze audio elements from time index fourteen four seven to fifteen five eight. List all anomalies.
Computer: No audio anomalies present.
Laforge: Any subspace projections, z-particle emissions, interferometric frequencies?
Computer: No subspace projections present. No z-particle emissions present. No interferometric patterns present.
Laforge: Damn.
Data: Geordi. May I inquire how your investigation is proceeding?
Laforge: It's not.
Data: Have you attempted an audio analysis?
Laforge: Yes, Data. And a spectrographic analysis, and a screen for ionizing radiation. I even ran an enhancement for micro-seismic disturbances. I've tried it all, okay? I'm sorry, Data.
Data: There is no need for an apology. Perhaps if you indulged in a brief rest period, you would be able to approach this problem with a fresh point of view.
Laforge: Yeah, you're probably right, Data, but I've got to keep scanning these records while I can.
Data: May I can assist you?
Laforge: If I knew what I was looking for. Rally, Data, I think it's just a matter of me going over it, maybe finding something I forgot. I'll let you know if I come across anything, all right? All right, computer, one more time.
Ogawa: Sorry to disturb you, Doctor.
Crusher: That's all right. What's happened?
Ogawa: I thought you should see this.
Crusher: Her skin is simulating light. A radiant reaction. Some sort of mimetic ability?
Ogawa: That's not all. Her body temperature is dropping.
Crusher: It's as if she's generating a disruptive field. I can barely get any readings off her now. What's her rate of transformation?
Ogawa: It's increasing.
Crusher: That's not possible. It should have been inhibited by the T-cell stimulator. Unless. If there's a foreign body inside her that's producing these changes, something like a viral crèche.
Ogawa: A very small one if our scans haven't found it.
Crusher: I want a full genetic analysis. We're going to examine any abnormality we find no matter how insignificant it seems.
Hickman: One to transport.
Laforge: Computer, delete the audio.
Laforge: Wait a minute. Freeze visual. Whose shadow is that?
Computer: Please restate question.
Laforge: Computer, the shadow currently displayed in section B three, what is its source?
Computer: Unknown.
Laforge: Come on, it's got to belong to somebody. Computer, replay a visual of the last time index. No audio, and slow to fifty percent. Okay, Brevelle's behind the camera ,Susanna and I head off in that direction. Mendez moves off that way. Freeze visual. Now, magnify four times, and spectrally enhance those shadows. Computer, do you have sufficient data to compile a holographic simulation of this visual record?
Computer: A simulation would be limited to areas scanned by the visual recording device.
Laforge: Good, fine. Scan the entire record and then recreate it on holodeck three.
Laforge: Computer, is the Tarchannen simulation ready?
Computer: Affirmative. Program complete. Enter when ready.
Laforge: Computer, scan Starfleet records and create a simulation of Brevelle. Place him where he was while recording this. Okay, good. Computer, based on their speed and direction, can you extrapolate each officer's movements as they walk out of the recording device's field of view?
Computer: Affirmative, with an increasing probability of error reaching ninety five percent after ten seconds.
Laforge: Understood. Run simulation. HOLO-
Suz: I want to make another sweep of the perimeter. La Forge, you start at building four. Mendez and Brevelle, you begin at two. I'll take five.
Laforge: Computer, freeze. It's all happening too fast. Computer, reverse simulation. Run it back to time index fourteen seven two.
Laforge: Freeze program. Computer, remove La Forge. And now remove Leitjen. And now remove Mendez.
Laforge: Computer, using vector analysis, identify the source of this shadow.
Computer: There is no object in the program which could generate the shadow.
Laforge: There has to be something between the camera light and this wall. Computer, given the distance between the light and the wall, can you determine the most likely shape and position of the object causing this shadow?
Computer: There is insufficient data to reconstruct the requested object.
Laforge: All right, let's say that my friend and I here are about the same size, say one pint seven meters. Now, can you extrapolate its shape and its position?
Computer: Affirmative.
Laforge: Do it.
Crusher: There, in the thymus. Some sort of parasite. It's using Susanna's immune system to spread genetic instructions.
Ogawa: How did it get there?
Crusher: She could have become infected during the original mission. It's small enough to have entered through any of the mucous membranes. But it certainly isn't behaving like a typical parasite. It isn't feeding off of her. It's transforming her DNA to match its own.
Ogawa: There's not much of her original DNA left.
Crusher: And we're going to need unaltered genes or we'll never get her back. We've got to get that thing out of her now.
Riker: Any luck?
Data: Negative, Commander. Nothing in our survey suggests the source of a parasitic infection.
Crusher: Crusher to Bridge.
Picard: Go ahead, Doctor.
Crusher: The surgery was successful
Crusher: But it's going to be a few more hours before we know how her regenerative systems are responding. In the meantime, we'd better get Commander La Forge down here.
Picard: Very well, Doctor, keep us informed.
Crusher: Crusher to La Forge. Computer, locate Commander La Forge.
Computer: Commander La Forge is not on board the Enterprise.
Crusher: Bridge, the Computer says Commander La Forge is no longer on board. Is that correct?
Data: I am showing no transporter activity.
Worf: All shuttles are secure.
Riker: Negative. There's no indication that he's left the ship.
Picard: Computer, what was the last known location of Commander La Forge?
Computer: Holodeck three.
Crusher: Captain, if Geordi has transformed, he may be virtually a chameleon.
Crusher: The skin develops mimetic capabilities. He may still be on board, but undetectable to our sensors.
Worf: You search the structure. I will take the perimeter.
Worf: Commander.
Riker: Geordi's uniform.
Hedrick: Security. We have an intruder in transporter room six. Argh.
Data: Captain, the security lockout on Transporter room six has been broken.
Picard: Re-engage now.
Data: I cannot, sir. The transporter cycle has already begun.
Picard: Captain's log, stardate 44668.1. Doctor Crusher's research indicates that we have less than an hour before Commander La Forge's transformation becomes irreversible. However, all attempts to locate him on the surface have failed.
Worf: I do not read any life signs on the surface.
Picard: Our sensor array is useless. We must find some other way of locating him.
Data: Captain, if we can get close enough to Geordi, we can read his absorption spectrum with an ultraviolet light.
Riker: Can you modify an emergency beacon to operate on UV?
Data: Yes, sir.
Picard: Make it so. Number One, as soon as Data is ready, I want you to lead an away team.
Riker: Aye, sir.
Riker: How long, Data?
Data: I must replace the emitter module and reconnect the power supply. It will take approximately two minutes to complete the modification, sir.
Hedrick: Hedrick to Commander Riker.
Riker: Go ahead.
Hedrick: I've been able to determine La Forge's transport coordinates. He beamed down next to the Aries shuttle.
Riker: Acknowledged. He's on foot, couldn't have gotten too far. Let's assume a radius of ten kilometers.
Worf: That still leaves a search area of more than three hundred square kilometers.
Riker: We've got to narrow that down. What's happening with the enhanced sensor arrays?
Worf: All scans are still negative.
Riker: We've got to find a way to track him. What about the high-resolution EM scans?
Worf: We are adjusting sensors to read Commander La Forge's absorption spectrum, but it will take several hours.
Riker: Geordi doesn't have several hours.
Data: I have completed modifications, Commander.
Riker: Excellent. Doctor Crusher, meet us in Transporter room six immediately.
Crusher: He's going to need a sedative. Give me ten cc's of kayolane.
Susanna: Doctor Crusher.
Crusher: Say, you look a lot better than you did an hour ago.
Susanna: What did you do?
Crusher: We've removed some kind of parasite from your thymus.
Susanna: No, no, no. It's not a parasite, Doctor. It was their method of reproduction, to plant a DNA strand in a living host that causes metamorphosis. Geordi? He's gone?
Crusher: Yes.
Susanna: He's gone back to the planet?
Crusher: Try to stay calm.
Susanna: No, but we have to find him.
Crusher: An away team is preparing to search for him.
Susanna: You'll never be able to find him. I'm the only one who can.
Susanna: No, you must turn them off. The light frightens them.
Riker: What about the ultraviolet?
Susanna: That's beyond their visual spectrum. They won't run away from it.
Worf: He could be several kilometers away by now.
Susanna: No, he's here. They're all here.
Susanna: There.
Crusher: Geordi?
Susanna: Geordi, stop!
Susanna: No, wait.
Susanna: Geordi? Geordi, my voice is familiar. Listen to it. You can feel that we share this. You know I'm not a threat. The others, Mendez, Brevelle, they don't exist as humans any more, but a part of you still does. You're not one of them yet, Geordi. I can help you if you'll just trust me. I know what's going on inside of you, the war you're fighting with yourself. Your humanity slipping away. The instinct to run, it's overpowering, but they know how to beat it now, Geordi. Look at me! I've come back, Geordi. Let me take you back, too. Just take my hand. Please.
Crusher: Crusher to Enterprise. Lock on to Commander Leitjen's signal. Prepare to beam two directly to Sickbay.
Susanna: We're going home, Geordi.
Picard: Is there no hope for Brevelle or Mendez?
Susanna: None.
Laforge: Susanna.
Susanna: I'm right here, Geordi, and so are Doctor Crusher and Captain Picard.
Crusher: Here's your visor, Geordi.
Laforge: Lieutenant Commander La Forge reporting for duty, Captain.
Picard: Welcome back, Mister La Forge.
Crusher: Geordi, this species, can you communicate with it?
Laforge: No. They act on instinct alone. In another few minutes, I wouldn't have responded to you, Susanna.
Picard: Then we will leave them be. I'll order warning beacons placed in orbit and on the surface. Hopefully, no one else will have to go through what you did.
Laforge: You know, down there, I didn't know who you were, and yet somehow I believed you, I trusted you.
Susanna: Must've been because of all the good advice I used to give you.
Laforge: Thanks.


Crusher: You were like a brother to me. Do you remember? We used played in the park near the lake.
Barclay: Yes, of course. Every summer, you came to Bergerac.
Crusher: You used to make swords out of the reeds, and when you cut your hand you would come running to me, and I would say, Let me see. Oh! How did you do that?
Barclay: Playing near the Porte de Nesle.
Crusher: And how many did you plat against?
Barclay: No more than a hundred.
Crusher: Tell me!
Barclay: No.
Crusher: Let it go.
Barclay: What?
Crusher: Let it go.
Barclay: Let it go. Let it go. You tell me what you were going to say. Do you dare?
Crusher: I do dare. I love someone.
Barclay: Ah!
Crusher: He does not know.
Barclay: Ah!
Crusher: Not yet. But he is proud, noble, brave and beautiful.
Barclay: Beautiful?
Crusher: What's the matter?
Barclay: With me? Nothing. It is my hand. He is in the Guards?
Crusher: Since this morning. Baron Christien de Neuvillette. In your own regiment.
Barclay: Ah.
Crusher: Promise me. Promise me to be his friend.
Barclay: I promise.
Crusher: Oh, I love you. I must go now. Oh, and tell him to write me. A hundred men! What courage!
Barclay: Oh, but I have done better since.
Riker: Bravo!
Troi: Wonderful! Wonderful.
Data: Lieutenant Barclay's performance was adequate, but clearly not rooted in The Method approach. I do not understand why.
Riker: Data, because it's polite.
Laforge: Good job, Reg. And only what, six weeks of lessons.
Crusher: Good job, period.
Barclay: We have a patient teacher.
Crusher: Ah, Worf, I have an opening in my workshop.
Troi: Well done.
Barclay: Thank you, Counselor.
Troi: You've come a long way, Reg.
Barclay: After more rehearsals than I can count.
Troi: I don't just mean your acting ability. It takes a great deal of courage to put yourself on display like that.
Barclay: You think so?
Troi: There was a time when nothing could have dragged you onto a stage in front of an audience. You've made tremendous progress.
Barclay: I, I guess.
Troi: Don't you think so?
Barclay: Well, I just feel more more comfortable playing somebody else. Maybe all this is not any better than escaping into a holodeck fantasy.
Troi: I disagree. This isn't fantasy, it's theater. You used to withdraw onto the holodeck. You isolated yourself inside your own imagination, avoiding contact with real people. Look at yourself now. Look at all the other people you're with. You're not just acting, you're interacting. Give yourself some credit, Mister Barclay.
Barclay: Maybe you're right.
Picard: Captain's log, stardate 44704.2. We have arrived at the Argus Array, a remote subspace telescope at the very edge of Federation space. The unmanned structure mysteriously stopped relaying its data nearly two months ago.
Data: The fusion reactors that power the array are extremely unstable. There is a high risk of overload.
Riker: What about the computer systems?
Data: They do not seem to be functioning at all, sir.
Worf: Captain, I am picking up an unidentified device one point eight kilometers from the array.
Picard: On screen. Magnify.
Riker: That's some kind of probe. I'll bet that's what damaged the array.
Picard: Is it emitting any signals, Lieutenant?
Worf: Negative, sir. I show no activity.
Picard: Mister La Forge, why not go out and take a closer look.
Laforge: Aye, sir. Lieutenant Barclay, report to the main shuttlebay.
Laforge: Enterprise, this is shuttle five in position, ready to begin a short-range scan.
Riker: Proceed, shuttle five.
Laforge: Reg, why don't we begin with the passive high-res series, all right?
Barclay: Electromagnetic band?
Laforge: Give it a try.
Barclay: I'm picking up visual wavelengths only. Between forty five hundred and seven thousand angstroms.
Laforge: Let's try the neutron densitometer.
Barclay: Nothing.
Laforge: Hmm. Doesn't seem to want to give up any secrets. Let's go to active scan.
Barclay: No, no modulation.
Laforge: Really? You are definitely not from our neighborhood. Increase to three point zero.
Barclay: Commander?
Laforge: Yeah, Reg?
Barclay: Thanks for assigning me to this mission.
Laforge: Don't mention it. You're one of my top engineers. It's about time you got in on some of the interesting stuff. This, this is why I'm in Starfleet.
Barclay: There's still no modulation.
Laforge: Hit it with a positron emission.
Laforge: What was that? Computer's down, Reg. Reg?
Picard: Captain's log, supplemental. An intense energy surge from the alien probe has severely disabled the shuttle's onboard computer. The away team has been transported directly to Sickbay, where Lieutenant Barclay remains under observation.
Riker: Any indication of the probe's energy source, Data?
Data: No, sir. Power emissions do not match any known radiation patterns. We have not encountered this technology before, sir.
Picard: Very well. Isolate the probe and place it in tow. We'll take it to Science Station four oh two in the Kohlan system.
Worf: Captain, the probe has begun to move. It is approaching the Enterprise.
Riker: Shields up.
Worf: Aye, sir.
Crusher: There was enough energy in that flash to overload your optic nerves. It knocked you unconscious.
Laforge: My visor must have filtered it out.
Crusher: Exactly. But there was no apparent retinal damage and the cornea looks fine. But I'm still waiting for a full sero-amino readout. I'll call you when it comes in. I'd like this done as quickly as possible, Ensign.
Barclay: You shouldn't have to wait too long for the results.
Crusher: What do you mean?
Barclay: Couldn't you use a global mode in your scanner? It would be a lot faster.
Crusher: That's not possible. We're talking about human cells here, not isolinear circuits. I think you'd better stick to engineering, Lieutenant.
Barclay: A cell has a an electromagnetic signature just like a circuit element does. Theoretically, it should work with just a few adjustments. I could set it up for you, if you'd like.
Worf: Probe now closing at fifteen point three meters per second. Collision course.
Data: Captain, sensors are reading no particulate emissions or subspace field distortions.
Picard: Then how is it able to move?
Data: Method of propulsion is unknown, sir.
Riker: Ensign, take us away from it. One quarter impulse.
Anaya: Aye, sir.
Worf: The probe is matching our speed and course.
Data: Captain, an energy field is forming around the device. Intensity is three point two terawatts and increasing.
Worf: Sir, the shuttlecraft shields did not provide sufficient protection for its computer. Our computer may also be vulnerable. I recommend withdrawal to a safe distance.
Picard: Ensign Anaya, full about. Half impulse.
Anaya: One half impulse.
Worf: The probe is following.
Picard: Options, Number One?
Riker: We can't use photon torpedoes. An explosion this close could cripple us.
Worf: Sir, recommend full phasers.
Picard: Proceed.
Worf: Firing phasers.
Worf: No effect, Captain.
Data: The probe's field intensity is continuing to build, sir. We are in danger.
Riker: Riker to La Forge. Can you increase phaser power?
Laforge: Attempting to now, Commander. Isolate phasers eighty to one twenty. Shunt all the plasma
Barclay: To the emitters. Yes, sir, I'm already on it. Ready.
Laforge: Phasers are as hot as we can make them, Captain.
Picard: Mister Worf.
Worf: Aye, sir.
Riker: Nothing.
Picard: Go to warp two.
Anaya: Aye, sir. Warp two.
Worf: The probe is still with us, sir.
Riker: At warp two?
Worf: Yes, sir.
Data: Captain, the probe's energy output is overloading our shields. Failure anticipated in forty seven seconds.
Picard: I'm willing to entertain suggestions.
Worf: Captain, we're dropping to impulse.
Larson: Commander, warp power has been transferred to the shield grid.
Laforge: Yeah, but by whom?
Laforge: Barclay, what are you doing?
Barclay: Lieutenant Barclay to Captain Picard. You can fire photon torpedoes.
Barclay: Maximum yield, full spread.
Riker: We're too close.
Barclay: I'm certain the shields will hold.
Picard: Mister La Forge?
Laforge: I don't know how he did it, but shield strength has been increased by three hundred percent.
Laforge: It should be enough, Captain.
Picard: Mister Worf. Photon torpedoes. Maximum yield, full spread.
Worf: Aye.
Picard: Thank you, Mister Barclay.
Barclay: You're welcome, Captain. Barclay out. I'm sorry if I overstepped my authority.
Laforge: Don't mention it.
Picard: Captain's log, stardate 44705.3. The Enterprise has destroyed the alien probe, but now we are left with the difficult task of repairing the Argus Telescope. Failure to do so would represent an incalculable scientific loss.
Riker: Mister Barclay. Everyone's still trying to figure out exactly how you did it.
Barclay: Well, it just occurred to me that I could set up a frequency harmonic between the deflector and the shield grid using the warp field generator as a power flow anti-attenuator, and that of course naturally created an amplification of the inherent energy output.
Riker: Uh huh. I see that.
Picard: I'm glad you could join us, Mister Barclay. Your report, Mister La Forge.
Laforge: Each of the telescope's subspace antenna clusters is powered by its own fusion reactor, but a single computer controls them all.
Riker: So all eighteen reactors were affected when the computer was damaged?
Laforge: That's right. They're starting to overload, and could eventually go critical. The explosion would destroy the Array, and I wouldn't want to be next door when that happens.
Data: A standard isolation procedure would be advisable.
Laforge: I agree. We'll cut off each reactor from the damaged control system and repair them one by one.
Riker: How long will that take?
Laforge: Two to three weeks at least.
Picard: All right, Mister La Forge.
Barclay: I don't agree. We could repair all of the reactors simultaneously instead of one by one.
Picard: Simultaneously? All eighteen?
Barclay: Yes, sir.
Laforge: But the Argus computer is inoperable.
Barclay: Not entirely. The core memory is still intact, and we could program a completely new control system.
Data: An interesting suggestion, Lieutenant. However, that approach would require much more time than our original plan. At least seven weeks.
Barclay: I could have it ready for you in two days.
Riker: What?
Barclay: If you could assist me in the morning, Commander.
Laforge: Sure, Reg.
Barclay: The moon, yes, that'll be my home, my paradise. I shall find there all the souls I love. Socrates, Galileo. And when I arrive they will question my worthiness. What the devil is he doing there among us? Philosopher, scientist, poet, musician, duellist! Here lies Hercule Savinien De Cyrano de Bergerac. I would not have you weep any less for that charming, good, and handsome Christien. I only ask this, that as the great cold surrounds my bones, you allow a double meaning for your mourning veil. And when you let fall your tears fall for him, some few will be for me.
Crusher: That was a real improvement.
Barclay: Same time, day after tomorrow?
Crusher: Same time.
Troi: Reg? May I join you?
Barclay: Of course, please. Sit down, Counselor.
Troi: Hard at work?
Barclay: I'm getting prepared for tomorrow's meeting in Engineering. We're planning our repair strategy.
Troi: I really enjoyed the scene you just performed.
Barclay: You're a very forgiving audience.
Troi: Not at all. I thought you were brilliant. You've changed.
Barclay: Is that a professional opinion?
Troi: Pure observation.
Barclay: No, it's true. I can't explain it. In the last few days I've found confidence I never knew was there.
Troi: I'm proud of you, Reg. I'm glad for you, too. Well, I'd better be going.
Barclay: Must you?
Troi: I think so.
Barclay: Wouldn't you like to take a walk with me through the arboretum? The zalnias should be in bloom.
Troi: Reg, as your former counselor, I don't think it would be appropriate.
Barclay: I don't need a counselor. What I need is the company of a charming, intelligent woman.
Troi: Goodnight, Mister Barclay.
Laforge: Where's Lieutenant Barclay?
Larson: I stopped by his quarters on my way over. He wasn't there.
Laforge: Computer, location of Lieutenant Barclay.
Computer: Lieutenant Barclay is on holodeck three.
Einstein: G sub I, J of t as t approaches infinity.
Barclay: G of t over G naught.
Einstein: So it is, so it is.
Barclay: I still don't see how you're going to incorporate quantum principle into general relativity without adjusting the cosmological constant a lot more than you're doing here.
Einstein: If we increase the value as you suggest, we must face the possibility of twenty six dimensions, instead of ten.
Barclay: I don't think I could deal with that.
Einstein: I certainly could not.
Barclay: If the semiset curved into the subatomic, the infinities might cancel each other out.
Einstein: Gruss Gott. They just might.
Laforge: We had a meeting at oh seven hundred.
Barclay: I'm sorry, Commander. Thank you, Professor. End program.
Laforge: What was that all about?
Barclay: I had some ideas late last night. I needed to consult with the computer about some quantum electrodynamic calculations. A holodeck Einstein program seemed like the best way. I guess I went a little overboard.
Laforge: A little? Most of the stuff on that blackboard was way out of my league. And yours too.
Barclay: Not really. I just haven't thought along those lines before. It's all pretty evident now, and if you were to put your mind to it I'm sure
Laforge: Reg, ever since our run in with that probe, something's different about you.
Barclay: What, because I'm beginning to behave like the rest of the crew? With confidence in what I'm doing?
Laforge: You just spent the entire night arguing grand unification theories with Albert Einstein!
Barclay: Yes, but
Laforge: Reg, something's happened to you, and we can't ignore that.
Barclay: Yes. I've finally become the person I've always wanted to be. Do we have to ask why?
Laforge: Yeah, I think we do.
Crusher: Incredible! The production of neurotransmitters in your brain has jumped by over five hundred percent. Pre and postsynaptic membranes have increased permeability to match it. I couldn't even guess at your IQ level now.
Barclay: Probably somewhere between twelve hundred and fourteen fifty.
Crusher: But that isn't all. The corpus callosum, the connecting bridge between both sides of the brain, it is so active now that the hemispheres are essentially behaving as one.
Laforge: So, it's not just raw intelligence we're talking about here.
Crusher: No. Creativity, resourcefulness, inspiration, imagination, they've all been enhanced. Lieutenant, you could very well be the most advanced human being who has ever lived.
Riker: Whatever that alien probe did to him, Barclay now seems to know more about the internal workings of the Enterprise than anyone else on board.
Picard: The question is, how are we going to deal with it.
Riker: We could confine him to his quarters.
Laforge: How can we do that? What's he done? We're talking about locking a man up for being too smart.
Riker: If he's been influenced by an alien, wouldn't that put us all at risk?
Crusher: Not necessarily. It might be something as simple as an allergic reaction to a bee sting.
Picard: Has Mister Barclay done anything that could be considered potentially threatening?
Troi: Well, he did make a pass at me last night. A good one.
Laforge: I'd hardly consider that a threat.
Troi: No, but it's certainly unusual behavior for Barclay.
Crusher: There's something else, Captain. He taught violin technique at the music school last night.
Riker: I didn't know Barclay played the violin.
Crusher: He didn't, not until last night.
Laforge: Look, if we want to save the array, we need Barclay. It's as simple as that.
Picard: Until he does something more menacing, I see no reason why we should prevent him from continuing his work.
Larson: Larson to Commander La Forge.
Laforge: Go ahead, Lieutenant.
Larson: We're having trouble containing reactor nine, sir. It's starting to chain.
Laforge: I'm on my way.
Riker: You said he made a pass at you, but you failed to mention whether he was successful or not.
Barclay: Thermal levels up one hundred seventy seven percent. Comparable increase in neutron emissions.
Laforge: Is the interface between the computer and the array still in operation?
Barclay: Yes, but our computer is too slow to direct the repairs. The parameters are changing too quickly for it to keep up.
Laforge: Then we'll have to try a remote shutdown from here.
Larson: Transmitting commands to the array now, sir. Starting close down sequence.
Barclay: Brower, increase the intake of liquid helium three into the reactor wall. We've got to cool it off.
Brower: Transmitting commands. Thermal levels increasing, sir.
Laforge: What happened?
Barclay: Unclear. The interface isn't fast enough.
Larson: Commander La Forge. Overload indications on Argus generator five, seven and fourteen.
Laforge: Damn!
Barclay: I can't do anything from here. I have to find a better interface.
Laforge: La Forge to Bridge. We're looking at a cascade reactor failure on the Argus.
Laforge: I don't think we're going to pull this one out.
Data: Reactor Nine will reach critical in ten minutes, forty three seconds. The subsequent explosion will create a chain reaction along the entire length of the Array, sir.
Picard: Ensign, standby for a jump to warp two.
Anaya: Yes, Sir.
Riker: La Forge, you've got ten minutes. Mister Worf, Red alert.
Worf: Aye, Commander.
Barclay: Computer, begin new program. Create as follows, workstation chair. Now, create a standard alphanumeric console positioned for left hand. Now an iconic display console positioned for right hand. Tie both consoles into the Enterprise main computer core, utilizing neural-scan interface.
Computer: There is no such device on file.
Barclay: No problem. Here's how you build it.
Data: Argus reactor nine twenty eight seconds to critical.
Riker: Get us out of here.
Picard: Warp two, Ensign.
Anaya: Yes, sir. Helm's not responding.
Worf: Captain, we have lost computer control.
Riker: What?
Data: Twelve seconds to critical.
Picard: Go to manual.
Anaya: I'm attempting that, sir
Riker: There's not enough time.
Worf: Computer is coming back online, sir.
Data: Captain, the Argus reactors are shutting down. We are no longer in danger, sir.
Picard: What happened?
Data: Unknown, sir.
Riker: Geordi, what did you do?
Laforge: It wasn't me, sir.
Picard: Computer, how were the Argus reactors shut down?
Barclay: A neural interface was created to expedite the repairs.
Riker: Barclay?
Picard: Computer, respond.
Barclay: I am responding, sir. I'm sorry if I caused you any alarm. It was necessary in order to secure the Array.
Riker: Barclay!
Riker: Barclay, what's going on? Barclay!
Barclay: Yes, Commander, it's me.
Barclay: I'm sorry, Captain, I was only trying to help. Our computer was too slow to compensate for the overload on the Array. So I created an interface that communicated my thoughts directly to the central processing unit.
Riker: Exactly what does that mean?
Barclay: My body is as you see it here, but much of my higher brain functions and memory have been transferred to the starboard computer core.
Picard: Mister Barclay, remove yourself from the computer system. Leave the holodeck.
Barclay: I'm afraid I can't, sir.
Picard: Why not?
Barclay: My primary cerebral functions are now operating almost entirely from within the computer. They have expanded to such a degree that it would be impossible to return to the confines of my human brain. Any attempt to do so would mean my death.
Laforge: That's it. I've disconnected the visual and audio pickups. We can talk without being monitored by the computer.
Worf: By Barclay.
Picard: Report, Mister La Forge.
Laforge: It is now almost impossible to tell where Barclay ends and the computer begins. He's actually rewriting the isolinear chips each time he extends himself a little further.
Riker: How do we get him out of there?
Laforge: We don't. Not without killing him.
Picard: This is an intolerable situation. I have no wish to harm him, but I cannot allow Mister Barclay to continue to act as the computer. I don't care how smart he is.
Data: Lieutenant Barclay has not yet extended himself into the Engineering subsystems. It may be possible to establish an ODN bypass directly to the Bridge.
Picard: That still won't give us control of the ship.
Laforge: No, but it would give us access to the propulsion systems. Enough to get us to the next Starbase.
Riker: How long would it take to set that up?
Laforge: A few hours.
Picard: Make it so.
Barclay: Commander La Forge?
Laforge: Yeah, Reg?
Barclay: I thought you would be in your quarters.
Laforge: No, I'm just catching up on some work, you know? That level three diagnostic we talked about. How're you doing?
Barclay: I wish I could convey to you what it's like for me now. What I've become.
Laforge: Yeah? Try.
Barclay: I can conceive almost infinite possibilities, and can fully explore each of them in a nanosecond. I perceive the universe as a single equation, and it is so simple, I understand.
Laforge: You understand?
Barclay: Everything.
Laforge: Well, do you understand how this happened to you?
Barclay: I believe it is a gift. That I have been chosen to fulfilll a great purpose.
Laforge: Ah ha.
Barclay: Do you suppose all of this has changed the way people think about me?
Laforge: To tell you the truth, Reg, we don't know what to think.
Barclay: I've been concerned about that, but soon everyone will understand what I can do for humanity.
Laforge: What do you mean?
Barclay: We have always perceived the maximum speed of the Enterprise as a function of warp, but I know now there are no limits. We will explore new worlds that we could never before have reached in our lifetime.
Barclay: I will take us to them.
Worf: Captain, I am picking up subspace distortion.
Picard: Mister Data?
Data: This disturbance is the result of a highly charged graviton field emanating from our warp nacelles. It is creating a severe bias in the subspace continuum.
Picard: Mister Barclay, are you responsible for this graviton field disturbance?
Barclay: Yes, sir, I'm altering subspace in a way that's never been conceived of before. I'm fairly certain it will allow us to travel half-way across the galaxy in a matter of only
Picard: Mister Barclay, I want you to stop this experiment for now.
Barclay: Captain, if you'd only allow me to show
Picard: Mister Barclay, this is a direct order. Discontinue whatever it is you're doing.
Barclay: I really would rather not, sir. I'm positive that you'll be pleased with the result once I've finished showing
Worf: Audio is disconnected. We may speak freely.
Riker: How soon before the ODN process is in place?
Data: I have been monitoring Geordi's progress. It will be operational in seventeen minutes.
Troi: Captain, let me go to the holodeck and try and talk to him.
Worf: Sir, the subspace distortion continues to increase.
Barclay: Hello, Deanna.
Troi: Reg.
Barclay: I'm sorry that we can't take that walk in the Arboretum.
Troi: So am I. Reg, you've frightened all of us. I'm sure that wasn't your intent.
Barclay: Young children are sometimes frightened of the world. That doesn't mean that their parents should let them stay in their cribs.
Troi: Are we children to you now?
Barclay: I can see so much more than you are capable of. You should trust that. Deanna, I've always wanted to earn your respect.
Troi: You've got it. From all of us. We don't need any more convincing. Please, obey the Captain's orders. Stop whatever it is you're doing.
Barclay: You must trust me.
Troi: How can we trust an officer who doesn't follow orders?
Barclay: Trust me.
Troi: The Captain will do everything in his power to stop you.
Picard: Picard to La Forge. Status?
Laforge: Ready, Captain.
Picard: Proceed.
Laforge: Acknowledged.
Barclay: Commander?
Laforge: What?
Barclay: You're too late.
Data: Captain, we have not regained control of the propulsion systems. The ODN bypass to the Bridge has been blocked.
Riker: Barclay!
Barclay: Yes, Commander Riker?
Riker: Whatever it is you're doing out there, you've got to stop it.
Worf: Sir, we're going in.
Picard: Mister Barclay, respond at once!
Worf: Audio's disconnected.
Picard: Lieutenant, take a security team to holodeck three. Disconnect Mister Barclay from the computer.
Worf: Aye, Captain.
Barclay: I want you to know, Lieutenant Worf, that I understand your duty in this matter.
Worf: Phasers. Maximum setting.
Barclay: And that I in no way will take your actions personally.
Worf: Conduits.
Riker: La Forge? Initiate stabilization procedure!
Laforge: Resetting stabilizers to match subspace flow matrix. Stand by.
Worf: He is protected by a force field. We could not disconnect him.
Picard: Mister Data?
Data: We are experiencing a quantum-model oscillation delay, doubling in intensity every twelve point three seconds. Bio-cellular disruption is imminent.
Anaya: Sir!
Riker: Where are we, Ensign?
Anaya: Unless something's wrong with our sensors, sir, we're almost thirty thousand light years from where we were.
Picard: The center of the galaxy.
Anaya: Sir, our heading's been altered. Approaching planetary cluster.
Data: Captain, all systems are back under helm control. The computer has returned to normal functioning.
Worf: Captain!
Alien: Emotive. Electro-chemical stimulus response. Cranial plate, bipedal locomotion, endoskeletal. Contiguous external integument.
Picard: I'm Captain Jean-Luc Picard of the Federation Starship Enterprise.
Alien: Hierarchical collective command structure.
Picard: Who are you?
Alien: Interrogative.
Picard: I am interrogative, yes, and I would appreciate an explanation.
Barclay: I think I can help you with that, Captain.
Riker: Mister Barclay. I thought it would be fatal if you left the holodeck.
Barclay: The Cytherians have reintegrated me, sir.
Alien: Cytherians.
Barclay: The probe was designed to instruct outsiders on how to reach this system. The technologies aren't always compatible. They failed with the Argus computer, and with the computer on board the shuttle, but they were able to reprogram me.
Picard: What do you want of us?
Alien: The same as you.
Picard: Mister Barclay?
Barclay: You're both on the same mission, Captain.
Picard: Mission?
Barclay: Yes, sir. The Cytherians are exploring the galaxy just as we are. The only difference is that they never leave their home. They bring others here. Their only wish, an exchange of knowledge. They want to know us.
Picard: Captain's log, stardate 44721.9. After ten days in the company of the Cytherians, the Enterprise has been safely returned to Federation space. We bring back knowledge of their race that will take our scholars decades to examine. Lieutenant Barclay is apparently no worse for his experience.
Troi: So how much do you remember?
Barclay: I remember doing everything. I just don't remember how or why.
Troi: How do you feel now?
Barclay: Smaller.
Laforge: Just plain old Barclay, huh.
Barclay: Always seems to come back to that, doesn't it.
Troi: You know. almost everyone has a moment in their lives when they exceed their own limits, achieve what seems to be impossible.
Laforge: The tricky part is what happens afterwards.
Troi: You almost always feel a sense of loss, but it is possible to carry something of that experience through the rest of your life in ways that you aren't even aware of now.
Barclay: I think I know what you're saying.
Laforge: Either way, Reg, you're an important part of this crew. In fact, I could really use your help with that level three diagnostic.
Barclay: Sure.
Troi: Excuse me, Commander, but I believe Mister Barclay and I had a date scheduled, for a walk in the Arboretum?
Laforge: The diagnostic can wait. I'll see you later.
Barclay: You really, you really don't have to do that.
Troi: I know.
Barclay: May I? Checkmate in nine moves.
Troi: I didn't know you played chess.
Barclay: I don't.


Picard: Captain's log, stardate 44741.9. We have arrived at Tagus Three where the Enterprise is to serve for host of the Federation Archeology Council's annual symposium. I look forward to giving tomorrow's keynote address with great anticipation.
Picard: Come.
Troi: I thought you'd like to know the Council members have beamed aboard and been assigned their quarters.
Picard: Excellent.
Troi: Captain, it really is quite late.
Picard: Tell me, Counselor, with regard to my lecture, what do you think would provide greater clarity? A chronological structure, or the division of each excavation's findings into various religious, sociological and environmental sub-groupings?
Troi: I thought you'd already decided on a chronological structure.
Picard: There is something to be said for a more scientific approach.
Troi: May I make a suggestion?
Picard: By all means.
Troi: Relax. You've written a brilliant speech.
Picard: It will need to be. Tomorrow I'll be addressing some of the greatest scientific minds in the Federation. Switzer, Klarc-Tarn-Droth, McFarland. Giants in the field of archeology. Compared to them I'm just an enthusiastic amateur.
Troi: I doubt they see of you as an amateur. Not when it comes to Tagus Three.
Picard: Well, it's true, I have done my homework I have examined the findings of every archeological expedition conducted on the planet surface.
Troi: It is unfortunate that the Taguans no longer allow outsiders to visit the ruins.
Picard: Indeed. Especially since we know so little about their origins. But I think that I have constructed some plausible theories of my own.
Troi: And I'm sure the council members will agree with you.
Picard: Your support is appreciated, Counselor.
Troi: Now goodnight, Captain.
Vash: Bring back any memories?
Picard: Vash. How did you get in here?
Vash: I came in through the window.
Picard: I had no idea you were a member of the Archeology Council. You are a member, aren't you?
Vash: More or less.
Picard: Why did you come to Tagus Three?
Vash: To see you, of course.
Picard: Is that the only reason?
Vash: Isn't it enough?
Picard: I wish I could believe you.
Vash: I really have missed you, Jean-Luc.
Picard: Excuse me.
Crusher: I'm sorry I'm late. Oh. Excuse me. I didn't realize you had company.
Picard: That's all right. Er, allow me to introduce you. This is Beverly, Doctor Beverly, Doctor Beverly Crusher. This is Vash. She's a friend of mine from the Archeology Council.
Crusher: I didn't mean to interrupt. The Captain and I often share morning tea together.
Vash: Yes, I know. Jean-Luc has told me all about you.
Crusher: Really? When was that?
Vash: On Risa, where we met.
Crusher: I see. That must have been during your vacation last year.
Picard: No. Yes. Yes.
Crusher: Well, I'm surprised he never mentioned you.
Vash: So am I. Doctor, are you busy?
Crusher: Not at the moment.
Vash: I was wondering, I would love to see some more of this marvelous ship.
Crusher: I would be delighted to show it to you.
Picard: I, er
Crusher: That is, if it's all right with you, Jean-Luc.
Picard: Of course.
Vash: Don't worry, I promise to behave myself.
Crusher: And this is Ten Forward, where the Council's welcoming reception will be held today.
Vash: Well, I can't think of a better location. Tell me, does Jean-Luc come here often?
Crusher: Not often. The Captain is a very private man. Would you like something to drink?
Vash: Please.
Riker: Eternity never looked so lovely.
Vash: Excuse me?
Riker: I was referring to the view. Eternity never looked so lovely.
Vash: You must be Commander Riker.
Riker: I'm afraid you have me at a disadvantage.
Vash: I didn't mean to interrupt. I believe you were about to tell me that my eyes are as mysterious as the stars.
Riker: You're Betazoid.
Vash: Not at all. It's just that Jean-Luc does a very good imitation of you.
Riker: He does?
Crusher: I see you two have met.
Riker: Not exactly.
Crusher: This is Vash, a member of the Archeology Council. And a friend of the Captain's.
Riker: So I've gathered.
Crusher: They met during his visit to Risa.
Riker: On Risa? That vacation must have been better than he let on.
Vash: You mean he never mentioned me to you, either?
Crewman: Doctor Crusher, please report to Sickbay.
Crusher: I'm afraid I won't be able to finish our tour. But perhaps Commander Riker could take over for me.
Riker: It would be my pleasure.
Riker: This is the main Bridge, the command center of the Enterprise and our last stop. Vash, Commander La Forge.
Laforge: Vash.
Vash: Hello.
Riker: Commander Data.
Vash: Hello.
Data: How do you do.
Riker: And this is Lieutenant Worf.
Vash: Hello.
Riker: Something wrong, Lieutenant?
Worf: I had not been informed that Council Members had been granted bridge clearance.
Riker: Well, I think we can make an exception in this case. Vash is a guest of the Captain.
Worf: Welcome aboard.
Vash: Thank you. Is this where Jean-Luc sits?
Riker: That's the big chair.
Vash: Well, I can see where being a starship Captain has its rewards.
Picard: I'm that glad you approve.
Vash: I suppose I'll go back to my room now and get ready for the reception.
Picard: By all means. Well, I suppose I'll see you then, then.
Vash: I look forward to it.
Riker: Fascinating woman.
Vash: I don't understand, I thought being the ship's Counselor meant the Captain confided in you.
Troi: He does, when he thinks it's necessary.
Vash: And he never spoke to you about me?
Troi: Not that I recall.
Vash: Not even a hint?
Troi: You must understand, the Captain is a very private man.
Vash: Private man.
Vash: I know. Excuse me?
Troi: Of course.
Worf: Nice legs. For a human.
Vash: Jean-Luc, we need to talk.
Picard: Excuse me.
Picard: The reception seems to be going well.
Vash: Forget the reception for a moment. Why have you never mentioned me to your friends?
Picard: What would you have me tell them?
Vash: Maybe that we met, for one thing. That we had an adventure together, some fun.
Picard: It wouldn't be possible.
Vash: Why not?
Picard: It would be inappropriate.
Vash: I wasn't expecting you to go into intimate details.
Picard: A Captain does not reveal his personal feelings with his crew.
Vash: Is that a Starfleet regulation, or did you just make that up yourself?
Picard: I'm sorry if you're upset.
Vash: And I'm sorry if my being here embarrasses you.
Riker: How was the reception?
Picard: Splendid.
Q: Jean-Luc, it's wonderful to see you again. How about a big hug? Well don't just stand there, say something.
Picard: Get out of my chair.
Q: Oh, and I was hoping for something more along the lines of, welcome back, Q, it's a pleasure to see you again my old friend."
Picard: We're not friends.
Q: You wound me, mon capitaine.
Q: There, perhaps now your manners will show some improvement.
Picard: What brings you here, Q? Have you been banished by the Continuum once again?
Q: Oh, hardly. They're still apologizing to me for the last time.
Picard: Then what is it you want?
Q: Do I always have to have a reason to stop by? I was merely in the sector, I. You force a confession from me. The truth is, I have a debt to repay.
Picard: A debt?
Q: To you. And it gnaws at me, and it interferes with each of my days.
Picard: I have no idea what you're talking about.
Q: Without your assistance at our last encounter, I never would have survived. I would have taken my own life but for you.
Picard: We all make mistakes.
Q: Your good deed made possible my reinstatement in the Continuum, and I resent owing you anything. So, I'm here to pay up. Tell me, what is it you wish and I'll be gone.
Picard: Just be gone. That'll do nicely.
Q: No, no, no, no, no. It has to be something more, more constructive. That's my new word for the day.
Picard: Some other time, Q. Right now I have other matters to attend to.
Q: Yes, your speech. I read it. It's dull, plodding, pedantic, much like yourself. I could help you with it.
Picard: No thank you.
Q: You've never actually been to the ruins at Tagus Three, have you?
Picard: No. They were sealed off more than a century ago.
Q: Well, that explains it, then. How can you write about something that you've never seen. I know, why don't I take you there?
Picard: Out of the question. That would mean breaking Taguan law.
Q: Must you always be so ethical? I suppose we could travel back in time. You could see what Tagus was like two billion years ago. They really knew how to party back in those days.
Picard: My answer is still no. My lecture will have to stand on its own. Now, will you please leave my ship.
Q: You are simply the most impossible person to buy a gift for.
Picard: Commander Riker, will you report to my Ready room?
Riker: Yes, Captain?
Picard: I've just been paid a visit from Q.
Riker: Q? Any idea what he's up to?
Picard: He wants to do something nice for me.
Riker: I'll alert the crew.
Crewman: Captain.
Vash: Who's there?
Picard: It's me.
Vash: Who?
Picard: Jean-Luc.
Vash: Yes?
Picard: May I come in?
Picard: Let me try to explain. I am by no means embarrassed by your presence here. On the contrary.
Picard: What's this? A map of the ruins? I thought that I was the only reason you came to Tagus.
Vash: I never fooled you for a second. Still, you are the most important reason.
Picard: Am I?
Vash: That's the trouble with being such a well-known liar. Even when I'm telling the truth, no one believes me.
Picard: This equipment will have to be confiscated.
Vash: Is that necessary?
Picard: If the Taguans were to catch you down there.
Vash: Oh, come on. You gave me the same warning about Sarathong Five.
Picard: I remember.
Vash: Well, it didn't stop me from going there. I brought back some very impressive artifacts, too.
Picard: Which no doubt you sold for a very impressive profit.
Vash: That's what I do!
Picard: Not on board my ship. I will not allow it.
Vash: Let's get one thing straight, though, Picard. I cannot change who I am for you or anyone else.
Picard: Nor can I change who I am.
Vash: Then we have nothing more to say to one another.
Picard: So it would seem.
Q: Sleeping alone?
Picard: I'm in no mood for your foolishness, Q.
Q: I knew there was something different about you. You seem tense, preoccupied, somewhat smaller. At first I thought it was that horrible lecture of yours, but I was mistaken.
Picard: Whatever game you want to play will have to wait until tomorrow.
Q: I had such high hopes for you, Picard. I thought you were a bit more evolved than the rest of your species. But now I realize you're just as weak as all the others. Still, it pains me to see the great Jean-Luc Picard brought down by a woman.
Picard: What woman?
Q: Don't play coy with me, Captain. I witnessed your little spat with Vash. Nor will I soon forget the look of anguish on your face. The pain, the misery. If I didn't know better, I would have thought you were already married.
Picard: You must be very bored, Q. Your imagination is running away with you.
Q: This human emotion, love, is a dangerous thing, Picard, and obviously you are ill-equipped to handle it. She's found a vulnerability in you. A vulnerability I've been looking for for years. If I had known sooner, I would have appeared as a female. Mark my words, Picard, this is your Achilles heel.
Picard: Believe what you wish.
Q: Do you deny that you care for this woman? Believe me, I'd be doing you a big favor if I turned her into a Klabnian eel.
Picard: Stay away from her, Q.
Q: I was just trying to help. My debt to you
Picard: Is hereby nullified. I don't want your help, your advice, your favors or for that matter, you. Do you understand? Once and for all!
Q: You would have me stand idly by as she lead you to your destruction?
Picard: Yes!
Q: As you wish.
Picard: Ladies and gentlemen, members of the Archeology Council. Welcome. Mystery. It is the mystery of Tagus Three that brings us together today. It is a mystery that has invited more argument, more deduction, more speculation than the best works of fiction. And if you'll excuse the conceit, I want to tell you about my detective story. For several years now, I have been trying to unravel the secrets of Tagus Three.
Picard: Needless to say, I've not succeeded.
Picard: However, I have, I believe, turned up some new information, that, if nothing else, raises a whole new set of mysteries and I hope that we can discuss them here together.
Picard: There have been nine hundred and forty seven known archeological excavations conducted on the planet's surface. Of those, some seventy four are generally believed to have revealed findings of major importance.
Picard: The earliest was some twenty two thousand years ago.
Picard: What the hell?
Picard: Q!
Troi: Is this Tagus Three?
Picard: I doubt there are many oak trees on Tagus. No, I think this is supposed to be Earth, somewhere round about the twelfth century. And this is England, or to be more precise, Sherwood Forest. Or at least Q's recreation of it.
Riker: That would explain these costumes.
Picard: Quite right, Number One. Or should I say, John Little.
Crusher: Well, if he's Little John, that makes you
Picard: I know. Robin Hood.
Worf: Sir, I protest. I am not a merry man.
Data: On the contrary, Lieutenant Worf. Your clothing identifies you with the character of Will Scarlett, just as Geordi's mandolin identifies him as Alan A-Dale
Riker: And you, Mister Data, bear a striking resemblance to Friar Tuck.
Sir Guy: I have you at last, Robin Hood.
Picard: Quick, into the forest. Mister Worf. That's an order.
Sir Guy: Enough, you fools. We'll never find them in the greenwood.
Crusher: I've managed to stop the bleeding.
Picard: Q. It's about time you showed up.
Q: I would prefer if you addressed me as His Honor the High Sheriff of Nottingham.
Picard: We will no longer share in this pointless fantasy of yours.
Q: Fine. stay here and do nothing. By midday tomorrow, your crew will be safely aboard their ship. Of course, you will have to accept the consequences of your inaction.
Picard: Consequences?
Q: What is the one thing that Robin Hood is most famous for?
Laforge: He robs from the rich and gives to the poor.
Q: Besides that.
Data: Perhaps you are referring to the rescue of Maid Marian from Nottingham Castle?
Q: Yes, Data. And it just so happens that Sir Guy of Gisbourne has decreed that Marian's head shall come off tomorrow at noon.
Picard: Vash.
Q: It's your choice, Robin. You can either take your ease in this sylvan glade or risk your life to save the woman you care nothing about.
Picard: My feelings toward Vash are irrelevant. I would attempt to save any innocent life, as you well know.
Q: Yes, but what about your merry men? Are you willing to jeopardize their lives as well? Is Vash's life worth more than Data's or Troi's or Worf's? You know, Worf, you'd make a perfect throw rug in Nottingham Castle.
Picard: Q, I ask you to put and end to this before someone gets hurt.
Q: Oh, that's impossible. You see, I've given this fantasy as you call it, a life of its own. I have no more idea what's going to happen than you do. But of one thing I am absolutely sure. If you dare come to Nottingham Castle, blood will be spilt.
Nurse: Oh, you'll wear yourself out with all that pacing, Milady.
Vash: I told you to stop calling me that. The name's Vash.
Nurse: My poor lamb. You've got a brain sickness for sure. Can't I get you something to ease your suffering?
Vash: I could use a drink.
Nurse: Well, I wasn't thinking of spirits, Milady, but I have some nice fresh leeches. To drain the fever.
Vash: Out. Get out.
Nurse: Oh, her mind's in an awful turmoil, Sir Guy.
Vash: Who the hell are you?
Nurse: Milady, everyone in Nottingham knows, Sir Guy of Gisbourne.
Vash: Sir Guy of what?
Sir Guy: Leave us.
Sir Guy: Do not mock me, Lady Marian. I'm prepared to offer you one last chance to change your mind. Will you marry me?
Sir Guy: I see. Then the execution will proceed as scheduled.
Vash: What execution?
Sir Guy: I warn you, Marian, this pathetic attempt at feigning madness will not save your life.
Vash: You mean I'm the one being executed? Sir Guy, wait a minute. Couldn't we talk this over? I admit, I haven't been myself lately. Maybe we've both been a bit hasty? Please?
Worf: Sorry.
Troi: Data, are you alright?
Data: The arrow impacted just above my sixth intercostal support, penetrating my secondary subprocessor. Fortunately, none of my biofunctions seem affected. Do not be concerned, Counselor. I believe your aim is improving.
Riker: We've got to get out of here, Captain.
Picard: Not we, Number One. I want you and the others to stay here until I return.
Riker: You're not going to try to save her yourself, sir?
Picard: This is not a mission. It's personal. It's between Q and myself. I don't want the rest of you involved.
Riker: Captain!
Picard: You have your orders, Commander. And I expect you to follow them.
Q: A touch sharper, shall we?
Q: Such benevolence, Sir Guy. Allowing the condemned prisoner fresh air?
Sir Guy: You're mistaken, Sheriff. Maid Marian has promised to be my wife.
Q: What? But that's impossible?
Vash: Not at all. Though I admit a maiden seldom has the opportunity to win herself such a noble husband.
Sir Guy: A toast. To the most beautiful bride-to-be in the whole of England.
Q: Don't drink that! It could be poison.
Sir Guy: Have you taken leave of your senses?
Q: A foul scheme of Robin Hood's. She's in league with him still, I'll warrant.
Vash: Robin Hood? Oh, Robin Hood. Oh, well, that was over long ago.
Q: All of Nottingham knows you're still in love with him.
Vash: That's a lie. He bewitched me. He put me under some evil spell.
Sir Guy: I suspected as much. You can add sorcery to the list of charges against that rogue.
Q: Sir Guy, if anyone's been bewitched here, it's you.
Sir Guy: Silence. Any more impudence and it'll be your head on the block. Guard, escort the Lady Marian to her chamber.
Vash: But I'd much rather stay with you.
Sir Guy: Of course you would, my child. But I have important business to attend to.
Sir Guy: Lovely creature.
Q: Intriguing.
Vash: One step closer and I'll scream!
Picard: Vash, damn it, it's me!
Vash: Jean-Luc! Oh, am I glad to see you. You wouldn't believe what I've been going through. One minute I'm on the Enterprise, the next thing I know I'm here in Nottingham. First, they're going to chop my head off, now I'm supposed to marry someone named Sir Guy, and everyone insists on calling me Marian.
Picard: Yes, I know.
Vash: You do? But how? You're Robin Hood!
Picard: My staff and I were brought here by an old adversary of mine named Q, and I'll tell you the rest of that once we're safe. Come, we don't have much time.
Vash: And the others are outside?
Picard: They're waiting for us back at Sherwood Forest.
Vash: You mean you came here alone?
Picard: That's right, now come on.
Vash: What kind of plan is that?
Picard: It's an excellent one if you'll just hurry up.
Vash: You do realize our lives are at stake here.
Picard: Only too well.
Vash: And this is the best strategy you could come up with? One man against an entire castle.
Picard: You have a better one?
Vash: How about this? You go, I'll stay here.
Picard: And do what?
Vash: Marry Sir Guy if I have to.
Picard: Well that's brilliant.
Vash: If there's a way to escape, I'll find it, eventually. With my head still attached.
Picard: You really believe I would leave you here?
Vash: I can take care of myself.
Picard: You are the most stubborn woman I ever knew.
Vash: Hey!
Sir Guy: There'll be no escape for you this time, Robin Hood.
Picard: You stay behind me.
Vash: You should have left while you had the chance.
Sir Guy: Well done, my dear.
Vash: Consider it my wedding gift to you, darling.
Q: Congratulations, Sir Guy. I see you've snared the jackal.
Sir Guy: It's Marian who deserves the credit. Took him with his own sword.
Nurse: You sent for me, Milady?
Vash: I want you to take this letter to Robin's men.
Nurse: You want me to go to Sherwood Forest at this time of night?
Vash: You'll leave immediately.
Nurse: But it's dark. I'll get lost. Besides, it's not safe. What with all them hedge robbers and worse lurking about.
Vash: Please, this is urgent.
Nurse: If you ask me, you'd be better off with Sir Guy. He's got a future. Why, you'll be living in London afore you know it.
Vash: But you must go, otherwise they'll kill him.
Q: Out.
Vash: How dare you barge in here like this
Q: I've come to apologize for my harsh words. I had no idea that you were so ruthless.
Vash: That's most gracious of you.
Q: I admit I was surprised, but no more surprised than Jean-Luc.
Vash: You're Q.
Q: Yes. And you are a very interesting woman. What is this?
Vash: Give me that.
Q: A letter to Riker. Quick, Come to Castle. Save the Captain. Why, this is wonderful. What marvelous duplicity. You certainly fooled Sir Guy, and me as well. I think you're worth further study.
Vash: Am I?
Q: Yes, but unfortunately we just don't have the time. Guards! Take this traitor away. It appears there's going to be a double execution.
Vash: This whole thing is your fault.
Picard: My fault?
Vash: Yes, your fault.
Picard: If you hadn't grabbed my sword we'd be back in Sherwood by now.
Vash: I grabbed your sword to prevent you from being killed.
Picard: Oh, really? Not as a wedding present for Sir Guy?
Vash: You know I had no intention of going through with that.
Picard: Do I? You should never have interfered.
Vash: You're the one interfering.
Picard: I was just trying to rescue you.
Vash: Well next time don't bother.
Picard: Don't you worry. I won't.
Q: Don't the two of you ever stop arguing? Now, tell me, Robin, as you stand here facing the termination of your insect existence, do you see what brought you to this end? Was she worth it?
Picard: Can we just get this over with.
Vash: Are you implying that I'm not worth it?
Picard: Q, your game was for my benefit. She is innocent in all of this.
Q: She is many things, none of them innocent.
Picard: Let her go.
Vash: Jean-Luc, you do care.
Q: A gallant gesture, Robin, but a futile one. Farewell. I hope the two of you are happy together.
Sir Guy: You have been found guilty of outlawry and high treason. Do you have anything to say before sentence is carried out?
Vash: I.
Sir Guy: Prepare them for the block.
Rabble: Off with their heads.
Laforge: There are too many of them.
Riker: Data, we need a diversion, now.
Sir Guy: Guards! Take Marian to the tower.
Sir Guy: I'll have you know I'm the greatest swordsman in all of Nottingham.
Picard: Very impressive. There's something you should know.
Sir Guy: And what would that be?
Picard: I'm not from Nottingham.
Vash: Jean-Luc.
Picard: It's over, Q! Get us out of here.
Q: My compliments, Picard. I doubt Robin Hood himself could have done much better.
Picard: If you have hurt any of my people
Q: Sadly enough, they're all fine, but my point is they could have been killed, and so might have you. All for the love of a maid. My debt to you, Picard, is paid. If you've learned how weak and vulnerable you really are, if you finally see how love has brought out the worst in you
Vash: Nonsense. You're absolutely wrong. It's brought out the best in him. His nobility, courage, self-sacrifice, tenderness.
Q: Oh, you're good. You're really good.
Picard: Enough of this.
Q: Indeed.
Riker: Everybody here?
Troi: Where's Vash?
Picard: Computer, locate Council Member Vash.
Computer: Council Member Vash is not aboard the Enterprise.
Vash: Hello, Jean-Luc.
Picard: Well, this is a relief. I thought that perhaps Q had found
Vash: Well he had some things to discuss with me.
Picard: Indeed? Surprised he's not busy gloating over his victory.
Vash: He was right about one thing, you know. As ridiculous as it was, his game did prove that you still care.
Picard: I may not show my feelings to my crew, but I do have them.
Vash: I'm going to miss you, Jean-Luc.
Picard: So, where are you off to now?
Vash: I haven't made up my mind.
Q: After all, she has the entire universe to choose from.
Vash: Meet my new partner.
Picard: Him?
Vash: Why not?
Picard: I'll tell you why not.
Q: Now, Jean-Luc, let's not be unkind.
Picard: He's devious, and amoral, and unreliable, and irresponsible, and, and definitely not to be trusted.
Vash: Remind you of someone you know?
Picard: As a matter of fact, it does.
Q: We're going to have fun. I'm going to take her places no human has ever seen.
Vash: Who can resist an offer like that?
Picard: As payment in full for your debt to me, you will guarantee her safety.
Q: She will not be harmed, Jean-Luc. I promise you that. Well, are you going to kiss her goodbye? All right.
Vash: Well? Aren't you?
Q: Oh, I'm sorry, I forgot my hat.
Vash: Goodbye, Jean-Luc.