" I was just sitting there, not doing a damn thing mind you, just quietly contemplating an inside story, when:1. a 10 year girl who was playing outside with her big sister on the trampoleen, said ""hey! whats that?"" 2. I ignored her, totally taken with the piece of chocolate in my hand, then I heard the word ""tree"" a few seconds later. 3. I crunched up my knees into a fetal postition and made sure my head was not visible while the little girl tried to show her sister what she had seen. 4. "" Hey! There is a man in the tree!"" Then a 13 year old boy who was playing hockey in the garden said: ""I cant see his face!"". 5 I quietly uttered a prayer of thanks for this. 6. Another girl about 15 years of age approaches and they all together start yelling things like: ""Thats funny!"" from little girl whom I had just recently seen dancing with headphones on in her sisters room. "" Waah! Hes too scared to come down!"" from the 13yr turd. In addition to many other jeers and such. 
7. They carried on with their game while I developed cramp and was looking for a way to get down soon to relieve my discomfort. They occasionally ventured a glance in my direction. 8. After ten minutes, I started my descent as quickly as possible. "" Hey! Its a boy!"" from that darn little girl. I climbed faster and faster. 
9. I fled into forest, squealing like a pansy.
10. I hung about watching the tree to see if they were going to come near. They did not. I trod in dog faeces as I climbed into the car 15 minutes later.

I am sure that they do not know of the paltform. Still, I suggest that we steer well clear of it for a week or two. Then do some serious camophlage work. I must make it clear that, although I take responsiblity for this mishap. I did nothing to attract their attention. This all happened on thursday the 28th. Cheers and by the way, welcome to Wikipedia!"