# The Man Who Laughs (Estes and Lauriat 1869)/Chapter 62

CHAPTER V.
THE WAPENTAKE.
ONCE, however, he felt it his duty to deviate from this prudent course, thinking that it might be well to make Gwynplaine a little uneasy. It is true that this idea arose from a circumstance much graver, in the opinion of Ursus, than the cabals of his fellow showmen or of the church.
Gwynplaine, as he picked up a farthing, which had fallen when counting the receipts, had, in the presence of the inn-keeper, drawn a contrast between the farthing, representing the misery of the people, and the die, representing (under the figure of Anne) the parasitical magnificence of the throne,—an ill-sounding speech. This observation was repeated by Master Nicless, and had such a run that it reached Ursus through Fibi and Vinos. It put Ursus into a fever. Seditious words, lèse Majesté. He took Gwynplaine severely to task:
"Watch over your abominable tongue. There is a rule for the great,—'Do nothing;' and a rule for the small,—'Say nothing.' The poor man has but one friend, silence. He should pronounce only one syllable, 'Yes.' To confess and to consent is all the right he has. He should say 'Yes' to the judge; 'Yes' to the king. Great people can beat us, if it so pleases them. I have received blows from them. It is their prerogative; and they lose nothing of their greatness by breaking our bones. The ossifrage is a species of eagle. ​Let us respect the sceptre, which is the chief of staves. Respect is prudence, and mediocrity is safety. To insult the king is to put one's self in the same danger as a girl who rashly attempts to pare the nails of a lion. They tell me that you have been prattling about the farthing, which is the same thing as the liard, and that you have found fault with the august medallion for which they sell us at market the eighth part of a salt herring. Take care! let us be serious. Consider the existence of pains and penalties. Suck in these legislative truths. You are in a country in which the man who cuts down a tree three years old is quietly taken off to the gallows. As to swearers, their feet are put into the stocks. The drunkard is shut up in a barrel, with the bottom out so that he can walk, with a hole in the top through which his head is passed, and with two in the sides for his hands, so that he cannot lie down. He who strikes another man in Westminster Hall is imprisoned for life and has his goods confiscated. Whoever strikes any one in the king's palace has his hand cut off. A fillip on the nose chances to bleed, and, behold! you are maimed for life. He who is convicted of heresy in the bishop's court is burnt alive. It was for no great crime that Cuthbert Simpson was quartered on a turnstile. Three years since, in 1702, not so very long ago you see, they placed in the pillory a scoundrel called Daniel Defoe, who had the audacity to print the names of the Members of Parliament who had spoken on the previous evening. He who commits high treason is disembowelled alive, and they tear out his heart and buffet his cheeks with it. Impress these notions of right and justice on your mind. Never allow yourself to speak a rash word, and at the first cause of anxiety run for it. Such is the bravery which I counsel and which I practise. In the way of temerity, imitate the ​birds; in the way of talking, imitate the fishes. England has one admirable point in her favour,—her legislation is very mild."
His admonition over, Ursus remained uneasy for some time; Gwynplaine, not at all. The intrepidity of youth arises from want of experience. However, it seemed that Gwynplaine had good reason for his easy mind, for the weeks flowed on peacefully, and no bad consequences seemed to have resulted from his observations about the queen.
Ursus, like a roebuck on the watch, kept a lookout in every direction. One day, a short time after his sermon to Gwynplaine, as he was looking out from the window in the wall which commanded the field, he became suddenly pale.
"Gwynplaine!"
"What?"
"Look!"
"Where?"
"In the field."
"Well?"
"Do you see that man?"
"The man in black?"
"Yes."
"Who has a kind of mace in his hand?"
"Yes."
"Well?"
"Well, Gwynplaine, that man is the wapentake."
"What is the wapentake?"
"He is the bailiff of the hundred."
"What is the bailiff of the hundred?"
"He is the præpositus hundredi."
"And what is the præpositus hundredi?"
"He is a terrible officer."
"What has he got in his hand?"
​"The iron weapon."
"What is the iron weapon?"
"A thing made of iron."
"What does he do with that?"
"First of all, he swears upon it. It is for that reason that he is called the wapentake."
"And then?"
"Then he touches you with it."
"With what?"
"With the iron weapon."
"The wapentake touches you with the iron weapon?"
"Yes."
"What does that mean?"
"That means, 'Follow me.'"
"And must you follow him?"
"Yes."
"Whither?"
"How should I know?"
"But he tells you where he is going to take you, does he not?"
"No."
"How is that?"
"He says nothing, and you say nothing."
"But—"
"He touches you with the iron weapon. All is over then. You must go."
"Go where?"
"With him."
"But where?"
"Wherever he likes, Gwynplaine."
"And if you resist?"
"You are hanged."
Ursus looked out of the window again, and drawing a long breath, exclaimed: "Thank God! He has passed. He is not coming here."
​Ursus was perhaps unreasonably alarmed about the indiscreet remark, and the consequences likely to result from Gwynplaine's words.
Master Nicless, who had heard them, had no interest in compromising the poor inmates of the Green Box. He was amassing, at the same time as the Laughing Man, a nice little fortune. "Chaos Vanquished" had succeeded in two ways. It not only made art triumph on the stage, but it made drunkenness increase in the tavern.