# Omniana/Volume 2/Sir George Etherege, &c

175. Sir George Etherege, &c.
Often and often had I read Gay's Beggar's Opera, and always delighted with its poignant wit and original satire, and if not without noticing its immorality, yet without any offence from it. Some years ago, I for the first time saw it represented in one of the London theatres; and such were the horror and disgust with which it imprest me, so grossly did it outrage all the best feelings of my nature, that even the angelic voice, and perfect science of Mrs. ​lington, lost half its charms, or rather increased my aversion to the piece by an additional sense of incongruity. Then I learnt the immense difference between reading and seeing a play,..no wonder, indeed. For who has not passed over with his eye a hundred passages without offence, which he yet could not have even read aloud, or have heard so read by another person, without an inward struggle? In mere passive silent reading the thoughts remain mere thoughts, and these to not our own,..phantoms with no attribute of place, no sense of appropriation, that flit over the consciousness as shadows over the grass or young corn in an April day. But even the sound of our own or another's voice takes them out of that lifeless, twilight realm of idea, which is the confine, the intermundium, as it were, of existence and non-existence. Merely that the thoughts have becoming audible, by blending with ​them a sense of outness gives them a sort of reality. What then when by every contrivance of scenery, appropriate dresses, accordant and auxiliary looks, and gestures, and the variety of persons on the stage, realities are employed to carry the imitation of reality as near as possible to perfect delusion? If a manly modesty shrinks from uttering an indecent phrase before a wife or sister in a private room, what must be the effect when a repetition of such treasons (for all gross and libidinous allusions are emphatically treasons against the very foundations of human society, against all its endearing charities, and all the mother virtues) is hazarded before a mixed multitude in a public theatre? When every innocent female must blush at once with pain at the thoughts she rejects, and with indignant shame at these, which the foul hearts of others may attribute to her!
​Thus too with regard to the comedies of Wycherly, Vanburgh, and Etherege, I used to please myself with the flattering comparison of the manners universal at present among all classes above the lowest with those of our ancestors even of the highest ranks. But if for a moment I think of those comedies, as having been acted, I lose all sense of comparison in the shame, that human nature could at any time have endured such outrages to its dignity; and if conjugal affection and the sweet name of sister were too weak, that yet Filial Piety, the gratitude for a Mother's holy love, should not have risen and hissed into infamy these traitors to their own natural gifts, who lampooned the noblest passions of humanity in order to pandar for its lowest appetites.
As far, however, as one bad thing can be palliated by comparison with a worse, this may be said, in extenuation of these writers; that the mischief, which they ​can do even on the stage, is trifling compared with that stile of writing which began in the pest-house of French literature, and has of late been imported by the Littles of the age, which consists in a perpetual tampering with the morals without offending the decencies. And yet the admirers of these publications, nay, the authors themselves, have the assurance to complain of Shakespear, (for I will not refer to one yet far deeper blasphemy)—Shakespear, whose most objectionable passages are but grossnesses against lust, and these written in a gross age; while three fourths of their whole works are delicacies for its support and sustenance. Lastly, that I may leave the reader in better humour with the name at the head of this article, I shall quote one scene from Etherege's Love in a Tub, which for exquisite, genuine, original humour, is worth all the rest of his plays, though two or three of his witty contemporaries were thrown in among ​them, as a make-weight. The scene might be entitled, "the different ways in which the very same story may be told, without any variation in matter of fact:" for the least attentive reader will perceive the perfect identity of the Footboy's account with the Frenchman's own statement in contradiction of it.
SCENE IV.
Scene, Sir Frederick's Lodging.
Enter Dufoy and Clark.
Clark.I wonder Sir Frederick stays out so late.
Duf.Dis is noting; six, seven o'clock in the morning is ver good hour.
Clark.I hope he does not use these hours often.
Duf.Some six, seven time a veek; no oftiner.
Clark.My Lord commanded me to wait his coming.
Duf.Matré Clark, to divertise you, I vill tell you, how I did get be acquainted vid dis Bedlam Matré. About ​two, tree year ago me had for my convenience discharge myself from attending [Enter a Foot boy] as Matré D'ostel to a person of condition in Parie; it hapen after de dispatch of my little affairé ———
Foot-b.That is, after h'ad spent his money, Sir.
Duf.Jan foutré de Lacque; me vil have de vip and de belle vor your breeck, rogue.
Foot-b.Sir, in a word, he was a Jack-pudding to a Mountebank, and turned off for want of wit: my master picked him up before a puppit-show, mumbling a hall-penny custard, to send him with a letter to the post.
Duf.Morbleau, see, see de insolence of de foot-boy English, bogre, rascale, you lie, begar I vill cutté your Troaté.
[Exit Foot-boy.
Clark.He's a rogue; on with your story, Monsieur.
Duf.Matré Clark, I am your ver ​humble serviteur; but begar me have no patience to be abuse. As I did say, after de dispatchè of my Affairé, van day being idele, vich does producé de mellanchollique, I did valké over de new bridge in Parie, and to devertise de time, and my more serious toughté, me did look to see de marrioneté, and de jack-pudding, vich did play hundred pretty trické, time de collation vas come; and vor I had no company, I vas unvilling to go to de Cabareté, but did buy a darriolé, littel custardé vich did satisfie my appetite ver vel: in dis time young Monsieur de Grandvil (a jentelman of ver great quality, van dat vas my ver good friendé, and has done me ver great and insignal faveure) come by in his caroché, vid dis Sir Frolick, who did pention at the same academy, to learn de language, de bon mine, de great horse, and many oder trické: Monsieur seeing me did make de bowe, and did beken me come to him: he did tellé ​me dat de Englis jentelman had de Letré vor de posté, and did entreaté me (if I had de oppertunity) to see de letrè deliver: he did tellé me too, it vold be ver great obligation: de memory of de faveur I had received from his famelyé, beside de inclination I naturally have to servé de strangeré, made me to returné de complemen vid ver great civility, and so I did take de letré and see it deliveré; Sir Frollick perceiving (by de management of dis affairé) dat l was man d'esprit, and of Vitté, did entreaté me to be his serviteur; me did take d'affection to his personé, and vas contenté to live vid him, to counsel and advisé him. You see now de lie of de bougre de lacque Englishe, Morbleu.