# The Vampire Bat

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The Vampire Bat is a 1933 American pre-Code horror film directed by Frank R. Strayer and starring Lionel Atwill, Fay Wray, Melvyn Douglas, and Dwight Frye. Some extra notes:
* The character Gussie Schnappmann, the hypochondriac who is the film's comic relief, uses a great deal of medical jargon, some of which is spoken incorrectly, which may or may not have been a purposeful improvisation. For example, "chordae tendineae" was said incorrectly by her in one line to sound like "cordac tendonseae". In this transcription, instances of these mispronunciations are generally changed to the correct words.
* A few character names—Weingarten and Doctor Holdstadt—are never mentioned in the film itself, but their names have been inferred in the transcription from descriptions in contemporary film magazines and newspaper articles linking these unmentioned character names to their actors.
Cast and Crew :
| Cast ||
| Role | Actor |
| | Lionel Atwill |
| | Fay Wray |
| | Melvyn Douglas |
| | Dwight Frye |
| | George E. Stone |
| | Robert Frazer |
| | Lionel Belmore |
| Crew ||
| Distributor | Republic Pictures, Netflix |
| Director | Frank R. Strayer (d. 1964) |
| Screenwriter | Edward T. Lowe, Jr. (d. 1973) |
| Cinematographer | Ira H. Morgan (d. 1959) |
| Based on available information, the latest crew member that is relevant to international copyright laws died in 1973, meaning that this film may be in the public domain in countries and jurisdictions with 50 years p.m.a. or less, as well as in the United States. ||
MAJESTIC PICTURES
presents
THE VAMPIRE BAT
RECORDED BY RCA PHOTOPHONE SYSTEM
Directed by
FRANK STRAYER
Produced by
PHIL GOLDSTONE
The Players
LIONEL ATWELL
FAY WRAY
MELVYN DOUGLAS
MAUDE EBURNE
GEORGE E. STONE
DWIGHT FRYE
ROBERT FRAZER
RITA CARLISLE
LIONEL BELMORE
WILLIAM V. MONG
STELLA ADAMS
HARRISON GREENE
Bürgermeister
Gustave Schoen
Bürgermeister Gustave Schoen But how else can we explain these terrible deaths? Von Else last night, five others before him—that's six, within as many weeks, Inspector. Our friends, neighbors that we've known for years, drained of their life's blood, found dead in bed, lifeless skeletons of skin and bone. Vampires are at large, I tell you—vampires.
Karl Brettschneider Yeah. Malignant demons who issue forth from their graves in the dead of night, to attack their victims and drink the blood from their veins. Brr!
Weingarten Gott im Himmel, Brettschneider, don't jest.
Karl Brettschneider Ah! That bloodsucking legend belongs in the same category with werewolves and all other peasant superstitions.
Sauer But the bats, man, the bats.
Weingarten Gott, yes! Big ones, so!
Karl Brettschneider Oh, now we're switching to bats again?
Bürgermeister Gustave Schoen There was an epidemic of giant bats in Kleinschloss in 1643. And at the same time, there was an outbreak of vampirism.
Karl Brettschneider Rot.
Bürgermeister Gustave Schoen Why, this record from the town archive proves it.
Karl Brettschneider Says it, not proves it.
Bürgermeister Gustave Schoen Well, I'll show you. I'll show you. Now, ah, here it is. "And on this day was von Haussmann hanged from a gibbet in the public square, after being convicted on a proven charge of vampirism. And on this same day, there did occur the departure of the bats—thousands of horrible flying creatures which infested the town for weeks. And on the night of this same day, February 13, in the year of our Lord 1643, was there a stake driven through von Haussmann's heart, and his head cut off with a gravedigger's shovel." There.
Karl Brettschneider Well, all the records in the world can't make me believe in vampires. There are bloodsucking bats, yes—in South America, thousands of miles from here, but not in Kleinschloss.
Weingarten But bats fly. They could fly here.
Bürgermeister Gustave Schoen You saw the bodies, all of them—two wounds on the neck right at the jugular vein; two wounds on the neck pierced and spread apart just as if two fang-like teeth had bitten through the flesh and right into the veins; and in every case, a blood clot, eight inches from the victim's neck—the mark of the feast, the Devil's signature.
Sauer Does that appear the mark of a human being or a demon's?
Weingarten God save us—the devils.
Karl Brettschneider You ought to make a pretty fair meal for a vampire. But let's be consistent. Are these human vampires or...or bats?
Sauer Vampires can take the shape of a human or a bat, just as they choose.
Karl Brettschneider Oh, they're magicians. Well, it doesn't make sense to me.
Bürgermeister Gustave Schoen The whole village is in terror. We live in closed houses, behind locked doors and bolted shutters, not daring to close our eyes, fearful lest this unseen silent death may find us in our sleep, for it is then that it strikes, swiftly, silently, ghastly.
Weingarten My room is tightly closed. The windows are barred—nailed down. Nothing can get in—nothing.
Karl Brettschneider But they tell me vampires can go through stone walls, like that.
Weingarten God save me. So they can.
Bürgermeister Gustave Schoen We've got to do something, I tell you. Kleinschloss will become a deserted village.
Karl Brettschneider Well, you might catch all the bats and drown them in the river.
Bürgermeister Gustave Schoen Karl, Karl!
Karl Brettschneider While you're hunting for vampires and chasing bats, I'm looking for a human being—a murderer, a fiend.
Bürgermeister Gustave Schoen Well, then don't jest about it. Do something.
Karl Brettschneider I'm trying to—every hour, every day, every night since this thing started!
Sauer Do you hear it?
Weingarten Hear it? Yes! Night after night, lying awake until dawn, waiting!
Karl Brettschneider For what?
Weingarten I don't know.
Karl Brettschneider That's what I thought.
Karl Brettschneider Goodnight, gentlemen. Don't let the vampires get you.
Karl Brettschneider Are your kisses dynamite?
Ruth Bertin Don't you like my kisses?
Ruth Bertin Well, how is my mastermind this evening?
Karl Brettschneider Well, if you want the truth, not so good.
Ruth Bertin The Bürgermeister and his grand council still stick to the vampire theory, hm?
Karl Brettschneider Stick to it? Ha! They're quoting history to prove it. I think you and Doctor von Niemann are the only sane people left in the village.
Ruth Bertin And you? What about you?
Karl Brettschneider Me? Well, I'm beginning to think I'm seven different kinds of a fool. Murders are being done under my very nose. I must be as blind as the bats themselves. I can't find a single clue.
Ruth Bertin Oh, but you will, Karl, you will.
Karl Brettschneider Well, I haven't.
Gussie Schnappmann Oh, Ruth!
Karl Brettschneider And here comes dear Aunt Gussie, to spread good cheer and hope.
Gussie Schnappmann Just what I thought—slaving your life away in this awful place. It hasn't got that nice, clean, wholesome smell of a hospital. How are you, Karl?
Karl Brettschneider Oh, quite well, thank you.
Gussie Schnappmann Well, I'm not. This clammy old place is bound to give me pericarditis, endocarditis, neuritis, this...well, anyway, rheumatism. Will you have some coffee?
Karl Brettschneider No, no thank you, Frau Schnappmann.
Gussie Schnappmann Well, just as well. There's only two cups. Here, dear, that'll take the chill out of your bones.
Ruth Bertin Thank you.
Karl Brettschneider Speaking of chills, Frau Schnappmann, did you know the village is supposed to be infested with ghouls and vampires?
Ruth Bertin Oh, Karl!
Karl Brettschneider Vampires! Pariahs among fiends—demoniacal creatures with huge canine teeth, who bite deeply into the necks of their victims, to quaff and gorge on blood—warm, human blood.
Gussie Schnappmann There's no such thing as a vampire, Karl Brettschneider. I don't believe in it. You're just saying that to frighten me, and I just won't be frightened. I'm entirely too sensible to believe in such rubbish.
Emil I beg your pardon.
Gussie Schnappmann Oh, so it's you.
Emil I'm sorry if I frightened you.
Gussie Schnappmann Who said you frightened me? I'm not afraid of anything.
Emil Could you tell me where Doctor von Niemann is?
Ruth Bertin Well, he drove to the village to see Martha, the old apple woman.
Emil Thank you.
Doctor von Niemann Is this what Doctor Haupt prescribed?
Martha's caretaker Yes, sir. She takes it in water.
Doctor von Niemann Well, continue giving it to her.
Martha's caretaker Yes, sir.
Doctor von Niemann It's stifling in here. Open these windows.
Hermann Gleib Hermann open windows. Me do! Me do!
Doctor von Niemann Well, she'll sleep well, now, poor soul. It won't be necessary to you to stay here. A goodnight's sleep will work wonders for her.
Martha's caretaker It was kind of you to come, Doctor.
Doctor von Niemann Oh. Martha has sold me apples for many years. Always a good, ripe, juicy one.
Hermann Gleib Martha give me apples. I like!
Martha's caretaker Shh!
Doctor von Niemann She wants her cross.
Hermann Gleib Hermann get. Hermann get. Here. Here now. There. For Martha. There. No.
Martha's caretaker She won't let it out of her sight.
Doctor von Niemann A terrible experience. To be attacked by a giant bat is enough to shatter anyone's nerves.
Martha's caretaker She talks about it all the time—how it flew in her face and tried to sink its teeth in her throat.
Hermann Gleib No, no, no, no! Bats no do. They soft, like cat. They not bite Hermann.
Martha's caretaker Be quiet, Hermann. See what you've done?
Doctor von Niemann There, there, there, Martha, there.
Doctor von Niemann She'll be all right. If she isn't, let me know.
Martha's caretaker Thank you for coming, Doctor.
Doctor von Niemann That's all right. Goodnight.
Martha's caretaker Goodnight.
Martha's caretaker Run along, Hermann. You can see Martha tomorrow.
Hermann Gleib Aw!
Kringen Ah, Doctor von Niemann.
Doctor von Niemann Hi, Kringen, how are you?
Kringen Much better, thank you kindly, sir, since you prescribed for me.
Doctor von Niemann That's right.
Kringen Go to bed, Hermann. Go to bed! You shouldn't be prowling on the streets. It's dangerous.
Hermann Gleib Aw!
Kringen I'm afraid.
Doctor von Niemann Afraid? Afraid of what, Kringen?
Kringen The bats, sir—big, giant bats, with wings like an eagle's.
Doctor von Niemann You saw this bat, you say?
Kringen I saw it swooping down the street. It came directly for my throat, sir.
Doctor von Niemann When was this, Kringen?
Kringen Last night, when they came to take von Else. It was a big monstrous thing. I saw it leap across the alley and into a window. I ran just as fast as my legs could carry me.
Doctor von Niemann And you said nothing about this?
Kringen There's enough fear in the village already. Maybe I should. Maybe I shou- I will. I'll tell the Bürgermeister.
Doctor von Niemann Yes, Kringen, that's the thing to do.
Hermann Gleib No! Bats...bats good. They not hurt Hermann.
Kringen He plays with them.
Hermann Gleib You! You no tell?
Kringen No. No, no, no, no, no, go to bed, Hermann. Go on. Go on, go to bed!
Doctor von Niemann You say he plays with bats?
Kringen His garret is filled with them. He makes pets of them.
Doctor von Niemann That's odd, very odd.
Kringen Maybe... Maybe he's it! Hermann prowls around the streets all hours of the night, just like an animal. Maybe he's the vampire.
Doctor von Niemann Now, don't start any gossip with that, Kringen. Heaven only knows where it might end!
Doctor von Niemann Goodnight.
Kringen Goodnight, sir.
Doctor von Niemann All right.
Hermann Gleib There. Now. Soft. Nice. There. There.
Kringen You see? What did I tell you?
Bürgermeister Gustave Schoen Perhaps there's something in what Kringen says.
Sauer Seems strange that a human being should want to play with bats.
Hermann Gleib Aah!
Stube
Kringen He isn't human, I tell you! He's in league with the devil!
Sauer Yes.
Martha Mueller Put it on. Put it on.
Martha's caretaker There.
Martha Mueller Thanks.
Martha's caretaker Now, go to sleep. You'll be all right in a few days—the dooctor says so.
Martha Mueller Close the window. Close the window. I'm afraid—the vampire!
Martha's caretaker Well, he said leave them open, but I'd have them closed.
Martha's caretaker Do you want the light?
Martha Mueller Leave the light. I'm afraid.
Martha's caretaker Well, I can't blame you for that either. I'll turn it down a little. Goodnight. If you want me, just pound on the floor. I'll hear you.
Martha Mueller All right, goodnight.
Martha's caretaker Goodnight, Martha.
Georgiana Herr Brettschneider is here to see you, sir. He's in the laboratory with Miss Bertin.
Doctor von Niemann Oh, thank you.
Doctor von Niemann Ah, here you are.
Ruth Bertin Good evening, Doctor.
Doctor von Niemann Good evening, Ruth. How are you, Karl?
Karl Brettschneider Well, I'd feel a lot better if I could find the solution to these murders.
Doctor von Niemann You don't believe in this vampire theory, then?
Karl Brettschneider Feh! Of course not, do you?
Doctor von Niemann There are many strange happenings, my boy—many mysteries beyond the power of the human mind to comprehend.
Karl Brettschneider Have you a theory which might explain these deaths?
Doctor von Niemann Well, I'll be pleased to discuss it with you, but...not now, not now. I have some very important work to do.
Karl Brettschneider Well, tomorrow, then?
Doctor von Niemann Tomorrow? Yeah, yes, perhaps. We'll see. Oh, this isn't so important, Miss Bertin, that you can't let it go till tomorrow?
Ruth Bertin All right, thank you, Doctor.
Ruth Bertin Oh, how about Martha?
Doctor von Niemann Huh? Oh, nothing serious. Just a case of nerves, that's all. Goodnight.
Ruth Bertin Goodnight.
Karl Brettschneider Goodnight, Doctor.
Doctor von Niemann Goodnight, Karl.
Martha Mueller Gasp!
Doctor von Niemann Name?
Doctor Holdstadt Martha Mueller.
Doctor von Niemann Age?
Doctor Holdstadt I don't know.
Doctor von Niemann Cause of death?
Doctor Holdstadt Like all the rest.
Doctor von Niemann The vampire?
Doctor Holdstadt Yes, yes, that's so.
Kringen When I said I was going to tell you, his eyes glowed up like coals of fire. His hand reached out towards me, as if he were going to sink it into my throat.
Sauer And weigh this well—he never works and never bathes, and yet he appears well-fed always.
Bürgermeister Gustave Schoen That's so, he does.
Sauer But what does he live on, then? I'll wager it's as Kringen says.
Townsman And my woman was in Martha's room tonight, when Hermann put a flower in her hand.
Sauer Strange business, if you ask me—mighty strange.
Townsman I'd hate to be in your shoes, Kringen.
Sauer Yes, after what happened tonight, I'd lock myself in my room, and pray God to protect me from the Devil.
Townsman in crowd It's Doctor von Niemann.
Townsman in crowd Good evening, Herr Doctor.
Doctor von Niemann Good evening.
Townsman in crowd Doctor von Niemann—Herr Doctor.
Townsman in crowd The vampire!
Karl Brettschneider Well, what do you make of it, Doctor?
Doctor von Niemann Are these two wounds similar to those found on the other bodies?
Karl Brettschneider Doctor Haupt can answer that for you, sir.
Doctor Haupt Yes, they were the same in every case.
Doctor von Niemann This is a strange condition, Karl, so strange that I doubt the evidence of my eyes. What was your conclusion, Haupt?
Doctor Haupt I diagnosed the wounds as having been made by needle-sharp teeth. Punctures are clean-cut, penetrating into, but not beyond, the jugular vein.
Karl Brettschneider Do you mean to say that you also believe they could've been made by teeth?
Doctor von Niemann Frankly I do.
Bürgermeister Gustave Schoen Ah, you see, Brettschneider?
Karl Brettschneider What kind of teeth, Doctor?
Doctor von Niemann An animal of some sort. It's hard to say. The fangs of a wolf, perhaps.
Kringen A werewolf.
Karl Brettschneider Could they have been made by, well, a bat, for instance?
Doctor von Niemann A certain species, yes. There are vampire bats. Doctor William Jameson, who explored many of the tributaries of the upper Amazon, states that bloodsucking bats do exist. He further asserts the victims often become blood drinkers themselves, citing a case in which he saw a native tortured to death on an ant hill by his tribe brothers. They swore he had become a human bat. And, states Jameson, he confessed it.
Karl Brettschneider Do you mean to say that such a thing as a human vampire is possible?
Doctor von Niemann Who can say? Historic records would have us believe that an evil soul, assuming there is such, can take any shape it pleases.
Bürgermeister Gustave Schoen So, why not get into that of a human being? Eh, Karl? Why not?
Karl Brettschneider Have you any literature on the subject, Doctor?
Doctor von Niemann Yes, I have many interesting volumes on my shelves that might prove very enlightening. I'll be glad to show them to you.
Karl Brettschneider I don't mind admitting that I'm up a tree—stumped!
Doctor von Niemann Well, we'll see what can be done, my boy.
Doctor Haupt No, no, no, Hermann. This is no place for you. Go away, my boy. Go away.
Hermann Gleib Aw!
Doctor von Niemann Goodnight, Schoen.
Bürgermeister Gustave Schoen Goodnight, Doctor.
Doctor von Niemann Goodnight, Haupt.
Doctor Haupt Goodnight, Doctor.
Doctor von Niemann See you in the morning, Karl.
Karl Brettschneider Thank you, Doctor. I'm sorry to have dragged you out at such an ungodly hour.
Doctor von Niemann Oh, that's all right, that's all right.
Hermann Gleib Ahh! Ahh! Ahh!
Doctor von Niemann A child, fleeing in the horror of the sight of death.
Kringen There goes the vampire! Arrest him! Lock him up! Kill him!
Karl Brettschneider Has the entire village gone mad? Hermann wouldn't harm a baby and you know it.
Kringen I've walked the streets of this village for over 40 years, but tonight's the end. He knows that I've told he plays with bats. He knows that I saw him sneak into Martha's house just before midnight.
Doctor von Niemann Perhaps he was taking her another flower, Kringen. The boy brought her one this evening while I was there.
Kringen He killed her just like he did all the rest! And now he's going to kill me! Unless he's killed with a stake driven through his heart, I'm a doomed man! He'll kill me! He'll kill me! I'm doomed! He'll kill me! He'll kill me! I'm a doomed man! He'll kill me!
Ruth Bertin Good morning, Mr. Brettschneider. What brings you to Kleinschloss so early?
Karl Brettschneider You!
Ruth Bertin Fibber. I heard the doctor tell Georgiana he expected you.
Karl Brettschneider I knew there was something else.
Ruth Bertin You're a delightful prevaricator, Karl, but not a very convincing one.
Gussie Schnappmann Oh, you don't mind me using your stethoscope, do you, Doctor?
Doctor von Niemann Not at all, Frau Schnappmann. But what seems to be the ailment this morning?
Gussie Schnappmann What say?
Gussie Schnappmann Oh.
Doctor von Niemann What seems to be the ailment this morning?
Gussie Schnappmann Well, Doctor, I am positive that I have valvular disease of the aorta. Or maybe it's...the right ventricle. There is something wrong with my heart. I can hear it beat—thump, thump, thump, thump—just like the book says.
Doctor von Niemann Well, if you didn't hear it beating—thump, thump, thump—just as the book says, I would say there is something wrong.
Ruth Bertin What? Without a moon?
Karl Brettschneider You have a heart of stone.
Ruth Bertin All right, then. Close your eyes.
Ruth Bertin Now.
Karl Brettschneider Oh, so, young lady.
Ruth Bertin It's too early in the morning, Karl, much too early.
Karl Brettschneider Oh, is it?
Ruth Bertin Oh, there's Aunt Gussie.
Karl Brettschneider Mm, she would show up just at a time like this.
Ruth Bertin Well, Aunt Gussie, what's the matter now?
Gussie Schnappmann I have palpitation of the auricular...ventricular mitral valves of the chordae tendineae.
Ruth Bertin You mean you're heart's beating.
Gussie Schnappmann Of course it's beating. Doctor von Niemann tried to assure me, but I know...I know it's serious. I'm liable to go, just like that.
Ruth Bertin Did he prescribe for you, dear?
Gussie Schnappmann Yes, monoacid ester, sylisonic acid.
Ruth Bertin You mean salicylic acid, don't you?
Gussie Schnappmann Well, sylisonic or salicylic, it's helped me. My heart is much quieter. Hello, Karl.
Karl Brettschneider Hello.
Gussie Schnappmann Oh, Karl, you will be good to her when I'm gone, won't you?
Karl Brettschneider Yes, of course I will, Frau Schnappmann.
Gussie Schnappmann Well, I'm not gone yet, and you can't marry her, unless I say so. Don't forget that. Oh, my heart.
Ruth Bertin There, Auntie, you'll be all right. Just rest a while. What you need is...
Gussie Schnappmann What?
Ruth Bertin Rest, dear, and quiet.
Ruth Bertin Aunt Gussie has a heart like a steam engine.
Ruth Bertin Come on!
Hermann Gleib Meow! Meow!
Gussie Schnappmann Here, kitty, kitty, here! Kitty, kitty, kitty, here! Kitty poo! Come on, come on, kitty poo. That's a baby, come on. Come on, kitty, kitty, kitty poo. Come on, kitty cat. Baby, come on, kitty poo, come on. Ahh! Oh! A turtle! You nasty little beast! Oh!
Gussie Schnappmann Don't you know it's wrong to steal?
Gussie Schnappmann You've cut yourself.
Hermann Gleib See? Blood. Mm!
Gussie Schnappmann Ugh! Stop it! Stop it!
Hermann Gleib No hurt me. No hurt.
Gussie Schnappmann Oh, you poor thing. Now, you wait right here and I'll run in the house and got something for that finger. A subcutaneous wound like that might easily result in a tetanus infection.
Hermann Gleib Tetan-...tetan-...
Gussie Schnappmann Tetanus—lockjaw. Not that you need be afraid. From the way you talk, I think you've got it already. Look, here's a nice juicy apple for you.
Doctor von Niemann Ah, this is it. Traité sur les apparitions des esprits et sur les vampires, by Augustin Dom Calmet, in 1746. "Let us suppose that these corpses do not actually stir from their tombs, but only the ghosts or spirits appear to the living. Wherefore do these phantoms present themselves and what is it that energizes them? Is it actually the soul of the dead man which has not yet departed to its final destination?"
Gussie Schnappmann Fiddlesticks. Now, how could a corpse buried under four or five feet of earth get out to do any such foolishness? I don't believe it.
Karl Brettschneider It's a fair question, Doctor. How could it?
Doctor von Niemann Well, according to accepted theory, the vampire dematerializes its body and reintegrates it outside the grave.
Gussie Schnappmann It's a good explanation if you can believe it. And while I'm standing here listening to all this rubbish, there's a poor man in the garden in danger of a tetanus infection. Now, what should I do for him, Doctor? Shall I apply Mercurochrome, or a 2% solution of dichloride?
Doctor von Niemann Well, either will do. Get some gauze and some Mercurochrome, Emil.
Gussie Schnappmann Thank you, Doctor. I'll wait here.
Doctor von Niemann Difficult to believe, isn't it?
Karl Brettschneider It's impossible to believe. And yet, it would explain these deaths, wouldn't it?
Bürgermeister Gustave Schoen Ah, Brettschneider. Pardon our intrusion, Doctor von Niemann, but after what you saw last night, you'll be interested in this, as well.
Karl Brettschneider Well, what's happened?
Bürgermeister Gustave Schoen Kringen was found dead an hour ago, with the two punctures in his neck and not a drop of blood in his body. And what's more, Hermann Gleib has disappeared.
Karl Brettschneider What?
Weingarten Now are you convinced that we were right and you were wrong?
Sauer That would be proof enough for anybody. Kringen said Hermann would get him and he did.
Bürgermeister Gustave Schoen Well, Brettschneider?
Karl Brettschneider I appoint you my deputy. Organize a searching party and comb this countryside from one end to the other. Find Hermann Gleib and bring him in but don't harm him. Do you understand?
Sauer What good will that do? He is the vampire. There's only one thing for us to do when we find him—kill him and drive a stake through his heart.
Karl Brettschneider Hermann Gleib will be tried by a court of law! If the charge against him is proven true, the law will decide what to do him, not you! Now get your men together and do as I tell you.
Bürgermeister Gustave Schoen That's the way to talk.
Karl Brettschneider I'm going into town for a little while, Doctor. Would you care come along?
Doctor von Niemann Oh, I hardly believe so. There's little to be done until they find the boy. If you need me then, I'll...
Karl Brettschneider Alright, thanks, I'll let you know.
Gussie Schnappmann I feel as though I was going to faint.
Ruth Bertin Oh, there, Auntie, there's nothing here to be afraid of. Here comes Emil with your Mercurochrome and bandages. Run along, now, and take care of that patient of yours.
Gussie Schnappmann Oh, heavens, I forgot all about him.
Gussie Schnappmann Oh, my heart! Oh!
Ruth Bertin Poor Auntie. She's had every ailment in the book.
Doctor von Niemann And a lot that aren't, I'm afraid.
Ruth Bertin Particularly, a palpitation of the auricular or ventricular tricuspid and mitral valves, Doctor?
Doctor von Niemann Well, I had to tell her something to satisfy her.
Gussie Schnappmann Here, here. You mustn't do that. Now, where's that finger?
Hermann Gleib You good like Martha.
Hermann Gleib She give me apples. Hermann like you.
Gussie Schnappmann Are you Hermann?
Hermann Gleib Me Hermann. You give me apple? Hermann give you...nice, soft bat.
Gussie Schnappmann No, Hermann, no! Get away, Hermann! I know you! I know you! Don't you get me! Hermann!
Gussie Schnappmann Go away, go, Hermann! Go away!
Doctor von Niemann What is it, Georgiana?
Georgiana I just found this in Emil's room.
Doctor von Niemann Well?
Georgiana It belonged to my friend, Martha Mueller.
Doctor von Niemann Are you certain?
Georgiana I gave it to her myself. Martha died last night. I find her crucifix in Emil's room. Doesn't that mean Emil is the one Herr Brettschneider is seeking?
Doctor von Niemann This amazes me, Georgiana. It's impossible.
Georgiana It rained the night von Else died. There was mud on Emil's shoes the next morning.
Doctor von Niemann Have you mentioned this to anyone?
Georgiana I intend to tell Herr Brettschneider when he calls again.
Doctor von Niemann I can't believe it! Leave this with me. I want to talk to Emil before you say anything to anyone.
Georgiana The Bürgermeister should know at once.
Doctor von Niemann Yes, all in good time. Emil has been with me too long for us to jump at conclusions. Don't say anything until I tell you. Now, send Emil to me.
Georgiana Very well, Doctor.
Gussie Schnappmann That's for the neuritis. And the pepsin—that hasenpfeffer was tougher than shoe leather. And a Sweet Spirits of Nitre—that'll help; at least it won't do any harm. And ginger—that'll warm my stomach. And, now, a little bicarb of soda.
Townsman We'll get him now.
Sauer Come on, men! Come on! We've got him! He can't get away from here now! Some of you, go around that way! And if he tries to get past you, you know what to do!
Sauer Come on, men! Get over here!
Sauer Get over here!
Sauer There he is, men! Here, boys!
Sauer Hermann, you're going back to the village with us. Come on. We won't hurt you.
Hermann Gleib No! No, won't go. Hermann afraid!
Sauer Come on. You're going with us, Hermann.
Hermann Gleib No. No!
Sauer You're going with us.
Hermann Gleib No! No! No!
Sauer Come on, now. Come on men, get him!
Sauer Come on Hermann, we won't hurt you. Come on, Hermann.
Hermann Gleib No! No. No. Ahh!
Weingarten Come, that settles him!
Townsman Yes, let's go. We've got to go down below.
Sauer Hey!
Sauer We've got to make certain.
Townsman I won't go down there.
Sauer Nobody asked you to. I'll go myself.
Townsman Can you see him?
Sauer He's on a ledge about 50 feet down. I'll get a rope. We've got to make certain, I tell you.
Doctor von Niemann You must be careful, Emil. Very careful.
Doctor von Niemann No! It must be, it must be! She's no better than the rest. I've got to go on.
Gussie Schnappmann Oh, it's you, Doctor. Good evening.
Ruth Bertin I'm sorry to have to disturb you, Doctor, but we simply couldn't make Georgiana hear the bell.
Doctor von Niemann That's quite all right, my dear. Georgiana is becoming careless, very careless.
Gussie Schnappmann Yes, I've noticed that, too. In my opinion, she has negana. That's sleeping sickness. You know the symptoms, Doctor. At first, I thought it was creeping paralysis, so I stuck a pin in her leg to see. And there was a splendid reaction of the reflex motor nerves.
Ruth Bertin Why, Auntie.
Gussie Schnappmann Oh, you're shocked? So was she.
Doctor von Niemann Won't you join me in some coffee?
Karl Brettschneider Yes, thanks, Doctor. We will. There are a few questions I'd like to ask you about.
Gussie Schnappmann About blood and murders and vampires, I suppose.
Karl Brettschneider Yes, I'm afraid so.
Gussie Schnappmann Well, so am I. Well, goodnight. If such a thing is possible, I'm going to bed.
Doctor von Niemann Ah, won't you join us too, Frau Schnappmann?
Gussie Schnappmann Coffee at this hour of the night? No, thank you. I'm going to stick to my monoacid ester sylisonic salad—acid, Doctor, acid. Goodnight.
Doctor von Niemann What's the news in the village, Karl? Have they located Hermann yet?
Karl Brettschneider No, not a trace of him. I hate to think of that poor misfit being hunted down like a dog. You know, I simply can't bring myself to believe in that vampire theory.
Doctor von Niemann Here, will you pour, Ruth?
Ruth Bertin Certainly.
Doctor von Niemann I know, Karl. Our saner, calmer judgment tells us that such things can't be, and yet...here, for instance, in this ponderous tome are cited 1,001 phobias and complexes that human beings are heir to. Some of them are strange, more untenable even than werewolves and vampires. Yeah, could I have some more please?
Ruth Bertin You drink entirely too much coffee.
Doctor von Niemann It's my one weakness, and also my excuse for tolerating Georgiana's laxity in other things. She does know how to make good coffee. Thank you. She brings it to me every night at exactly 10 o'clock. And when I've drunk it all, then I know it's time to quit.
Ruth Bertin Yes, and eat breakfast so you can have more coffee.
Doctor von Niemann No.
Gussie Schnappmann Georgiana, you mustn't lie like that.
Gussie Schnappmann You'll get yourself a torticollis—you know, stiff neck. Georgiana? Ahh!
Ruth Bertin That was Auntie!
Ruth Bertin Auntie!
Gussie Schnappmann Oh, my god! I'm all right. I'm all right now. I was...
Karl Brettschneider Emil, help Frau Schnappmann to her room.
Gussie Schnappmann My silly imagination. I imagined I saw Georgia-... Ahh!
Karl Brettschneider The same two wounds, Doctor.
Doctor von Niemann And my last words to her were angry ones—a petulant reprimand for being late with my coffee.
Karl Brettschneider What time was that?
Doctor von Niemann About two or three minutes after 10.
Karl Brettschneider She's been dead then about 45 minutes.
Karl Brettschneider Bloodless, like the rest.
Karl Brettschneider It passes all belief!
Karl Brettschneider Ruth's aunt saw Hermann Gleib in the garden this morning. Could it be that he...
Karl Brettschneider You were the first one here. What happened?
Emil I was in my room reading. My door was open. I must have dozed off for a minute or so, because I awoke to hear Frau Schnappmann scream.
Karl Brettschneider You say your door was open?
Emil Yes, my room was very poorly ventilated.
Karl Brettschneider And you saw nothing? Heard nothing unusual?
Emil Nothing.
Doctor von Niemann Karl?
Karl Brettschneider What is it?
Doctor von Niemann This crucifix belonged to Martha.
Doctor von Niemann See who it is, Emil.
Karl Brettschneider Can you positively identify this as belonging to Martha?
Doctor von Niemann Without a doubt. I saw it in her room the night she died.
Karl Brettschneider How in the world did it get here?
Doctor von Niemann Hermann Gleib was in her room. He had that crucifix in his hands. And Hermann was here, today.
Karl Brettschneider He may be here now, for all we know.
Ruth Bertin Who is it?
Karl Brettschneider Karl.
Ruth Bertin Oh.
Karl Brettschneider How is she?
Ruth Bertin She's had a real shock this time, but she'll be all right. I'm putting her to bed.
Karl Brettschneider Leave her there. Don't let her out of this room, and don't you leave it either.
Ruth Bertin Why, what do you mean?
Karl Brettschneider It looks as if Hermann Gleib is the killer, after all. It's possible he may be hiding here in the castle.
Ruth Bertin What makes you think so?
Karl Brettschneider I'll tell you later. Stay in your room, and keep your door locked.
Ruth Bertin Don't worry about that.
Gussie Schnappmann I heard every word he said, and I don't think there's any use of them searching for Hermann. They should look for a dog, a human-faced dog.
Ruth Bertin Auntie, the doors and windows are all locked. There's nothing to be afraid of now.
Gussie Schnappmann Why, who said I was afraid? I'm not a bit afraid.
Ruth Bertin No, of course you're not afraid, but you must get some rest.
Gussie Schnappmann Rest in this awful place? With dog-faced Hermanns and human-faced bats and blood and murders and vampires?
Doctor von Niemann Find anything, Karl?
Karl Brettschneider There's an unbroken cobweb in that window. If Hermann did it, he came through the door.
Doctor von Niemann He must have. And yet, I don't understand how he could find his way up here without us hearing him. Yet Emil was asleep, and I was in the library. Yes, he could've done it. The facts all point to it. What was it, Emil?
Emil The Bürgermeister. He has news for Herr Brettschneider about Hermann.
Bürgermeister Gustave Schoen Pardon the intrusion, Doctor. Pardon the intrusion. I knew Karl was here, and I thought you wouldn't mind if I ran in to tell him the news.
Karl Brettschneider About Hermann?
Bürgermeister Gustave Schoen Yes. He fell into the Devil's Well, in the cave.
Karl Brettschneider He's dead?
Bürgermeister Gustave Schoen Dead as a doornail. This ends our troubles, Karl. The vampire's dead. I can feel it in my bones.
Karl Brettschneider Hm, well, your bones may be wrong. What time did this happen?
Bürgermeister Gustave Schoen Quite early, about 9 o'clock. The cave is nearly two hours from here. That's why we didn't hear it sooner.
Karl Brettschneider Well, it may interest you to know that there's been another death, after your vampire died.
Bürgermeister Gustave Schoen Ooh!
Karl Brettschneider Doctor von Niemann's housekeeper, right here in her own room.
Bürgermeister Gustave Schoen Mother of mercy! What are we going to do?
Doctor von Niemann But a natural death wouldn't kill a vampire, Karl. You know the accepted theory—a stake driven through the heart?
Karl Brettschneider Oh, yes, that's the theory all right.
Bürgermeister Gustave Schoen But...but...
Karl Brettschneider But what?
Bürgermeister Gustave Schoen But they did. They drove a stake through his heart.
Karl Brettschneider Good god, are we living in the Middle Ages?
Bürgermeister Gustave Schoen It wasn't through my sanction, Karl. But Sauer did it. He told me so himself.
Karl Brettschneider Well, that ends the vampire theory as far as I'm concerned. Hermann Gleib died in the accepted fashion for killing a vampire. Oh, no, there's some human agency at work here, Doctor—a madman, who kills to satisfy some violent, sadistic urge.
Bürgermeister Gustave Schoen Yes, you're right, Karl. I've been a fool, a superstitious fool.
Karl Brettschneider Did they leave his body in the cave?
Bürgermeister Gustave Schoen Yes. Yes, they did.
Karl Brettschneider Well, in view of what's happened, don't you think you owe him a decent burial?
Bürgermeister Gustave Schoen You're right. In view of what has happened, we do owe him that, Karl. I'll see to it at once, this very instant. And I'll make arrangements for Georgiana's removal to the morgue. Goodnight, Doctor. Pardon the intrusion.
Doctor von Niemann Goodnight, Gustave.
Bürgermeister Gustave Schoen Pardon the intrusion.
Karl Brettschneider Well, here I am, just where I started weeks ago. There isn't a single theory that doesn't lead straight into a stone wall. I've jested about this vampire business because my better judgment told me it was a lot of nonsense. Then I had reached the point where I was willing to accept even that, because it seemed to satisfy the equation.
Doctor von Niemann All of it was a bit superstitious.
Karl Brettschneider I don't know which way to turn—where to look, what to look for! Why should anyone want human blood? Why? Why?
Doctor von Niemann Calm yourself, Karl.
Karl Brettschneider Calm myself? Calm myself? With all these unsolved murders staring me in the face, and no solution in sight?
Karl Brettschneider How much blood is there in the human body, Doctor?
Doctor von Niemann About six liters approximately.
Karl Brettschneider Can you think of any purpose for which that amount of blood might be used?
Doctor von Niemann No, not even in transfusions.
Karl Brettschneider That's the point which stops me. There isn't any other use for human blood. Damn. Murderers leave clues. And these atrocities are murders, Doctor. Those simple fools in the village can believe what they like, but you and I are sane thinking people, and you know and I know, Doctor, that these are murders! The last one was done here, in this very house, right under this roof. All right, I'll start here. I'm going over every foot of this place, both inside and out. Nobody, sane or insane, is clever enough to get away with murder without leaving a clue of some sort. And I'm going to find that clue!
Doctor von Niemann Now, come, Karl. You mustn't let your nerves run away with you. Here, these...
POISON SLEEPING TABLETS
Doctor von Niemann These will help to give you a good night's sleep. If there are any clues, they'll be here in the morning when your nerves are calm and your...your mind is clear. Take my advice and go home and rest.
Ruth Bertin I imagined 1,000 demons were after me as I came down those stairs.
Karl Brettschneider Ruth, didn't I tell you to stay in your room?
Ruth Bertin Yes, but I wanted the doctor to come up and quiet Auntie. You know, it isn't her imagination this time.
Doctor von Niemann Of course, Ruth, I'll come right away. Take my advice, young man. Go home and go to bed.
Ruth Bertin Goodnight, Karl.
Karl Brettschneider Goodnight, Ruth.
Doctor von Niemann Goodnight, Karl.
Karl Brettschneider Goodnight, Doctor.
Doctor von Niemann If his lights are on, you must wait, Emil—wait until he has gone to bed.
Doctor von Niemann Handle him as you did the others, Emil. You are strong, very strong. I am waiting for you—waiting for you to bring him to the laboratory.
Ruth Bertin You! You're the one! What mad thing are you doing?
Doctor von Niemann Mad? Is one who has solved the secret of life to be considered mad? Life, created in the laboratory! No mere crystalline growth, but tissue—living, growing tissue. Life that moves, pulsates, and demands food for its continued growth! You shudder in horror. So did I the first time. But what will a few lives be weighed in the balance against the achievement of biological science? Think of it. I have lifted the veil. I have created life—arrested the secret of life from life. Now do you understand? For the lives of those who have gone before, I have created life!
Ruth Bertin I'll tell Karl.
Ruth Bertin You may, for tonight, Karl's name will be added to yours, and all of those whom this achievement will immortalize.
Karl Brettschneider I didn't take your sleeping tablets, Doctor.
Doctor von Niemann Emil brought them here. He's the one who murdered them.
Karl Brettschneider Stay where you are. You'll have a chance to tell everything, Doctor.
Emil I'll take care of von Niemann! Get her out of here!
Karl Brettschneider You stay here.
Karl Brettschneider Von Niemann and Emil.
Gussie Schnappmann Doctor! Doctor von Niemann!
Ruth Bertin Karl, she mustn't see them.
Gussie Schnappmann Where is Doctor von Niemann? I must see him immediately.
Ruth Bertin Aunt Gussie, you can't, he...he can't be disturbed.
Gussie Schnappmann Oh, but I must see him, I simply must. That hydrous magnesium sulfate he gave me is affecting me most peculiarly. If you'll pardon me?
Karl Brettschneider Hydrous magnesium sulfate...why, that's Epsom salts.
THE END
This work is in the public domain in the United States because it was legally published within the United States (or the United Nations Headquarters in New York subject to Section 7 of the United States Headquarters Agreement) between 1929 and 1977 (inclusive) without a copyright notice.
The longest-living author of this work died in 1964, so this work is in the public domain in countries and areas where the copyright term is the author's life plus 59 years or less. This work may be in the public domain in countries and areas with longer native copyright terms that apply the rule of the shorter term to foreign works.
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