OpenLLM-France/wikimedia huggingface dataset:
# Grimm Tales Made Gay/How Rudeness and Kindness Were Justly Rewarded

Once on a time, long years ago  (Just when I quite forget), Two maidens lived beside the Po,  One blonde and one brunette. The blonde one’s character was mild, From morning until night she smiled, Whereas the one whose hair was brown Did little else than pine and frown.  (I think one ought to draw the line  At girls who always frown and pine!)
The blonde one learned to play the harp,  Like all accomplished dames, And trained her voice to take C sharp  As well as Emma Eames; Made baskets out of scented grass, And paper-weights of hammered brass, And lots of other odds and ends For gentleman and lady friends.  (I think it takes a deal of sense  To manufacture gifts for gents!)
The dark one wore an air of gloom,  Proclaimed the world a bore, And took her breakfast in her room  Three mornings out of four. With crankiness she seemed imbued, And everything she said was rude: She sniffed, and sneered, and, what is more, When very much provoked, she swore!  (I think that I could never care  For any girl who’d learned to swear!)
One day the blonde was striding past  A forest, all alone, When all at once her eyes she cast  Upon a wrinkled crone, Who tottered near with shaking knees, And said: “A penny, if you please!” And you will learn with some surprise This was a fairy in disguise!  (I think it must be hard to know  A fairy who’s incognito!)
The maiden filled her trembling palms  With coinage of the realm. The fairy said: “Take back your alms!  My heart they overwhelm. Henceforth at every word shall slip A pearl or ruby from your lip!” And, when the girl got home that night, — She found the fairy’s words were right!  (I think there are not many girls  Whose words are worth their weight in pearls!)
It happened that the cross brunette,  Ten minutes later, came Along the self-same road, and met  That bent and wrinkled dame, Who asked her humbly for a sou. The girl replied: “Get out with you!” The fairy cried: “Each word you drop, A toad from out your mouth shall hop!”  (I think that nothing incommodes  One’s speech like uninvited toads!)
And so it was, the cheerful blonde  Lived on in joy and bliss, And grew pecunious, beyond  The dreams of avarice And to a nice young man was wed, And I have often heard it said No other man who ever walked Most loved his wife when most she talked!  (I think this very fact, forsooth,  Goes far to prove I tell the truth!)
The cross brunette the fairy’s joke  By hook or crook survived, Put still at every word she spoke  An ugly toad arrived, Until at last she had to come To feigning she was wholly dumb, Whereat the suitors swarmed around, And soon a wealthy mate she found.  (I think nobody ever knew  The happier husband of the two!)
The Moral of the tale is: Bah!  Nous avons change tout cela. No clear idea I hope to strike  Of what our nicest girl is like, But she whose best young man I am  Is not an oyster, nor a clam!
# Grimm Tales Made Gay/How Thomas a Maid from a Dragon Released

Though Philip the Second Of France was reckoned  No coward, his breath came short When they told him a dragon As big as a wagon  Was waiting below in the court! A dragon so long, and so  wide, and so fat, That he couldn’t get in at  the door to chat: The king couldn’t leave him Outside and grieve him, He had to receive him  Upon the mat,
The dragon bowed nicely, And very concisely  He stated the reason he’d called: He made the disclosure With frigid composure.  King Philip was simply appalled! He demanded for eating,  a fortnight apart, The monarch’s ten daughters,  all dear to his heart. “And now you’ll produce,” he Concluded, “the juicy And succulent Lucie  By way of start!”
King Philip was pliant, And far from defiant  — “And servile,” no doubt you retort ! — But if you struck a snag on A bottle-green dragon,  Who filled up two-thirds of your court, And curled up his tail on And made your piazza  your new tin roof,  groan under his hoof, Would you threaten and thunder, Or just knuckle under Completely, I wonder,  If put to proof?
By way of a truce, he Brought out little Lucie  And watched her conducted away, But all of the others Were out with their brothers  Thus gaining a little delay, He promised through heralds  sent west and east, His crown, and his kingdom,  and last, not least, His daughter so sightly To any one knightly Who’d come and politely  Wipe out that beast!
For love of the charmer, Arrayed in his armor,  Each suitor for glory who yearned, Would gallantly hasten, The dragon to chasten,  But none of them ever returned! When the dragon had eaten  some sixteen score He hung up this sign on  his cavern door, Whereat he lay pronely In majesty lonely: There’s Standing Room Only  For Three Knights More!
A slim adolescent, His beard only crescent,  Rode up at this stage of the game To where the old sinner Lay gorged with his dinner,  And breathing out torrents of flame. He gathered a tip from  the flaunting sign, And took his position  the fourth in line, Until, as foreboded, By food incommoded, The dragon exploded  At half-past nine.
The king was delighted At first when he sighted  The victor, but then in dismay Regretted his promise. The stripling was Thomas,  His Majesty’s valet-de-pied! He asked him at once:  “Will you compromise?” But Thomas looked straight  in his master’s eyes, And answered severely: “I see your game clearly, And scorn it sincerely.  Hand out the prize!”
Not long did he linger Before on the finger  Of Lucie he fitted a ring: A month or two later They made him dictator,  In place of the elderly king: He was lauded by pulpit,  and boomed by press, And no one had ever  a chance to guess, Beholding this hero Who ruled like a Nero, His valor was zero,  or something less.
The Moral: And still from Nice to Calais Discretion’s the better part of— —valets!
# Grimm Tales Made Gay/How Jack Made the Giants Uncommonly Sore

Of all the ill-fated Boys ever created  Young Jack was the wretchedest lad: An emphatic, erratic, Dogmatic fanatic  Was foisted upon him as dad! From the time he could walk, And before he could talk,  His wearisome training began, On a highly barbarian, Disciplinarian, Nearly Tartarean  Plan!
He taught him some Raleigh, And some of Macaulay,  Till all of “Horatius” he knew, And the drastic, sarcastic, Fantastic, scholastic  Philippics of “Junius,” too. He made him learn lots Of the poems of Watts,  And frequently said he ignored, On principle, any son’s Title to benisons Till he’d learned Tennyson’s  “Maud.”
“For these are the giants Of thought and of science,”  He said in his positive way: “So weigh them, obey them, Display them, and lay them  To heart in your infancy’s day!” Jack made no reply, But he said on the sly  An eloquent word, that had come From a quite indefensible, Most reprehensible, But indispensable  Chum.
By the time he was twenty Jack had such a plenty  Of books and paternal advice, Though seedy and needy, Indeed he was greedy  For vengeance, whatever the price! In the editor’s seat Of a critical sheet  He found the revenge that he sought; And, with sterling appliance of Mind, wrote defiance of All of the giants of  Thought.
He’d thunder and grumble At high and at humble  Until he became, in a while, Mordacious, pugnacious, Rapacious. Good gracious!  They called him the Yankee Carlyle! But he never took rest On his quarrelsome quest  Of the giants, both mighty and small. He slated, distorted them, Hanged them and quartered them, Till he had slaughtered them  All.
And this is The Moral that lies in the verse:  If you have a go farther, you’re apt to fare  worse. (When you turn it around it is different rather: —  You’re not apt to go worse if you have a fair  father!)
# Grimm Tales Made Gay/How Much Fortunatus Could Do with a Cap

Fortunatus, a fisherman Dane, Set out on a sudden for Spain,  Because, runs the story,  He’d met with a hoary  Mysterious sorcerer chap,  Who, trouble to save him,  Most thoughtfully gave him  A magical traveling cap. I barely believe that the story is true, But here’s what that cap was reported to do.
Suppose you were sitting at home, And you wished to see Paris or Rome,  You’d pick up that bonnet,  You’d carefully don it,  The name of the city you’d call,  And the very next minute  By Jove, you were in it, Without having started at all! One moment you sauntered on upper Broad-  way, And the next on the Corso or rue de la Paix!
Why, it beat every journey of Cook’s, Knocked spots out of Baedeker’s books!  He stepped from his doorway  Direct into Norway,  He hopped in a trice to Ceylon,  He saw Madagascar,  Went round by Alaska,  And called on a girl in Luzon: If they said she’d be down in a moment or  two, He took, while he waited, a peek at Peru!
He could wake up at eight in Siam, Take his tub, if he wanted, in Guam.  Eat breakfast in Kansas,  And lunch in Matanzas,  Go out for a walk in Brazil,  Take tea in Madeira,  Dine on the Riviera,  And smoke his cigar in Seville, Go out to the theatre in Vladivostok, And retire in New York at eleven o’clock!
Every tongue he could readily speak: French, German, Italian, Greek,  Norwegian, Bulgarian,  Turkish, Bavarian,  Japanese, Hindustanee,  Russian and Mexican!  He was a lexicon,  Such as you seldom will see. His knowledge linguistic gave Ollendorff fits, And brought a hot flush to the face of Berlitz!
He would bow in an intimate way To Menelik and to Loubet,  He was frequently beckoned,  By William the Second,  A word of advice to receive,  He talked with bravado  About the Mikado,  King Oscar, Oom Paul, the Khedive, King Victor Emmanuel Second, the Shah, King Edward the Seventh, Kwang Su, and the  Czar!
But what did he get from it all? His wife used to wait in the hall!  When this wandering mortal  Set foot on the portal,  She always appeared on the scene,  And, far from ideally,  Remarked: “Well, I really  Would like to know where you have been!” Now what is the good of a wandering life, If you have to tell all that you do to your  wife?
She’d indulge in a copious cry, She’d remark she’d undoubtedly die,  Or, like many another,  Go back to her mother,  And what would the world think of that!  She only grew pleasant,  When offered a present  Of gloves or a gown or a hat: And more than his talisman saved him in fare Fortunatus expended in putting things square!
And The Moral is easily said: Like our hero, you’re certain to find, When such a cap goes on a head, Retribution will follow behind!
# Grimm Tales Made Gay/How Rumplestilz Held Out in Vain for a Bonus

In Germany there lived an earl  Who had a charming niece: And never gave the timid girl  A single moment’s peace! Whatever low and menial task  His fancy flitted through, He did not hesitate to ask  That shrinking child to do. (I see with truly honest shame you Are blushing, and I do not blame you. A tale like this the feelings softens, And brings the tears, as does “Two Orphans.”)
She had to wash the windows, and  She had to scrub the floors, She had to lend a willing hand  To fifty other chores: She gave the dog his exercise,  She read the earl the news, She ironed all his evening ties,  And polished all his shoes, She cleaned the tins that filled the dairy, She cut the claws of the canary, And then, at night, with manner winsome, When coal was wanted, carried in some!
But though these tasks were quite enough, He thought them all too few,  And so her uncle, rude and rough, Invented something new.  He took her to a little room, Her willingness to tax,  And pointed out a broken loom And half a ton of flax,  Observing: “Spin six pairs of trousers!” His haughty manner seemed to rouse hers. She met his scornful glances proudly— And for an answer whistled loudly!
But when the earl went down the stair  She yielded to her fears. Gave way at last to grim despair,  And melted into tears: When suddenly, from out the wall,  As if he felt at home, There pounced a singularly small  And much distorted gnome. He smiled a smile extremely vapid, And set to work in fashion rapid; No time for resting he deducted, And soon the trousers were constructed.
The girl observed: “How very nice  To help me out this way!” The gnome replied: “A certain price  Of course you’ll have to pay. I’ll call to-morrow afternoon,  My due reward to claim, And then you’ll sing another tune  Unless you guess my name!” He indicated with a gesture The pile of newly fashioned vesture: His eyes on hers a moment centered, And then he went, as he had entered.
As by this tale you have been grieved  And heartily distressed, Kind sir, you will be much relieved  To know his name she guessed: But if I do not tell the same,  Pray count it not a crime— I’ve tried my best, and for that name  I can’t find any rhyme! Yet spare me from remarks injurious: I will not leave you foiled and furious. If something must proclaim the answer, And I cannot, the title can, sir!
 The Moral is: All said and done,  There’s nothing new beneath the sun,  And many times before, a title  Was incapacity’s requital!
# Grimm's Household Tales, Volume 2/The Duration of Life

Tale 176. Notes
176.—THE DURATION OF LIFE.
When God had created the world and was about to fix the length of each creature's life, the ass came and asked, "Lord, how long shall I live?" "Thirty years," replied God; "does that content thee?" "Ah, Lord," answered the ass, "that is a long time. Think of my painful existence! To carry heavy burdens from morning to night, to drag sacks of corn to the mill, that others may eat bread, to be cheered and refreshed with nothing but blows and kicks. Relieve me of a portion of this long time." Then God had pity on him and relieved him of eighteen years. The ass went away comforted, and the dog appeared. "How long wouldst thou like to live?" said God to him. "Thirty years are too many for the ass, but thou wilt be satisfied with that." "Lord," answered the dog, "is that thy will? Consider how I shall have to run, my feet will never hold out so long, and when I have once lost my voice for barking, and my teeth for biting, what will be left for me to do but run from one corner to another and growl?" God saw that he was right, and released him from twelve years of life. Then came the monkey, "Thou wilt certainly live thirty years willingly?" said the Lord to him. "Thou hast no need to work as the ass and the dog have to do, and wilt always enjoy thyself." "Ah! Lord," he answered, "it may seem as if that were the case, but it is quite different. When it rains porridge I have no spoon. I am always to play merry pranks, and make faces which force people to laugh, and if they give me an apple, and I bite into it, why it is sour! How often sadness hides itself behind mirth! I shall never be able to hold out for thirty years." God was gracious and took off ten.
At last man appeared, joyous, healthy and vigorous, and begged God to appoint his time for him. "Thirty years shalt thou live," said the Lord. "Is that enough for thee?" "What a short time," cried man, "when I have built my house and my fire burns on my own hearth; when I have planted trees which blossom and bear fruit, and am just intending to enjoy my life, I am to die! O ​Lord, lengthen my time." "I will add to it the ass's eighteen years," said God. "That is not enough," replied the man. "Thou shalt also have the dog's twelve years." "Still too little!" "Well, then," said God, "I will give thee the monkey's ten years also, but more thou shalt not have." The man went away, but was not satisfied.
So man lives seventy years. The first thirty are his human years, which are soon gone; then is he healthy, merry, works with pleasure, and is glad of his life. Then follow the ass's eighteen years, when one burden after another is laid on him, he has to carry the corn which feeds others, and blows and kicks are the reward of his faithful services. Then come the dog's twelve years, when he lies in the corner, and growls and has no longer any teeth to bite with, and when this time is over the monkey's ten years form the end. Then man is weak-headed and foolish, does silly things, and becomes the jest of the children.
# Grimm's Household Tales, Volume 2/The Flail from Heaven

112.—THE FLAIL FROM HEAVEN.
A countryman was once going out to plough with a pair of oxen. When he got to the field, both the animals' horns began to grow, and went on growing, and when he wanted to go home they were so big that the oxen could not get through the gateway for them. By good luck a butcher came by just then, and he delivered them over ​to him, and made the bargain in this way, that he should take the butcher a measure of turnip-seed, and then the butcher was to count him out a Brabant thaler for every seed. I call that well sold! The peasant now went home, and carried the measure of turnip-seed to him on his back. On the way, however, he lost one seed out of the bag. The butcher paid him justly as agreed on, and if the peasant had not lost the seed, he would have had one thaler the more. In the meantime, when he went on his way back, the seed had grown into a tree which reached up to the sky. Then thought the peasant, "As thou hast the chance, thou must just see what the angels are doing up there above, and for once have them before thine eyes." So he climbed up, and saw that the angels above were threshing oats, and he looked on. While he was thus watching them, he observed that the tree on which he was standing, was beginning to totter; he peeped down, and saw that some one was just going to cut it down. "If I were to fall down from hence it would be a bad thing," thought he, and in his necessity he did not know how to save himself better than by taking the chaff of the oats which lay there in heaps, and twisting a rope of it. He likewise snatched a hoe and a flail which were lying about in heaven, and let himself down by the rope. But he came down on the earth exactly in the middle of a deep, deep hole. So it was a real piece of luck that he had brought the hoe, for he hoed himself a flight of steps with it, and mounted up, and took the flail with him as a token of his truth, so that no one could have any doubt of his story.
# Grimm's Household Tales, Volume 2/The Ditmarsch Tale of Wonders

159.—THE DITMARSCH TALE OF WONDERS.
I will tell you something. I saw two roasted fowls flying; they flew quickly and had their breasts turned to heaven and their backs to hell, and an anvil and a mill-stone swam across the Rhine prettily, slowly, and gently, and a frog sat on the ice at Whitsuntide and ate a ploughshare. Three fellows who wanted to catch a hare, went on crutches and stilts; one of them was deaf, the second blind, the third dumb, and the fourth could not stir a step. Do you want to know how it was done? First, the blind man saw the hare running across the field, the dumb one called to the lame one, and the lame one seized it by the neck.
There were certain men who wished to sail on dry land, and they set their sails in the wind, and sailed away over great fields. Then they sailed over a high mountain, and there they were miserably drowned. A crab was chasing a hare which was running away at full speed, and high up on the roof lay a cow which had climbed up there. In that country the flies are as big as the goats are here. Open the window, that the lies may fly out.
# Grimm's Household Tales, Volume 2/The Ear of Corn

Tale 194. Notes
194.—THE EAR OF CORN.
In former times, when God himself still walked the earth, the fruitfulness of the soil was much greater that it is now; then, the ears of corn did not bear fifty or sixty, but four or five hundred-fold. Then the corn grew from the bottom to the very top of the stalk, and according to the length of the stalk was the length of the ear. Men however are so made, that when they are too well off they no longer value the blessings which come from God, but grow indifferent and careless. One day a woman was passing by a corn-field when her little child, who was running beside her, fell into a puddle, and dirtied her frock. On this the mother tore up a handful of the beautiful ears of corn, and cleaned the frock with them.
When the Lord, who just then came by, saw that, he was angry, and said, "Henceforth shall the stalks of corn bear no more ears; men are no longer worthy of heavenly gifts." The by-standers who heard this, were terrified, and fell on their knees and prayed that he would still leave something on the stalks, even if the people were undeserving of it, for the sake of the innocent birds which would otherwise have to starve. The Lord, who foresaw their suffering, had pity on them, and granted the request. So the ears were left as they now grow.
# Harmon v. Brucker

* related portals: Supreme Court of the United States.
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## Dissenting Opinion

    Clark
United States Supreme Court
355 U.S. 579
Harmon v. Brucker
Argued: Jan. 14, 15, 1958. --- Decided: March 3, 1958
Mr. David I. Shapiro, New York City, for petitioner Harmon.
Mr. Victor Rabinowitz, New York City, for petitioner Abramowitz.
Mr. Donald B. MacGuineas, Washington, D.C., for respondent.
PER CURIAM.

## Notes

This work is in the public domain in the United States because it is a work of the United States federal government (see 17 U.S.C. 105).
Public domainPublic domainfalsefalse
# Harmonium

* Search for titles containing or beginning with: "Harmonium."
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This is a disambiguation page. It lists works that share the same title. If an article link referred you here, please consider editing it to point directly to the intended page.

### Encyclopaedia articles

* "Harmonium," in A Dictionary of Music and Musicians, (ed.) by George Grove, London: MacMillan & Co., Ltd. (1900)
* "Harmonium," in The New International Encyclopædia, New York: Dodd, Mead and Co. (1905)
* "Harmonium," in Encyclopædia Britannica (11th ed., 1911)