# The young man's guide/Part 4

PART FOURTH
At the Parting of the Ways
In life's bright morn I see thee depart
I see thee go with a trembling heart;
Farewell, dear Youth, so joyous and free,
God's blessing ever abide with thee.
When thou dost stand where the ways divide
May thy Angel-guardian be at thy side;
God grant thou may'st choose the narrow way,
And from it may thy footsteps never stray.
'Wenn Du am Scheidewege stehst,
Und Pflicht und Wunsch den Kopf verwirren,
Du wirst im Pfad nur selten irren,
Wenn Du den Unbequemsten gehst."
- F. W. Weber, Gedichte.
Whither Goest Thou?
LXXXII. The Decision
1.Let us suppose that you are on a walking tour in a neighborhood as yet unknown to you. You come to a spot where one road leads straight before you, another to the right, and a third to the left. Is it not very important for you to know which of these three roads you ought to take in order to reach the desired goal?
You have really set out on a pilgrimage like this; for your whole life is nothing but a journey to heaven. You may possibly have already reached the crossroad, or will reach it before long; you must come to a decision, and enter upon one of these paths in life.
But which are you to choose? Life in the world, especially the marriage state, the priesthood, or the religious life? All these roads have one and the same goal - they all lead to heaven. But each has its own special and peculiar difficulties, so that not all who walk along these paths reach the goal with equal facility and with the same happiness.
Those who are really qualified to tread the path they have chosen, will reach their goal easily and happily with the help of God.
​When you arrive at the parting of the ways it is of the highest importance that you should choose the right way, that is, the state of life destined for you by God. Lay well to heart the momentous character of this decision.
2. The three states mentioned above, life in the world, or matrimony, the priesthood, or the religious life, are the only vocations, properly so called; certainly doctors, lawyers, tutors, tradesmen, artisans, farmers, and so on, apparently represent so many different vocations, to make use of an expression commonly in vogue.
But these are really no vocations in the embrace them no essentially different obligations, as in the states of matrimony, the priesthood, and the religious life; they are simply trades, occupations, professions, distinct positions in life. Now as regards the three states or vocations, properly so called, God, whose wise providence guides and orders all things, bestows upon each individual human being, an immortal soul with all the special aptitudes and capabilities which are required to lead him to the goal which he is destined to reach. When, therefore, a young man has arrived at the parting of the ways, there sounds in his ear more or less plainly, sometimes within his own heart, sometimes from an exterior voice, the call of God: "I have destined you to be the father of a family; I have thought to lay upon you the ​dignity and burden of a priest; I desire to see you lead a pious life within the walls of a convent."
Thus does the call of God sound in the ears of all men in innumerably different ways. One hears the call in his own heart from his childhood days; another hears it for the first time when the moment of decision arrives. God calls one suddenly by some extraordinary event, others again, and the greater number, by the force of circumstances and environment.
3. How immensely important therefore it is to recognize and follow this call of God. God made man to know Him, love Him, and serve Him in this world, and to be happy with Him forever in heaven; this is the final goal and highest end of all men.
The commandments also are the same everywhere and for all men; but it is not everywhere and for all men equally difficult to keep these commandments. Therefore every state is not for every one, and every one can not reach heaven with the same facility in every state.
4. If you are not destined for life in the world, for matrimony, you will scarcely be able to save your soul in the married state, you will only succeed in doing so with great difficulty. On the other hand, if you are called to the matrimonial state, to remain unmarried would place a great obstacle in your heaven-ward way.
​And if it be the will of God that you should enter a Religious Order, it would be difficult for you to work out your salvation in the world.
Therefore St. Gregory of Nazianzen says: "He who makes a mistake as to his vocation will fall from one error to another all his life long, and at the end of it may possibly even find himself deceived as to his hope of heaven."
5. It is easy to see the reason which lies at the root of this. If a young man refuses to follow the clear call of God, because to do so would involve a sacrifice, he forfeits many graces.
You have as yet perhaps not reached the parting of the ways, and years may elapse before the moment for a decision arrives. You may already be filled with anxious dread lest you should make a wrong choice, and wreck your prospects of happiness. But fear not, be of good courage! There is a sure and simple means of choosing aright. In the meantime be truly chaste and pious, and your choice cannot fail to be a happy one.
Many are the ways that here
Lead unto a higher sphere:
One thy God has traced for thee,
Best and safest that will be.
LXXXIII. Good Advice
1.When a parish priest, a director of souls, surveys the young people belonging to his flock, he asks himself with a ​heavy heart the important question: " What will become of all these who are dear tome?" A similar inquiry forces itself upon me in regard to the youthful readers of these pages. And in regard to you, who are perusing this chapter, I ask myself whether you, well meaning as you are at present, will always remain virtuous, be happy, and get to heaven at last.
I cannot tell; I can only wish it with all my heart. But one thing I do know, that it will go well with you, and that you will in all probability save your soul, if you embrace the state of life for which you are destined by God.
Therefore it is incumbent on me to do everything in my power in order to help you to make a wise choice. Therefore lay well to heart the good advice which I am now about to offer you, in view of such a choice.
2. My first piece of advice is: take counsel of yourself. But you must do this calmly, without prejudice. Your heart should resemble a delicately balanced pair of scales; you must weigh all things fairly. You must not try to discover where and how you can most speedily grow rich and enjoy the vanities and amusements of the world. A young man who should take counsel of himself in such a fashion as this, and look at things from a purely material point of view, without reference to God and to his eternal salvation, would be greatly in danger of making a bad ​choice. Therefore I beseech you not to expose yourself to any such risk.
3. Take counsel with yourself in such a manner as will enable you to say to God in a spirit of resignation: "Speak, Lord, for Thy servant heareth. I desire nothing but what is Thy will. If only I can do Thy will it is a matter of indifference to me whether I am rich or poor, whether happiness or sorrow is my portion, whether my life is full of work or spent in ease and without exertion. All this is of no consequence, if only I can please Thee, O my God, and save my soul in the end."
In this resigned frame of mind examine yourself; review your characteristics, peculiarities, and inclinations, good and bad; think over your past; notice what are your passions and temptations; consider the strength or weakness of your will. Then compare with all this the duties, difficulties, and dangers of the state of life upon which you purpose to enter. If you feel compelled to say to yourself: "When I remember the weakness of my will and the force of the temptations which assail me, I do not think that I am capable of fulfilling the duties of that state, or of overcoming the difficulties which it presents," it becomes plain that this road to heaven is too steep for you.
4. Consider your case as you would that of a friend who had similar faults and the same inclinations. One is usually more unprejudiced in regard to others than one can hope to be if the matter under consideration is of a ​personal nature. Why should you not feel the same affection for yourself as you do for a friend? Why should you not take counsel with yourself in the same manner in which you would seek to advise him? Ask yourself the question which St. Aloysius was wont to put. to himself whenever he was obliged to come to an important determination: How does this look in the light of eternity? " or " What does this count for eternity? "
Act in respect to yourself as you will wish you had done when you come to lie upon your death-bed. There can be no safer rule than this. For in the presence of death matters are viewed in their true light, and no longer seen through colored glasses. How extremely foolish it would be to embrace a state of life which would furnish cause for bitter repentance in your last hours!
5. My second piece of advice is: Take counsel with others. But who is to counsel you, and to whom ought you to listen? Here great caution is necessary; there are counselors who present themselves unasked, and to whom it would be wrong to listen. On no account lend your ear to bad Catholics, to persons who 'have no faith or who have not a good reputation. In regard to the supernatural their understanding is either darkened or extinguished altogether; 'the eyes of their mind are blind as far as the eternal truths are concerned; how, then, could they ​advise others, how point out to them the right road to heaven? There are yet other counselors to whom it would be most inadvisable to listen. I mean worldly persons, who are entirely absorbed in material things. For higher interests they have no perception; their thoughts are set upon nothing else but money, honors, and pleasures. Persons of this class usually deplore the entrance of a young man into a Religious Order.
6. Nor ought you to listen to the advice of those who have anything to gain or lose from your choice as regards the goods of this world. Finally, do not be advised by persons who know nothing about the state of life that you may be thinking of adopting, as, for instance, the religious state. Their ignorance imbues them with the most absurd ideas and vehement prejudices, in regard to such a state of life. How could they form a correct judgment?
7. From whom, then, are you to seek counsel? Holy Scripture exhorts you: "Keep continually to a wise man, who fears the Lord." It is very important to remember this when the choice of a state of life is under consideration. And why is it so? Because he who desires to give good advice must often offend this or that individual with regard to whose temporal interests the results of his advice may prove to be prejudicial. If counsel is sought from persons who fear man rather than God, what misery may not be the consequence of following their advice, since in giving it they view things from a purely human ​standpoint. As a rule, your natural advisers, given you by God, are your parents. But there are exceptional cases in which they rank among the evil counselors I have enumerated above; and in these instances their advice can not be relied upon.
8. Under all circumstances your best adviser is plainly your confessor. You ought not only to ask his advice, but faithfully to follow it. He knows you as no one can know you, except God alone; he knows your good and bad qualities and inclinations. Therefore do not, in your youthful folly, be influenced by the fear that his advice will not coincide with your own wishes. Rather give thanks to God that you have at least one friend whose intentions are pure, whose motives are disinterested, and who will be able to prevent you from taking a false step. Consult your confessor and follow his advice; it will be for your good. The Holy Ghost refers to the priest, the confessor, when He exhorts you in the words I have quoted above: " Keep continually to a wise man, who possesseth the fear of the Lord."
LXXXIV. Effectual Means
1.The right choice of a state of life is certainly a great desideratum, since it is a matter of so much consequence in relation to ​your success and happiness. In order to make a happy choice, follow the good advice offered you in the preceding chapter, and make use of the effectual means, which I am about to point out to you.
2. In the first place, keep your heart constantly directed toward heaven. Have but one desire, namely, to know and to do the will of God. God will then bestow his grace upon you, and you will be certain to make a wise choice. No one ought to wait for an extraordinary call, such as the apostles and many great saints received. However, if you keep your heart constantly directed toward God, He will enlighten you with His grace. He will give you prudent counselors, and so ordain external circumstances that you may be led as if by the hand of your guardian angel to the state of life God intends for you.
Truly the ways of God are wonderful and manifold. Sometimes He impresses on the heart of a young child a desire for a particular state. Consequently, later on in life there can arise no question as to making a choice, the question having already been decided. To others He signifies His will only when a choice has to be made; and these often enter with joy of spirit into a state for which they had long experienced a rooted aversion.
3. In the second place, keep your soul pure. Very much - everything, indeed - depends upon this. The brighter and more transparent is the glass of a window, the more readily do the rays of the sun penetrate into the room; but the dimmer the glass, the darker will the apartment be. The soul may be compared to glass, to a mirror, into which the beams of divine grace ​shine, and in which they are reflected. If you desire to be enlightened from on high in your choice of a state of life, keep your heart clean, preserve therein the bright light of innocence. If this light is obscured or extinguished by sin, delay not to rekindle it by means of contrition and confession.
4. In the third place, be diligent in prayer. From what has already been said you must plainly perceive that prayer is of the utmost importance in choosing a state of life. For, on the one hand, you seek to choose the state of life which will best promote your eternal salvation; on the other, the world, the flesh, and the devil strive to decoy you into taking the wrong road.
There are two epochs in the life of every individual when the devil lays snares for him with particular cunning. The first is when he ceases to be a child; then comes the crisis, the critical period when the result of previous training will show in the innocence and purity of the youth or maiden, or the reverse be unhappily the case. I believe this critical period ha3 already passed with you; I confidently hope you have successfully stood the test and preserved your innocence.
But with yet greater cunning and force will the devil attack you either now or a few years hence when you come to choose a state of life. Should he succeed in inducing you to take the wrong road, he will expect to emerge victorious from your final, death-bed struggle. Therefore, my dear young friend, pray, pray! Pray for light, that the mists may disperse and the road of life stretch clearly before you; pray for strength to resist your passions whatever sacrifices it may cost you; pray simply that you ​may know and do the will of God.
5. In the fourth place, receive frequently and worthily the sacraments of Penance and of the Altar. These sacraments will maintain the purity of your soul, and the Giver of grace will descend into your heart with His light and strength. After each communion entreat Our Lord, with earnestness and confidence, to teach you what are the designs of His sacred Heart in regard to you, and to strengthen you to make any sacrifice that may be necessary. And on your communion days give some time to serious reflection. Imagine that you are stretched upon your death-bed. Ask yourself if you were in that awful hour what state of life you would wish you had chosen. Would it not be a cause of bitter regret if you had acted in accordance with your own self-will, instead of following the advice of your confessor?
6. I can not refrain from mentioning one more means for arriving at a right decision, namely, a true, filial, confiding love and devotion
    o Mary. On the present occasion I will only
make two brief remarks in regard to this devotion. If you desire wisdom and enlightenment concerning the choice of a state of life, the surest way to obtain it is through Mary, for she is "Sedes sapientiae," the "Seat of wisdom." And if you wish to attain eternal salvation in the state which you may choose, the surest way to realize this is through Mary, for, as a great saint tells us, "a true servant of Mary can never be lost."
7. Do not imagine that thoughts like these are suited only for a young man who is about to enter the cloister. These reflections are not intended for this one or that one, but for all who ​desire to choose aright so as to insure their eternal salvation.
As you ought to beware of rashness in choosing a state of life, so ought you to guard against over-anxiety. Do not lose heart in presence of the momentous decision. Make use of the means I have pointed out to you; look constantly toward Heaven. Keep your soul pure; be diligent in prayer; frequently approach the sacraments; practise devotion to Mary; regard her as your Mother; and look with cheerful confidence into the future. Eternal peace and joy follow the earthly struggle. The way of the cross leads to. the crown of immortal glory.
Gentle Star of Ocean!
Portal of the sky!
Ever virgin mother
Of the Lord most high!
Break the captive's fetters;
Light on blindness pour;
All our ills expelling,
Every bliss implore.
Show thyself a mother;
Offer Him our sighs,
Who, for us incarnate,
Did not thee despise.
Virgin of all virgins!
To thy shelter take us I
Gentlest of the gentle!
Chaste and gentle make me.
Still, as on we journey,
Help our weak endeavor;
Till with thee and Jesus
We rejoice forever.
The Married State
LXXXV. Ought You to Marry?
1.All are three states of life, namely, the Priesthood, the Religious state, and the Married state, are, as I have frequently remarked, ordained by God; but every state is not for every one, and it is not a matter of indifference in the sight of God which state is chosen.
The reason why I speak here of the married state in the first place, is simply because a very large majority of young men are called to this state, and also because it is usually the first which is considered. We now proceed to ask the first decisive question: are you called to the married state? Ought you to marry?
2. The answer to the question, "Ought you to marry?" depends upon another question: "Do you think yourself capable of fulfilling the duties of the married state?" In order to answer this question, you must learn what these duties really are, and I will now proceed briefly to set them before you.
One of the chief among these duties requires that husband and wife should live together in concord, love, and conjugal fidelity until death. They must remain together, since marriage is indissoluble. Only when it pleases Almighty God to sever the bond ​by taking husband or wife out of the world may the survivor marry again.
3. How should married people live together? First of all, in peace and harmony. They should aim at the same goal, and strive after one and the same thing. For this end they must be united, avoiding anger, quarreling, and dissension.
The following apposite anecdote may be related here. Two married persons who lived unhappily together, carried their dispute one day so far as to come to blows. A neighbor who heard what was going on suddenly shouted: "Fire! Fire!" The quarrel was forgotten; husband and wife eagerly inquired where the fire was burning. "In hell," was the unexpected reply, "and thither married people must go who persist in living in enmity, anger, and dissension." The lesson to be drawn from this is that married people should live together in love and harmony, not in strife and discord. They should seek to please one another, they should pray for one another, and bear with one another. And they should live in conjugal fidelity, that is, they should keep the solemn promises made to one another at the altar.
4. Another important duty is that of mutual edification. They should edify one another by a Christian life; they should set one another a good example, they should seek to sanctify one another, so as finally to reach ​heaven. This is the most lofty aim, the highest goal of a union which a sacrament has rendered holy.
Just as Christ loved His own, not merely until His own end, but in such a way as to enable them to attain their final goal, which is eternal felicity, so must the husband love his wife in such a manner that they may both attain their final end, eternal blessedness. Therefore they should pray together, together attend divine service, and receive the sacraments.
5. Married people have another important duty: they must bring up their children in the fear of God.
At the day of the last judgment we who have the care of souls do not fare like private individuals; we have not merely to answer for what we have personally done or left undone, but when we have given an account of this, we shall be asked about the condition of those who have been entrusted to our care.
In the same manner shall fathers and mothers be judged, not only in regard to what their own lives have been, but also as to the manner in which they have brought up their children. This duty in regard to the proper training of children ought of itself to suffice to cause you, if you are a young man thinking of matrimony, to reflect very seriously, and not to answer the question: "Ought I to marry?" with thoughtless haste in the affirmative.
​6. But when, and under what conditions, may the reply be an affirmative one? In order briefly to sum up everything, I say to you: If you have reached a suitable time of life, if you are at least twenty-four or twenty-five years of age, if you are sound both in body and mind, if you are not afflicted with any hereditary disease; if you have a fair prospect of being able, in the pursuit of your calling, to maintain a family, if you possess the requisite endowment and capacity to fulfil the difficult duties which devolve upon parents, and to be the head of a well-ordered household, and if you think that you can preserve your chastity and promote your sanctification better as a married man than as a bachelor, then you ought to marry. But on the other hand, it would not be right to refuse to found a family, merely from love of a free and comfortable existence. May God enlighten and direct you; may God bless you.
The selfsame faith and mutual love.
The selfsame hope for joys above,
Such bonds alone in wedded life
Will joy secure, and banish strife
LXXXVI. The Companion of Your Life
1.If you have reached a suitable age, and feel yourself called to the married state, then are you confronted with the most important affair - namely, that of seeking and selecting the partner of your life.
​Then the momentous inquiry presents itself: Whom ought I to marry, with whom ought I to commence a courtship, and to what ought I principally look? I will now endeavor to reply to these questions, and to furnish you with a few practical hints.
2. In the first place, look for genuine piety, modesty, intelligence, and commonsense. A woman must necessarily possess true piety; without this she is unfit to make a man happy, or to bring up children properly. It is quite certain, however, that a young woman is destitute of real piety, no matter how frequently she may go to church, if she is guilty of disobedience, impertinence, untruthfulness, and duplicity in regard to her father and mother; or if she has a loose and biting tongue, from which no one is safe.
Beware of marrying such a one; most probably she would be the same in regard to you as she is in regard to her parents and other persons. Furthermore, if a girl is conspicuously vain, indulges her pride, dresses in an immodest and unseemly manner, is excessively fond of frequenting picnics and dancing places, and is not ashamed to parade her real or imaginary charms even in the house of God and during divine service, or if she seems in a tremendous hurry to get married - such a one could never satisfy you; she would never make you happy.
​3. Do not allow your choice to depend altogether upon minor considerations, such as physical beauty, finished manners, a charming deportment, wealth, and worldly possessions.
Physical beauty ought not to decide. When I say this I am far from meaning that you ought to marry a deformed or ugly person, or one in regard to whom you feel from the outset a repulsion or aversion. No, certainly not; but undue importance must not be attached to beauty, because it offers no security for a happy marriage.
"A beautiful body," says St. Chrysostom, 41 which is not the dwelling of a virtuous soul can hold a husband captive but for a very short time." And the same holy Doctor of the Church writes in another place: "How many husbands have come to a deplorable end, although their wives were possessed of remarkable beauty; others, on the contrary, have led a very happy life, and attained to a ripe old age, at the side of a wife possessed of but little physical attractiveness.' '
4. Worldly possessions, property, and money ought also to be a minor consideration in regard to the choice of a wife. Money need not be left altogether out of the question; but it is plain that he who looks only to the dowry, marries not the individual, but the money. To such a one may fitly be applied the saying of the holy Doctor whom we have just quoted: "It seems as if the wife were to be bought Such conduct dishonors the gift of God, and treats a holy ​sacrament as if it were an ordinary transaction."
5. I chanced to read of an instance of this style of transaction in a newspaper the other day. A very wealthy man wanted to get a son-in-law still richer than himself. He met with a young man to suit his ideas, and proposed to give b»m, in the event of his marrying his daughter, a very handsome sum as her dowry. The gentleman however, who probably loved money more than he loved the girl, demanded a still larger sum. The squabble which ensued was a long one; at length the bargain was satisfactorily concluded, and the marriage took place. The young lady does not appear to have been more sensible or noble-minded than her parent, or else she would have said to him, "Father, you can do with your money what you please, but this sordid fellow shall not have me! I want a husband who wishes to marry me, not my money!"
If money ought not to play a principal part, it is, as a rule, desirable that your betrothed should stand on nearly a similar footing with yourself in regard to property; in any case she ought not, by means of an enormous dowry, to make a rich husband out of a poverty-stricken creature. For believe me, there would then be the greatest danger of her making of you a henpecked husband, and that in accordance with the saying, ​'Money rules the world;" she would try to rule you; there would be breakers ahead in the sea of life.
5. Whom, therefore, ought you to marry? A person endowed with those qualities which will enable you to attain, in common with her, the end for which God has intended you, in your particular state of life. Therefore seek a bride who, as has already been explained, is truly pious, modest, intelligent, and sensible; who, moreover, thoroughly understands housekeeping, and takes pleasure in it; one who is thrifty, economical, neat, and careful; one who sees that everything is properly done, and who does not shirk taking part in household duties herself.
Finally, see that your betrothed is about on the same level with yourself in regard ta age and education. Remember the well known lines of Schiller:
Heart with heart together meeting,
See they are in concord beating;
Life is long, and passion fleeting.
LXXXVII. The Time of Courtship "Company-Keeping"
1.You are aware that it behooves you at all times to watch and pray, and keep strict guard over your innocence, but never is this so necessary as during the time of courtship. That is the most dangerous time for young people. If they forget God, the period ​of their engagement often witnesses the ruin of their innocence, their peace of mind, the happiness of their life.
This topic is consequently among the most important for those whose office it is to instruct young men and give them practical advice for their guidance in moral and spiritual matters. Let me tell you plainly what a Christian young man ought to think about courtship, and how he ought to conduct himself during that period.
2. A Christian young man ought to seek to know betimes what is allowed and what is forbidden in regard to courtship. He ought not to wait to know this until he has fallen deeply in love, and perhaps even made improper proposals. In this case the eye of his conscience would be dimmed; it would be impossible for him to judge aright.
For those who have already sinned together, warnings usually come too late; persuasions, entreaties, exhortations, are equally thrown away; if such persons were to see the abyss of hell yawning before them, or if some one were to rise from the dead in order to warn them, they would continue to pursue their evil way. saying it was impossible for them to desist from it.
3. Therefore, I say to you, before entering upon any courtship learn what is the right view to be taken in regard to company-keeping. But what is this right view? Careless persons who enter upon a courtship are ready to assert that company-keeping is nothing bad, but rather something beneficial and useful, since it is the necessary preliminary for marriage.
To this it may be replied, that under certain conditions, courtship is nothing evil, but profitable ​and permissible; but how few courtships there are which fulfil these conditions, and which do not appear to be dangerous and even sinful?
Father Schuen says in regard to this subject: "Young people of opposite sexes fall in love with each other, get engaged to be married, and not unfrequently remain in that state for a very long time, sometimes for years. Over this state of things heaven has reason to mourn and hell to rejoice. How so, you may ask, is there anything wrong in keeping company with a person that you intend to marry? I answer that in itself there is nothing wrong in keeping company, but that the time and other attendant circumstances very frequently convert it into a proximate occasion of sin, and that it can become very wrong. Love-affairs are frequently very lightly entered into; but they are often attended by great dangers and sad consequences.
That two persons who intend to get married should previously become better acquainted with each other is reasonable and right; in fact, ordinary prudence and the future happiness of the two demand as much. If they meet at times, provided they do not remain alone too much and especially at night, and then enter the married state in a proper and legitimate manner, such acquaintance can not be found fault with. But in many cases there is no prospect, or only a very remote one, that marriage will follow; at times there is not the slightest intention of marriage between the two that keep company. Or, when there is an engagement of marriage, they are constantly ​together; they are averse to the presence of other persons; they prefer to sit for hours in the dark; they wander about in secluded and out-of-the-way places; they are at every dance that is held for miles around. The Christian code of morals can never sanction such company-keeping. Such a method of courtship is fraught with the greatest dangers and generally constitutes a proximate occasion of sin.
Holy Scripture condemns this. "Can a man hide fire in his bosom, and his garments not burn? Or can he walk upon hot coals, and his feet not be burned?" (Prov, vi. 27, 28.) "Are you," asks St. Augustine, "more masters of yourselves than David, or wiser than Solomon? Now, if too familiar intercourse with women, and the seduction of their caresses were the ruin of these great men, how will it fare with those who purposely seek such familiarity with the opposite sex, who perhaps live in the same house with them and frequent every amusement in their company?"
St. Jerome calls illicit acquaintances the 'death-agony of a moribund chastity."
Even that mildest of moralists, St. Francis de Sales, points out the great danger of undue familiarity: "These erotic friendships evoke so many temptations, dissipations, and jealous feelings, not to speak of other things inimical to the peace of the soul, that the better feelings of the heart are completely crushed and destroyed by them." St. Alphonsus, the prince of moral theologians, says: "I maintain as a general principle, that it is a matter of great difficulty for any one who keeps up an intimacy of this kind. to preserve himself from proximate occasion of sin."
​The same conclusion becomes evident if we consider the frailty of human nature. We know that the heart of man is prone to sin. Through the fall of our first parents a great misfortune came upon them and their posterity. Man has become exceedingly weak; the door of the heart is always open to evil. St. Paul testifies to this: "I know that there dwelleth not in me, that is, in my flesh, that which is good. I see another law in my members, fighting against the law of my mind, and captivating me in the law of sin, that is in my members " (Rom. vii. 18, 23). The human heart is especially prone to the sin of impurity. A single look, a single grasp of the hand, is sufficient to awaken the fire of passion. Witness the case of David (2 Kings xi. 2 seq.).
Ask yourselves now whether there is anything wrong in these familiar associations with persons of the opposite sex. They are dangerous in the highest degree. Two young persons by nature most frail meet frequently in the twilight or the dark, in solitary places; the passions are enkindled, flames are unchecked; and you ask is there any danger I If the hermits of the desert with all their prayers and austerities, with their diet of roots and vegetables, could subdue nature only by hard struggles, what is not to be feared when it is a question of two lovers, who perhaps seldom pray and practise little if any self-denial? They will not stop short of the greatest sins if they continue their illicit company-keeping.
The ordinary consequence of dangerous familiarity is a multitude of sins. The river of iniquity that flows from them is not a single stream, but forms many most destructive currents. In the first place we must mention impurity. Indulgence 'in love-affairs, carried on ​without safeguards, results almost inevitably in violations of chastity. He who puts his hand into the fire is burned; he who scrambles over a thorny hedge tears his clothes; he who casts himself into the mire will be soiled; and he who keeps up an undue intimacy with a woman will fall into grievous sins. Experience proves only too well the truth of this statement. If such a one does not go astray at first, he will fall into sin all the surer as time goes on. At the outset they will indulge in silly conversations, then love becomes a passion and the understanding is darkened; and when passion obtains a firm foothold the will forms a thousand evil desires; sinful words and unchaste deeds not unfrequently follow.
Another evil is the grief which is caused to parents. How much grief, how much sorrow, parents endure on account of the misdeeds of their children! Their sons and daughters do not obey them, they scorn their advice and admonitions. The parents foresee only too clearly the end of the dangerous entanglements which their children have gotten into, and they mourn over them in bitterness of soul. Often these associations lead to theft. The young man goes into excessive expenses to make presents to his "company," he wants to dress above his means, to take his "company" to dances and amusements; his income is not sufficient and the deficiency must be supplied from his father's coffers. These intimacies lead to scandal. The young couple live on a footing of intimacy, they are seen together almost dairy, and yet months and years go by without marriage. People suspect ​easily that things are not right, and in many cases there is good reason for the suspicion.
Another evil that follows is frequently a desecration of the sacraments. Full and open confessions of guilt are frequently not made; a feeling of shame keeps the couple from declaring their sins as they should. -Such confessions are sacrilegious and so also is the communion which follows. Or, if they confess their sins, they are not willing to remove the proximate occasion of sin; they go from one confessor to another; they leave his admonition unheeded, give a half-hearted promise to avoid the occasion, without a firm will to do so. The absolution is nothing but empty words that can never remit sin. Thus the sacraments are profaned for years, and the mysteries of the Faith are abused in the most shameful manner.
2. Intimacies of this kind cause many tears. Sins are always a source of sorrow, but this is especially true of sins of impurity. They bring with them evils not only in the matter of eternal salvation, but even in a temporal way. Disgrace often falls upon those persons guilty of such sins. As the man grows older, he looks back with deep regret at the years spent in contempt of the law of God. On his death-bed they become a source of anguish and fear.
Not unfrequently such young men die suddenly, and have no time for repentance; they have filled the measure of iniquity, and are called to give an account of their doings. Others become hardened in vice and never repent. They are plunged into the abyss, and mourn their sins for all eternity.
These dangerous intimacies bring on consequences bitter as the sting of a serpent; they ​are attended by great dangers and sad consequences. I have not overdrawn the picture; I have spoken nothing but the truth. Make no excuses to palliate the danger of which I have spoken today. Experience shows that the reality is, if anything, worse than I have pictured it. I made the proper allowance. There is no fault to be found with company-keeping within certain limits. Where there is an earnest intention of marriage, and the engagement is not of too long duration, and the visits are made to the family, and proper hours are kept, there can be no objection. What I condemn, and what every Christian must condemn, are the courtships without reference to marriage, the intimacies protracted for years, the visits where the young people are together for hours and alone. These are nothing but proximate occasions for sin and often a living in habitual sin. For persons living so there can be no hope of absolution in the confessional which is valid before God unless they abandon the occasion. If you are carrying on an acquaintance of this kind, I beg of you, if you love God, if you love the salvation of your own soul, break it off at once. Do not answer that you have done nothing wrong as yet; if you continue, you can not remain free from sin. Cut off the hand that scandalizes you, pluck out the eye that is a source of sin and cast it from thee. Make a generous resolution now, and God will sustain you with His grace. If you do, you will always bless the day on which you conquered yourself.
Each state and calling here below
Has its own joy and its own woe;
Yet sorrowful beyond the rest
A marriage that God has not blest.
LXXXVIII. Marry a Catholic
1.AS REGARDS the choice of a wife, I have another, and a very important point to mention, namely: Marry a Catholic; on no account conclude a mixed marriage; therefore avoid engaging yourself to a non-Catholic.
First of all it must be remarked that no offense to Protestants is intended when Catholics are warned against marrying them. Protestants ought to hold similar opinions, looking at the matter from their own point or view, and, indeed, they frequently do. To prove the truth of what has just been said, I will give two extracts, the first from a Protestant newspaper; they are fraught with useful lessons for Catholics. My first quotation runs thus:
2. "A mixed marriage is always a sad mistake, and any one who forms such a union must make up his mind to experience a good deal of trouble and unhappiness. If the children are brought up as Catholics, the Protestant husband or wife must look on while they say their beads, must hear them invoking the saints, and must tolerate other practices and devotions which are distasteful and annoying to Protestants. If the children are Protestants, discontent and reproaches are sure to follow on the Catholic side; and if some are brought up as Catholics, others as Protestants, the family is divided."
​Parents and children ought to profess the same faith. A Protestant artisan who had married a Catholic, and whose only child died, expressed himself as follows?" Standing beside the death -bed of our child, I felt how great a gulf separated my wife from me. In my opinion, mixed marriages are very deplorable. O Truly, no one who cares about his own salvation and that of his children ought to contract a mixed marriage.
3. My second quotation is taken from a pamphlet entitled, "A Word of Warning to Protestants." It runs thus: "How unhappy a wife must be, who has been brought up a Catholic, and reflects, every time she attends divine worship, that her children are being, educated as Protestants. And the opposite case is just as painful. Nor do I think that the religious discussions which must arise between husband and wife can be very edifying. These discussions can scarcely be avoided if each is in earnest in regard to his or her beliefs. And if religion is to be a forbidden subject, what will become of the children?"
4. A Catholic priest could not much better or more forcibly express his disapproval of mixed marriages, than do these extracts from Protestant sources. Listen to the decision of the Catholic Church concerning mixed marriages. She has always declared her disapproval of them, and advised, nay commanded, Catholics to avoid contracting ​them. More than fourteen hundred years ago, several Councils, among them those of Elvira, Laodicea, and Chalcedon, forbade Catholics to marry heretics, unless the latter promised to become Catholics.
5. Two special reasons induced and compelled the Catholic Church to come to this decision. In the first place, a union between a Catholic and a Protestant can never be a perfect marriage, can never be what marriage ought to be. For marriage is a sacrament, and ought to be regarded and treated as such. How can this be, when the Protestant considers marriage to be a merely civil contract?
Married people should live in the closest union, the most perfect harmony; they ought to have but one heart and one soul. How can this be, when they hold such widely different opinions in regard to the most sacred and important of all subjects, namely religion?
Moreover, married people ought to help one another on the way to heaven. How can they do this when one takes the road to the right, and the other treads the path which turns to the left? Furthermore, married people ought to give their children a religious education, and they should co-operate in carrying on the good work. Again, I ask, how can they do this, when their views in regard to religion differ so widely?
6. Finally, there is another important ​reason: Mixed marriages are extremely seldom happy marriages. Upon this subject a Earned theologian writes as follows: "There s perhaps not one single instance to be found of a mixed marriage in which (although they may have lived peaceably together) the husband and wife did not, after the lapse of years, express the conviction that it would have been better for them had they never met. There was a flaw in their mutual relations, a sore spot, which could never be healed."
Therefore be warned in time, and resolve never to court a young woman who is not of your faith, that you may thus never contract a mixed marriage.
Though love may clasp the nuptial band,
Yet wedded bliss no storm can stand,
Unless the selfsame faith both share
And make God's service their first care.
The Priesthood
The Call to the Priesthood
"Neither doth any man take the honor to himself but he that is called by God, as Aaron was" (Heb. v. 4).
THE priesthood is so sublime a state, that no one should embrace it without a clearly known vocation to it.
No, no man takes this honor to himself but he that is called by God, as Aaron was.
​A negative inclination for this holy state would certainly not be sufficient. You feel no disinclination to it; it does not appeal impossible to you to fulfil its chief duties celibacy especially; you imagine yourself free from certain violent temptations; you are not destitute of the necessary talents. Is that all that is required for a vocation to the priesthood?
Much less might that be considered a call to it, which rests purely upon exterior reasons or worldly motives.
It is much to be desired that you become a priest. Pious desire! if the honor of God is its sole object, if it be subordinate to the will of God.
Priests are the representatives of God upon earth. They form a separate state. The Lord is their portion (Ps. xv. 5), and their duty consists in being a chosen generation to the Most High (1 Peter ii. 9), and in helping men to reach their eternal destiny.
The vocation of priests is to heal, to pray, and to offer sacrifice.
They cleanse men from the stains of the soul; they educate them for heaven; they fulfil, in regard to the erring, the duties of the Good Shepherd; they pour oil and wine into the wounds of the soul; they give refreshment to weary mortals; they assuage suffering and impart strength.
They praise God in their own name and in that of all the faithful; they make supplications, they give thanks, they petition for ​new graces and blessings.
They celebrate the most sublime mystery of the New Law, and daily offer up to die Eternal Father the immaculate Lamb of God, who taketh away the sins of the world, in expiation of their own sins, and those of mankind, and for the obtaining of innumerable graces and blessings.
They are God's coadjutors (i Cor. iii. 9); they are the ambassadors of Christ (2 Cor. v. 20); they are the dispensers of the mysteries of Christ (1 Cor. iv. 1).
They are saviours of souls.
To save souls! O sublime work! O work most acceptable and glorious to God, God's own work!
O heart of the priest, large as the universe, high as the heavens, restless as fire, glowing with the love of the apostles, thirsting like the Saviour's heart - who can conceive thy longing desires, hopes, sufferings, joys, struggles, and triumphs!
By reason of his vocation, the priest is obliged to a much higher degree of perfection than the rest of the faithful.
As he excels the latter in dignity, so it is becoming that he should by far excel them in nobility of soul and in sanctity of life.
He is the salt of the earth. Woe to the salt, if it lose its savor (Matt. v. 13), for then it is unfit for seasoning.
He is a light. Woe to the light that proves ​to be an ignis fatuus! Woe to the light that is extinguished, or hidden under a bushel!
He is the city of God, set upon a mountain (Matt, v. 14). Woe to the mountain that is so surrounded by mists and vapors, that the city on its top is lost to the sight of the expectant pilgrim!
If souls are committed to the priest's charge, and if he is to lead them to heaven, he must surely walk himself in the way of salvation.
If he is to educate mankind in spirituality, he must certainly labor unceasingly at his own spiritual perfection.
How dare the curse of sin adhere to the hands that have been made especially to bless?
Shall the mouth which is to announce the words of life, be the mouth of one spiritually dead?
Shall the priest's actions contradict the word of edification, and pull down instead of building up?
You ask for the marks of a true vocation to the holy priesthood?
First, pay attention to the preliminary conditions:
Do you possess the necessary talents? Erroneously, or rather, almost blasphemously, it is asserted, sometimes, that anything is good enough for God. Hear what he himself says on this point: "The lips of the priest shall keep knowledge, and they shall seek the law at his mouth, because he is an angel of the ​Lord of hosts " (Malach. ii. 7). And do you suppose that the priestly eloquence, by means of which the Holy Ghost speaks to the faithful, can exist without a solid, scientific foundation?
Is your life spotless? A youth spent in purity is, of course, the best recommendation; yet, on the other hand, penitents are not excluded from the priesthood - penitents, that is, such as have expiated and are still expiating the transgressions whereby they once criminally desecrated their youth; penitents, who, after having long since, and most energetically, renounced their evil habits, prepare themselves by a pure present for a still purer future, and leave no means untried to grow and advance in virtue and holiness.
As regards the marks themselves, there are very many; the greater the number you possess, the more certain your call.
Is your intention a perfectly pure one? Do you seek in the priesthood God, your own, and your neighbor's salvation, and nothing temporal - such as honor, prosperity, ease, comfort? Is it God, above all, that urges you to embrace this state? Have you heard this call repeatedly?
Do you perceive an -interior urging to this holy state? Does the thought of your future priesthood calm and refresh you?
Is the honor of God really dear to your heart? Have you a lively desire to save souls?
Do you find pleasure in spiritual things?
​Do you love prayer, the sacraments, spiritual reading, intercourse with pious and spiritual persons?
If you are truly called to the priestly state, that is, to a life of sacrifice, how is it you are not able to make a sacrifice of evil in yourself, to give up a favorite sin, to overcome a favorite inclination?
Prove yourself - aye, prove yourself very seriously. From almost all other states one may recede; but here, there is no return; once bound, you are bound forever. Thou art a priest forever, according to the order of Melchizedek.
Blessed you, if you are called to re -enforce the sacred phalanx which gives to the Church militant her heroic champions and leaders in the battle!
Once more: the call must come from above. This is the only legitimate gate to the fold of Jesus Christ, of which it is said: "He that entereth not by the door into the sheepfold, is a thief and a robber" (John x. i).
Yes, young man, God must call you. Woe to him who intrudes uncalled into that holiest of states, in which the sacrilegious intruder not only does no good, but effects, alas! an infinite injury to himself and others I
O terrible utterance of the Eternal Truth: " Every plant which is not planted by God shall be rooted up " (Matt. xv. 13), since it brings forth no fruit; it is useless in itself Mid to others: it is fit only to be cast into ​the fire and to be burned. Pray, pray fervently, that you may know and do the will of God.
" 'Tis Thy good pleasure, not my own,
In Thee, my God, I love alone;
And nothing I desire of Thee
But what Thy goodness wills for me.
O will of God, O will divine,
All, all our love be ever Thine.
" To Thee I consecrate and give
My heart and being while I live;
Thou, O my God, alone shalt be
My love for all eternity.
May heaven and earth with love fulfil,
My God, Thy ever-blessed will."
The Religious State
XC. The Happiness of a Religious Vocation
1.I SHOULD not consider that I had entirely completed the task I set myself in writing these pages, were I not to add a few words concerning the religious state. In many countries the present time is certainly not favorable to it. Religious are harassed, persecuted, and chased out of the quiet retreats they have chosen for themselves. These persecutions are, however, quite unable to stifle the sublime vocation to the life of the cloister. The vital sap which circulates so abundantly within the Church ​produces continually, in this direction also, fresh buds and blossoms. And it is in the peasant, artisan, and industrial classes, youths are ever and again to be found, whom the voice of God calls, and forcibly impels to enter the hallowed precincts of the cloister. What are we to think concerning this vocation to the religious life? Lay to heart in the first place the happiness of such a vocation.
2. The judgment of the short-sighted world is entirely false when it imagines the life of a Religious to be joyless, melancholy, depressing, more or less unhappy. The monk must indeed renounce much which men regard as pleasure and enjoyment, but only to be compensated a hundred-fold by higher and purer joys. Have you ever seen a vine pruned? The process seems to hurt the vine and bitter drops, like tears, ooze from the stem; yet it proves to be for its good, and increases its value. Thus it is with a Religious. All the sacrifices which he has perchance to make, do but augment his happiness; they increase that peace which, as Christ says, "the world can not give." And fee same divine Redeemer gives this assurance to those who serve and follow Him: "My yoke is sweet, and my burden light."
3. Consider attentively another remarkable utterance which the Saviour spoke. When St. Peter asked: "Behold, we have left all things and have followed thee. What ​therefore shall we have?" Jesus answered and said: "Amen, I say to you, there is no man that hath left house, or parents, or brethren, or wife, or children, for the kingdom of God's sake, who shall not receive much more in this present time, and in the world to come, life everlasting" (Luke xviii. 29, 30).
Life everlasting! This promise does not surprise us. But the other is very remarkable. Even in this life the disciples who follow Christ wholly and entirely will be bountifully rewarded. They will receive a hundred-fold, far more than they have left, even in this time; liberty of spirit, peace, interior joy, happiness, confidence in God, brotherly love.
It is, however, true that those who enter the cloister take human nature with them; and there also is much human frailty to be found. But in spite of all this, there is but one spirit which pervades the cloister - the spirit of love - a fraternal co-operation in all undertakings. That is the blessing of Christ, the happiness of a religious vocation.
4. This happiness is mirrored in the daily life of a true Religious. The whole day is consecrated exclusively to God by means of obedience, cheerful labor, and religious exercises. His first awaking in the early hours of the morning is a pious upward glance to the most holy Trinity, whom he adores, and to whom in his prayers he offers up his life, his will, his heart, and its desires.
​In the course of the day, wherever he may be, whatever he may do, he remembers that he is in the house of God, and in the service of God. In this way a laborious and wearisome life seems a paradise to him, dearer than any transitory enjoyment in the palaces of this world.
And in the evening, before he lies down to rest, he closes his day's work in the presence of the blessed Sacrament of the Altar, and commends his spirit to the sacred Heart of Jesus. And in spirit at least he is never separated from the hallowed precincts of the sanctuary; in thought and desire he is always united with Jesus in the Tabernacle, and he can truly say with the prophet: "My soul hath desired thee even in the night."
5. We can form an idea of the sublimity of the religious state, if we reflect on the example of Jesus, the God-man. He led a life of more than angelic purity, a life of mortification, renunciation, and self-denial, aid He willed to be born of a pure virgin, and loved Joseph more than any other man. on account of his virginal purity.
When a young man, imitating this great love of Our Lord for purity, takes refuge in the cloister, treading the pleasures of the world under his feet, in order in virginal purity to follow the chaste Lamb of God and His immaculate Mother, will he not then enjoy that sweet delight of pure souls which ​is unknown to the children of the world? His happiness is indeed a foretaste of the peace and joy of heaven. Finally, Jesus Christ came, not to do His own will, but He humbled Himself and became obedient unto death, even to the death of the cross. If a Religious imitates this example also, and places himself for his whole life under obedience to his spiritual superiors, will he not reap the blessing and the fruits of such a sacrifice? Sublime is the religious state and truly great is the happiness of a Religious. But do you, my friend, trust in God; leave it to Him, whether this happiness is, or is not to be your portion. Pray for guidance and be ever ready to do the will of God with a cheerful and generous heart.
Jesus, day by day
Lead us on life's way,
Naught of danger shall we reckon,
Following where Thou dost beckon.
Lead us by the hand
To our Fatherland.
Lead, kindly Light, amid the encircling gloom Lead Thou me on!
The night is dark, and I am far from home, Lead Thou me on!
Keep Thou my feet; I do not ask to see The distant scene - one step enough for me.
I was not ever thus, nor pray'd that Thou Shouldst lead me on.
I loved to choose and see my path, but now Lead Thou me on!
​I loved the garish day, and, spite of fears, Pride ruled my will: remember not past years.
So long Thy power hath blest me, sure it still Will lead me on.
O'er moor and fen, o'er crag and torrent, till The night is gone; And with the morn those angel faces smile Which I have loved long since, and lost awhile.
- Cardinal Newman.
XCI. The Sacrifices of a Religious Vocation
1.HAPPY are those who are called to the religious state. But we must not look exclusively at the happiness and advantages which accompany life in the cloister, but we must also weigh the sacrifices which it entails. A religious house is no place for lotus-eaters. No one ought to enter the cloister with the idea of exchanging a life of effort and struggle in the world for a quiet and comfortable existence. He who seeks nothing but this in an Order, nothing but sweet tranquillity and undisturbed comfort, will find himself bitterly deceived. Reflect merely upon the trials of community life. Consider one of the essential conditions of life in the cloister, namely, this one: to live with many others and to be dependent upon others. The rules of every convent, quite apart from the question of contact with many others, with many different ​characters, make demands which are absolutely incompatible with a desire for self-indulgence and self-satisfying solitude.
The Ego we love so well, and cherish so tenderly, can no longer make its claims felt. It is not necessary to think of a specially strict Order where the regulations are peculiarly stringent, but the obligatory observance of the vows is merely to be reflected upon - to possess nothing of one's own, to live in subjection to a superior; this done, it will at once be clearly perceived that self-will can no longer hold the scepter there.
2. Thus we see that the life of a true Religious is a life of constant sacrifice. For he relinquishes all those things which are most calculated to bind poor human beings down to earth. The evangelical counsels, which the Saviour Himself has given, and to the observance of which the Religious pledges himself, can not be faithfully carried out without grievous sacrifices on the part of the
carnal man. Every one knows what these counsels are: voluntary poverty, virginal purity, and constant obedience to a spiritual superior. And Religious pledge themselves
to the conscientious observance of these counsels under pain of grievous sin when they pronounce their vows either for their whole life, or at least for a definite period.
3. It must certainly involve a sacrifice to pronounce the vow of poverty, for instance, and to keep it faithfully. Or can it be easy ​for a young man who possesses a fortune of his own, and can dispose of it as he pleases, to renounce now and for all future time all claim to call anything his own, or to appropriate anything for his own use without the permission of a superior? Can it be easy for him during the whole of his life in the convent to ask, like a child, for permission to keep a trifling gift, or to exchange it or give it away?
4. The vow of chastity also involves a great sacrifice, namely, the complete renunciation of married family life - the observance of virginal purity for the Saviour's sake. This sacrifice is peculiarly pleasing to Our Lord.
The Saviour came into the world in a state of poverty; He renounced everything, and was cradled on the rough straw of the manger. But one thing He never gave up; even in the stable His eye wanted to rest upon virginal souls. Therefore He willed to see Mary and Joseph beside the manger. Poor as He came into the world, He also died; His death-bed was the hard wood of the cross. But there also, amid the gloom and sufferings, two lilies of purity, Mary and John, were at the foot of the cross.
Like these lilies ought all those young men to be who are planted in the chosen garden of the Lord, in the religious state. This life of virginal purity involves a perpetual conflict, an endeavor to obtain the crown of ​angels while dwelling in mortal flesh. But this conflict, this struggle, can be termed nothing but sacrifice, renunciation, self-denial.
5. The third vow is the vow of obedience. How many sacrifices does this single word imply I St. Gregory the Great once said that it is not so difficult to give up one's possessions; but it is difficult indeed to renounce oneself. By obedience one gives up oneself as one gives up one's own will.
This also involves sacrifices. They are often secret sacrifices of which no one knows anything, which the world does not know, which no one extols, but which cut to the quick the inmost soul. But how exalted are these sacrifices, these conquests of self! How richly will the Father, who seeth in secret, reward them one day.
6. Thus we see that obedience requires continual sacrifices at the hands of a Religious; not one single instant is he, if we may so speak, free from the yoke. Obedience calls him in the morning, and commands him in the evening; obedience orders everything in the house, prescribes the hours of work and the form of that work, the time for prayer and the form of prayer, the time of recreation and the length of that recreation. Obedience guides and controls his every step and movement.
Little enough is the room left for the exercise of self-will. By the practice of obedience a ceaseless war is waged against self. ​Therefore if you, my friend, think that you are called to the religious state, examine yourself carefully to discover whether you have strength and courage to make these sacrifices.
Remember the words of St. Paul: "I can do all things in Him who strengtheneth me."
The help of divine grace will not be wanting to you in the event that you should be called to make the sacrifices involved in the religious life. If you have the necessary talents and dispositions, -go forward courageously! Take up the mighty weapon of obedience; with it combat the enemies of your salvation. Through disobedience man separated himself from God, his creator and final end; through obedience he must return to Him. Even should you remain in the world you will still have to walk in the way of obedience. Perfect obedience to their Superiors is demanded of Religious; faithful obedience to the commands of God and of holy Church is incumbent on seculars.
All for Thee, O Heart of Jesus
How sweet it is to feel, dear Lord! That Thou wilt surely see
Each work, or thought, or act of mine
That may be done for Thee I
That when I try with pure intent
To serve, to please, to love Thee,
Thy watchful Heart each effort knows,
Thy blessing rests above me.
Nothing unnoticed, nothing lost Unlike the world - in all things
Grateful art Thou for all I do,
For great as well as small things.
Empty my soul of all desire
Man's idle praise to seek,
Hide me in Thee, for Thou dost know
How frail I am - and weak.
Take Thou my all, since for so long
Thy providence has sought me,
Make me Thine own, since at such cost
Thy precious blood has bought me.
A Few Concluding Words
XCII. Farewell
1.How touching is the account given us in Scripture of the farewell which the youthful Tobias took of his blind father and his weeping mother in order to go forth into a strange country. How touching is the lamentation: " Woe, woe is me, my son, why did we send thee to go to a strange country, the light of our eyes, the staff of our old age, the comfort of our life, the hope of our posterity? "
A similar feeling of sadness steals into my heart, now that I have arrived at the conclusion of these instructions. You, my young friend, are about to go forth into life, into all the thousand perils and pitfalls which in the present day, more than ever, threaten to ​ruin both the faith and the innocence of a young man.
2. But I comfort myself with the thought that I have every reason to say, with the aged father of Tobias: "I believe that the good angel of God doth accompany him, and doth order all things well that are done about him."
This good angel, I know, is your guardian angel, and this little book also, I trust, will serve as your guardian and your guide also. It will accompany you when you go forth into the world, and remain always at your side. It depends only upon you that this companion should remind you what fa to be done, and what is to be left undone; you must simply take counsel with it by leading this little volume attentively.
I will now, in taking farewell, briefly recapitulate under five resolutions all that has been said. You must impress these resolutions indelibly on your memory, and adhere to them faithfully.
3. First Resolution. I will be careful to say my daily prayers regularly, and never to omit hearing Mass on Sundays and holidays without absolute necessity.
This resolution may be epitomized in one word: Prayer. Prayer is the pivot on which the spiritual life of every Christian, and certainly of every Catholic young man, revolves; prayer is the very breath of the soul, its vital breath. And bear in mind that by ​prayer is meant both vocal and mental prayer. Read attentively what is said in this book on mental prayer or meditation. Try to make at least a short meditation every day, or a spiritual reading with pious reflections and devout affections from a book like "The Following of Christ," or "The Lives of the Saints."
With the Royal Psalmist you should be able to say: "I had in mind the eternal years." (Ps. lx. 6).
" In all thy works, remember thy last end, and thou shall never sin." (Ecclus. vii. 40).
" We have not here a lasting city, but we seek one that is to come." (Heb. xiv 14).
" The number of the days of men at the most are a hundred years: As a drop of water of the sea are they esteemed: And as a pebble of the sands, so are a few years compared to eternity." (Ecclus. xviii. 8).
Say a little prayer daily for the grace of a happy death, e.g. the " Memorare," or " Jesus, Mary, and Joseph, assist me in my last agony!" "Jesus, Mary, and Joseph, may I breathe forth my soul in peace with you. "
Cultivate a tender love and a fervent devotion to Jesus in the Most Blessed Sacrament of the Altar, and to the Mother of Jesus, the ever Blessed Virgin Mary. Cultivate a practical devotion by imitating the virtues of Jesus and Mary in your daily life.
​Second Resolution. I will make it my practice to receive the sacraments regularly - at least once a month.
Here you may impress on your mind the word: Sacraments. Confession and communion constitute a never-failing source, a fount of grace, whereby the life of the soul may be evermore renewed, maintained, and strengthened. It is truly an indispensable condition for the preservation of the supernatural life of the soul, that it should draw strengthening waters out of the Saviours fountains.
Third Resolution. I will carefully avoid everything likely to endanger my faith, especially bad companions, infidel and immoral publications, and luxurious living. See that the light of faith which is in you be not darkened or weakened by listening to conversation opposed to faith and to the Church, or by reading books, pamphlets, and newspapers which have a similar tendency, or by an immoral course of life on your part.
Fourth Resolution, In confession I will always be careful, candid, and sincere in regard to the sixth commandment.
This commandment reminds you that you ought to make every effort in order to safeguard and preserve that fairest ornament of your youth, innocence - chastity. The most effectual means to this end is childlike candor in confession. This candor will be your salvation. But alas for you if you do not tell the whole truth, or if you gloss over ​your transgressions, and conceal your temptations or the perils to which you are exposed.
Fifth Resolution. I will join the Sodality, or The Young Men's Society, and other Catholic and charitable organizations connected with my parish church, according to my means and circumstances, such as The League of the Sacred Heart, The Society of St. Vincent de Paul or of The Holy Name or of The Propagation of the Faith.
Do all you can to further the interests of your parish, church, and school. Your heart should be aflame with a zeal for the House of God as was the heart of David, who was able to say truly: "I have loved, O Lord, the beauty of Thy house and the place where Thy glory dwelleth" (Ps. xxv. 8).
The resolution in regard to joining the Sodality, The Young Men's Society, or The Catholic Club of your parish church, is of particular importance. These associations aim at preserving their members from wandering into forbidden paths or to lead them back into the right road, when they have gone astray. Revere and love your pastor; second all his efforts for the welfare of your society; be kind and helpful toward your associates.
4. In conclusion I will adopt the words which the aged Tobias addressed to his son: " All the days of thy life have God in thy mind, and take heed thou never consent to sin, nor ​transgress the commandments of the Lord our God. Take heed to keep thyself, my son, from all fornication; never suffer pride to reign in thy mind or in thy words, for from ft all perdition took its beginning. May you have a good journey, and God be with you on your way, and his angel accompany you! "
"In doing good, let us not fail; for in due time, we shall reap, not failing" (Gal. vi. 9).
Wishing
Do you wish the world were better?
Let me tell you what to do.
Set a watch upon your actions.
Keep them always straight and true.
Rid your mind of selfish motives,
Let your thoughts be clean and high.
You can make a little Eden
Of the sphere you occupy.
Do you wish the world were happy?
Then remember day by day
Just to scatter seeds of kindness
As you pass along the way.
For the pleasures of the many
May be ofttimes traced to one,
As the band that plants the acorn
Shelters armies from the sun. - Leaflets.
To Jesus, Mary, and Joseph
Jesus, whose almighty bidding
All created things fulfil,
Lived on earth in meek subjection
To His earthly parents' will
Sweetest Infant, make us patient
And obedient for Thy sake;
Teach us to be chaste and gentle,
All our stormy passions break.
Blessed Mary! thou wert chosen
As Mother of thy Lord:
Thou didst guide the early footsteps
Of the great Incarnate Word.
Dearest Mother! make us humble;
For thy Son will take His rest
In the poor and lowly dwelling
Of a humble sinner's breast.
Joseph! thou wert called the father
Of thy Maker and thy Lord;
Thine it was to save thy Saviour
From the cruel Herod's sword.
Suffer us to call thee father;
Show to us a father's love;
Lead us safe through every danger
Till we meet in heaven above.