# The Tragicall History of the Life and Death of Doctor Faustus/Scene 17

Enter the Duke of Vanholt, his Dutchesse, Faustus, and Mephostophilis.
Duke. Thanks Master Doctor, for these pleasant sights. Nor know I how sufficiently to recompense your great deserts, in erecting that inchanted Castle in the Ayre: The sight whereof so delighted me, As nothing in the world could please me more.
Faust. I doe thinke my selfe my good Lord, highly recompenced, in that it hath pleased your Grace to think but well of that which Faustus hath performed. But gracious Lady, it may bee, that you have taken no pleasure in those sights: therefore I pray you tell me what is the thing you most desire to have, be it in the world, it shall be yours: I have heard that great-bellied women doe long for things are rare and dainty.
Lady. True Master Doctor, and since I find you so kind, I will make knowne unto you what my heart desires to have, and were it now Summer, as it is January, a dead time of the Winter, I would request no better meat than a dish of ripe grapes.
Faust. This is but a small matter: go, Mephostophilis, away.
Exit Mepho.
Enter Mephostophilis againe with the grapes.
For they come from a farre Country, I can tell you.
Duke. This makes me wonder more than all the rest, that at this time of the yeare when every tree is barren of his fruit, from whence you had these ripe grapes.
Faust. Please it your Grace, the yeare is divided into two circles over the whole world, so that when it is Winter with us, in the contrary circle it is likewise Summer with them, as in India, Saba, and such Countries that lye farre East, where they have fruit twice a yeare. From whence by meanes of a swift Spirit that I have, I had these grapes brought as you see.
Lady. And trust me they are the sweetest grapes that ere I tasted.
The Clowne bounceth at the gate within.
Duke. What rude disturbers have we at the Gate?
Go pacifie their furie, set it ope, And then demand of them what they would have.
They knocke againe, and call out to talke with Faustus.
A Servant. Why how now Masters, what a coyle is there? What is the reason you disturbe the Duke?
Dic. We have no reason for it, therefore a fig for him.
Ser. Why saucy varlets, dare you be so bold?
Horse. I hope sir, we have wit enough to be more bold then welcome.
Ser. It appeares so, pray be bold elsewhere, And trouble not the Duke.
Duke. What would they have?
Ser. They all cry out to speake with Doctor Faustus.
Cart. I, and we will speake with him.
Duke. Will you, sir? Commit the raskalls.
Dicke. Commit with us, he were as good commit with his Father as commit with us.
Faust. I do beseech your Grace let them come in, They are good subject to a merriment.
Duke. Do as thou wilt Faustus, I give thee leave.
Faust. I thanke your grace.
Enter the Clown, Dick, Carter, and Horse-courser.
Why how now my good friends? Faith you are too outrageous, but come neere, I have procur'd your pardons: welcome all.
Clow. Nay sir we will be welcome for our mony, and we will pay for what we take: What ho, give's half a dozen of Beere here, and be hang'd.
Faust. Nay harke you, can you tell where you are?
Cart. I marry can I, we are under heaven.
Ser. I but sir sauce boxe, know you in what place?
Horse. I, I, the house is good enough to drinke in: Zouns fill us some Beere, or we'll breake all the barrels in the house and dash out all your braines with your bottles.
Faust. Be not so furious, come, you shall have Beere, My Lord, beseech you give me leave a while, Ile gage my credit, twill content your Grace.
Duke. With all my heart kinde Doctor, please thy selfe, Our servants and our Court's at thy command.
Faust. I humbly thank your Grace: then fetch some Beere.
Horse. I marry there spake a Doctor indeed, and faith Ile drink a health to thy woodden leg for that word.
Faust. My woodden leg? what dost thou meane by that?
Cart. Ha, ha, ha, dost heare him Dicke, he has forgot his leg.
Horse. I, I, he dos not stand much upon that.
Faust. No faith, not much upon a woodden leg.
Cart. Good Lord, that flesh and blood should be so fraile with your Worship: Doe not you remember a Horse-courser you sold a horse to?
Faust. Yes, I remember I sold one a horse.
Cart. And doe you remember you bid he should not ride him into the water?
Faust. Yes, I do very well remember that.
Cart. And do you remember nothing of your leg?
Faust. No in good sooth.
Cart. Then I pray remember your courtesse.
Faust. Thanke you sir.
Cart. Tis not so much worth: I pray you tell me one thing.
Faust. What's that?
Cart. Bee both your legs bed-fellowes every night together?
Faust. Wouldst thou make a Colossus of me, that thou askst me such questions?
Cart. No truly sir, I would make nothing of you, but I would faine know that.
Enter Hostesse with drinke.
Faust. Then I assure thee certainly they are.
Cart. I thanke you I am fully satisfied.
Faust. But wherefore dost thou aske?
Cart. For nothing, sir: but me thinks you should have a woodden bedfellow of one of 'em.
Horse. Why doe you heare sir did not I pull off one of your legs when you were asleepe?
Faust. But I have it againe now I am awake: looke you here sir.
All. O horrible, had the Doctor three legs?
Cart. Doe you remember sir, how you cozened me and eat up my load of————
Faustus charms him dumbe.
Doe you remember how you made me weare an Apes————
Horse. You whorson conjuring scab, doe you remember how you cozened me with a ho————
Clow. Have you forgotten me? You think to carry it away with your Hey-passe, and Re-pass: doe you remember the dogs fa————
Exeunt Clownes.
Who payes for the Ale? hear you, M. Doctor, now you have sent away my Guests, I pray who shall pay me for my A———— Exit Hostesse.
Lady. My Lord, We are much beholden to this learned man.
Duke. So are we Maddam, which we will recompence With all the love and kindnesse that we may. His artfull sports drive all sad thoughts away.
Exeunt.