# The New School of Love (1806)

THE
New School of Love;
BEING THE
True Art of Courtship.
SHEWING,
TO WHICH ARE ADDED,
A choice Collection of the newest and very best Love Songs, Toasts, Sentiments, &c.
GLASGOW, PRINTED BY J. and M. ROBERTSON, SALTMARKET, 1806.
How persons may know their partner's disposition and Temper, by the Hair, Eyes, Nose, &c.
Hair that is slender and hangs down, not curling, betokens a weak body, and harmless disposition—Hair that is strong and red,is a proper badge for Venus’ wars.—Hair that is short
The signification of Moles on any part of the Body.
A Mole, on the right side of the forehead, signifies the party wise and industrious.
A Mole, on the left side of the forehead, signifies the party to be of no great ingenuity; but that he is laborious, and shall obtain riches.
A Mole, on the middle of the fore head, denotes an indifferent fortune, and that the party shall be much beloved, and by that means doubtless attain unto preferment.
A Mole, on the right eye-brow, promises the party riches by marriage.
A Mole,on the left eye-brow,betokens the first marriage unhappy,but the second very fortunate.
A Mole, on the nose, denotes another on the private parts; which betokens the party to be lustful, and very desirous of marriage.
A Mole, on the chin, or on the corner of the mouth, denotes riches and honour; but that the party is somewhat given to gluttony.
A Mole,on the throat, threatens the party with diseases, such as the stranguary, quinzey, &c.
A Mole, on the neck behind, is ominous, unless the same be averted by Providence.
A Mole, on the right shoulder, signifies the favour of great persons; and on the left, servility; labour and crosses.
A Mole, on the back signifies a good name, and many children.
A Mole, on the middle of the belly, just by the navel, denotes an early marriage.
A Mole, on the private parts shews the party powerful in venery,and promises many children.
​A Mole, on the buttocks, denotes the party to be of a very pliant and affable temper.
A Mole, on the right thigh, denotes pleasure.
A Mole, on the left thigh, the reverse.
A Mole, on the knee, denotes the party to be much given to piety and devotion.
A Mole, on the calf of the leg, signifies the party will be subject to the gout.
A Mole, on the right ancle, denotes the person sweet and industrious.
One on the left ancle threatens him with falling into the hands of thieves and robbers.
A Mole, on the right foot, denotes that the party shall travel on honourable occasions.
A Mole, on the left foot, denotes to a woman much danger in child-birth, and to a man danger in travel.
A Mole, between the eyes, denotes the party to grow rich by marriage.
A Mole, on the right cheek, shews the party to be prosperous in worldly affairs, but covetous and desirous to circumvent people.
A Mole, on the left cheek, shews to a man crosses in his affairs, to a woman, loss of honour, and danger in child-birth.
A Mole, on the right-arm, promises much labour; and on the left, riches and honour.
A Mole, on the breast, promises the party advancement by the favour of great ones.
A Mole, on the belly, demonstrates the party to be beloved, and to gain riches by it.
A Mole, on the right lip, denotes the person to be beloved and fortunate in love.
A Mole, on the left lip, signifies the party ​⟨shall⟩ be very rich by the death of a relation.
A Mole, on the right knee, promises success in love, and many marriages.
A Mole, on the left knee, crosses and disappointments in love.
A Discourseon Dreams with their Interpretations.
To dream you see white hens upon a dunghill, shews disgrace by a false accusation.
To deam one is in a pleasant meadow, signifies the possession of riches and pleasure.
To dream one fights and overcomes, is to have the advantage in law-suits, or otherwise.
To dream that two lovers meet, and have not power to speak to each other, shews that the match will be broken off.
Todream of embraces,denotes sudden marriage.
To dream of fine clothing, and that they turn to rags upon your back, shews poverty.
To dream one is with child, and does not know the father, shews marriage to a stranger.
To dream a ring drops off one’s finger, shews crosses in love.
To dream one has a garland of flowers presented, shews they will have the person desired.
To dream of fire, denotes anger.
To dream you fly, signifies hasty news of ⟨strange⟩ things.
Todream one puts a gold ring upon your ⟨finger⟩, signifies speedy marriage; but if it seem to ⟨break⟩ or fall off, there will be disappointment in it.
To dream you see a flock of birds that sing ⟨and⟩ chirp merrily, promises good news; and ⟨that⟩ you will soon grow rich.
​To dream you see the sun and moon very shining, signifies riches and honour; but if eclipsed, crosses and disappointments.
To dream of finding small pieces of silver, denotes disappointments in trade and business.
To dream you see a purse hanging by your bed-side with gold in it, signifies you will find hidden treasure.
For a woman to dream another kisses her, signifies barrenness, or disappointment in love.
To dream you see and are kindly conversing with your sweet-heart, promiseth marriage.
A young Mans Letter to his Sweet-heart.
DEAR MADAM, The long and considerate regard, by which in deep contemplation, I have eyed ⟨your⟩ most rare and singular virtues, joined with (illegible text) admirable beauty, hath moved me among (illegible text) number, who entirely I know do favour you earnestly to love you, and therewith to ⟨offer⟩ myself unto you; notwithstanding I may seem ⟨in⟩ some eyes the least in worthiness of those ⟨that⟩ often frequent you; yet you may vouchsafe ⟨in⟩ the private cabinet of your heart, to accept ⟨of⟩ me as your obliged servant, to honour ⟨those⟩ rare virtues which your most excellent ⟨person⟩ is adorned with. If fervent and allured love grounded upon the undecayed stay and prop ⟨of⟩ your virtue; if continued vows and my services⟨;⟩ if never ceasing and tormenting grief, uncertainly carried by a hazardous expectation, ⟨closed⟩ in the circle of your gracious conceit, ⟨whether⟩ to bring in the cares of my soul, ⟨sweet⟩ ​murmur of life, or severe sentence of a present death, may, or ought to prevail, either to move, intreat, solicit, or persuade you, I then am and I will be the man who does honour in my inward thoughts, the dignity of so worthy a creature, and praising, in deepest weight, tho’ not to your utmost value, the estimate of so incomparable a beauty, have resolved, living to love you, and tidying never to serve other but you; from whose indelicate looks, expecting no worse acceptance may seem answerable to so divine an excellency:
I remain your perpetually devoted, &c.
The MAID'S REPLY.
SIR,
Yours, as far as modesty will permit, &c.
Letter from a Love-Sick Youth to a scornful Maid.
WHilst gales of sighs were sent from my sad breast, And thoughts of you would give my eyes no rest, Snatching a midnight taper straight to write, I did begin but fancy dull’d my fight; Then pardon, if some blots do here appear, While I entreat you to be kind as fair. Pity the man that pines and sighs for you, The man, who vows for ever to be true: And thinks that nothing is for you too good: O give me some, altho’ Camelion’s food: Let me have hopes, altho’ I feed on air, And run me not thus, head-long to despair: Send me a cordial, dearest, or I die: Tis thou or death! must end my misery: One or the other, I must surely have: You for a wife, or wed the silent grave: I strive to wear the chain, and live in pain: And, ’till I know my doom, I must remain.
Yours, &c. &c.
ANSWER
SIR, YOur poetical fancy is very great, I suppose much greater than your passion: but if you are real, take notice, I give you leave to hope: Yet rely not too much upon that, for women’s minds are wavering. Indeed I could have wish’d you had plac’d your affections some where else: For tho’ I should admit you among the number of my servants, it is ten to one if ever you have what you desire. This letter, ​however pleasing it may be, I cannot tell, I wrote it at the importunity of your servant, which I had not done, but that he told me, he must have but a bad welcome, if he returned empty-handed; therefore take it as it is, and make what you can of it, while I rest at my own disposal,
Your humble servant, &c.
A Clown's Praise of his Mistress.
EXcellent Mistress, brighter than the moon. The scow’red pewter, or the silver spoon; Fairer than Phoebus, or the morning star; Dainty fair, Mistress by my truth you are: As far exceeding Diana and her nymphs, As lobsters crawfish, and crawfish shrimps: Thine eyes like diamonds shine most clearly, As I am an honest man I love thee dearly.
His EPISTLE to her.
I Love, because it comes to me by kind: And much because it much delights my mind; And thee, because it much delights my heart, And that alone, because of thy desert: I love, and much, and thee, and thee alone, By kind, mind, heart, and every one.
Her ANSWER.
THou lovest not, because thou art unkind, Nor much,because it delights not thy mind, Nor me, because I am not in thy heart, Nor me, because I want desert, Thou lov’st not much, nor me, nor me alone By kind, mind, heart, nor any one.
​A Letter from a young Man in town to his Sweetheart in the country, putting her in mind of her promise.
SWEET-HEART. MY loving respects presented to you, and your good friends, and altho’ at present our bodies are separated some miles asunder; yet let not the inward love of thy heart wax cold, but let us bear in mind a faithful love to one another. Had not some occasions unlooked for stept in the way, I had waited upon you before this time: But yet I hope a week’s time, will not in any ways be a bar to keep you from your promise. In the mean time, I will entreat you to accept of this poor token of my love, who, am your languishing lover, until such times as I see you, and to seal these promise's with the fast knot of wedlock. Desiring to be excused for my unwilling delay, I rest wholly
Yours to be commanded, &c.
The MAID'S REPLY.
SIR, HE that never offended, may easily be excused: but as for my poor service, if it will be any ways beneficial to you, I shall think, myself happy, and hope on my side there will be no complaint of breaking promises: I desire nothing more than your company, if it be not prejudicial to you: I shall think every hour a day till I see you: Not knowing to be burdensome in my writing, I commend you to the divine protection, and, am
Yours in what I may, &c.
Posies for Rings, &c.
AS I expect, so let me find, A faithful heart, a constant mind.
ANOTHER.
My faith is giv’n, this pledge doth show, A work of Heaven perform'd below.
ANOTHER.
Such like I in my choice do find, That nought but death can change my mind.
On a Pair of Gloves presented.
FAirest, to thee I send these Gloves, If you love me, Leave out the G, And make a pair of Loves.
On the Word WIFE.
THE W is a double wealth, The I an everlasting joy: The F a friend unto man’s health, T The E doth end all annoy.
The REPLY.
THE W is a double woe, The I nought else but jealousy: The F a flyting flattering foe, The E an earthly enemy.
A Song for the Wedding Night.
NOw is that welcome night, When love and beauty make a feast; Let not the Bridegroom be afraid, Though he encounter with a maid: She’ll squeak, she'll cry, She’ll faint, she’ll die: ​She'll then begin to tremble: But take her and rouze her, And mouse her and touse her, You’ll find she doth dissemble.
Now Mistress Bride, this much to you, The item I shall give is true, Young maidens must not be too coy, To entertain their wish’d for joy, But take him and hug him, And tug him and lug him, For thus true love is try’d, Be not nice in yielding But loving and willing To grant him what must not be deny'd.
A NEW PLAY-HOUSE SONG.
SWEET are the charms of her I love, More fragrant than the blooming rose, Soft as the down or turtle dove: Gentle as wind when zephyr blows: Refreshing as descending rains, To sun-burnt climes, and thirsty plains.
True as the needle to the pole, Or as the dial to the sun, Constant as gliding waters roll, Whose swelling tide obeys the moon: From every other charmer free, My life and love shall follow thee.
The lamb that flow’ry thyme devours, The tender dame, the kid pursues: Sweet Philomel in shady bowers, O verdant springs her noise renews; Each follows what they most require, So I pursue my heart’s desire.
​Nature may change her beauteous face, And vary as the seasons rise: As Winter to the Spring gives place, Summer th’ approach of Autumn flies: No change in love the seasons bring, Love only knows perpetual spring.
Devouring time, with stealing pace, Makes lofty oaks and cedars bow, And marble towers and walls of brass, In his rude march he levels low: But time, destroying far and wide, Love from the soul cannot divide.
Death only with his cruel dart, The gentle godhead can remove, And driving from the bleeding heart, To mingle with the blest above: Where known to all his kindred train, Love finds a lasting peace for pain.
Love, and her sister, the foul, Twin-horn together came, Love will the universe controul, When dying seasons lose the name, Divine abode shall lose his power, When time and death shall be no more.
BLYTHE JOCKEY.
MY Jockey is the blythest lad, that e’er young maid did woo: When he appears my heart is glad, for he is kind and true: He talks of love whene’er we meet, his words in rapture flow: ​Then tunes his pipe and sings so sweet, I have no power to go.
All other lassies he forsakes, and flies to me alone: At every fair or other wakes, I hear the maidens moan: He buys me toys and sweet meats too, And ribbons for my hair:
What swain was ever half so true, or half so kind and fair?
Where’er I go, I nothing fear, if Jockey is but by: For I alone am all his care, when ever danger’s nigh; He vows to wed next Whitsunday, and make me blest for life: Can I refuse, ye maidens, say to be young Jockey’s wife.
The GOOD WIFE.
THat man who for life is bless’d with a wife, is sure in a happy condition: Go things as they will, she sticks by him still, she’s comforter, friend and physician.
Pray where is the joy, to trifle and toy, yet dread some disaster from beauty; Sure sweet is the bless of a conjugal kiss, where love mingles pleasure with duty.
One extravagant whore will cost a man more, than twenty good wives that are saving, For wives they will spare that their children may
PRETTY MOLLY.
SPRING renewing all things gay, Nature’s dictates all obey: In each creature we may see The effect of love’s decree; Thus their state, Such their fate: Do not Molly, be to late.
Look around and see them play, All are wanton while they may: Why should precious time be lost, After summer comes a frost: All pursue nature’s due; Let us, Molly, do so too.
Flowers all around us blowing, Herds in every meadow lowing, Birds on every branch are wooing, Turtles all around us cooing: Hark they coo, see! they woo; Let us, Molly, do so too.
Mark! how kind yon swain and lass, Yonder fitting on the grass: See how earnestly he sues, While she, blushing, can’t refuse: See yon two, how they woo: Let us, Molly, do so too.
Mark that cloud above the plain, See! it seems to threaten rain: Herds and flocks do run together, Seeking shelter from the weather: Fear not you, I’ll be true: Let us, therefore, do so too.
MY HEART'S MY AIN.
'TIS nae very lang sinsyne, that I had a lad o’ my ain; But now he’s awa’ to anither, and left me a’ my lane; The lass he’s courting has siller, and I hae nane at a’: And 'tis nought but the love o' the tocher, that’s ta’en my laddie awa’.
But I'm blythe that my heart’s by ain, and I’ll keep it a’ my life, Until that I meet wi’ a lad wha has sense to wale a good wife: For though I say’t mysel, that shou’d na’ say’t, ’tis true, The lad that gets me for a wife, he’ll ne’er hae occasion to rue.
I gang sow clean and sow tosh, as a’ the neighbours can tell; Though I’ve seldom a gown on my back, but sic as I spin mysel, And when I am clad in my curtesy, I think mysel as bra’ As Susy, wi’ a’ her pearling, that’s ta’en my laddie awa’.
But I wish they were buckled together, and may they live happy for life! Though Willie does slight me and’s left me, the chiel he deserves a good wife. But, Oh! I'm blythe that I’ve miss’d him, as blythe as I weel can be: For ane that’s sae keen o’ the siller, will never agree wi’ me.
​But as the truth is, I am hearty, I hate to be scrimpit or scant: The wee thing I hae, I’ll mak use o’t, and ne'er ane about me shall want, For I’m a good guide o’ the warld, I ken whan to haud and to gi’e; For whinging and cringing for siller, will never agree wi’ me.
Contentment, is better than riches, an’ he that has that has enough, The master is seldom so happy, as Robin who drives the plough: But if a young lad wad cast up, to mak me his partner for life: If the chiel has the sense to be happy, he’ll fa’ on his feet for a wife.
The FLOWERS of EDINBURGH.
MY love was once a bonny lad, he was the flower of all his kin; The absence of his bonny face has rent my tender heart in twain. I day nor night find no delight, in silent tears I still complain; And exclaim against my rival foes, that have ta’en from me my darling swain,
Despair and anguish fill my breast, since I have lost my blooming rose, I sigh and moan while others rest, his absence yields me no repose: To seek my love, I’ll range and rove, thro’ every grove and distant plain: ​Thus I’ll never cease but spend my days, to hear news from my darling swain.
There nothing strange in nature’s change, since parents show such cruelty: They caus’d my love from me to range, and know not to what destiny: The pretty kids and tender lambs, may cease to sport upon the plain: But I’ll mourn and lament in deep discontent, for the absence of my darling swain.
Kind Neptune, let me thee intreat, To send a fair and pleasant gale; Ye Dolphins sweet, upon me wait, for to convey me on your tail: Heavens bless my voyage with success, while crossing o’er the raging main; And send me safe to that distant shore, to meet my darling lovely swain.
All mirth and joy at our return, shall then abound from Tweed to Tay: The bells shall ring, and sweet birds sing, to grace and crown our nuptial day: Thus bless’d with charms in my love’s arms, my heart once more I will regain: Then i’ll range no more to a distant shore, but will enjoy my darling swain.
CHARMING SYLVIA.
SYLVIA, Sylvia, Sylvia, one day, She dress’d herself in man’s array, With a brace of pistols by her side, To meet her true love, to meet her true love away did ride.
​She met her true love on the plain, And boldly bade him for to stand, Stand and deliver she did cry, Or else this moment you shall die.
This put her true love in surprise, He knew her not being in disguise: She boldly made him for to stand, And give gold and watch at her command.
When she had robb’d him of his store, She said, kind Sir, there’s one thing more A diamond-ring I see you have: Deliver it, and your life I’ll save.
My diamond-ring, I a token wear. My life I’ll lose before it i’ll spare: Being tender-hearted like a dove. She rode away Irom her true love.
As they walk’d in the garden green, Where like two lovers they’d often been: He spy’d his watch hang by her clothes, Which made turn blush like any rose.
What blush you at, you silly thing? I thought to’ve got your diamond ring, 'Twas I that robb’d you on the plain, So take your gold and your watch again.
Then to the church they did repair. Where these two lovers married were; Young Jamie and his Sylvia gay, In joy and mirth did spend the day.
She rose and loot me in.
THE silent night her sable wore, and gloomy were the skies. ​Of glitt’ring stars appear’d no more than those in Nelly’s eyes; When at her father’s gate I knock’d, where I had often been, She, shrouded only with her smock, arose and loot me in.
Fast lock’d within her close embrace, she trembling stood asham’d: Her swelling breast and glowing face, at every touch inflam’d. My eager passion I obey'd, resolv’d the sort to win: And her fond heart was soon betray’d to yield and let me in.
Then, then, beyond expressing, transporting was the joy, I knew no greater blessing, to blest a man was I: And she all ravish’d with delight, bid me oft come again; And kindly vow’d that every night she’d rise and let me in.
But ah! at last she prov’d wi’ bairn, and sighing sat, and dull: And I, that was as much concern’d look’d e’en just like a fool: Her lovely eyes with tears ran o’er: repenting her rash sin, She sigh’d and curs’d the fatal hour that e’er she loot me in.
But who could cruelly deceive, or from such beauty part! ​I lov’d her so, I could not leave the charmer of my heart; But wedded, and conceal’d the crime; thus all was well again: And now she thanks the happy time, she rose and loot me in.
The CHAMBER-MAID.
NOT far from town a country ’squire, an open hearted blade, Had long conceiv’d a strong desire to kiss his chamber-maid.
One summer’s eve, quite full of glee, he took her to the shade, And underneath a mulberry-tree, he kiss’d his chamber-maid.
The parson’s wife from window high, the am’rous pair survey’d, And strongly wish’d, none can deny, she’d been the chamber-maid.
The sport being o’er, poor Betsy cry’d, dear Sir, I’m much afraid: That woman there, will tell your spouse, that you have kiss’d her maid.
A lucky thought the ’squire conceiv’d, that she might not upbraid; And instantly his spouse he brought where he had kiss’d his maid.
There underneath the mulberry-tree, her ladyship he laid: And there most sweetly kiss’d was she, just like her chamber-maid.
​Next morning came the Parson’s Wife, for scandal was her trade: I saw your spouse, ma’am on my life, great with your chamber-maid.
When! where! and how! I’ll straight discharge the jade: 'Twas underneath the mulberry-tree he kis’d his chamber-maid.
This scandal, cry’d her Ladyship, shall not my spouse degrade: 'Tas I myself there made a slip, and not my chamber-maid.
Both parties parted in a pet, believing nought was said; And Betsy keeps her place as yet, the pretty chamber-maid.
JOCKEY to the FAIR.
'TWAS on the morn of sweet May day, When nature painted all things gay; Taught birds to sing and lambs to play, And gild the meadows fair; Young Jockey, early on the morn, Arose and tript it o’er the lawn, His Sunday’s coat the youth put on, For Jenny had vow’d away to run, With jockey to the Fair. For Jenny had vow’d, &c.
The chearful parish-bell had rung, With eager steps he trudg’d along, With flow’ry garlands round him hung, Which shepherds us’d to wear: ​He tapt the window, Haste my dear: Jenny, impatient, cry’d, Who’s there? ’Tis I, my love, and no one near, Step gently down, you’ve nought to fear, With, Jockey to the fair. Step gently, &c.
My dad and mammy’s fast asleep, My brother’s up and with the sheep, And will you still your promise keep, Which I have heard you swear: And will you ever constant prove? I will, by all the Powers above, And ne’er, deceive my charming dove: Dispel those doubts, and haste my love, With Jockey to the Fair. Dispel those, &c.
Behold the ring, the shepherd cry’d, Will Jenny be my charming bride? Let Cupid be our happy guide, And Hymen meet us there. Then Jockey did his vows renew, He wou’d be constant wou’d be true: His word was pledg’d away she flew, O’er cowslips tipt with balmy dew, With Jockey to the Fair With Jockey, &c.
In raptures meet the joyful train, Their gay companions blythe and young, Each join the dance, each join the throng, To hail the happy pair:
In turns there’s none so fond as they, They bless the kind propitious day, The smiling morn of blooming May, When lovely Jenny ran away With Jockey to the Fair. When lovely Jenny, &c.
A sellect Collection of LOVE TOASTS, and SENTIMENTS, &c.
FRUGALITY without meanness. May temptation never conquer virtue. May virtue always prove victorious. Success to the Lover, and honour to the brave; Health to the sick, and freedom to the slave. Life to the man who has courage to lose it; Wealth to the man who has spirit to use it. May we be beloved by those whom we love. May we always have a friend and know his value. May all great men be good & all good men great. May the honest heart never feel distress. Perpetual spring to friendship, youth and love. May we never want a friend and a bottle to give him. The woman we love and the friend we can trust. May we have in our arms whom we love in our hearts. Success to our hopes & enjoyment to our wishes. May we kiss whom we please, and please whom we kiss. Community, Unity, Navigation and Trade. More friends and less need of them. Provision to the unprovided. All true hearts and sound bottoms. May we please and be pleased. All we wish and all we want. Love and opportunity. To all the docks and dock-yards, that man the Navy of Great Britain.
GLASGOW, Printed by J. and M. Robertson, Saltmarket, 1806.
This work was published before January 1, 1929, and is in the public domain worldwide because the author died at least 100 years ago.
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