# The History of the Adventures of Joseph Andrews and his Friend, Mr. Abraham Abrams/Book III, Chapter V

CHAPTER V.
_A disputation on schools held on the road between Mr Abraham Adams and
Joseph; and a discovery not unwelcome to them both._
Our travellers, having well refreshed themselves at the gentleman's
house, Joseph and Fanny with sleep, and Mr Abraham Adams with ale and
tobacco, renewed their journey with great alacrity; and pursuing the
road into which they were directed, travelled many miles before they
met with any adventure worth relating. In this interval we shall
present our readers with a very curious discourse, as we apprehend it,
concerning public schools, which passed between Mr Joseph Andrews and
Mr Abraham Adams.
They had not gone far before Adams, calling to Joseph, asked him, "If
he had attended to the gentleman's story?" He answered, "To all the
former part."--"And don't you think," says he, "he was a very unhappy
man in his youth?"--"A very unhappy man, indeed," answered the other.
"Joseph," cries Adams, screwing up his mouth, "I have found it; I have
discovered the cause of all the misfortunes which befel him: a public
school, Joseph, was the cause of all the calamities which he
afterwards suffered. Public schools are the nurseries of all vice and
immorality. All the wicked fellows whom I remember at the university
were bred at them.--Ah, Lord! I can remember as well as if it was but
yesterday, a knot of them; they called them King's scholars, I forget
why--very wicked fellows! Joseph, you may thank the Lord you were not
bred at a public school; you would never have preserved your virtue as
you have. The first care I always take is of a boy's morals; I had
rather he should be a blockhead than an atheist or a presbyterian.
What is all the learning in the world compared to his immortal soul?
What shall a man take in exchange for his soul? But the masters of
great schools trouble themselves about no such thing. I have known a
lad of eighteen at the university, who hath not been able to say his
catechism; but for my own part, I always scourged a lad sooner for
missing that than any other lesson. Believe me, child, all that
gentleman's misfortunes arose from his being educated at a public
school."
"It doth not become me," answered Joseph, "to dispute anything, sir,
with you, especially a matter of this kind; for to be sure you must be
allowed by all the world to be the best teacher of a school in all our
county." "Yes, that," says Adams, "I believe, is granted me; that I may
without much vanity pretend to--nay, I believe I may go to the next
county too--but _gloriari non est meum_."--"However, sir, as you are
pleased to bid me speak," says Joseph, "you know my late master, Sir
Thomas Booby, was bred at a public school, and he was the finest
gentleman in all the neighbourhood. And I have often heard him say, if
he had a hundred boys he would breed them all at the same place. It was
his opinion, and I have often heard him deliver it, that a boy taken
from a public school and carried into the world, will learn more in one
year there than one of a private education will in five. He used to say
the school itself initiated him a great way (I remember that was his
very expression), for great schools are little societies, where a boy
of any observation may see in epitome what he will afterwards find in
the world at large."--"_Hinc illae lachrymae_: for that very reason,"
quoth Adams, "I prefer a private school, where boys may be kept in
innocence and ignorance; for, according to that fine passage in the
play of Cato, the only English tragedy I ever read--
"Who would not rather preserve the purity of his child than wish him to
attain the whole circle of arts and sciences? which, by the bye, he may
learn in the classes of a private school; for I would not be vain, but I
esteem myself to be second to none, _nulli secundum_, in teaching these
things; so that a lad may have as much learning in a private as in a
public education."--"And, with submission," answered Joseph, "he may get
as much vice: witness several country gentlemen, who were educated
within five miles of their own houses, and are as wicked as if they had
known the world from their infancy. I remember when I was in the stable,
if a young horse was vicious in his nature, no correction would make him
otherwise: I take it to be equally the same among men: if a boy be of a
mischievous wicked inclination, no school, though ever so private, will
ever make him good: on the contrary, if he be of a righteous temper, you
may trust him to London, or wherever else you please--he will be in no
danger of being corrupted. Besides, I have often heard my master say
that the discipline practised in public schools was much better than
that in private."--"You talk like a jackanapes," says Adams, "and so did
your master. Discipline indeed! Because one man scourges twenty or
thirty boys more in a morning than another, is he therefore a better
disciplinarian? I do presume to confer in this point with all who have
taught from Chiron's time to this day; and, if I was master of six boys
only, I would preserve as good discipline amongst them as the master of
the greatest school in the world. I say nothing, young man; remember I
say nothing; but if Sir Thomas himself had been educated nearer home,
and under the tuition of somebody--remember I name nobody--it might have
been better for him:--but his father must institute him in the knowledge
of the world. _Nemo mortalium omnibus horis sapit_." Joseph, seeing him
run on in this manner, asked pardon many times, assuring him he had no
intention to offend. "I believe you had not, child," said he, "and I am
not angry with you; but for maintaining good discipline in a school; for
this."--And then he ran on as before, named all the masters who are
recorded in old books, and preferred himself to them all. Indeed, if
this good man had an enthusiasm, or what the vulgar call a blind side,
it was this: he thought a schoolmaster the greatest character in the
world, and himself the greatest of all schoolmasters: neither of which
points he would have given up to Alexander the Great at the head of
his army.
Adams continued his subject till they came to one of the beautifullest
spots of ground in the universe. It was a kind of natural amphitheatre,
formed by the winding of a small rivulet, which was planted with thick
woods, and the trees rose gradually above each other by the natural
ascent of the ground they stood on; which ascent as they hid with their
boughs, they seemed to have been disposed by the design of the most
skilful planter. The soil was spread with a verdure which no paint could
imitate; and the whole place might have raised romantic ideas in elder
minds than those of Joseph and Fanny, without the assistance of love.
Here they arrived about noon, and Joseph proposed to Adams that they
should rest awhile in this delightful place, and refresh themselves with
some provisions which the good-nature of Mrs Wilson had provided them
with. Adams made no objection to the proposal; so down they sat, and,
pulling out a cold fowl and a bottle of wine, they made a repast with a
cheerfulness which might have attracted the envy of more splendid
tables. I should not omit that they found among their provision a little
paper containing a piece of gold, which Adams imagining had been put
there by mistake, would have returned back to restore it; but he was at
last convinced by Joseph that Mr Wilson had taken this handsome way of
furnishing them with a supply for their journey, on his having related
the distress which they had been in, when they were relieved by the
generosity of the pedlar. Adams said he was glad to see such an instance
of goodness, not so much for the conveniency which it brought them as
for the sake of the doer, whose reward would be great in heaven. He
likewise comforted himself with a reflection that he should shortly have
an opportunity of returning it him; for the gentleman was within a week
to make a journey into Somersetshire, to pass through Adams's parish,
and had faithfully promised to call on him; a circumstance which we
thought too immaterial to mention before; but which those who have as
great an affection for that gentleman as ourselves will rejoice at, as
it may give them hopes of seeing him again. Then Joseph made a speech on
charity, which the reader, if he is so disposed, may see in the next
chapter; for we scorn to betray him into any such reading, without first
giving him warning.