# The Great American Fraud/Chapter 6

Reprinted from Collier's Weekly, Feb. 17, 1906.
VI. - THE FUNDAMENTAL FLAKES.
_________
Advertising and testimonials are respectively the aggressive and defensive forces of the Great American Fraud. Without the columns of the newspapers and magazines wherein to exploit themselves, a great majority of the patent medicines would peacefully and blessedly fade out of existence. Nearly all the world of publications is open to the swindler, the exceptions being the high-class magazines and a very few independent spirited newspapers. The strongholds of the fraud are dailies, great and small, the cheap weeklies and the religious press. According to the estimate of the prominent advertising firm, above 90 per cent. of the earning capacity of the prominent nostrums is represented by their advertising. And all this advertising is based on the well-proven theory of the public's pitiable ignorance and gullibility in the vitally important matter of health.
Study the medicine advertising in your morning paper, and you will find yourself in a veritable goblin-realm of fakery, peopled with monstrous myths. Here is an amulet in the form of an electric belt, warranted to restore youth and rigor to the senile; yonder a magic ring or mysterious inhaler, or a bewitched foot-plaster which will draw the pangs of rheumatism from the tortured body "or your money back;" and again some beneficent wizard in St. Louis promises with a secret philtre to charm away deadly cancer, while in the next column a firm of magi in Denver proposes confidently to exorcise the demon of incurable consumption without ever seeing the patient. Is it credible that a supposedly civilized nation should accept such stuff as gospel? Yet these exploitations cited above, while they are extreme, differ only in degree from nearly all patent-medicine advertising. Ponce de Leon, groping toward that dim fountain whence youth springs eternal, might believe that he had found his goal in the Peruna factory, the Liquozone "laboratory" or the Vitæ-Ore plant; his thousands of descendants in this century of enlightenment painfully drag themselves along poisoned trails, following a will-o'-the-wisp that dances above the open graves.
Newspaper Accomplices.
If there is no limit to the gullibility of the public on the one hand, there is apparently none to the cupidity of the newspapers on the other. As the Proprietary Association of America is constantly setting forth in veiled warnings, the press takes an enormous profit from patent-medicine advertising. Mr. Hearst's papers alone reap a harvest of more than half a million dollars per annum from this source. The Chicago Tribune, which treats nostrum advertising in a spirit of independence, and sometimes with scant courtesy, still receives more than $80,000 a year in medical patronage. Many of the lesser journals actually live on patent medicines. What wonder that they are considerate of these profitable customers! Pin a newspaper owner down to the issue of fraud in the matter, and he will take refuge in the plea that his advertisers and not himself are responsible for what appears in the advertising columns. Caveat emptor is the implied superscriptions above this department. The more shame to those publications ​which prostitute their news and editorial departments to their greed. Here are two samples, one from the Cleveland Plain-Dealer, the other from a temperance weekly:
CURES CATARRH AND ASTHMA.
FOREIGN SPECIALISTS GIVE REASON FOR
MARVELOUS SUCCESS OF NEW
REMEDY, ASCATCO.
"Vienna, September 9. - The astonishing success of the Ascatco treatment for catarrh, asthma and bronchitis is wholly attributed to its marvelous action on the mucous membranes, and having no distributing influence on other organs of the body.
"It is claimed by European savants, from whom this remedy emanated, that five hundred drops will cure permanently even the most obstinate cases. The dose is small and pleasant to take, being only seven drops twice daily. The Austrian dispensary, 32 West Twenty-fifth Street, New York, N.Y., will send a trial treatment of Ascatco free by mail to all sufferers who have not tested the wonderful curative powers of the specific."
THE AMERICAN ISSUE, AN ADVOCATE OF
CHRISTIAN PATRIOTISM.
OFFICIAL ORGAN OF THE ANTI-SALOON
LEAGUE, COLUMBUS, OHIO.
"Paul said: 'Prove all things; hold fast that which is good.' Vitæ-Ore has been before the American people for three decades and is still growing in popularity.
"They have proven and hold fast to it. Read about it on last page. You can test and prove it without a penny risk."
Green Goods "Cable News."
The "Ascatco" advertisement, which the Plain-Dealer prints as a cablegram, without any distinguishing mark to designate it as an advertisement, of course, emanates from the office of the nostrum, and is a fraud, as the Plain-Dealer well knew when it accepted payment, and became partner to the swindle by deceiving its readers. The Vitæ-Ore "editorial" appears by virtue of a full-page advertisement of this extraordinary fake in the same issue.
Whether, because church-going people are more trusting, and therefore more easily befooled than others, or from some more obscure reason, many of the religious papers fairly reek with patent-medicine fakes. Take, for instance, the Christian Endeavor World, which is the undenominational organ of a large, powerful and useful organization, unselfishly working toward the betterment of society. A subscriber who recently complained of certain advertisements received the following reply from the business manager of the publication:
"Dear Sir: - Your letter of the 4th comes to me for reply. Appreciating the good spirit in which you write, let me assure you that, to the best of our knowledge and belief, we are not publishing any fraudulent or unworthy medicine advertising. We decline every year thousands of dollars' worth of patent-medicine advertising that we think is either fraudulent or misleading. You would be surprised, very likely, if you could know of the people of high intelligence and good character who are benefited by these ​medicines. We have taken a great deal of pains to make particular inquiries of our subscribers with respect to this question, and a very large percentage of them are devoted to one or more well-know patent medicines, and regard them as household remedies. Trusting that you will be able to understand that we are acting according to our best and sincerest judgment, I remain, your very truly,
                         "The Golden Rule Company,
                      "George W. Coleman, Business Manager."
Running through half a dozen recent issues of the Christian Endeavor World, I find nineteen medical advertisements of, at best, dubious nature. Assuming that the business management of the Christian Endeavor World represents normal intelligence, I would like to ask whether it accepts the statement that a pair of "magic foot drafts" applied to the bottom of the feet will cure any and every kind of rheumatism in any part of the body? Further, if the advertising department is genuinely interest in declining "fraudulent or misleading" copy, I would call their attention to the ridiculous claims of Dr. Shoop's medicines, which "cure" almost every disease; to two hair removers, one an "Indian Secret," the other an "accidental discovery," both either fakes or dangerous; to the lying claims of Hall's Catarrh Cure, that it is "a positive cure for catarrh" in all its stages; to "Syrup of Figs," which is not a fig syrup, but a preparation of senna; to Dr. Kilmer's Swamp Root, of which the principal medicinal constituent is alcohol; and, finally, to Dr. By's Oil Cure for cancer, a particularly cruel swindle on unfortunates suffering from an incurable malady. All of these, with other matter, which for the sake of decency I do not care to detail in these columns, appear in recent issues of the Christian Endeavor World, and are respectfully submitted to its management and its readers.
Quackery and Religion.
The Baptist Watchman of Oct. 12, 1905, prints an editorial defending the principal of patent medicines. It would be interesting to know whether the back page of the number has any connection with the editorial. This page is given up to an illustrated advertisement of Vitæ-Ore, one of the boldest fakes in the whole Frauds' Gallery. Vitæ-Ore claims to be a mineral mined from "an extinct mineral spring," and to contain free iron, free sulphur and free magnesium. It contains no free iron, no free sulphur, and no free magnesium. It announces itself as "a certain and never-failing cure" for rheumatism and Bright's disease, dropsy, blood poisoning, nervous prostration and general debility, among other maladies. Whether it is, as asserted, mined from an extinct spring or bucketed from a sewer, has no bearing on its utterly fraudulent character. There is no "certain and never-failing cure" for the diseases in its list, and when the Baptist Watchman sells itself to such an exploitation it becomes partner to a swindle not only on the pockets of its readers, but on their health as well. In the same issue I find "Piso's Cure for Consumption," "Bye's Cancer Cure," "Mrs. M. Summer's Female Remedy," "Winslow's Soothing Syrup," and "Juven Pills," somewhat disguised here, but in other mediums openly a sexual weakness "remedy."
A correspondent sends me clippings from The Christian Century, leading off with an interesting editorial entitled "Our Advertisers," from which I quote in part:
"We take pleasure in calling the attention of our readers to the high grade of advertising which The Christian Century commands. We shall continue to advertise only such companies as we know to be thoroughly reliable. During the past year we have refused thousands of dollars' ​worth of advertising which other religious journals are running, but which is rated 'objectionable' by the better class of periodicals. Compare our advertising columns with the columns of any other purely religious journal, and let us know what you think of the character of our advertising patrons."
Whether the opinion of a non-subscriber will interest The Christian Century I have no means of knowing, but I will venture it. My opinion is that a considerable proportion of its advertisements are such as any right-minded and intelligent publisher should be ashamed to print, and that if its readers accept its indorsement of the advertising columns they
PERUNA'S WAY OF PURCHASING TESTIMONIALS.
will have a very heavy indictment to bring against it. Three "cancer cures," a dangerous "heart cure," a charlatan eye doctor, Piso's Consumption Cure, Dr. Sthoop's Rheumatism Cure and Liquozone make up a pretty fair "Frauds' Gallery" for the delectation of The Christian Century's readers.
As a convincing argument, many nostrums guarantee, not a cure, as they would have the public believe, but a reimbursement if the medicine is unsatisfactory. Liquozone does this, and faithfully carries out its agreement. Electro-gen, a new "germicide," which has stolen Liquozone's advertising scheme almost word for word, also promises this. Dr. Shoop's agreement ​is so worded that the unsatisfied customer is likely to have considerable trouble in getting his money back. Other concerns send their "remedies" free on trial, among these being the ludicrous "magic foot drafts" referred to above. At first thought it would seem that only a cure would bring profit to the makers. But the fact is that most diseases tend to cure themselves by natural means, and the delighted and deluded patient, ascribing the relief to the "remedy," which really has nothing to do with it, sends on his grateful dollar. Where the money is already paid, most people are too inert to undertake the effort of getting it back. It is the easy American way of accepting a swindle as a sort of joke, which makes for the nostrum readers ready profits.
Safe Rewards.
Then there is the "reward for the proof" that the proprietary will not perform the wonders advertised. The Liquozone Company offer $1,000, I believe, for any germ that Liquozone will not kill. This is a pretty safe offer, because there are no restrictions as to the manner in which the unfortunate germ might be maltreated. If the matter came to an issue, the defendants might put their bacillus in the Liquozone bottle and freeze him solid. If that didn't end him, they could boil the ice and save their money, as thus far no germ has been discovered which can survive the process of being made into soup. Nearly all of the Hall Catarrh Cure advertisements offer a reward of $100 for any case of catarrh which the nostrum fails to cure. It isn't enough, though one hundred times that amount might be worth while; for who doubts that Mr. F.J. Cheney, inventor of the "red clause," would fight for his cure through every court, exhausting the prospective $100 reward of his opponent in the first round? How hollow the "guarantee" pretense is, is shown by a clever scheme devise by Radam, the quack, years ago, when Shreveport was stricken with yellow fever. Knowing that his offer could not be accepted, he proposed to the United States Government that he should eradicate the epidemic by destroying all the germs with Radam's Microbe Killer, offering to deposit $10,000 as a guarantee. Of course, the Government declined on the ground that it had no power to accept such an offer. Meantime, Radam got a lot of free advertising, and his fortune was made.
No little stress is laid on "personal advice" by the patent-medicine companies. This may be, according to the statements of the firm, from their physician or from some special expert. As a matter of fact, it is almost invariably furnished by a $10-a-week typewriter, following out one of a number of "form" letters prepared in bulk for the "personal-inquiry" dupes. Such is the Lydia E. Pinkham method. The Pinkham Company writes me that it is entirely innocent of any intent to deceive people into believing that Lydia E. Pinkham is still alive, and that it has published in several cases statements regarding her demise. It is true that a number of years ago a newspaper forced the Pinkham concern into a defensive admission of Lydia E. Pinkham's death, but since then the main purpose of the Pinkham advertising has been to befool the feminine public into believing that their letters go to a woman - who died nearly twenty years ago of one of the diseases, it it said, which her remedy claims to cure.
The Immortal Mrs. Pinkham
True, the newspaper appeal is always "Write to Mrs. Pinkham," and this is technically a saving clause, as there is a Mrs. Pinkham, widow of the son of Lydia E. Pinkham. What sense of shame she might be supposed to suffer in the perpetration of an obvious and public fraud is presumably ​salved by the large profits of the business. The great majority of the gulls who "write to Mrs. Pinkham" suppose themselves to be addressing Lydia E. Pinkham, and their letters are not even answered by the present proprietor of the name, but by a corps of hurried clerks and typewriters.
You get the same results when you write to Dr. Hartman, of Peruna, for personal guidance. Dr. Hartman himself told me that he took no active part now in the conduct of the Peruna Company. If he sees the letters addressed to him at all, it is by chance. "Dr. Kilmer," of Swamp-Root fame, wants you to write to him about your kidneys. There is no Dr. Kilmer in the Swamp-Root concern, and has not been for many years. Dr. T.A. Slocum, who writes you so earnestly and piously about taking care of your consumption in time, is a myth. The whole "personal medical advice" business is managed by rote, and the letter you get "special to your ease" has been printed and signed before your inquiry ever reached the shark who gets your money.
An increasingly common pitfall is the letter in the newspapers from some sufferer who has been saved from disease and wants you to write and get the prescription free. A conspicuous instance of this is "A Notre Dame Lady's Appeal" to sufferers from rheumatism and also from female trouble. "Mrs. Summers," of Notre Dame, Ill., whose picture in the papers represents a fat Sister of Charity, with the wan, uneasy expression of one who feels that her dinner isn't digesting properly, may be a real lady, but I suspect she wears a full beard and talks in a bass voice, because my letter of inquiry to her was answered by the patent-medicine firm of Vanderhoof & Co., who inclosed some sample tablets and wanted to sell me more. There are many others of this class. It is safe to assume that every advertising altruist who pretends to give out free prescriptions is really a quack medicine firm in disguise.
One instance of bad faith to which the nostrum patron renders himself liable: It is asserted that these letters of inquiry to the patent-medicine field are regarded as private. "All correspondence held strictly private and sacredly confidential," advertises Dr. R.V. Pierce, of the Golden Medical Discovery, etc. A Chicago firm of letter brokers offers to send me 50,000 Dr. Pierce order blanks at $2 a thousand for thirty days; or I can get terms on Ozomulsion, Theodore Noel (Vitæ-Ore, Dr. Steven's Nervous Debility Cure, Cactus Cure, women's regulators, etc.
With advertisements in the medical journals the public is concerned only indirectly, it is true, but none the less vitally. Only doctors read these exploitations, but if they accept certain of them and treat their patients on the strength of the mendacious statements it is at the peril of the patients. Take, for instance, the Antikamnia advertising which appears in most of the high-class medical journals, and which includes the following statements:
          "Do not depress the heart.
          Do not produce the habit.
          Are accurate - safe - sure."
These three lines, reproduced as they occur in the medical journals, contain five distinct and separate lies - a triumph of condensed mendacity unequaled, so far as I know, in the "cure all" class. For an instructive parallel here are two claims made by Duffy's Malt Whiskey, one taken from a medical journal, and hence "ethical," the other transcribed from a daily paper, and therefore to be condemned by all medical men.
Puzzle: Which is the ethical and which the unethical advertisement? ​
    "It is the only cure and preventative [sic] of consumption, pneumonia, grip, bronchitis, coughs, colds, malaria, low fevers and all wasting, weakening, diseased conditions."
    "Cures general debility, overwork, la grippe, colds, bronchitis, consumption, malaria, dyspepsia, depression, exhaustion and weakness from whatever cause."
All the high-class medical publications accept the advertising of "McArthur's Syrup of Hypophosphites," which uses the following statement: "It is the enthusiastic conviction of many (physicians) that its effect is truly specific." That looks to me suspiciously like a "consumption cure" shrewdly expressed in pseudo-ethical terms.
The Germicide Family.
Zymoticine, if one may believe various medical publications, "will prevent microbe proliferation in the blood streams, and acts as an efficient eliminator of those germs and their toxins which are already present." Translating this from its technical language, I am forced to the conviction that Zymoticine is half-brother to Liquozone, and if the latter is illegitimate at least both are children of Beelzebub, father of all frauds. Of the same family are the "ethicals" Acetozone and Keimol, as shown by their germicidal claims.
Again, I find exploited to the medical profession, through its own organs, a "sure cure for dropsy." "Hygeia presents her latest discovery," declares the advertisement, and fortifies the statement with a picture worthy of Swamp-Root or Lydia Pinkham. Every intelligent physician knows that there is no sure cure for dropsy. The alternative implication is that the advertiser hopes to get his profits by deluding the unintelligent of the profession, and that the publications which print his advertisement are willing to hire themselves out to the swindle.
In one respect some of the medical journals are far below the average of the newspapers, and on a par with the worst of the "religious" journals. They offer their reading space for sale. Here is an extract from a letter from the Medical Mirror to a well-known "ethical firm:"
"Should you place a contract for this issue we shall publish a 300-word report in your interest in our reading columns."
Many other magazines of this class print advertisements as original reading matter calculated to deceive their subscribers.
Back of all patent medicine advertising stands the testimonial. Produce proofs that any nostrum can not in its nature perform the wonders that it boasts, and its retort is to wave aloft its careful horde of letters and cry:
"We rest on the evidence of those we have cured."
The crux of the matter lies in the last word. Are the writers of those letters really cured? What is the value of their testimonials? Are they genuine? Are they honest? Are they, in their nature and from their source, entitled to such weight as would convince a reasonable mind?
Three distinct types suggest themselves: The word of grateful acknowledgement from a private citizen, couched in such terms as to be readily available for advertising purposes: the encomium from some person in public life, and the misspelled, illiterate epistle which is from its nature so unconvincing that it never gets into print, and which outnumbers the other two classes a hundred to one. First of all, most nostrums make a point of the mass of evidence. Thousands of testimonials, they declare, ​just as valuable for their purposes as those they print, are in their files. This si not true. I have taken for analysis, as a fair sample, the "World's Dispensary Medical Book," published by the proprietors of Pierce's Favorite Prescription, the Golden Medical Discovery, Pleasant Pellets, the Pierce Hospital, etc. As the dispensers of several nostrums, and because of their long career in the business, this firm should be able to show as large a collection of favorable letters as any proprietary concern.
Overworked Testimonials.
In their book, judiciously scattered, I find twenty-six letters twice printed, four letters thrice printed, and two letter produced four times. Yet the compilers of the book "have to regret" (editorially) that they can "find room only for this comparatively small number in this volume." Why repeat those they have if this is true? If enthusiastic indorsements poured in on the patent medicine people, the Duffy's Malt Whiskey advertising management would hardly be driven to purchasing its letters from the very aged and from disreputable ministers of the gospel. If all the communications were as convincing as those published, the Peruna Company would not have to employ an agent to secure publishable letters, nor the Liquozone Company indorse across the face of a letter from a Mrs. Benjamin Charteris" "Can change as we see fit." Man, in fact I believe I may say almost all, of the newspaper-exploited testimonials are obtained at any expense to the firm. Agents are employed to secure them. This costs money. Druggists get a discount for forwarding letters from their customers. This costs money. Persons willing to have their picture printed get a dozen photographs for themselves. This costs money. Letters of inquiry answered by givers of testimonials bring a price - 25 cents per letter, usually. Here is a document sent out periodically by the Peruna Company to keep in line its "unsolicited" beneficiaries
"As you are aware, we have your testimonial to our remedy. It has been some time since we have heard from you, and so we thought best to make inquiry as to your present state of health and whether you still occasionally make use of Peruna. We also want to make sure that we have your present street address correctly, and that you are making favorable answers to such letters of inquiry which your testimonial may occasion. Remember that we allow 25 cents for each letter of inquiry. You have only to send the letter you receive, together with a copy of your reply to the same, and we will forward you 25 cents for each pair of letters.
"We hope you are still a friend of Peruna and that our continued use of your testimonial will be agreable to you. We are inclosing stamped envelope for reply. Very sincerely yours,
             "The Peruna Drug Manufacturing Company,"
                                           "Per Carr."
And here is an account of another typical method of collecting this sort of material, the writer being a young New Orleans man, who answered an advertisement in a local paper, offering profitable special work to a newspaper man with spare time:
I found the advertiser to be a woman, the coarseness of whose features was only equaled by the vulgarity of her manners and speech, and whose self-assertiveness was in proportion to her bulk. She proposed that I set about securing testimonials to the excellent qualities of Peruna, which she pronounced 'Pay-Runa,' for which I was to receive a fee of $5 to $10, according to the prominence of 'the guy' from whom I obtained it. This I declined ​flatly. She then inquired whether or not I was a member of any social organizations or clubs in the city, and receiving a positive answer she offered me $3 for a testimonial, including the statement that Pay-Runa had been used by the members of the Southern Athletic Club with good effects, and raised it to $5 before I left.
"This female exhibited to me what purported to be a letter of introduction from ex-Governor {{w:Jim Hogg|Hogg}}, of Texas, 'To whom it may concern,' and
MEDICAL JOURNALISTIC ETHICS.
A frank proposition to sell a nostrum favorable editorial mention.
among other interesting documents sheets of letterpaper signed in blank by happy users of Pay-Runa, which she was to fill out to suit her herself.
No Questions Desired.
"Upon my asking her what her business was before she undertook the Pay-Runa work, she became very angry. Now, when a female is both very large and very large, the best thing for a small, thin young man to do is to leave her to her thoughts and the expression thereof. I did it."
Testimonials obtained in this ​way are, in a sense, genuine; that is, the nostrum firm has documentary evidence that they were given; but it is hardly necessary to state that they are not honest. Often the handling of the material is very careless, as in the case of Doan's Kidney Pills, which ran an advertisement in a Southern city embodying a letter from a resident of that city who had been dead nearly a year. Cause of death, kidney disease.
In a former article I have touched on the matter of testimonials from public men. These are obtained through special agents, through hangers-on of the newspaper business who wheedle them out of congressmen or senators, and sometimes through agencies which make a specialty of that business. A certain Washington firm made a "blanket offer" to a nostrum company of a $100 joblot of testimonials, consisting of one De Wolf Hopper, one Sarah Bernhardt, and six "statesmen," one of them a United States senator. Whether they had Mr. Hopper and mms. Bernhardt under agreement or were simply dealing in futures I am unable to say, but the offer was made in business-like fashion. And the "divine Sarah" at least seems to be an easy subject for patent medicines, as her letters to them are by no means rare. Congressmen are notoriously easy to get, and senators are by no means beyond the range. There are several men now in the United States Senate who have, at one time or another, prostituted their names to the uses of fraud medicines, which they do not use and of which they know nothing. Naval officers seem to be easy marks. Within a few weeks a retired admiral of our navy has besmirched himself and his service by acting as pictorial sales agent for Peruna. If one carefully considers the "testimonials" of this class it will appear that few of the writers state that they have ever tried the nostrum. We may put down the "public man's" indorsement, then, as genuine (documentarily), but not honest. Certainly it can bear no weight with an intelligent reader.
Almost as eagerly sought for as this class of letter is the medical inodrsement. Medical testimony exploiting any medicine advertised in the lay press withers under investigation. In the Liquozone article of this series I showed how medical evidence is itself "doctored." This was an extreme instance, for Liquozone, under its original administration, exhibited less conscience in its methods than any of its competitors that I have encountered. Where the testimony itself is not distorted, it is obtained under false pretenses or it comes from men of no standing in the profession. Some time ago Duffy's Malt Whiskey sent out an agent to get testimonials from hospitals. He got them. How he got them is told in a letter from the physician in charge of a prominent Pennsylvania institution:
"A very nice appearing man called here one day and sent in his card, bearing the name of Dr. Blank (I can't recall the name, but wish I could), a graduate of Vermont University. he was a smooth an article as I have ever been up against, and I have met a good many. He at once got down to business and began to talk of the hospitals he had visited, mentioning physicians whom I knew either personally or by reputation. He then brought out a lot of documents for me to peruse, all of which were bona fide affairs, from the various institutions, signed by the various physicians or resident physicians, setting forth the merits or use of 'Duffy's Malt Whiskey. He asked if I had every used it. I said yes, but very little, and was at the time using some, a fact, as I was sampling what he handed me. He then placed about a dozen small bottles, holding possibly two ounces, on the table, and said I should keep it, and he would send me two quarts free for use here as soon as he got back. ​
Getting a Testimonial from a Physician.
"He next asked me if I would give him a testimonial regarding Duffy's Whiskey. I said I did not do such things, as it was against my principles to do so. 'But this is not for publication,' he said. I replied that I had used but little of it, and found it only the same as any other whisky. He then asked if I was satisfied with the results as far as I had used it. I replied that I was. He then asked me to state that much, and I very foolishly said I would, on condition that it was not to be used as an advertisement, and he assured me it would not be used. I then, in a few words, said that 'I (or we) have used and are using Duffy's Malt Whiskey, and are satisfied with the results,' signing my name to the same. He left here, and what was my surprise to receive later on a booklet in which was my testimonial and many others, with cuts of hospitals ranging along with people who had reached 100 years by use of the whiskey, while seemingly all ailments save ringbone and spavin were being cured by this wonderful beverage. I was provoked, but was paid as I deserved for allowing a smooth tongue to deceive me. Duffy's Malt Whiskey has never been inside this place since that day and never will be while I have any voice to prevent it. The total amount used at the time and before was less than half a gallon."
This hospital is still used as a reference by the Duffy people.
Many of the ordinary testimonials which come unsolicited to the extensively advertised nostrums in great numbers are both genuine and honest. What of their value as evidence?
Some years ago, so goes a story familiar in the drug trade, the general agent for a large jobbing house declared that he could put out an article possessing not the slightest remedial or stimulant properties, and by advertising it skillfully so persuade people of its virtues that it would receive unlimited testimonials to the cure of any disease for which he might choose to exploit it. Challenged to a bet, he became a proprietary owner. Within a year he had won his wager with a collection of certified "cures" ranging from anemia to pneumonia. Moreover, he found his venture so profitable that he pushed it to the extent of thousands of dollars of profits. His "remedy" was nothing but sugar. I have heard "Kaskine" mentioned as the "cure" in the case. It answers the requirements, or did answer them at that time, according to an analysis by the Massachusetts State Board of Health, which shows that its purchasers had been paying $1 an ounce for pure granulated sugar. Whether "Kaskine" was indeed the subject of this picturesque bet, or whether it was some other harmless fraud, is immaterial to the point, which is that were the disease cures itself, as nearly all diseases do, the medicine gets the benefit of this vix medicatrix naturaæ - the natural corrective force which makes for normal health in every human organism. Obviously, the sugar testimonials can not be regarded as very weighty evidence.
Testimonials for a Magic Ring.
There is being advertised now a finger ring which by the mere wearing cures any form of rheumatism. The maker of that ring has genuine letters from people who believe that they have been cured it. Would any one other than a believer in witchcraft accept those statements? Yet they are just as "genuine" as the bulk of patent medicine letters and written in as good faith. A very small proportion of the gratuitous indorsements get into the newspapers, because, as I have said, they do not lend themselves ​well to advertising purposes. I have looked over the originals of hundreds of letters, and more than 90 per cent. of them - that is a very conservative estimate - are from illiterate and obviously ignorant people. Even those few that can be used are rendered suitable for publication only by careful editing. The geographical distribution is suggestive. Out of 100 specimens selected at random from the Pierce testimonials book, eighty-seven are from small, remote hamlets, whose very names are unfamiliar to the average man of intelligence. ONly five are from cities of more than 50,000 inhabitants. Now, Garden City, Kas; North Yamhill, Ore.; Theresa, Jefferson County N. Y.; Parkland, Ky., and Forest Hill, W. Va., may produce an excellent brand of Americanism, but one does not for a very high average of intelligence in such communities. Is it only a coincidence that the mountain districts of Kentucky, West Virginia and Tennessee, recognized as being the least civilized parts of the country, should furnish a number of testimonials, not only to Pierce, but to Peruna, Pain's Celery Compound and other brands, out of all proportion to their population? On page 61 is a group of Pierce enthusiasts and a group of Peruna witnesses. Should you, on the face of the exhibit, accept their advice on a matter wholly affecting your physical welfare? This is what the advertiser is asking you to do.
Secure as is the present control of the Proprietary Association over the newspapers, there is one point in which I believe almost any journal may be made to feel the force of public opinion, and that is the matter of common decency. Newspapers pride themselves on preserving a respectable moral standard in their news columns, and it would require no great pressure on the part of the reading public (which is surely immediately interested) to extend this standard to the advertising columns. I am referring now not only to the unclean sexual, venereal and abortion advertisements which deface the columns of a majority of papers, but also to the exploitation of several prominent proprietaries.
Recently a prominent Chicago physician was dining en famille with a friend who is the publisher of a rather important paper in a Western city. The publisher was boasting that he had so established the editorial and news policy of his paper that every line of it could be read without shame in the presence of any adult gathering.
"never anything gets in," he declared, " that I couldn't read at this table before my wife, son and daughter."
The visitor, a militant member of his profession, snuffed battle from afar. "Have the morning's issue brought," he said. Turning to the second page he began on Swift's Sure Specific, which was headed in large black type with the engaging caption, "Vile, Contagious Blood Poison." Before he had gone far the 19-year-old daughter of the family, obedient to a glance from the mother, had gone to answer the opportune ring at the telephone, and the publisher had grown very red in the face.
"I didn't mean the advertisements," he said.
"I did," said the visitor, curtly, and passed on to one of the extremely intimate, confidential and highly corporeal letters to the ghost of Lydia E. Pinkham, which are a constant ornament of the press. The publisher's son interrupted:
"I don't believe that was written for me to hear," he observed. "I'm too young - only 25, you know. Call me when you're through. I'll be out looking at the moon."
Relentlessly the physician turned the sheet and began on one of the Chattanooga Medical Company's physiological editorials, entitled "What ​Men Like in a Girl." For loathsome and gratuitous indecency, for leering appeal to their basest passions, this advertisement and the others of the Wine of Cardui series sound the depths. The hostess lasted through the second paragraph, when she fled, gasping.
The Readers Can Regulate Their Papers' Advertising Columns.
"Now," said the physician to his host, "what do you think of yourself?"
The publisher found no answer, but thereafter his paper was put under a censorship of advertising. Many dailies refuse such "copy" as this of Wine of Cardui. And here, I believe, is an opportunity for the entering wedge. If every subscriber to a newspaper who is interested in keeping his home free from contamination would protest and keep on protesting against advertising foulness of this nature, the medical advertiser would soon be restricted to the same limits of decency which other classes of merchandise accept as a matter of course, for the average newspaper publisher is quite sensitive to criticism from his readers. A recent instance came under my own notice in the case of the Auburn (N. Y.) Citizen, which bought out an old-established daily, taking over the contracts, among which was a large amount of low-class patent medicine advertising. The new proprietor, a man of high personal standards, assured his friends that no objectionable matter would be permitted in his columns. Shortly after the establishment of the new paper there appeared an advertisement of Juven Pills, referred to above. Protests from a number of subscribers followed. Investigation showed that a so-called "reputable" patent medicine firm had inserted this disgraceful paragraph under their contract. Further insertions of the offending matter were refused and the Hood Company meekly accepted the situation. Another central New York daily, the Utica Press, rejects such "copy" as seems to the manager indecent, and I have yet to hear of the paper's being sued for breach of contract. No perpetrator of unclean advertising can afford to go into court on this ground, because he knows that his matter is indefensible.
Our national quality of commercial shrewdness fails us when we go into the open market to purchase relief from suffering. The average American, when he sets out to buy a horse or a house or a box of cigars, is a model of caution. Show him testimonials from any number of prominent citizens and he would simple scoff. He will, perhaps, take the word of his life-long friend, or of the pastor of his church, but only after mature thought, fortified by personal investigation. Now observe the same citizen seeking to buy the most precious of all possessions, sound health. Anybody's word is good enough for him here. An admiral whose puerile vanity has betrayed him into a testimonial; an obliging and conscienceless senator; a grateful idiot from some remote hamlet; a renegade doctor or a silly woman who gets a bonus of a dozen photographs for her letter - any of these are sufficient to lure the hopeful patient to the purchase. he wouldn't buy a second-hand bicycle on the affidavit of any of them, but he will give up his dollar and take his chance of poison on a mere newspaper statement which he doesn't even investigate. Every intelligent newspaper publisher knows that the testimonials which he publishes are as deceptive as the advertising claims are false. Yet he salves his conscience with the fallacy that the moral responsibility is on the advertiser and the testimonial-giver. So it is, but the newspaper shares it. When an aroused public sentiment shall make our public men ashamed to lend themselves to this charlatanry, and shall enforce on the profession of journalism those standards of decency in the field of medical advertising which apply to other advertiser, the Proprietary Association ​of America will face a crisis more perilous than any threatened legislation. For printers' ink is the very life-blood of the noxious trade. Take from the nostrum vendors the means by which they influence the millions, and there will pass to the limbo of pricked bubbles a fraud whose flagrancy and impudence are of minor import compared to the cold-hearted greed with which it grinds out is profits from the sufferings of duped and eternally hopeful ignorance.