# A Real Pain

A Real Pain is a 2024 buddy road comedy-drama film about mismatched cousins who reunite for a tour through Poland to honor their beloved grandmother, but their old tensions resurface against the backdrop of their family history.
    Written and directed by Jesse Eisenberg.

## Dialogue

    [Benji is explaining to David how they can get through their train trip without paying]
    Benji: We stay moving, we stay light, we stay agile.
    David: Yeah.
    Benji: The conductor's gonna come through taking tickets. We tell him we're going to the bathroom.
    David: The bathroom. Okay.
    Benji: He gets to the back of the train, he starts heading towards the front looking for stragglers.
    David: Sorry, we're the stragglers?
    Benji: Yeah. By the time he gets to the front, the train's gonna be in the station and we're home free.
    David: This is so fucking stupid.
    Benji: Man, what's stupid is the corporatization of travel. Ensuring that the rich move around the world, propagate their elitist loins, while the poor stay cut off from society.
    David: That's great, we can argue Marxism while they're hauling us off to Siberia.
    Benji: Siberia is in Russia, Dave.
    David: This is ridiculous. Tickets are probably like twelve bucks.
    Benji: It's the principle of paying. We shouldn't have to pay for train tickets in Poland. This is our country.
    David: No, it's not. It was our country. They kicked us out 'cause they thought we were cheap.
    Benji: [in their hotel room] How the fuck are we supposed to smoke a joint in here? They fuckin' locked the windows. It's like a goddamn police state.
    David: Yo, man, I think I might just wanna crash. We've been up for like twenty-four hours.
    Benji: Don't. Don't tell me you're gonna sleep on me. This is our first night together in fuckin' years.
    David: I don't know. I'm exhausted, I haven't showered...
    Benji: You're exhausted? Dude, the weed's gonna help you sleep.
    David: Is it the kind that helps you sleep?
    Benji: No, it's the other kind.
    Marcia: David, we numb ourselves to avoid thinking about our impact.
    Eloge: Ignoring the proverbial slaughterhouse to enjoy the steak, as it were.
    Benji: Yes, Eloge! Damn, that's a good analogy.
    David: No, and I get that, I get all that, it just seems like maybe there's, like, a time and a place to grieve, and maybe it's not...
    Benji: Yo, Dave.
    David: What?
    Benji: We're on a fucking Holocaust tour. If now is not the time and place to grieve, to open up, I don't know what to tell you, man.
    Marcia: Last year my daughter married a very rich man.
    Benji: Oh, fuck.
    Marcia: And she's incapable of having a conversation with any depth anymore.
    Benji: Well, yeah, of course. Money's like fucking heroin for boring people.
    [having gotten drunk and made a fool of himself, Benji has just excused himself from his tour group's dinner table to use the restroom, leaving the group in awkward silence]
    David: Sorry about him.
    Eloge: No, no.
    Diane: What a troubled young man.
    Eloge: He wants to be good. You can see the spark. Do you know what I mean?
    Marcia: Yeah. Absolutely, Eloge.
    Mark: Forgive me if I don't see this magical spark.
    Diane: Oh, Mark, stop it. He's tormented, for whatever reason.
    Mark: Okay.
    Marcia: He's funny and he's charming under all the mishegoss.
    Diane: I feel bad for him.
    Marcia: Has he always been like this?
    David: Yeah. I mean, he's always been, like, up and down, you know? Like, he's sensitive, and he, like, sees people so clearly, you know? But then you say the wrong thing and, like, something switches. Or maybe it's not appropriate to talk about him.
    Marcia: No.
    Diane: No, what's not appropriate? You obviously got something going on between you and, uh - well, he's clearly in pain.
    David: Yeah, but isn't everyone in pain in some way? I mean, look at what happened to our families, look at where we came from. I mean, who isn't - you know, who isn't wrought?
    Mark: Well, you seem okay.
    David: I'm not, though. I'm not. I just, like, take a pill for my fuckin' OCD, you know, and I jog and I meditate and I go to work in the morning and I, like, come home at the end of the day, and I, like, move forward, you know, because I know that my pain is unexceptional, so I don't feel the need to, like, I don't know, burden everybody with it, you know?
    Mark, Eloge: Yeah.
    David: Yeah. God, I'm sorry.
    James: No, it's all - it's all right, David.
    Diane: It's okay.
    David: I'm sorry, I'm ranting, I am just, like... I don't know. Um... [he chokes up] Ooh. Sorry, I'm just, like, so fucking exhausted by him sometimes, you know? Like, I... I, I love him and I hate him and I wanna kill him... and I wanna be him, you know? And I feel, like, so stupid around him, you know, because he is so fucking cool and he just does not give a shit. And then... just, like, being here with him is just so fucking baffling to me, you know? It's just baffling, 'cause it's like: How did this guy come from the survivors of this place, you know? [he turns to Mark] I mean, that your uncle had to sell, like, used furniture to rich assholes or, like, couldn't get into medical school. [he turns to Eloge] And that you survived, like, the worst thing to happen on this planet in the last thirty years. And that our grandma survived by a thousand miracles when the entire world was trying to kill her, you know? And I look at him and I just, like, wanna ask him... I just wanna ask him, and I just can't. Like... like, how did the product of a thousand fucking miracles overdose on a bottle of sleeping pills?
    Marcia: What?
    Diane: Sorry, what did you say?
    David: Yeah, he tried to... yeah, sorry, I probably shouldn't have said anything.
    James: It's okay. Uh, I'm so - I'm sorry to hear that.
    Eloge: I'm so sorry. That's - that's very distressing.
    Marcia: When did this happen?
    David: Like six - six months ago. My aunt Leah - uh, Benji's mom - found him on the couch. And I know he is so funny and so charming. And you are all gonna walk away with this picture of this amazing man, which he totally is in so many ways. But when I picture him, it is passed out on a ratty basement couch while I am in New York City with my beautiful wife and adorable child, and it just fucking kills me. Sorry. I'm... I'm oversharing. [the sound of live piano emerges from the next room] Well, they're back again.
    Marcia: It's him.
    [the pianist is revealed to be Benji, playing Tea for Two]
    Marcia: If I hear from my kids once a month, it's a shock.
    Benji: Oh, Marcia. Fuck those guys. Man, I wouldn't miss a week.
    Benji: You are, like, an awesome guy stuck inside the body of somebody who's always running late. And I gotta, like, fish that fuckin' guy outta ya every time I see ya.
    David: Thank you, I think.

## Cast

* Jesse Eisenberg - David Kaplan
* Kieran Culkin - Benjamin "Benji" Kaplan
* Will Sharpe - James
* Jennifer Grey - Marcia
* Kurt Egyiawan - Eloge
* Liza Sadovy - Diane
* Daniel Oreskes - Mark
* Ellora Torchia - Priya

## External links

* A Real Pain quotes at the Internet Movie Database