# Ian Holloway

Ian Holloway (born 12 March 1963) is an English football manager.

## Quotes

* We're like a bad tea-bag - we never stay in the Cup that long - reacting to his QPR side's defeat in the League Cup (then known as the Carling Cup for sponsorship reasons) to Aston Villa in September 2004.
** "Quotes of the week". BBC Sport. 28 September 2004. Retrieved on 11 March 2019.
* To put it in gentleman's terms if you've been out for a night and you're looking for a young lady and you pull one, some weeks they're good looking and some weeks they're not the best. Our performance today would have been not the best looking bird but at least we got her in the taxi. She wasn't the best looking lady we ended up taking home but she was very pleasant and very nice, so thanks very much, let's have a coffee - on the "ugly" win against Chesterfield.
** Gordon Strachan v Ian Holloway: Sportsmail picks their top 10 funny quotes ahead of Middlesbrough's showdown with Blackpool. Mail Online (2009-12-08). Retrieved on 2011-04-29.
* Apparently it's my fault that the Titanic sank.
** On criticism from Plymouth Argyle fans during Leicester City's match against Plymouth Argyle. Holloway Column, BBC Sport: Football (website), retrieved 15 February 2008, page now lapsed.
** Gordon Strachan v Ian Holloway: Sportsmail picks their top 10 funny quotes ahead of Middlesbrough's showdown with Blackpool. Mail Online (2009-12-08). Retrieved on 2011-04-29.
* I love Blackpool. We're very similar. We both look better in the dark.
** Reported on The Football League Show, BBC 1, 26 September 2009.
** Gordon Strachan v Ian Holloway: Sportsmail picks their top 10 funny quotes ahead of Middlesbrough's showdown with Blackpool. Mail Online (2009-12-08). Retrieved on 2011-04-29.
* If you're a burglar, it's no good poncing about outside somebody's house, looking good with your swag bag ready. Just get in there, burgle them and come out. I don't advocate that obviously, it's just an analogy.
** Charles, Chris (2009-10-14). Sport quotes of the week. BBC Spot. Retrieved on 2009-10-14.
* Why haven't they got cameras? The officials can speak to each other easily enough now. Why aren't we using laptops that are linked up and can give a decision in five seconds? A chimpanzee could do it - with not much training. We might as well go back to being cavemen, grab our girl by the hair, drag her into the cave whether she wants to come in or not because we may as well live in that age. We've come forward, haven't we?
** Charles, Chris (2009-10-14). Sport Quotes of the Week. BBC Sport. Retrieved on 2009-10-14.
* In the first-half we were like the Dog and Duck, in the second-half we were like Real Madrid. We can't go on like that. At full-time I was at them like an irritated Jack Russell.
** Daly, James (2010-12-30). Happy Holloways - the crazy quotes which defined football in 2010. Goal.com. Retrieved on 2011-04-29.
* I'd rather do that than build chicken sheds no-one wanted!
** On Blackpool making the Championship play-off final in 2010 having spent a year out of football making hen houses.
** Charles, Chris (2010-05-12). Sport Quotes of the Week. BBC Sport. Retrieved on 2010-05-22.
* Reporter: Ian, have you got any injury worries? Holloway: No, I'm fully fit, thank you.
** Daly, James (2010-12-30). Happy Holloways - the crazy quotes which defined football in 2010. Goal.com. Retrieved on 2011-04-29.
* In football you need to have everything in your cake mix to make the cake taste right. One little bit of ingredient that Tony uses in his cake gets talked about all the time is Rory’s throw. Call that cinnamon and he’s got a cinnamon flavoured cake. It’s not fair and it’s not right and it’s only a small part of what he does.
** On Tony Pulis's style of management. Mirror Football, 10 December 2010
** Butler, Jeremy (2010-12-10). Holloway uses bizarre cake analogy for Pulis' Stoke style. Mirror Football. Retrieved on 2010-12-11.
* The kid makes you sick. He looks the part, he walks the part, he is the part. He's six-foot something, fit as a flea, good-looking - he's got to have something wrong with him....Hopefully he's hung like a hamster! That would make us all feel better!
** On Cristiano Ronaldo
** "Holloway column" , BBC SPORTS(4 april 2008)