# Almost Heroes (TV series)

Almost Heroes (2011) is a Canadian TV series currently airing on Showcase about two brothers running a comic book store.

## Season 1
### Terry and Peter vs. a Living Wage [1.4]

    Terry:[Reading the label on a bottle of medication he is putting in Pete's cupcakes] Side effects include...sleep heroics.

### Terry and Peter vs. Their Hero [1.5]

    [Peter has just mentioned that the actor who played his childhood hero Colonel Cannon is coming to town for a commercial]
    Terry: Still don't care.
    Peter: You willlll! Remember how his arch-nemesis was the [Peter makes quotation marks with his hands]] "Rat-King"?
    Terry: Oh, no no no. We're not giving away rats.
    Peter: I already bought 'em!
    Terry: You what!?
    Peter: Don't worry, all 200 of them are safe and sound inside this [Taps on empty cage] cage. Hmm... They're all gone.
    Terry: Course they are.
    Peter: Must've left the lid off. Probably for the best.
    Terry: Go on.
    Peter: Well, all the rats that were left over I was going to feed to our new pet snake.
    Terry: What snake?
    Peter: That twelve-foot boa constrictor in that cage over there. [Camera pans to another, larger empty cage] Oh, it's gone too.
    Terry: Just out of curiousity, what was in that [points to even larger empty cage with bent bars] cage?
    Peter: You don't want to know [Grabs a battle axe].
    Peter: It's a comic book shop. Everything about it is supposed to be fun. I used to brush my teeth with Tang.
    Terry: Why would you brush your teeth with Tang?
    Peter: [Matter of factly] Because I wanted the smile of an astronaut. Uch... Ever since you came back it's been all 'money, money, bitches and honey'.
    Terry: OK, that is a terrific impression of me. But it's not true.
    Peter: Oh yeah? You're all about the bottom line! You're Mr. "Buy High, Sell Low".
    Terry: You see? That is exactly why you're not allowed near the money.
    Peter: Then I'll just get away from you and your precious "The Money". [Jumps off counter] Ahh, dammit, why'd I put all the rat-traps back here?

### Terry and Peter vs. the Law [1.6]

    Rayna: Two break-ins in one week, Boyd? Tonight I need you to stake-out the mall.
    Boyd: Stake out? Tonight's no good. I've already made plans. Staying up all night in my van, eating junk food, monitoring the comings and goings of the mall...
    Rayna: That's what a stake-out is.
    Boyd: Well... Things just got interesting.

### Terry and Peter vs. the Season Finale [1.8]

    Peter: Please Terry, I'm not completely useless. Remember, I built my own scissor hands? [Cuts to flashback] ...Oh, my fly's open. Now to do it up, which I'm sure will be a total success, and completely uneventful.
    Terry: What a horrible example.
    Rayna: [Starts to drink cappucino, and then pulls out drenched sock] Is this a sock?
    Peter: No refunds.
    Rayna: I haven't paid yet.
    Peter: That'll be four dollars.
    Boyd: I'm really going to miss you Peter.
    Terry: Terry.
    Boyd: Right! Oh, and if in your travels you come across a one-legged man who answers to the name of Vargus, tell him I want my life back.

## Cast

* Paul Campbell - Terry
* Ryan Belleville - Pete
* Dave Hemstad - Dan
* Lauren Ash - Bernie
* Meghan Heffern - Candi
* Athena Karkanis - Rayna
* Colin Mochrie - Boyd

## External links

* Almost Heroes quotes at the Internet Movie Database
* Official site