# Happy Gilmore

Happy Gilmore is a 1996 film about a rejected hockey player who puts his skills to the golf course to save his grandmother's house.
    Directed by Dennis Dugan. Written by Tim Herlihy and Adam Sandler

## Dialogue

    Mover: You hit that guy!
    Happy: He shouldn't have been standing there.
    Chubbs: Golf's no different from hockey. It requires talent and self discipline.
    Happy: Golf requires goofy pants and a fat ass. You should talk to my neighbor the accountant, probably a great golfer, huge ass.
    Chubbs: Hey, I'll bet your neighbor the accountant can't drive the ball 400 yards. I'll bet your neighbor the accountant doesn't have a shot to get on the Pro Tour!
    Happy: And how would I do that?
    Chubbs: You win the Open tomorrow, and you're automatically on the Pro Tour. Then who knows, maybe you'll win the Tour Championship. Get that gold jacket that I never got.
    Happy: Gold jacket, green jacket, who gives a shit?
    McGavin: I eat pieces of shit like you for breakfast.
    Happy: You eat pieces of shit for breakfast?
    McGavin: No.
    [McGavin takes a shot]
    Mr. Larson: Trying to reach the green from here, Shooter?
    McGavin: That's not possible, sir.
    Mr. Larson: I beg to differ, Happy Gilmore accomplished that feat no more than an hour ago.
    McGavin: [turning round and seeing Mr. Larson] Well, moron, good for Happy Gilm- [recoils] OH MY GOD!!!
    Happy: I'll make you a bet. If you get this puck into that net, I'll never bother you again. But if you miss, you have to give me a big fat kiss. And you have to pretend you like it too.
    Virginia: Do you always carry a puck with you?
    Happy: Yeah. [Virginia shoots the puck and scores] Holy shit. Talk about your all time backfires.
    Virginia: Happy, I didn't see it go in.
    [The two lovers kiss]
    Announcer: We haven't seen Happy Gilmore play this badly since his first day on tour. He and Bob Barker are now dead last.
    Barker: I can't believe you're a professional golfer. I think you should be working at the snack bar.
    Happy: You better relax, Bob.
    Barker: There is no way that you could have been as bad at hockey as you are at golf.
    Happy: All right. Let's go! [punches Barker in the face] You like that, old man?! You want a piece of me?!
    Barker: [shakes his head as he gets up from the ground] I don't want a piece of you. I want the whole THING! [repeatedly punches Happy vigorously until he hits the water]
    Happy: [angrily emerges from the water] Now you're gonna get it, Bobby! [he and Barker continue fighting, and they roll down the hill, until he conks Barker in the head and gets back on his feet]
    Man from behind: [cheers Happy on] Happy!
    Happy: The Price is wrong, bitch!
    [Barker suddenly chokes Happy and punches him 3 times]
    Barker: I think you've had enough. [Happy tries to get back up again] No? [kicks Happy in the face once more] Now you've had enough. [sets off, then turns back to Happy] Bitch.
    [After Happy's ball went through the tower and into the hole]
    Happy: Oh, my God!
    [The crowd cheers and surrounds Happy]
    Verne Lundquist: This is incredible! Happy Gilmore wins the gold jacket.
    Shooter: No! NOOOOO! [bends down in defeat and agony]
    Happy: I love you, [kisses his grandmother] you [kisses Virginia] and you. [kisses Otto]
    Shooter: Doug! Doug! Impossible! That's mine! My jacket! It's mine! [steals Happy's gold jacket from Doug, and runs away]
    Happy: Hey! He stole my jacket!
    Mr. Larson: [to himself; in anger] I believe that is Mr. Gilmore's. [in slow-motion, Shooter runs as he puts on Happy's jacket. The crowd chases him. He angrily growls as he swings his arms] I'll get you, Shooter!
    Man: We're gonna get you, you bastard!
    Shooter: [screams, then collapses offscreen as the crowd attacks him] No! Get off! Ow! Get off! Get off!
    Mr. Larson: Stay still!
    [A punch is heard]
    Shooter: NOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!
    [A loud smack is heard as Shooter screams in pain]

## Taglines

* He doesn't play golf... he destroys it.

## Cast

* Adam Sandler — Happy Gilmore
* Christopher McDonald — Shooter McGavin
* Julie Bowen — Virginia Venit
* Frances Bay — Grandma
* Carl Weathers — Derick "Chubbs" Peterson
* Allen Covert — Otto
* Bob Barker — Himself
* Richard Kiel — Mr. Larson
* Joe Flaherty — Donald
* Lee Trevino — Himself
* Dennis Dugan — Doug
* Verne Lundquist — Himself
* Ben Stiller (uncredited) — Hal L.

## External links

* Happy Gilmore quotes at the Internet Movie Database
* Happy Gilmore at Rotten Tomatoes