# Going Bongo

Going Bongo is a 2015 comedy drama film directed by Dean Matthew Ronalds and produced by Brian Ronalds. Going Bongo star Ernest Napoleon and features Emanuela Galliussi, Nyokabi Gethaiga and Ashley Olds.

## Quotes

1. You touch her, I cut off your balls!
MARINA: He also asked me to marry him. MA: But he is not Armenian. AUNT TIA: What is he? LEWIS: American AUNT TIA: But he has a funny accent. LEWIS: Well, I was raised by- POP: You think you can marry my daughter and no asking?
MARINA: Ask
LEWIS: Now?
LEWIS: Mr. Kezerian, may I--
POP: You touch her, I cut off your balls!
2. I’m already half black, half white. I got no more halves.
LEWIS: Do we have to honeymoon in Armenia?
MARINA: I know, I know. you want your beach.
LEWIS: I’ve been trapped in hospitals for the last ten years with almost no days off and no sunlight.
MARINA: There’s a lake.
LEWIS: Its not the same thing.
MARINA: Look, I need you to meet me half way.
LEWIS: By "half way" you mean Armenia?
MARINA: We’ll do the beach vacation later. I need you to be half "Armo" for them.
LEWIS: I’m already half black, half white. I got no more halves.
3. It is what locals call Dar. It means you must have good brains and intelligence or you will not survive.
TENDE: And Dr. Yaziti is lending for you this baiskeli. I leave it for you outside. The hospitali is five minutes in this direction. Welcome to Bongo City. LEWIS: Bongo City?
TENDE: It is what locals call Dar. It means you must have good brains and intelligence or you will not survive.
4. Dark skinned men look good in white.
MARINA: Next time you rent a suit, I’m going with you.
LEWIS: Dark skinned men look good in white. MARINA: Apparently waiters also look good in white.
5. Dr.Booger
BAHAME: Dr.Booger
LEWIS: Burger
BAHAME: That’s what I said.
LEWIS: You said Booger. It’s "Burrrrger". Like "Hamburger".
BAHAME: Ham-booger.
LEWIS: Dr. B’s fine.
BAHAME So when are you leaving us?
LEWIS: One month.
BAHAME: You are here for only one month?
6. It requires a lot of carefulness to kill the fly that perches on the scrotum.
LEWIS: How much does Rama make?
BAHAME: This is not your concern.
LEWIS: If you paid him more, that generator would be fixed.
BAHAME: Do not tell me how to do my job.
LEWIS: Hear me out. A staff that feels valued, works harder. They work harder, you SAVE money.
BAHAME: Listen, "It requires a lot of carefulness to kill the fly that perches on the scrotum."
7. You can’t solve them all. But you can change one problem at a time
LAURA: How is everything else going?
LEWIS: It’s going good.
LEWIS: Well, I have this patient named Zola. Its hard enough that she’s got HIV ... and her mom is just very difficult
LAURA: I heard. I am think deep inside she’s just concerned about her daughter
LEWIS: Yah but ... for such a young girl to contract HIV, its just ... And her mom is just ... And I saw the boy in the wheelchair again today....
LAURA: I went through the exactly same experience when I was new here.
LEWIS: There are just too many problems. It feels that I can’t even begin to dream that I can solve half of them.
LAURA: You can’t solve them all. But you can change one problem at a time.
8. All I can think about is Africa.
LEWIS: Marina, there’s something--
MARINA: Here. Sit next to Brian. She plops Lewis next to Brian, then sits by Gwen. BRIAN: Gwen and I are gonna bid on lot four, what do you think?
PERRY WEISS: Thank you, thank you. Hello friends. I’m Perry Weiss and welcome to our quarterly fundraiser.
AUCTIONEER (O.S.) : Our programs are ninety nine percent privately funded which means your support is vital.
MARINA: Lewis? What are you doing over here? LEWIS: I don’t want this. This job. These people.
MARINA: What are you talking about? LEWIS: All I can think about is Africa.
9. I’ve been trapped in hospitals for the last ten years with almost no days off and no sunlight.
LEWIS: I think that went well. Your father only threatened to cut my balls off once.
MARINA: I can’t wait to move outta there.
LEWIS: Do we have to honeymoon in Armenia?
MARINA: I know, I know. you want your beach.
LEWIS: I’ve been trapped in hospitals for the last ten years with almost no days off and no sunlight.
10. Before you swallow a mango seed, you must know the size of your anus
LEWIS: I understand you’re overcrowded, you don’t have supplies. But really that doesn’t explain your staff. Who trained them, the three stooges?
BAHAME: Do you think there are lines of nurses and doctors waiting to work here?
LEWIS: You need retrain your staff.
BAHAME: With what money? I can barely keep my doors open. People wait days here to get a bed. They need help and we must give it to them anyway we can.
LEWIS: Fine. I’ll do it. BAHAME: For one month? If you want to stay the situation then stay longer.
LEWIS: I can’t do that.
BAHAME: Then, there is nothing more.
LEWIS: So, what? That’s it!
BAHAME: Listen."Before you swallow a mango seed, you must know the size of your anus." Think about it.
11. You mean, I’ve been haggling the price HIGHER?!
WALLET VENDOR: Elfu tano na tano (15 thousands)
LEWIS: Ghali! (more expensive)
WALLET VENDOR: Ishirini (20)
LEWIS: Ghali! (more expensive)
WALLET VENDOR: Ishirini na tano (25)
LEWIS: Ghali! (more expensive)
WALLET VENDOR: Thelathini (30)
LEWIS: Tende! LEWIS: Tende, look how well I’m doing TENDE: No no no! Ghali means "expensive". Rahisi means "cheap". LEWIS: You mean, I’ve been haggling the price HIGHER?!
12. I was born to do this
LEWIS: Don’t you think that’s crazy.
LAURA: It is LEWIS: What would you do? LAURA: About what? mgangas? What can you do. You just accept that others may not share your view on modern medicine.
LEWIS: ... What if the "mganga" was to prescribe them modern medicine.
LAURA: They would take them. But of course, that would never happen not.
LEWIS: So if I can get a mganga ... LAURA: You are crazy. You are not really thinking of doing this ... you are thinking of doing this ... how are you going to convince a "professional mganga" to give her real medicine.
LEWIS: I wasn’t thinking of a real mganga. … LEWIS: This is our last chance to save Zola. You know what to do.
LEWIS :Are you sure you can do this? (to Tina)
TINA: I was born to do this. My mask please.
13. The only reason I came over here was to impress some big-wig surgeons.
LAURA: Listen, there’s a bus leaving for Arusha in the morning. Go on a safari. You need to see the beauty of this country.
LEWIS: What’s that gonna do?
LAURA: Take some time for yourself.
LEWIS :You have no idea what I need. The only reason I came over here was to impress some big-wig surgeons.
LAURA: I don’t believe this.
LEWIS: It’s true.
14. Not as great as landing one Owen Wilson
DR. LERNER: My niece is trying to convince me she needs the new Ferrari more than I do.
MARVIN: She sounds like my daughter.
LEWIS: Dr. Lerner. I wanted to thank you. It was such an incredible experience.
DR. LERNER: Do I know you?
LEWIS: I’m Dr. Burger. We met at the Perry Weiss fundraiser. I went to Tanzania.
DR. LERNER: Perry Weiss. Can you believe my wife has roped us into another one of those things?
MARVIN: It’s great publicity for the clinic.
DR. LERNER: Not as great as landing one Owen Wilson.
15. Are you an actress? I am an actress too. I have a movie on YouTube.
MARINA: I need a phone. Do you have a phone? Excuse me, phone? Phone?
LEWIS: Marina???
MARINA: Lewis? Lewis! Oh my God! This is YOUR hospital? Oh Baby, its so good to see you
LEWIS: What are you doing here?!
MARINA: A bus "thing" hit my cab.
TINA: Please, Misses. Lie on this.
TINA: Are you an actress? I am an actress too. I have a movie on YouTube.
16. Yah, its amazing what persistence can do sometimes. You can even save someone’s life.
LAURA: Thank you.
LEWIS: That was incredible experience. I have never done anything like that.
LAURA: Did you see how much it meant to the mother. LEWIS: It was pretty amazing. LAURA: Yah, its amazing what persistence can do sometimes. You can even save someone’s life.
17. Nice, you beat 26 doctors in the face
MARINA: Listen up. I have an announcement.
MARINA: Lewis got a job offer. Doctors of Bel Air have asked him to join the clinic.
MA: Bel Air? LEWIS: Well technically, Ma’am, it’s L.A. MARINA: He beat out thirty other doctors.
LEWIS: Twenty six.
UNCLE HOVAN: Nice, you beat 26 doctors in the Face.
18. You can make us a fool but you can’t take our humanity
TINA: Hellow, I am Njambi mambi’s assistant.
TINA: Now ... Njambi Mambi will break the curse by breaking the sticks.
TINA: Njambi Mambi was afraid of this. A stronger curse is needed.
TINA: Pull, till it breaks.
TINA: Njambi Mambi has broken the curse!
ZOLA: And, now for the treatment. The crushed bones of baby baboon.
ZOLA: Take two spoonfuls a day.
LEWIS: Let’s dance.
MAMA MWANDENGA: What is going on!
MAMA MWANDENGA: I’m telling you this, I am cursing you all. I am cursing you all!
ZOLA: You can make us a fool but you can’t take our humanity
19. I thought if they were appreciated, they’d work harder.
LEWIS: Juma, what’s going on? Where is everyone?
YAZITI: At the bar celebrating their new salaries.
LEWIS: What?! What bar? Where?
YAZITI: It will do no good to get them. They are already drunk.
LEWIS: They should be fired!
YAZITI :But you just gave them raises.
LEWIS: I thought if they were appreciated, they’d work harder.
20. Don’t fly Turkish Airways. Go with Camel
MA: When are you planning this "supposed" wedding?
MARINA: Spring.
LEWIS: Spring?
MARINA: Spring.
UNCLE HOVAN: Oh! Spring! Great time for honeymoon in Armenia.
LEWIS: Actually, we were thinking of going some place tropical-
MARINA: Armenia’s perfect.
UNCLE HOVAN: Don’t fly Turkish Airways. Go with Camel.