# Mermaids (1990 film)

Mermaids is a 1990 American comedy-drama film, set in 1963, about a carefree single mother who uproots her family every time her love life goes awry. When she and her daughters relocate to a small town in Massachusetts, the family encounters a series of events that test and strengthen their bonds with one another.
    Written by June Roberts. Directed by Richard Benjamin, based on Patty Dann's book of the same name.

## Charlotte Flax

* A word about Mrs. Flax and food: the word is "hors d'oeurves". "Fun Finger Foods" is her main source book and that's all the woman cooks. Anything more, she says, is too big a commitment.
* [narrating] Please, God, let him throw me on the ground and make another Joey Junior.
* I may be pregnant with the next Jewish-Italian Messiah!
* [everyone in town is stricken by the news of President Kennedy's assassination] It feels like there isn't a single adult left on the entire planet.
* So Joe, tell me about the nuns in the convent. Do they wear underwear in the shower? [narrating] I don't believe I said that.
* Oh, I'm going to hell for sure. Here he is, talking about his poor dead mother and I can't help wishing his hands were unbuttoning my dress!

## Rachel Flax

* OK, I've had a little scotch...I'm real calm.
* Death is dwelling on the past or staying in one place too long!
* [Charlotte is praying at a shrine she has made in her room to the Virgin Mary] Charlotte, we're Jewish.
* [to Charlotte as she goes out to spend time with Joe] Don't do anything I wouldn't do…[pause] Or don't do anything I would!
* [Charlotte has a newfound obsession with Greek mythology] Charlotte, we're Jewish.

## Kate Flax

* [to her sister] Act your age, not your shoe size.
* [wanting a glass of wine] Hit me, Sergeant!

## Dialogue

    Lou Landsky: If you care about us, would it kill you to show it?
    Rachel: "Us"? When did YOU and *my* children become "us"? You're just YOU, Lou - me and the girls, THAT'S "us”!
    Lou Landsky: I was talking about you and me.
    Rachel: Charlotte, you drive like old people make love.
    Charlotte: Mom, I'm only 15. I get nervous.
    Rachel: Driving happens to be one of the two most important skills a woman could have. You should be tickled pink that I taught you early.
    Charlotte: [narrating] Oh, God, please let Mrs. Flax control herself.
    Lou Landsky: You're still a perfect seven, Reverend Mother. You know, most women's feet get bigger.
    Rachel: Only if they marry.
    Charlotte: [narrating] Oh, no!
    Rachel: You know, your feet swell. When you get pregnant, your feet swell.
    [Charlotte is mortified]
    Charlotte: [narrating] How could she? How could she?
    Rachel: I know mine got swollen when I was pregnant.
    Charlotte: [whispering] Mother, how could you say that? She's a holy vessel!
    Rachel: [wearing a mermaid costume for the New Year's Eve party] All right, I can tell by my mermaid watch that it's time for me to get in my mermaid car and hit the mermaid road!
    Kate: And get the mermaid outta here!
    Mother Superior: Yes, dear?
    [Charlotte stands in front of her, smiling awkwardly]
    Charlotte: [narrating] I desperately wanted to ask her what color her bra was and if she had pure thoughts every second of the day, but…
    [Charlotte is unable to speak]
    Kate: When I die, I want to be sprinkled in the ocean. I don't care if a whale eats me. I could live inside a whale like Jonah with an angel guard.
    Rachel: Girls…
    Charlotte: Yeah, well, what if you get a whale that doesn't have a living room inside him and you end up in someone's tuna fish sandwich?
    Rachel: You know, Charlotte, I think you might be old enough for a boyfriend now.
    Charlotte: If I'm old enough, maybe you're too old.
    Rachel: Don't be ridiculous. A real woman is never too old.
    Charlotte: What are you doing?
    Kate: Sucking out the pimentos. They give me hernias.
    Charlotte: You mean hives, fish-head.
    Charlotte: [wearing heavy makeup] OK, how do I look?
    Kate: Like someone drew all over you.
    Dr. Reynolds: [after examining Charlotte, who thinks she is pregnant after kissing Joe] Has your mother ever talked to you about sex?
    Charlotte: [narrating] Please, God, I want to die.
    [to the doctor]
    Charlotte: Yeah, all the time.
    Dr. Reynolds: So you do know how babies are conceived?
    Charlotte: Oh, yeah. We talk about everything. She's a wonderful mother.
    Dr. Reynolds: Then why did you think you were pregnant? You're still a virgin.
    Charlotte: [narrating] I want to die now. Right now.
    [Charlotte is going fishing with Joe]
    Joe: Do you want to bait your own hook or do you want me to do it?
    Charlotte: [narrating] Mary, mother of God... he still wants to fish?
    Charlotte: I want to stay!
    Rachel: And do what?
    Charlotte: Finish high school!
    Rachel: Great start! What's your major, town tramp?
    Charlotte: No, Mom, the town already has one.
    [Rachel slaps her]

## Taglines

* Mom Is Many Things...Normal Isn't One of Them.

## Cast

* Cher - Rachel Flax
* Winona Ryder - Charlotte Flax
* Christina Ricci - Kate Flax
* Bob Hoskins - Lou Landsky
* Michael Schoeffling - Joe Peretti
* Rex Trailer - Dr. Reynolds
* Jan Miner - Mother Superior

## External links

Mermaids quotes at the Internet Movie Database