# Mystery Team

Mystery Team is a 2009 comedy film about a group of former Encyclopedia Brown-style child-detectives who struggle to solve an adult mystery.
    Directed by Dan Eckman. Written by Donald Glover, DC Pierson, Dominic Dierkes, and Dan Eckman.

## Charlie

* Oh okay, so we're definitely not just taking off clothes then, gotcha'.

## Duncan

* The door's locked! McGinty, you clever dog!
* If any teachers ask where Eric went, tell them that three grown-ups took him off the playground to teach him a lesson about sticking his finger in things.
* Sorry I'm late, everybody. My science teacher says my thesis needs to prove something... but I think listing all the dinosaurs proves there was a lot of dinosaurs.
* Looks like we've got a long night of cocaine ahead of us.
* We're keeping evidence from the police, okay? We could go to jail! You know what happens in jail? No T.V.!
* Goodnight sweet hobo. May your bindle be heavy with treasures, but your heart be light with song.

## Jason

* Decorative pillows? What is this, the White House?
* Paper plates? Are you expecting the pope?

## Jim

* Frank! Sometimes I wish you didn't beat that cancer. I really do.

## Jamie

* There's something fishy going on down at the sardine factory! I think it's fish!

## Jordy

* When I was fifteen years old, when I got this job, I said to myself, "I am going to work here until the day that I kill myself."
* Hey! Are you squeezing that bread? We had a deal! We had a deal you fucking animal! What the f...ah dude, did you fuck this bread? You fucked the shit out of this bread. You don't fuck bread. Every fucking thing!
* You remind me a little of me. You know what I'm going to call you from now on, "Little Me". I just came up with that right now.
* Paying you in advance, buddy!

## Dialogue

    Jason: She's really something, it's just... I'm no good with girls.
    Frank: Oh, you're whipped! [imitates whipping]
    Jim: [interrupting] Frank! Sometimes I wish you didn't beat that cancer. I really do.
    Kelly: [holding the ring] Where did you find this?
    Jason: It's a long story.
    Charlie: No, it's not. A stripper peed it into a toilet.
    Jason: Ah! Cinnamon sticks!
    Charlie: Ah! Chinese checkers!
    Duncan: Fuck! Yeah, that's right. I've been saying "fuck". Going in the backyard and trying it out.
    Duncan: Honestly, this is breaking and entering, okay? It's illegal.
    Jason: But, it's for justice, so it's legal again.
    Duncan: Our most consistent customer has Alzheimer's!
    Jason: Mrs. Kimmel does not have Alzheimer's!
    Duncan: She bakes fifty pies a day for her dead husband. Most of the pies are filled with soap.
    Jason: We are mature and legitimate detectives.
    Kelly: What the hell is that smell?
    Duncan: I drank dog urine.

## Cast

* Donald Glover - Jason Rogers
* DC Pierson - Duncan Wheeler
* Dominic Dierkes - Charlie Day
* Aubrey Plaza - Kelly Peters
* Glenn Kalison - Robert Finney
* Peter Saati - Leroy Maddox
* Ellie Kemper - Jamie
* Matt Walsh - Jim
* Bobby Moynihan - Jordy
* Daphne Ciccarelle - Brianna Peters
* John Lutz - Frank
* Jon Daly - Greg Coleman
* Neil Casey - Broken Man

## External links

* Mystery Team quotes at the Internet Movie Database
* Mystery Team at Rotten Tomatoes