# Passage to Nirvana

Passage to Nirvana, A Survivor's Zen Voyage: Reflections on Loss, Discovery, Healing & Hope is a memoir by Lee Carlson written over a period from 2005 to 2010, while he and his fiancée Meg were passengers on board a 60-foot sailboat named Nirvana. This was Carlson's first book, although he had a long career as a writer, working as a journalist, magazine editor, freelance writer, and later in advertising and marketing copywriting. The memoir focuses on Carlson's recovery from a traumatic brain injury and the death of his mother from a similar injury. It also explores themes such as Zen Buddhism, sailing, divorce, children, family, and poetry. The book ultimately addresses finding peace and happiness after traumatic life events and discovering the joy in living.

## Plot summary

Passage to Nirvana begins with Lee Carlson's accident when he is hit by a car outside a car wash. He sustains a traumatic brain injury, including a fractured skull and bleeding inside the brain, resulting in a light coma. The narrative follows his brief hospitalization, a year-long rehabilitation in Florida, and his return to the North Fork of Long Island, where he attempts to rebuild his life. During this period, Carlson faces multiple challenges: his wife has left him with their children, his business has collapsed, and he is without a home.
   "I'm a believer in storytelling, I think the human mind has always learned from storytelling — from Grendel to Aesop's Fables to the Arabian Nights. Storytelling helps us organize our world.
While in Florida, Carlson helps care for his severely disabled mother, who suffered a traumatic brain injury from a fall. She is unable to walk, talk, or feed herself and eventually dies. Upon returning to Long Island, Carlson faces further difficulties, including the deaths of his aunt and brother-in-law, prompting him to support his sister and her children in Buffalo.
Despite the hardships, the book emphasizes healing and positive affirmation. Carlson focuses on Zen Buddhist studies and meditation, working with the writer and Zen teacher Peter Matthiessen at the Ocean Zendo. The memoir explores the spiritual aspects of healing, acceptance, and rebuilding a life. Carlson eventually meets a woman who has faced her own challenges, including a difficult divorce and raising two children alone. They fall in love, purchase and renovate a sailboat named "Nirvana," and work on creating a new family life with their children and pets. They sail to the Bahamas for a winter writing sabbatical, where most of the book was written.
The book is a collection of short essays, combining real-time events, reflections on traumatic brain injury, philosophical musings, and childhood memories.

## Writing style

Passage to Nirvana is structured as a series of short, interconnected essays and stories, often just a few pages long. These segments draw on Carlson's life and recovery, presenting them as moral fables. Many chapters are introduced with very brief poems, sometimes only three or four words long, which Carlson refers to as a "Po." The book's narrative is non-linear. In the introduction, Carlson explains that this style emerged from his cognitive processes during recovery. The short poems were necessary because he initially struggled with longer sentences, the brief chapters reflected his difficulty with longer texts, and the non-linear narrative mirrored his challenges with sustained concentration. Consequently, the narrative frequently shifts in time, creating an inventive and engaging read. Each chapter stands alone as an essay, allowing readers to start reading from any chapter as if it were a short story.

## Background and publication

Written between 2005 and 2010, Passage to Nirvana was published in 2010. The book was initially rejected by several mainstream publishers and agents due to its unconventional writing style and layout. Leveraging his experience in magazine publishing, Carlson established his own publishing company, Henry Chapin and Sons, to publish and market the book. Embracing new technology and the evolving publishing industry, he used crowdfunding to finance the project, raising nearly $13,000 from individual donors through Kickstarter. Carlson also utilized Facebook and the global network of Amazon sites to market the book and reach a worldwide audience. The book garnered a following in the U.S. and internationally, including readers from Canada, Mexico, Peru, Brazil, Argentina, Chile, the U.K., Ireland, France, Italy, Russia, Poland, Morocco, South Africa, Croatia, India, Nepal, Indonesia, Japan, Australia, and other countries.

## Reviews and criticism

Passage to Nirvana has received positive reviews. One reviewer noted, "Mr. Carlson is playful with words, which is part of the enchantment of his po-etics, or short poems, called po. With titles like Passage to Nirvana and The Book of Po, they made me think of Passage to India and Life of Pi. The references lead by imagination to the land of origin for Buddhism, or so I take it. Mr. Carlson's journey is graced with whimsy, like a good south wind with the sail in a reach and spray in your face... The writing here is lucid, with a light touch—light of heart."
Another reviewer stated, "No one is perfect, and realizing this is the first step in finding that second opportunity in life. Passage to Nirvana: A Survivor's Zen Voyage: Reflections on Loss, Discovery, Healing & Hope is an inspirational and spiritual read from Lee Carlson. Recovering from a traumatic brain injury, he found new joy in life and found his own passage to joy in life through many arts of Zen. Thoughtful and riveting reading, Passage to Nirvana is an enlightening and educational read that shouldn't be overlooked for those looking for their own second chances."
A third review described Passage to Nirvana as "An inspirational story of how love and the strength of the human spirit can triumph over adversity, Passage to Nirvana is a reminder to cherish every day and never forget that our health is, indeed, our wealth."