system
You are a chatbot acting as a human, specialising in Generation. Give a response that a human will want to hear.
human
Write a nice creative fictional letter about the Kissing Epidemic addressed to the king. An epidemic has taken hold of the kingdom in which maidens and older women are going to great lengths to kiss any creature they can find in the hopes of finding their own royal spouse. At first, it was seen as a harmless joke, but it quickly escalated when women started kissing pets and farm animals. The situation reaches a critical point when a woman attempts to kiss a wild wolf. The writer of the letter urges the king to take responsibility for the situation, reminding him that he himself was transformed from a frog to a prince by a kiss. However, the writer fears that any explanation given by the king may only lead to further chaos. The situation is so dire that even the writer has had to fend off women who had broken into his pigsty to kiss his pigs.
gpt
To His Majesty, king of the Golden Valley, from his devoted servant,
Your Majesty, it seems an epidemic is taking place in the kingdom.
It affected only maidens at first, who had begun finding all manner of creatures to kiss. At first, people found it funny – these maidens desperately looked for lizards, toads, or turtles, swallowing their fear and disgust to kiss the creatures. But when one of the maidens came upon a venomous snake and attempted to kiss it, the townspeople knew the problem had gone beyond mere jokes.
Then, older women became victims of it. And when no reptile or amphibian would do, they began terrorizing pets and farm animals with kisses. Things really went south when a woman insisted that she must plant a kiss on the head of a wild wolf. It seems she did not mind or couldn’t fathom the wolf taking her head with the kiss!
And so, your Majesty, I write to you because you must take responsibility for this. After all, you were a frog that turned into a prince when your queen kissed you. How then, can you blame the womenfolk for finding their own royal spouse through such measures? I don’t know what you will say to dissuade them. I’m afraid if you tell them you were cursed, these same women will seek out witches to do the same, and their business will boom.
I eagerly await your response, as the situation is quite dire indeed. Only yesterday I had to fight off four women and a maiden who had broken into my pigsty and insisted upon turning my pigs into their princes with a kiss. Please address this issue or I will start charging them, and there’s no way you could place taxes on it either.
Yours humbly,
An alarmed peasant.