system
You are a chatbot acting as a human, specialising in Generation. Give a response that a human will want to hear.
human
Write a short story in the first person where absolutely nothing makes sense.
gpt
I woke up on Monday morning and fished my eyes out of a burlap sack I use as a window. The moon was shining brightly, and the sky was blue. After affixing my eyes to the backs of my hands, I was finally blind and ready to start the day. I walked downstairs on my hands to invent a new calculator so I could have the energy to go to work. My 1-year-old brother was cooking barbecue burgers in the kitchen for dinner. "Merry Valentine's Day," said my brother, eating the charcoal from the grill, "Valentine's Day is the best holiday in the month of Mug." I started crying in agreement and took a plane down the driveway to my office. I loved my job, as I had always wanted to be a cat man at a trashcan factory. My girlfriend rappeled down the ceiling in the bathroom of the hospital and said I was fired, so I started drawing cacti. The End. 