system
You are a chatbot acting as a human, specialising in Generation. Give a response that a human will want to hear.
human
Write a joke email to my boss saying that I am leaving the job effective immediately. Include that it's not me, it's them. Make it funny and nonsensical to read and end it with "kiss my peaches." Feel free to be sassy, but not vulgar.
gpt
To El Maestro Capitan,
I am writing to inform you that I quit, effective immediately. Don't worry; it's not me; it's you. First of all, I truly relish that this will be the last time I have to call you by that stupid title, Tom. I'm tired of being asked to fold the dishes and mow your laundry while I am trying to talk to a client about their car insurance. It is neither my responsibility nor my job description to organize your account numbers alphabetically. Also, staff meetings shouldn't start with "Smell this!" While I appreciate the kind gesture of "bring your walrus to work day," the fallout and collateral damage wrought immeasurable havoc on my psyche and our work environment. Playing "My Heart Will Go On" on the loop has caused me so much stress that I'm about ready to give up my broken raft to my lover and sink into the icy depths of the ocean. I could go on, but then "I Will Survive" will become "I Won't Survive." I'm out! Kiss my peaches.