Nikhileshh/Mental-Health-1 huggingface dataset:
Question: I’m a man, and I’m soon to be married. I have been messing around with other men on the side. It started as a once in a while thing, but it’s been happening a lot. I don't know what to do.

Response: Good for you to bring up this situation for addressing, especially  before you and your partner are married and have all the legal responsibilities of married life.You gave yourself the biggest clue as to where to start solving this problem.Since you don't know what to do, then for right now postpone your wedding date.Whether your drive toward other men relates to feeling sexually unfulfilled with your fiancé, or you're not as willing to commit to your fiancé as you imagined yourself to be, or there are other relationship problems not being addressed with your fiancé, these need to be identified and understood.Since marriage is a commitment of one's life to another person's life, then without the willingness to commit you are almost guaranteeing future problems in the upcoming marriage.
Question: I’m a man, and I’m soon to be married. I have been messing around with other men on the side. It started as a once in a while thing, but it’s been happening a lot. I don't know what to do.

Response: I would start by examining the reasons for seeking out other relationships. Are you getting something from the other men that you do not currently receive from your current partner? Such as, is it more exciting with others and that excitement is lacking in your current relationship?
Question: I’m a man, and I’m soon to be married. I have been messing around with other men on the side. It started as a once in a while thing, but it’s been happening a lot. I don't know what to do.

Response: Divorce is expensive emotionally and financially. If your fiance is not ok with an open marriage, it would be a good idea to seek the help of a counselor before you get married.
Question: I’m a man, and I’m soon to be married. I have been messing around with other men on the side. It started as a once in a while thing, but it’s been happening a lot. I don't know what to do.

Response: If you are happy with the person that you are about to be married to and are also enjoying time with other men, it could be possible that you are attracted to people of more than one gender.Having said that, some people have feelings toward people of more than one gender that are not really related to romance or attraction, but any number of other feelings, such as trust and communication. I don't know whether your use of the phrase "messing around" was related specifically to being romantically or sexually involved with the people who you are or referring to or if you are saying that you are enjoying spending time with them. These terms have different definitions for almost everyone.I would definitely recommend speaking with a local mental health practitioner in your area, not because there is anything wrong about the way you are feeling, but because there are a lot of different parts of what is happening in your life right now and it may be helpful to talk about the feelings and thoughts with someone who can help you to learn more about yourself and the people are most important in your life (yourself included).I also suggest looking at a few things that you love and appreciate about yourself.
Question: She has lied about every aspect of her life. She's created three fake relationships. The most recent one is concerning because she has fake photos, phone calls, and text messages, and it’s with a married man with kids. Her lying is becoming dangerous because she could ruin lives.

Response: Is being friends with this person safe for you?Liars don't generally distinguish who they bring down with them or in service to themselves.Step one is to understand a true friendship, which is based on trust, is probably not possible with this person.If you'd like to offer words of advice to protect her from herself then try gently pointing out that some of her actions which you know about, may come around to harm her.There is only a small chance she will be open to hearing you.People who lie are also very fearful of trusting others, including themselves.  She may prefer to keep status quo than open her own emotional pain to understand what created the need to lie in the first place.
Question: She has lied about every aspect of her life. She's created three fake relationships. The most recent one is concerning because she has fake photos, phone calls, and text messages, and it’s with a married man with kids. Her lying is becoming dangerous because she could ruin lives.

Response: Have an honest and open conversation with her about how her behavior is negatively impacting you ( and others).  You will feel good knowing you did the right thing.
Question: She has lied about every aspect of her life. She's created three fake relationships. The most recent one is concerning because she has fake photos, phone calls, and text messages, and it’s with a married man with kids. Her lying is becoming dangerous because she could ruin lives.

Response: To be honest, I think more information would be really important here because what you are asking could have a lot of different meanings. Consider making an appointment with a local therapist to discuss what you are going through.
Question: My boyfriend lost his dad to suicide. He says that because his dad died, so did his heart. He says that he can't be there for me or love me anymore and wants nothing to do with me ever again. Why is he doing this when we were very happy together? He says that I have done nothing wrong but he just can't be with me.

Response: I am sorry to learn of this.  You must be extremely frustrated and heartbroken.  To begin, he is correct.  You have done nothing wrong.  This is entirely a coping mechanism in overdrive.  It is fear.  It is anger.  It is extreme sadness.  It is feelings of abandonment.  It is intense emotional pain.  It is his way of protecting himself from potential unexpected additional loss.I am not familiar with how old this post is, but often, it will require time and understanding.  If he speaks with you, encourage him to get grief counseling.  Do not encourage it for your relationship, encourage it for his betterment coping with losing his dad.  Start there.  Good Luck.
Question: Ever since my ex-boyfriend and I broke up, I can't seem to get close to anyone else. I know I'm completely over him, but I just can't break down my walls and let someone new into my life.

Response: Hi Bend, You're scared, right? That makes sense. Each time we have a break-up we are a bit more in touch with how much is at stake in this whole love and relationship business. We are falling in love and letting someone close to our hearts and there's a vulnerability in that; we can get hurt. Who you partner with long-term is a big decision and it determines 90% of our happiness in life. The good news is that when we're just starting to get to know someone, we can take it slow. I think maybe you are slowing yourself down instinctively here, and that's okay. We are naturally people of attachment and it won't likely last if you are normally an open and accessible person who doesn't put up walls. So part of what I want to say here is don't pressure yourself too much. Take the time to heal naturally and listen to your instinct that is telling you to take things slow. :)As well, there are a few things you can do to make sure that the walls do eventually come down, or will come down for the right person. First, think about the lessons you learned from this past relationship. What do you feel proud of? What do you need in a partner? What mistakes did you make? Use this experience to grow in your awareness of how you work in a relationship and what you need from a partner.Look at your thoughts. Are you having generalized negative thoughts like "No one will ever love me again?", or "I'm going to get hurt again", or "I can't trust myself"? If so, write down what these thoughts are, and then ask yourself what evidence supports these thoughts. Fear tries to convince us that there is either something wrong with us or that something bad will happen, but it does so with little or no evidence of this ever happening!! It sells us a line based on no concrete evidence. Then ask yourself what evidence supports the opposite thought. What is the evidence that I am lovable... that there are safe, good people out there... that I can trust myself? Eliminate the negative thoughts, and add the positive ones. It's simple but very powerful.Lastly, take concrete and careful steps to act as though there are no walls. What is the evidence of the walls? Can you take purposeful baby steps in the direction of lowering those walls? When we act as though something is true, we start to feel it and believe it more.I hope you will find yourself back on track eventually, with time. :)
Question: When my boyfriend gets in a snit, he gives me the silent treatment for days. When I ask what is wrong, I get nothing: no reply, no phone call. If he does reply, it is something very sarcastic and hurtful. He never admits he is wrong and never apologizes.

Response: You are in an abusive relationship-not because of your boyfriend's silences but because he is comfortable being sarcastic and hurtful, never admits he is wrong and never apologizes. It is your choice to participate in an abusive relationship. You can not stop an abusive partner from being abusive no matter how wonderfully you treat your partner. You can either accept the terrible relationship as it is or reach out for the support that you need to leave the abusive relationship. I wish you well, always.
Question: When my boyfriend gets in a snit, he gives me the silent treatment for days. When I ask what is wrong, I get nothing: no reply, no phone call. If he does reply, it is something very sarcastic and hurtful. He never admits he is wrong and never apologizes.

Response: This has to be very difficult to endure.It's pretty common for members of a couple to have different ways of resolving conflict. Very often, one person wants to deal with the conflict right away or shortly thereafter and the other person wants to wait. One thing that sometimes works is to consider having a conversation when you are not upset with one another about taking some sort of timeout and setting a timeframe for something like "I cannot talk about this now, but we can talk about it in two hours."My best guess is that your boyfriend is triggered by some previous relationship, either romantic or in childhood. If he is aware of something that he thinks or feels when you ask him to resolve conflict or to discuss it, it would be good to know what that is. It could even be that he's learned to handle conflict that way.Something else you could try is to have a conversation where you each discuss what is acceptable for what is acceptable for each of you during an argument and what is not. These sorts of discussions can be very difficult and you may benefit from working through them with a mental health professional who has some experience working with couples.As far as what you can do now, perhaps you can remind yourself that these things have worked out before, that you love him and believe that he loves you, or some other statements that are true for you. You may also consider finding ways to soothe yourself. For example, you may find that you like certain outdoor activities or reading a certain type of book or something else that gives you pleasure.
Question: When my boyfriend gets in a snit, he gives me the silent treatment for days. When I ask what is wrong, I get nothing: no reply, no phone call. If he does reply, it is something very sarcastic and hurtful. He never admits he is wrong and never apologizes.

Response: As you say, if he does reply it is hurtful. But, if he doesn't reply, it sounds like it's just as hurtful (though more in my opinion in terms of the longer-range effects on the relationship). The behavior he is exhibiting would easily pass for "passive-aggression," as it is manipulative and controlling through passive withdrawal behaviors. And I can assure you that you are not alone in struggling with how to deal with it. So many do, and that's why it gets done so often, because it can. For example, if you push for connection, he stonewalls even more. You probably become more distressed.Frankly, if you and your boyfriend were sitting on my couch in therapy, I'd likely say that the behavior needs to stop in order for the relationship to continue, because of how severe it sounds (an hour of withdrawal because someone can't deal is reasonable, as everyone can shut down from time to time, but this feels extreme and is extremely hurtful to you.) I might even say to him that the behavior needs to stop if he ever wants to be in a healthy, loving, connected relationship. Because the amount that you describe him disconnecting severely hurts trust and security. One of the first "change events" in Emotionally-Focused Couples Therapy is for the person doing the withdrawing to be able to use words and communication to help the partner understand what they are experiencing, so the burden does fall more on him at the beginning. It becomes the partner's job to tolerate though whatever his experience is.There is no one "tried and true" solution to working with passive-aggression, but I would most advise limit-setting (like I would do in our session). In one way, shape, or form, in order for the behavior to stop, there has to be consequences to it. The more you tolerate it and allow him to come back to you when he's done with his silent tantrum, the more you encourage the behavior because he is getting what he wants.
Question: When my boyfriend gets in a snit, he gives me the silent treatment for days. When I ask what is wrong, I get nothing: no reply, no phone call. If he does reply, it is something very sarcastic and hurtful. He never admits he is wrong and never apologizes.

Response: Try during a good moment between you to tell him you'd like to talk over something about your relationship and that you'd like to set a time with him to do so.When a person shuts down and withdraws, the only choice is to withdraw yourself.   If this continues on a regular basis, after a while the two of you will become increasingly distant and have developed the very unhappy habit of not clearing the air between the two of you.Good for you to recognize a problem and be willing to address it!
Question: When my boyfriend gets in a snit, he gives me the silent treatment for days. When I ask what is wrong, I get nothing: no reply, no phone call. If he does reply, it is something very sarcastic and hurtful. He never admits he is wrong and never apologizes.

Response: This sounds very hurtful for you to be on the receiving end of this. You can ask yourself " what am I learning from the way I am being treated? "  and consider whether or not this is in fact either (1)  A message or value that you agree with and believe will strengthen your relationship and help you to grow as a person or (2)  A message or value that is damaging to the relationship or  to your view of your self and others.  Once you've considered that and come to your own conclusion, you will likely know what you need to do.  If you're still stuck, you may want to consider seeing an individual therapist for yourself  to process your feelings about the relationship or a couples therapist with your partner to work on improving your communication with each other.
Question: My husband cheated while I was pregnant with our son with a so-called friend. This was before we were married. We split and eventually worked things out. I thought I trusted him so we got married. Now he flirts with girls in front of me. I've talked to him, but nothing helps.

Response: This sounds very painful for you.Are you able to tell him how his flirting affects you?Maybe he doesn't care enough to change, and maybe he does.Long term if he continues this then usually people feel they have two choices, put up with it, which of course greatly reduces the sense of satisfaction in the relationship.   Or, of course, you can decide to end the relationship.  This choice is quite significant now that you have a child together.  Give yourself plenty of time to think over the best outcome.
Question: The father of my kids and I have been broken up for about three years now. We always found our way back to each other. He had a baby with someone else he's with but still shows the same love he showed when we was together when he's around. He even gets jealous, but he ignores my calls.

Response: Your story sounds like it gives you a great deal of tension and disappointment.You know you are not getting the amount of love and kind of relationship you'd like.It is almost as though you feel that "something is better than nothing".Reflect within yourself whether the balance of what you receive in this relationship is worth the sacrifice of not getting as much love as you wish.Depending on your decision you will know whether to drop this relationship or continue the same as its been.
Question: Every day for five years, my husband mentally abused me and said he will change. I have a child with him. I try so hard to stay strong for her, but at this point, I am completely broken. I am holding on to nothing but hope and have been for years. Is there any hope or am I wasting my time?

Response: I think your own awareness will not allow you to continue in a bad relationship.Be glad something within you is telling you that there are better ways to be treated than how your husband does.For support and guidance in real time, look up the organizations in your area which help women to leave abusive relationships.You are not the first or only one and probably not the last woman who wants to leave an abusive partner.  Having guidance particular to you and your situation will help you move through what decisions to make as to how to leave this man.
Question: My boyfriend and I have been disagreeing on a lot lately. It's really coming down to the fact that we want opposite things sometimes. I do a lot for him: I take care and protect him, and in the end, he still doesn't trust me. We've both come to the conclusion that when I want something and he doesn't want it, he's not willing to find a happy medium whatsoever. It's just non-negotiable. I'm not sure what to do honestly. He doesn't trust me as much as I wish he did. Honestly, sometimes I feel like his enemy, and it kills me.

Response: There’s a difference between what you want, what you need and what you have. Being able to assertively identify express your wants and needs to your boyfriend may be helpful in times of negotiation. Often couples focus on recounting all the negative traits and issues when is time to negotiate and that impairs the ability to explore and find solutions objectively.You could use couples mediation to learn assertive communication skills and filter the information needed to resolve or negotiate a solution. Mi novio no transa conmigoÚltimamente, mi novio y yo hemos tenido muchos desacuerdos. Todo se debe al hecho de que queremos cosas diferentes.  Yo hago mucho por él, lo cuido y protejo, y al final, el no confía en mí.  Ambos hemos llegado a la conclusión que cuando yo quiero algo que él no quiere, él no está dispuesto a encontrar el punto medio.  No es negociable.  No estoy segura de que hacer. El no confía en mi tanto como quisiera que lo hiciera, a veces siento su enemiga y eso me mata. Hay una gran diferencia entre lo que quieres, lo que necesitas y lo que tienes.  Poder identificar y expresar asertivamente lo que quieres y necesitas en tu relación te ayudara en los momentos de negociación.   Muchas veces las parejas se enfocan en recontar todos los problemas y características negativas a la hora de negociar, y eso les impide hablar claramente del problema presente e identificar soluciones específicas.Pueden usar la mediación de parejas para aprender técnicas de comunicación asertiva y tener asistencia filtrando e identificando la información que les ayudara a resolved o negociar una solución al problema.
Question: I have been pushing people away all my life. I finally have a great boyfriend who loves me, but I keep pushing him away and I don't want to. I need to learn to open up.

Response: Figuring out the space we need between ourselves and others is an ongoing and unsolvable task.  But it sounds like you may be feeling stuck in a pattern of pushing people away and are wanting to change that.  Pushing others away may be your way of surviving relationships and may have proven to be very helpful at one point in your life.  Or it may be serving some other purpose.  One helpful way to consider changing that is to seek out a therapist.  Psychotherapy can provide you with a relationship that is in tune to you and that can provide the reflection and supportive challenges to help determine the function the 'pushing away' is serving.  It also may be helpful for you to take time to reflect on the moments when interpersonal guardedness snuck its way into the interaction.  What were you feeling right before this?  Did it provide relief?  Reflecting on what was happening just before and right after can provide some clues as to what purpose the 'pushing away' serves.It may be helpful to communicate to the boyfriend how you experience intimacy and the discomfort it can bring you at times.  This may help him be as sensitive as you need him to be about the pace of the relationship, and to understand what may be happening when you push him away.
Question: I have been dating my boyfriend for eight years. We met in college off away from home and things went from good to bad when I met his family who treats him like he is their man. They expect him to take them on dates like to the movies and out to eat when they come around, and he thinks it's okay.

Response: Well, then you learned something new about your boyfriend!Are you fine with having a different opinion than him and staying together.Think over how major a problem this is to you and if it is reason enough to leave the relationship.There are always plenty of areas of disagreement between partners in a relationship.The key to being happy is to know which ones you can accept and which ones are beyond your tolerance with which to live.Also, an early step would be to directly tell your boyfriend your opinion.   He may be willing to change his ways to satisfy you.
Question: He's lied about his past/present situations. Since time has passed, he has changed, but I still have my doubts. I have no idea if I should stay or go, but I hate this feeling. I don't trust him all too much, but yet he hasn't done anything for me not to trust him recently.

Response: Your doubts about your dating partner need to be addressed and solved so you can fully believe him again.Otherwise how would you actually know whether he's lying to you now or not?Start the conversation with him about wanting to trust him and asking for whatever details you feel will give you confidence he is telling you the truth.If he really wants to clear your doubts then he will be willing to invest in answering your extra questions or wanting to look through his phone or whatever areas you felt were violated by him in the past.
Question: My fiancé of 15 years is always helping out his family, and I feel like his family takes advantage of his kindness. We're about to get married this Saturday, but I feel like he is always gonna put them first instead of myself and our three kids. I am not enjoying our engagement at all.

Response: Congrats on your upcoming wedding!Have you told the thoughts you write here, to your fiancé ?This is the place to start since you clearly are unhappy with a part of his and now your life, which will be with you for quite some time.