the human mind not only do we fail to see ourselves as others see us but we have not the faintest conception of ourselves as we are an incident which might have proved to me how shallow was the depth of my supposed feeling and that it was nothing more than a strong sex desire was this one night about twelve a message to the republic stated that on a branch extension of one of the car lines about seven or eight miles from the city a had just been committed three entering a lone owl car which ran from the city to a small village had shot and killed the conductor and fired on the a young girl who had been on board the only passenger had escaped by the front door and had not since been heard of � or so the message stated as i happened to be in the office at the time the story was assigned to me by good luck i managed to catch a twelve o clock car and arrived at the end of the line at twelve forty where i learned that the body of the dead man had been transferred to his home at some point farther out and that a of male of the region had already been organized and were now helping the police to search this country round for the when i asked about the girl who had been on board one of the men at the bam exclaimed sure she s a chapter l all love contain an element of the i presume but to each how very important i will pass mine over with what i have already said save this that each little in her costume however slight in her or the way she looked or walked amid new all seemed to re the perfection that i had discovered and was so fortunate as to possess she gave me her photograph which i framed in silver and hung in my room i begged for a lock of her hair and finding a bit of blue ribbon that i knew belonged to her that she would not allow me to visit at where she taught being about this new relationship but on several sundays when she was at her home up the state i visited this glorious region by her presence and tried to decide for myself just where she lived and her sacred rooms a little later an or state fair was held in the enormous building at and olive streets and here when the were first on and later when the gay veiled began a sort of roman harvest rejoicing winding up with a great parade and ball i saw more of her than ever before it was during this time in a letter that she confessed that she loved me before this however seeing that i made no progress in any other way being allowed no intimacy beyond an occasional stolen kiss i had proposed to her and been accepted with a kind of morbid i had had to ask her in the most definite way and be formally accepted as her husband thereafter i my last cent to purchase a diamond ring at secured through a friend on the b e and then indeed i felt myself set up in the world as one who was destined to tread the conventional and peaceful ways of the majority a book about myself yet in spite of my profound i was still able to beauty in other women and be moved by it the attractions and which draw us away from one and to another are beginning to be more clearly understood in these days and to our more formal notions of and order but even at that time this in myself might have taught me to look with suspicion on my own emotions i think i did imagine that i was a scoundrel in after other women when i was so deeply involved with this one but i told myself that i must be peculiarly in this way that all men were not so that i myself should and probably would hold myself in check eventually etc all of which merely proves how and non self understanding can be the processes of the human mind not only do we fail to see ourselves as others see us but we have not the faintest conception of ourselves as we really are an incident which might have proved to me how shallow was the depth of my supposed feeling and that it was nothing more than a strong sex desire was this one night about twelve a message to the republic stated that on a branch extension of one of the car lines about seven or eight miles from the city a murder had just been committed three entering a lone car which ran from the city to a small village had shot and killed the conductor and fired on the a young girl who had been on board the only passenger had escaped by the front door and had not since been heard of � or so the message stated as i happened to be in the office at the time the story was assigned to me by good luck i managed to catch a twelve o clock car and arrived at the end of the line at twelve forty where i learned that the body of the dead man had been transferred to his home at some point farther out and that a of male of the region had already been organized and were now helping the police to search this country round for the when i asked about the girl who had been on board one of the men at the bam exclaimed sure she s a chapter l all love contain an element of the ridiculous i presume but to each how very important i will pass mine over with what 