merit than smelling like a livery stables and being able to walk across me more like a fly than a human being while the horses were at a a distrust of myself which has often beset me in on small occasions when it would have been better away was assuredly not stopped in its growth by this little incident outside the coach it was in vain to take refuge in of speech i spoke from the pit of my stomach for the rest of the journey but i felt completely extinguished and dreadfully young it was curious and interesting nevertheless to be sitting up there behind four horses well educated well dressed and with plenty of money in my pocket and to look out for the places where i had slept on my weary journey i had abundant occupation for my thoughts in every conspicuous on the road when i looked down at the whom we passed and saw that well remembered style of face turned up i felt as if the s blackened hand were in the bosom of my shirt again when we through the narrow street of and i caught a glimpse in passing of the lane where the old monster lived who had bought my jacket i stretched my neck eagerly to look for the place where i had sat in the sun and in the shade waiting for my money when we came at last within a stage of london and passed the veritable house where mr had laid about him with a heavy hand i would have given all i had for lawful permission to get down and him and let all the boys out like so many we went to the golden cross at cross then a sort of establishment in a close neighbourhood a waiter showed me into the coffee room and a introduced me to my small which smelt like a coach and was shut up like a family vault i was still painfully conscious of my youth for nobody stood in any awe of me at all the being utterly indifferent to my opinions on any subject and the waiter being familiar with me and offering advice to my well now said the waiter in a tone of confidence what would you like for dinner young gentlemen likes poultry in general have a fowl the personal history and experience i told him as as i could that i wasn t in the humour for a fowl ain t you said the waiter young gentlemen is generally tired of beef and mutton have a i assented to this proposal in of being able to suggest anything else do you care for said the waiter with an smile and his head on one side young gentlemen generally has been with i commanded him in my deepest voice to order a and potatoes and all things fitting and to inquire at the bar if there were any letters for � which i knew there were not and couldn t be but thought it manly to appear to expect he soon came back to say that there were none at which i was much surprised and began to lay the cloth for my dinner in a box by the fire while he was so engaged he asked me what i would take with it and on my replying half a pint of thought it a favourable opportunity i am afraid to extract that measure of wine from the stale at the of several small i am of this opinion because while i was reading the newspaper i observed him behind a low wooden which was his private apartment very busy pouring out of a number of those vessels into one like a and making up a when the wine came too i thought it flat and it certainly had more english in it than were to be expected in a foreign wine in anything like a pure state but i was enough to drink it and say nothing being then in a pleasant frame of mind from which i infer that is not always disagreeable in some stages of the process i resolved to go to the play it was garden theatre that i chose and there from the back of a centre box i saw and the new to have all those noble alive before me and walking in and out for my entertainment instead of being the stern they had been at school was a most novel and delightful effect but the mingled reality and mystery of the whole show the influence upon me of the poetry the lights the music the company the smooth changes of glittering and brilliant scenery were so dazzling and opened up such regions of delight that when i came out into the rainy street at twelve o clock at night i felt as if i had come from the clouds where i had been leading a romantic for ages to a link lighted umbrella struggling muddy miserable world i had emerged by another door and stood in the street for a little while as if i really were a stranger upon earth but the pushing and that i received soon recalled me to myself and put me in the road back to the hotel whither i went revolving the glorious vision all the way and where after some porter and i sat revolving it still at past one o clock with my eyes on the coffee room fire i was so filled with the play and with the past � for it was in a manner like a shining through which i saw my earlier life moving along � that i don t know when the figure of a handsome well formed young op david dressed with a easy which i have reason to remember very well became a real presence to me but i recollect being conscious of ins company without having noticed his coming 