management of the house and servants the two elder sisters killed time in the way they thought would give least offence to their neighbours being all st s girls the conversation immediately turned on life was madam this there had madam that left garden chapel school hall were visited every was passed in review and in the lightness and gaiety of the memories even these maiden ladies flushed and looked fresh again the conversation came to a pause and then allusion was made to the disturbed state of the by muslin c and to a gentleman who it was reported was going to be married as did not know the person whose were being called into question she took an early opportunity of asking if she cared for riding no they never went to ride now they used to but they came in so fatigued that they could not talk to so they had given up riding did they care for driving r yes pretty well but there was no place to drive to except into and as people had been unjust enough to say that they were always to be seen in they had given up driving � unless of course they went to call on friends then tea was brought in and of a casual reference to toast the five girls talked until nearly six o clock of their of things that would never have any farther influence in their lives of happiness they would never experience again at last and pleaded that they must be going home as they walked across the fields the girls only spoke occasionally strove to see clear but her thoughts were clouded scattered diffused force herself as she would still no conclusion seemed possible all was vague and contradictory she had talked to these seen how they lived could guess what their past was what their future must be in that neat little house their life away in maiden idleness neither hope nor despair broke the of their days � and yet was it their fault no for what could they do if no one would marry them � a woman could do nothing without a husband by muslin there is a reason for the existence of a pack horse but none for that of an unmarried woman she achieve nothing � she has no but by herself out to shield herself from the attacks of ever friends had looked forward to a husband and a home as the certain accomplishment of years now she saw that a woman of her own will may remain single i wonder she said forgetting for the moment she was speaking to i wonder none of those married you can t call them ugly girls and they hare some money how dreadfully lonely they must be living there by themselves i think they are far happier as they are said and her brown eyes set in liquid blue looked strangely at as she helped her over the low wall the girls walked in silence through the stillness of the silver their thoughts as sharp as the needles that scratched the pale sky it may seem odd of me to say of course i would not say this to anyone but you � but i assure you even if i were as tall as you are dear nothing would induce me to marry i never took the slightest pleasure in any man s conversation do you but i know you do she said breaking off suddenly � i know you like men i feel you do don t yon v well since you put it so plainly i confess i should like to know nice men i don t care for those i have met hitherto particularly those i saw at dinner the other night but i believe there are nice men in the world oh no there aren t by muslin well i don t see how you can speak so positively as that you have seen as yet very little of the world ah yes but i know it i can guess it all i know it instinctively and i hate it there is nothing else so we must make the best of it but there is something else � there is god and the love of beautiful things i spent all day yesterday playing s passion music and the hours passed like a dream until my sisters came in from walking and began to talk about marriage and men it made me feel sick � it was horrible and it is such things that make me hate life � and i do hate it it is the way we are brought back to earth and forced to realize how vile and degraded we are society seems to me no better than a but in the beautiful � that we shall alas never see again � it was not so there at least life was pure � yes and beautiful do you not remember that beautiful white church with all its white pillars and statues and the dark and the girls their falling from their bent heads they often seemed to me like angels i am sure that heaven must be very much like amazed looked at her friend for she had never heard her speak like this before but did not see her the prominent eyes of the mystic were veiled with strange and with divine she the sweetness of the vision and after a long silence she said by muslin i often wonder how you can think as a do and strange to say no one you are an you re so good in all except that one point but surely dear it isn t a merit to believe it is hardly a thing that we can call into existence you should pray for faith i don t see how i can pray if i haven t faith you re too clever but 