musing on the subject because it perplexed him it was a gift � those were her words admitting it to be a gift he thought she could hardly value a friend more than him and giving the flower into his charge would have made no difference except indeed it was the gift of a lover he murmured i wonder if ever has had a lover before he said aloud as a new idea quite this and companion thoughts were enough to occupy him completely till he fell asleep � rather later than usual the next day when they were again alone he said to her rather do you love me more or less for what i told you on board the steamer you told me so many things she returned lifting her eyes to his and smiling i mean the confession you out of me � that i had never had a sweetheart before it is a satisfaction i suppose to be the first in your heart she said to him with an attempt to continue her smiling i am going to ask you a question now said knight somewhat awkwardly i only ask it in a way you know not with great seriousness you may think it odd perhaps tried desperately to keep the color in her face she could not though distressed to think that getting pale showed consciousness of deeper guilt than merely getting red o no � i shall not think that she said because obliged to say something to fill the pause which followed her s remark it is this have you ever had a lover am almost sure you have not but have you � not as it were a lover i mean not worth mention ing harry she faltered knight in as v c ing to be felt some sickness of heart o a pair of ue e yes still he was a lover well a sort of lover i suppose she responded a man i mean you know yes but only a mere person and � but truly your lover yes a lover certainly � he was that yes he might have been called my lover knight said nothing to this for a minute or more and kept silent time with his finger to the of the library clock in which room the was going on you don t mind harry do you she said anxiously close to him and watching his face of course i don t seriously mind in reason a man cannot object to such a trifle i only thought you hadn t � that was all however one ray was abstracted from the glory about her head but afterwards when knight was wandering by himself over the bare and hills and meditating on the subject that ray suddenly returned for she might have had a lover and never have cared in the least for him she might have used the word and meant admirer all the time of course she had been admired and one man might have made his admiration more prominent than that of the rest � a very natural case they were sitting on one of the garden seats when he found occasion to put the question to the test did you love that lover or admirer of yours ever so little she murmured reluctantly yes i think i did knight felt the same faint touch of misery only a very little he said i am not sure how much slightly but you are sure darling you loved him a little i think i am sure i loved him a little and not a great deal my love was not supported by reverence for his powers but did you love him deeply said rest ess y i don t exactly d by deeply that s nonsense a pair of ue e yes you and you have let go my hand she cried her eyes filling with tears harry don t be severe with me and don t question me i did not love him as i do you and could it be deeply if i did not think him than myself for i did not you grieve me so much � you can t think i will not say another word about it and you will not think about it either will you i know you think of weaknesses in me after i am out of your sight and not knowing what they are i cannot combat them i almost wish you were of a nature harry in truth i do or rather i wish i could have the advantages such a nature in you would afford me and yet have you as you are what advantages would they be less anxiety and more security ordinary men are not so delicate in their tastes as you and where the lover or husband is not fastidious and refined and of a deep nature things seem to go on better i fancy � as far as i have been able to observe the world yes j i suppose it is right has this advantage that you can t be drowned there but i think i ll have you as you are yes i will she said the practical husbands and wives who take things are very are they not yes it would kill me quite you please me best as you are even though i wish you had never cared for one before me yes and you must not wish it don t i try not to so she hoped but her heart was troubled if he felt so deeply on this point what would he say did he know all and see it as mrs saw it he would never make her the happiest girl in the world by taking her to be his own for aye the thought enclosed her as a tomb whenever it presented itself to her brain she tried to believe that 