made her as able as she was willing to be generous but she was so wholly unused to confer except on the very poor so in removing evils or among her equals and so fearful of appearing to herself as a great lady at home that it took some time to determine that it would not be in her to make such a present park it was made however at last a silver knife was bought for and accepted with great delight its giving it every advantage over the other that could be desired was established in the full possession of her own handsomely declaring that now she had got one so much prettier herself she should never want that again and no reproach seemed conveyed to the equally satisfied mother which had almost feared to be impossible the deed thoroughly answered a source of domestic was entirely done away and it was the means of opening s heart to her and giving her something more to love and be interested in showed that she had delicacy pleased as she was to be mistress of property which she had been struggling for at least two years she yet feared that her sister s judgment had been against her and that a reproof was designed her for having so struggled as to make the purchase necessary for the tranquillity of the house her temper was open she acknowledged her fears blamed herself for having so warmly and from that hour understanding the worth of her disposition and perceiving how fully she was inclined to seek her good opinion and refer to her judgment began to feel again the blessing of affection and to entertain the hope of being useful to a mind so much in need of help and so much deserving it she gave advice � advice too sound to be resisted by a good understanding and given so mildly and as not to an imperfect park per � and she had the happiness of observing its good effects not more was not expected by one who while seeing all the obligation and of submission and forbearance saw also with sympathetic of feeling all that must be grating to a girl like her greatest wonder on the subject soon became � not that should have been provoked into and impatience against her better knowledge � but that so much better knowledge so many good notions should have been hers at all and that brought up in the midst of and error she should have formed such proper opinions of what ought to be � she who had had no cousin to direct her thoughts or fix her principles the intimacy thus begun between them was a material advantage to each by sitting together upstairs they avoided a great deal of the disturbance of the house had peace and learnt to think it no misfortune to be quietly employed they sat without a fire but that was a familiar even to and she suffered the less because reminded by it of the east room it was the only point of resemblance in space light furniture and prospect there was nothing alike in the two apartments and she often heaved a sigh at the remembrance of all her books and boxes and various comforts there by degrees the girls came to spend the chief of the morning upstairs at first only in working and talking but after a few days the remembrance of the said books grew so potent and park that found it impossible not to try for books again there were none in her father s house but wealth is luxurious and daring and some of hers found its way to a library she became a amazed at being anything in amazed at her own doings in every way to be a a of books and to be having any one s improvement in view in her choice but so it was had read nothing and longed to give her a share in her own first pleasures and inspire a taste for the biography and poetry which she delighted in herself in this occupation she hoped moreover to bury some of the recollections of which were too apt to seize her mind if her fingers only were busy and especially at this time hoped it might be useful in her thoughts from pursuing to london whither on the authority of her aunt s last letter she knew he was gone she had no doubt of what would the promised was hanging over her head the s knock within the neighborhood was beginning to bring its daily terrors and if reading could banish the idea for even half an hour it was something gained chapter xvii a week was gone since might b� supposed in town and had heard nothing of him there were three different conclusions to be drawn from his silence between which her mind was in � each of them at times being held the most probable � either his going had been again delayed or he had yet procured no opportunity of seeing miss alone or he was too happy for letter writing one morning about this time having now been nearly four weeks from � a point which she never failed to think over and calculate every day � as she and were preparing to remove as usual upstairs they were by the knock of a visitor whom they felt they could not avoid from s in going to the door � a duty which always interested her any other it was a gentleman s voice it was a voice that was just turning pale about when mr walked into the room good sense like hers will always act when really called upon and she found that she had been able to name him to her mother and recall her remembrance of the name as that of william s friend though she could not previously have 