 related anecdote i was eating in a restaurant in chinatown in boston the place was empty the only other customer was a white guy reading an asian language newspaper the guy asked the waiter for help translating a word eventually his story came out he had married an asian woman through one of these introduction services after about a year of marriage she had charged him with assault and left him leaving no contact information he was hanging around in chinatown asking random asians for help finding her i obviously don t know if he did assault her but what struck me was that the possibility of mutual exploitation is high anecdote number two in college i had a job as a street vendor there was a guy i worked with who was a lifer in the job he was a noticably messed up guy among other odd characteristics he fawned on women customers doing stuff like offering them flowers i asked him about it he said that he d never had sex with a woman who wasn t a prostitute and his dream was to save up enough money to get a mail order bride i was really moved the guy was a loon but he wanted a companion as much as anyone else and he was realistic about his chances 