 _ _ _____ _ __ the weekly high tech sarcastic update for the uk _ _ _ __ __NUMBER NUMBER NUMBER_ o join mail an empty message to _ _ o ntknow subscribe URL _ v v o website archive lives at _ _ _ _ _ _ _ ___ _ _ o URL a case in point is web designer matt jones the man responsible for how bbc news online looked when it launched since then he has invented warchalking which he recently described as a curse URL but you cannot turn against me i created you hard news stiffening sinews more hot summer days in the mailinglist alleyways dangerously empty of sane postings strewn with the rotting carcasses of broiling vacation messages hacktress and silicon valley s chief rat keeper lile elam excitedly posts about a new open NUMBER NUMBER network she s found i am here at the police station waiting to see a judge and i thought i would check to see if there is connectivity she writes somewhat recklessly to the bay area wireless list exit the rest of the wifi community through the nearest window and out into the streets where cooling tempers the microsoft palladium boys are on an endless summer tour reassuring the experts that while hmm they suppose pd could theoretically be used as a hollywood drm system they truly have no plans to do any such thing cypherpunk and friend of freedom lucky green hears this thinks up four or five of the obvious palladium drm implementations sends them off to be patented in his name licensing funds we imagine will go on cracking his own drms and so the mail loops on URL administrivia hi mom i m in jail URL green palladium like green kryptonite could lucky get himself arrested under the dmca for distributing a circumvention device worse now we have the eucd incoming could he here in the uk will alan cox go to jail for posting detailed changelogs will even the nicest uk cryptographer or curious garage tinkerer find themselves hauled up under our new and scarily dmcaish copyright regime find out the facts at the free fair deal for copyright conference organised by the irrepressible foundation for information policy research for wednesday NUMBER NUMBER NUMBER at the london school of economics all the usual fun from the creators of the scrambling for safety crypto cons we confidently predict government spokesmen caught in headlights wanton dave bird heckling some industry bigwig fighting off the audience with a broken chairleg and other epiphenomena of the interzone between legal minds and hacker ethics oh and fipr are still looking for a programme director so if you re interested let them know we suggested a convention raffle first prize the director s job second prize ross anderson as your personal slave for a day they say there s some rule that would break though URL doesn t the foundation use psychohistory for filling these positions for those of us who can t read the abbreviation eula without thinking of martian fighting machines and their deafening howls which roared like thunder we re sorry to report that this weekend s multimedia performance of jeff wayne s war of the worlds has been postponed due to health and safety issues the event was to feature computer graphics fireworks NUMBERft tall martian fighting machines wreaking havoc and destruction and most terrifyingly of all the possibility of a david essex tribute singer performing with hawkwind but ukpNUMBER tickets for the sat NUMBER NUMBER NUMBER show at manchester s heaton park will still be valid at a range of new venues next summer ironically the martians original invasion plans were similarly thwarted by health and safety issues slain after all man s devices had failed by the humblest creatures that god in his wisdom has put upon this earth bacteria minute invisible bacteria for directly the invaders arrived and drank and fed our microscopic allies attacked them URL from that moment they were doomed anti news berating the obvious moving on from puerile google misspellings weird search and replace artefact URL japanese fan sites for plince steery dan def reppard et al plus the NUMBER NUMBER or more self referential usenet sigs URL URL zerodowntime ad leads to URL slightly harsh alt text URL us military discovers the only translator those bastards seem to understand URL scary blue men herald return of the bizarre bbc hacking pics URL reporter ryan dilley URL pulls his URL face banjo maestro george formby still alive cooking black URL thanks guys that ought to do it URL event queue goto s considered non harmful controversially we re all in favour of the guardian great british blog competition closing date next fri NUMBER NUMBER NUMBER first prize ukpNUMBER entry free in that any initiative that encourages this notoriously primadonna ish community to try and engage with real world notions of editorial quality surely has to be a good thing our only disappointment is that the guardian appears to be focussing on the best of the entries when everyone knows the real fun is to be had cruising the truly terrible examples that the genre has to offer mentally allocating points for most depressing recycling of daypop top NUMBER urls most unsettling revelations about personal life plus of course most tedious linking reciprocal linking to other bloggers in absence of having anything interesting to say URL a strange game professor falken URL the only winning move is not to play tracking sufficiently advanced technology the gathering the respective trademark holders will hate this but windows really is like the sun you have this big hulking mass of concentrated power in the middle with a few small orbiting utilities like winzip and putty and vnc occasionally one will get a bit too close to the os and microsoft will suck it down and turn it into fuel for the system one such discrete satellite remains filezilla the still necessary ftp gui client for windows those who know it won t need the introduction although they might appreciate the note that it s getting close to vNUMBER NUMBER time for dogged ws_ftp users though it s got multiple downloads auto restart of interrupted loads queuing and sftp and kerberos support it s also gpl d which makes it a nice bit of source for anyone wanting to grok winNUMBER networking from something that works URL talking of trademarks will the godzilla people strike before ms memepool ceci n est pas une URL not safe for work next year s red nose day looks more fun than usual URL mirrored disaster recovery suite to go with mirrored bathroom etc URL and then the kid can take you to court for mental cruelty URL funny prefixes in front of chalking n NUMBER the actually quite pragmatic URL no longer knowing or caring if these are prank amazon reviews or not for potter s ever popular vibrating broom URL ditto use this software at your own risk disclaimer for URL daffy duck appears in dock accused of dethpicable behaviour URL URL geek media get out less tv celebrity cameo night tonight with brad pitt in friends NUMBERpm fri cNUMBER sydney pollack in will and grace NUMBER NUMBERpm fri cNUMBER dustin hoffman in v graham norton NUMBER NUMBERpm fri cNUMBER and a singing dancing peanut in globalised trade documentary alt tv NUMBER NUMBERpm fri cNUMBER the bbc have kept mcenroe and the heart monitor got rid of the live crocodiles in gimmicky quizshow the chair NUMBER NUMBERpm sat bbcNUMBER and a month of september NUMBERth specials kicks off with avenging terror NUMBERpm sat sun cNUMBER yet those responsible for bowfinger NUMBERpm sat cNUMBER and notting hill NUMBERpm sun cNUMBER still remain unpunished john the last seduction dahl s rounders NUMBERpm sat bbcNUMBER turns out to be about high stakes poker rather than the girls version of baseball in the wake of dave gorman s important astrology experiment NUMBER NUMBERpm sun bbcNUMBER how about a three way challenge where he tony hawks and pete mccarthy battle to come up with the most lucrative pointless pretext for a book and tv show but we still have a soft spot for ron alien resurrection perlman liberal self flagellation the last supper NUMBER NUMBERpm sun cNUMBER NUMBER NUMBER clear the skies NUMBERpm sun bbcNUMBER is a presumably uneventful account of how us air defence systems responded to the events of september NUMBERth inexplicably the three finalists in the tartiest men in britain NUMBER NUMBERpm mon itv all come from leeds larry clark takes a somewhat indirect approach to conveying his safe sex message in new york filth fest kids NUMBER NUMBERam tue cNUMBER and the september NUMBERth build up continues with how the twin towers collapsed NUMBERpm mon cNUMBER let s roll the story of flight NUMBER NUMBER NUMBERpm wed itv plus the meyssan conspiracy NUMBER NUMBERpm tue cNUMBER ie the french guy behind URL away from the polluted nightmare of modern living a family seek out a new way of life in earth summit tie in a land worth loving NUMBERpm wed bbcNUMBER which coincidentally also forms the plot of this week s second heather bowfinger graham turkey lost in space NUMBER NUMBERpm wed bbcNUMBER not to be confused with the return of those annoying posh women in world s worst dressed NUMBERpm wed bbcNUMBER who have at least shut up about their always doomed hideously purple e commerce site URL film the comic skills of cameron diaz christina applegate and parker posey combine in a cross between a teen smut comedy and an episode of sex and the city the sweetest thing URL as diaz and applegate drive down the road still dressed in just their bras and underwear applegate drops her bottle of fingernail polish diaz then goes over to get it with her panty covered butt in the air and her head down toward applegate s legs and crotch selma blair has her mouth stuck around a man s privates after apparently performing oral sex on him robin williams plays a surprisingly convincing hannibal lecter in morally complicated alaskan al pacino murder madness insomnia URL you can see crystal lowe s tits in autopsy photos and again along with bush when she s seen on a autopsy table nice boobs but she s dead it s eddie murphy randy quaid jay jerry maguire mohr john cleese and pam grier together at last in blaxploitation sci fi spoof the adventures of pluto nash URL the woman then causes the image of rosario kids dawson to suddenly have much larger breasts and an exaggeratedly large rear end all of which shockingly are an improvement on john woo interspersing lame battle scenes with agonising anti racist philosophising in wwNUMBER navajo crypto clunker windtalkers URL gambling beheading brief partial nudity of a japanese soldier i have no doubt that such gore is present in war but must it be regurgitated in and as entertainment small print need to know is a useful and interesting uk digest of things that happened last week or might happen next week you can read it on friday afternoon or print it out then take it home if you have nothing better to do it is compiled by ntk from stuff they get sent registered at the post office as yeah but bet we were banned first URL need to know they stole our revolution now we re stealing it back archive URL unsubscribe mail ntknow unsubscribe URL subscribe mail ntknow subscribe URL ntk now is supported by URL and by you URL k NUMBER special projects copying is fine but include url URL tips news and gossip to tips URL all communication is for publication unless you beg press releases from naive pr people to pr URL remember your work email may be monitored if sending sensitive material sending NUMBERkb attachments is forbidden by the geneva convention your country may be at risk if you fail to comply 