Online:Jester King Emeric

Jester King Emeric''' is an Argonian impersonating King Emeric during the Jester's Festival event. He can be found at a stage north of Daggerfall.

 
Related Quests




Quest-Related Events
The Jester's Festival
You can join the festivities by talking with Jester King Emeric at the event stage outside Daggerfall.
:''"I don't believe we've had the pleasure, I'd certainly remember a striking figure such as yourself. Why don't you make yourself comfortable? The celebration's just getting started, you know?"
:What are we celebrating?
:"Well, if you must know, it's a celebration in honor of my rival rulers: the Festival of Fools! Daggerfall is a center of cultural exchange, even backward silly idiot culture. It'll all be quite fun, I assure you."
:What sort of fun?
:"The Jester's Festival has something for everyone! Barbaric mud fights, Elven prancing, cavorting and carousing like heathens. I'm partial to it, really, just don't tell my wife."
:How do I join in?
:"If you stripped to your small clothes and paraded through town, I'd call it a good start!"''

Royal Revelry
If your first daily quest is with him, he'll say:
:"Come! The realm needs a champion and you happen to be standing here, so I dub thee my hero in the making."
:How may I be of service?

If you've been sent by Jester Queen Ayrenn, he'll say:
:"You must be the celebrant Ayrenn was going on about. I could certainly use some of your acclaimed good cheer."
:She mentioned you might need my help.

After the greeting, he'll continue to give you your quest:
:''"My superstitious queen has confiscated my array of Royal Majesters! The only illusionary dazzlers fit for a king. I can't impress my subjects with just any common prestidigitation! It would be trivial to whip up more with the right ingredients."
:Where would I find these ingredients?
:"There are some, um, "local attractions" that should have what I'm looking for, but they're no place for royalty. If you would risk venturing out on my behalf, I'll ensure you play a key role in today's festivities!"
:I'll find what you need, my king.
:"Good luck finding everything on my list.  I don't know that we've ever had a fatality at the Jester's Festival, but if you are the first, I'll make sure your name lives on in appropriate ignominy."
::Just what is an illusion dazzler?
:::"You've never seen an illusion dazzler? You're in for a treat! They're the pinnacle of awe-inspiring emanations! Radiant in color, resonant in percussion, slightly malodorous, and only harmful under the most ill-thought out circumstances."
::What's the real story behind the Jester's Festival?
:::"Now there's a foolish question for the ages! You're getting good at this. There are more inventive originations of the Jester's Festival than flies in Black Marsh, and bred twice as fast! I'd wager it ties closely to the discovery of drinking."
::Why did the queen confiscate your Royal Majesters?
:::"My dear Maraya clings terribly to her people's mistrust of magic almost as much as her natural severity … and sword. She seems to think that setting off hundreds of flashy magical projections in the city would be a public menace. Silly, isn't it?"

Once you have the necessary materials from the nearby delves, you can return to the Jester King.
:"Thwarted by my own queen in front of the other royalty. I can't be the laughing stock in my own kingdom!"
:I have your ingredients, majesty.
:"Aha! The day is saved! No one will question who wears the crown in my court after this! I promised you a key role in the festivities today, and I'm a man of my word!  I hereby entrust you with the honor of putting my royal prowess on display."
:What does that entail?
:"Take my illusion dazzlers to some suitably crowded locations in the city and give them a good shake and toss! My majestic creations will do the rest."
:I can handle that.
:"Perfect! Give me a moment to work my magic and I'll have you on your way with the finest flashing flourishes in the land!"
:As you wish, sire.

He will then take a moment to create his llusion dazzlers.
:Jester King Emeric: "Stand back and let your majesty make magic!"
:Jester King Emeric: "A pinch of this … a dash of that … give it a shake—"
:Jester King Emeric: "Voila …"
:Jester King Emeric: "Your dazzlers, my faithful subject!"

If you talk to him before picking up the fireworks.
:"Your dazzlers are right here. Go on. Don't be sheepish! They'll only explode when you want them to, on my honor!"

After you pick them up, he will have a final request.
:"My subjects await!  Just try not to light anyone important on fire. I'll never hear the end of it."

You can then take the dazzlers and set them off around the city. Once you have finished, you can return to Jester King Emeric.
:"I thought I heard the raucous cheers and playful pops of my handiwork echoing throughout the city. Your people loved the dazzlers, majesty.Tell me it was more than my imagination!"
:Your people loved the dazzlers, majesty.
:"Well, of course! In my experience my loyal subjects adore being showered in the affections of their king. Oh—ah, don't share that with the queen."

On you have received your payment and started A Noble Guest, he will still worry about his wife and you can ask him some pertinent questions.
:"Best not to be found conspiring against my wife anymore today. Easier to deny having ever met you when you're not standing right there, you understand. But if she happens to corner you, take our secret to the grave for your liege!"
::Why are you so afraid of your wife?
:::"Afraid! Why, I'm not afraid! I'm the king! Keeping my politically expedient queen happy is my duty as a devoted husband … and good diplomacy. But if you happen to see my lovely Maraya with her sword, give a whistle, would you?"
::Does King Emeric know you're impersonating him?
::"Oh, my simple servant, I'm simply dressed for the occasion! Though, I don't know why I didn't think to disguise myself sooner. I'd never have to worry about my wife finding me if I were an Argonian or something."
:::But you are an Argonian.
:::"Oh, so we start a rumor that I am actually an Argonian to throw her off my trail. That's much simpler. Brilliant idea! Glad I thought of it."

A Noble Guest
After you have completed his task, he may send you off to Ebonheart.
:"I'd say our work here is done. There are other kingdoms in desperate need of our merrymaking talents and I won't be one to let them down."
:Where are you headed?
:"Off to Ebonheart for a royal roast! There's only one thing I trust Jorunn's expertise in, and that's eating. You should join us as a guest of honor!"

Dialogue
While in Auridon or Stonefalls, you may overhear him taking with his fellow Jester Royalty.

Auridon
At the Vulkhel Guard Jester Stage:
:Jester King Jorunn: "Do you think there is anywhere we have missed? Any place where the Jester's Festival is not in full swinginess?"
:Jester King Emeric: "I imagine there is not much laughter in Coldharbour. Ever."
:Jester King Jorunn: "Not so! Legend speaks of a fool so great he laughs in the face of Daedra and keeps cheer alive in the darkness of Oblivion!"
:Jester King Emeric: " ? I can think of no greater fool."
:Jester King Jorunn: "Jorunn aspires to be an ass of such magnitude."

:Jester King Emeric: "Stop me if you've heard the tale of—ow!" (Jorunn hits Emeric)
:Jester King Jorunn: "This one has heard all your silly Breton stories."
:Jester King Emeric: "I was speaking to our subjects, not you, you man-sized ham!"
:Jester King Jorunn: "They do not look in need of a nap."
:Jester King Emeric: "But think of what mischief could be had if they were asleep!"

:Jester King Jorunn: "Is it true that High Elves only eat flowers and drink the light?"
:Jester King Emeric: "I would describe them as pesky weeds."
:Jester King Jorunn: "Jorunn could not live such a life. Is he to starve and discover soberness here?"
:Jester King Emeric: "Perhaps you should visit the Wood Elves next time."
:Jester King Jorunn: "This one would, but he cannot fit through their doors."

:Jester King Emeric: "Tell me, Jorunn. How many Imperials does it take to crown an Emperor?"
:Jester King Jorunn: "This one does not do counting, only wordiness."
:Jester King Emeric: "No one knows! They can't keep one alive long enough to get through the ceremony!"
:Jester King Jorunn: "Oh! Ho! Yes, they do die at an alarmed rate!"

:Jester King Jorunn: "Ah! This place is nice! Why has Jorunn not invaded it before?"
:Jester King Emeric: "Because you're the only Nord fat enough to float here?"
:Jester King Jorunn: "Jorunn did not swim to Vulkhel Guard, though he is drenched. This place is too hot for clothing."
:Jester King Emeric: "No! Don't you dare strip naked!"
:Jester King Jorunn: "Jorunn wishes to glisten in the warm breeze!"
: 
:Jester King Emeric: "My kingdom for a scroll of frost!"
 

Stonefalls
:Jester Queen Ayrenn: "Achoo!"
:Jester King Emeric: "I told you not to sniff the sneezing powder."
:Jester Queen Ayrenn: "Achoo! I—Achoo! I didn't! It's this dry air!"
:Jester King Emeric: "Ah, yes. I empathize. It's murder on the skin. Just look at me."
:Jester Queen Ayrenn: "Oh! You should get that looked at, you're practically a lizard!"

:Jester King Emeric: "I don't know if I can stomach anymore of that belching!"
:Jester Queen Ayrenn: "I think it's got a melodic quality. Besides, if we stopped it, Jorunn might explode!"
:Jester King Emeric: "Not him! Those wretched lava flows!"
:Jester Queen Ayrenn: "Oh? Why do those vex you?"
:Jester King Emeric: "Let's just say I don't think Ashlands is the most accurate moniker if you're accounting for smell."

:Jester King Emeric: "Do you know the trouble with Morrowind feasts?"
:Jester Queen Ayrenn: "All the poisonings?"
:Jester King Emeric: "No, besides that!"
:Jester Queen Ayrenn: "The squishy bug glop?"
:Jester King Emeric: "Yes, but—"
:Jester Queen Ayrenn: "The long silent glowering?"
:Jester King Emeric: "Everything comes out smoked …! But seriously, they really are dreadful, aren't they?"

:Jester King Emeric: "Ayrenn, do you know the difference between Nords and pigs?"
:Jester Queen Ayrenn: "Oh! No, I don't think I do."
:Jester King Emeric: "Pigs don't turn into Nords when they drink!"
: 
:Jester Queen Ayrenn: "I don't know that I've seen a pig drink."
:Jester King Emeric: "Bah, pearls before swine!"

:Jester King Emeric (Falsetto): "Emeric!"
:Jester King Emeric: "Oh no!"
:Jester King Emeric (Falsetto): "Emeric! Our quarters are full of bugs! Is this the respect your name command here?"
:Jester King Emeric: "Um, well, yes, my flower. You see, those were breakfast."
:Jester King Emeric (Falsetto): "You expect me to eat that! The nerve!"
:Jester King Emeric: "I … thought they were quite good …"''