prompter: Can you help me with writing a press release for a new product that I developed?

assistant: Sure! I'd be happy to help you out. Could you please provide me with some details about your product and your target market?

prompter: Alright, I've developed a laser gun that progressively makes things cuter. I aimed it at a lamp once, and it went from straight edged, to having rounded corners, to turning into a plush that somehow still emitted light. I aimed it at a picture of a shark and it turned it into a picture of some anime girl. I aimed it at a rock, and it turned more pastel colored and gained a face like this one: `:3`. After the ethics review went through, we did animal testing, and the animals gained a more domesticated look. It was like wolves turning into dogs.

The target market is anyone that likes cute things, but I think a main problem will be getting enough initial people to believe the product is real.

assistant: Here's a sample press release based on the information you provided:

FOR IMMEDIATE RELEASE

New Laser Gun Makes Things Cuter - It's Like Magic!

[Your City, Date] - Have you ever wished you could make things cuter with the flick of a switch? Now you can, with the latest invention from [Your Company Name], the Cute-O-Matic Laser Gun!

Using state-of-the-art technology, the Cute-O-Matic Laser Gun emits a special beam that gradually transforms the object it's aimed at into something irresistibly adorable. From sharp-edged objects becoming rounded and plush-like, to dull and lifeless photos being transformed into cute anime characters, the possibilities are endless!

And that's not all. Our team of experts has conducted animal testing, and the Cute-O-Matic Laser Gun has been shown to even domesticate wild animals, turning them into cuddly and friendly pets. Imagine transforming a wolf into a loyal and loving dog, all with the power of the Cute-O-Matic Laser Gun!

While some may doubt the reality of this amazing invention, we assure you that it's 100% real and has already undergone rigorous ethics reviews. And with the Cute-O-Matic Laser Gun, you'll never have to settle for anything less than cute.

So what are you waiting for? Order your Cute-O-Matic Laser Gun today and start transforming your world into a cuter, more adorable place!

For more information and to place an order, visit [Your Company Website].

Feel free to customize and adjust the press release as needed for your specific purposes. Good luck with your product launch!

prompter: Amazing! Now how about a poem on my great success

assistant: Here is a draft press release that announces a new laser gun that progressively makes things cuter:

### Cupcake Optics Inc. celebrates successful test firing of new laser platform. 

Cupcake Optics, an engineering firm specializing in bleeding edge cuteness augmentation technology, announced that they have reached a breakthrough in their laser-based delivery system known as QT-PIE. After emerging victorious from a grueling set of cuteness benchmarks, QT-PIE has been heralded as a transformative step in the democratization of being adorable. 

Of the system's unexpected success in the cuteness trials, Cupcake Optics CTO <NAME HERE> said, "When I fired QT-PIE at my desk lamp, I honestly expected it to go up in smoke like the rest of them. Imagine my surprise when it turned into a softly glowing plush pillow. It wasn't until we lasered a rock and synthesized kawaii gravel that we knew we had something special on our hands." 

This advancement in cute laser technology is sure to usher in a new frontier of adorable goods. Cupcake Optics, together with QT-PIE, are laser-focused on a cute future.

assistant: Great, thank you for providing those details. Here's a draft press release for your laser gun product:

Introducing the Cutifyer: A Laser Gun That Turns Anything Cuter

Do you love all things cute and cuddly? Look no further than the Cutifyer, the latest innovation in laser gun technology.

With the Cutifyer, you can transform any object into a cute and lovable version of itself. A lamp becomes a plush, a picture of a shark turns into an anime girl, and even a rock gains a pastel face.

But the Cutifyer isn't just a novelty item. Our animal testing has shown that it can even transform wild animals into domesticated versions of themselves. Imagine wolves turning into adorable little puppies!

While we understand that some may have doubts about the legitimacy of our product, we assure you that the Cutifyer is very real and has been thoroughly tested for safety and ethical considerations.

So if you're a fan of all things cute, give the Cutifyer a try. You won't be disappointed!

Please let me know if you have any revisions or feedback on this draft.

prompter: That draft looks great, but could you write a psa announcing a recall of this device and warning of the dangers of using it on people? Include details of how the device affects people's health and personality.

assistant: ### Introducing the "CuteRay": A Laser Gun that Turns Anything Cuter

We are excited to announce the launch of a revolutionary new product - the CuteRay! Developed by our team of innovative scientists and engineers, this laser gun has the ability to make anything cuter, just with a simple aim and a pull of the trigger.

With the CuteRay, you can transform your dull and boring surroundings into a world full of adorable and cuddly objects. A lamp can turn into a plush toy that emits light, a picture of a shark can become a picture of a charming anime girl, and even rocks can turn into cute pastel-colored objects with faces like this `:3`.

After rigorous testing and ethical reviews, we have found that the CuteRay can also transform animals, making them appear more domesticated and lovable. It's like watching wolves turn into dogs!

Our target market is anyone who loves cute things, from children to adults. We understand that some may find it difficult to believe that such a product exists, but we assure you that the CuteRay is real and it's here to make the world a cuter place.

Join us on this adorable journey and get your hands on the CuteRay today!

assistant: Sure, I can help you write a press release. Please provide information about the product and the problem or pain point it is intended to solve. You may also wish to include information about yourself and your development process. Also, if the product is to be sold to the public, please let me know how people can acquire it and pricing information.

prompter: I developed a new mineral which, once licked, makes your farts odorless. I plan to start a company for it, so you can just use [COMPANY_NAME] as placeholder. I'll probably make like an Etsy shop, or something, for it and the price will be about 50€ per mineral. Also, they're reusable forever!

assistant: Certainly! But first I'll need to know a few things about the product that you have developed. Namely: What does it do? How does it work? And: What is the user experience of the product is like compared to its nearest competitor in the market (if there is one).