Just Like Raising Your Own? Grandmothers Perceptions of Parenting a Second Time Around.

Abstract: A defining characteristic of grandparents raising grandchildren is parenting a second generation of children. To learn how grandmothers compare parenting their grandchildren to parenting their children, 40 custodial grandmothers were interviewed. Results of a qualitative analysis indicated that grandmothers perceived themselves as wiser, more relaxed, and more involved with their grandchildren. Grandmothers also perceived added challenges such as having limited energy, negotiating changing family roles, and parenting in a toxic social environment. In terms of parenting behaviors and emotional bonds, some grandmothers saw similarities in parenting their children and grandchildren. Findings suggest that custodial grandmothers would benefit from parent education and training that takes into account their previous parenting experience yet still addresses the unique challenges associated with parenting grandchildren. Key Words: family gerontology, grandparents, grandparents raising grandchildren, intergenerational parenting, kinship care. Increasingly, grandparents are assuming parenting responsibilities for their grandchildren. In the past 30 years, the number of American children being cared for by a grandparent has more than doubled to 4.5 million, representing 6.3% of all U.S. children (Bryson, 2001). Grandparent caregivers now number around 2.4 million, constituting 1.5% of the caregiving population over the age of 30 (Simmons & Dye, 2003). Grandparents typically assume parenting responsibilities because of problems associated with their grandchildren's parents. These problems include parental substance abuse, abuse and neglect, incarceration, HIV/AIDS, mental illness, divorce, and death (Jendrek, 1994; Pinson-Millburn, Fabian, Schlossberg, & Pyle, 1996; Shore & Hayslip, 1994). When grandparents assume caregiving responsibilities, they frequently inherit significant parenting challenges. Grandchildren may experience depression, anxiety, health problems, behavior problems, academic difficulties, aggression, and feelings of anger, rejection, and guilt (Billing, Ehrle, & Kortenkamp, 2002; Shore & Hayslip, 1994; Solomon & Marx, 1995). Although parenting a child with emotional and behavioral problems would be challenging for any caregiver, parenting may be especially difficult for grandparents because of additional stressors associated with the role. These stressors include legal and financial problems, insufficient knowledge about child development and current parenting strategies, difficulties with their adult children, feelings of grief, social isolation, health concerns, and psychological distress (Jendrek, 1993; Minkler & Fuller-Thomson, 1999; Pinson-Millburn et al., 1996). In spite of the vast body of research demonstrating the negative impact of assuming caregiving responsibilities on grandparents' physical and mental health, the ways in which grandparent caregivers parent their grandchildren have received little empirical attention. Moreover, the limited research that has addressed grandparents' parenting has not emphasized the fact that grandparent caregivers have parented before and bring previous experiences, successes, and failures to parenting for a second time. To further understanding of how grandparents experience parenting within their broader historical and social context, this research explored how grandmothers perceive parenting their grandchildren to be the same as and different from parenting their own children. In uncovering similarities and differences in parenting children versus grandchildren, the results of this study provide insightful information to inform the development of interventions that address grandmothers' unique parenting needs. Grandparents as Parents Because of changes in family structures and the larger sociocultural environment, grandparenting in the United States has undergone a transformation (Kornhaber, 1996). …