Communication Technology and Postdivorce Coparenting

Divorced individuals who share parenting responsibilities have to figure out ways to work together to raise their children. The purpose of this qualitative study of 49 divorced coparents was to examine how they used technology (e.g., cell phones, computers) to communicate. For parents in effective coparenting relationships, communication technologies made it easier for them to plan and make conjoint decisions about their children while living apart. Communication technology, however, did not necessarily make coparenting easier if parents were contentious. Contentious parents used communication technologies as tools to (a) reduce conflicts, (b) withhold information, (c) limit the ability of the coparent to have input into childrearing decisions, and (d) try to influence the behavior of the coparent.Key Words: communication, coparenting, divorce. technologyOver one million U.S. children experience the divorce of their parents annually (Kreider, 2007). In 2007, 25.8% of American children younger than 1 8 lived with a single parent, and 6% lived with a parent and a stepparent. An estimated 16.8% of divorced men and 56.9% of divorced women live with their own minor children (Kreider, 2007). These children and their divorced parents face many challenges. One of the most important challenges in postdivorce families is maintaining positive coparental relationships (Miller, 2009; Whiteside, 1998). In the early 1990s 20% of divorced parents had joint legal custody; this figure increased to an estimated 50% -90% when state statutes changed to permit joint legal custody (Kelly, 2007). Joint physical custody has lagged behind legal custody, but by 2010, 47 states had statutes authorizing joint legal and physical custody if it was in the child's best interest (EIrod & Spector, 2011). Increasingly, parents are choosing, or courts are mandating, shared parenting after divorce (Bauserman, 2002), requiring communication between ex-partners who may have contentious relationships. Divorced individuals who share parenting responsibilities have to determine ways to work together to raise their children (Ahrons, 2007; Graham, 2003). Being able to develop or maintain a positive coparental relationship is critical because the quality of the coparental relationship is related to children's adjustment following divorce: Children are harmed when parents try to undermine each other, argue frequently about the children, and put the children in the middle of parental disputes (Buchanan, Maccoby, & Dornbusch, 1 996; Sandler, Miles, Cookston, & Braver, 2008). Coparental relationships also are related to the quality of postdivorce parent-child relationships (Amato & Sobolewski, 2004) and are particularly relevant to the bonds between children and nonresidential parents, usually fathers (Sobolewski & King, 2005). Maintaining close relationships with nonresidential fathers has been found in several studies to be predictive of children's well-being and adjustment to divorce (Amato & Gilbreth, 1999; Carlson, 2006; King & Sobolewski, 2006). In fact, the evidence has been so compelling that some researchers have turned their attention to factors that facilitate or hinder divorced parents' connections with their children and each other. One factor that has been identified is communication (Afifi & MeManus, 2006; Graham, 2003). Although communication allows family members to maintain relationships, it can either ameliorate or increase conflict (Graham, 1997; Miller, 2009). That is, if the communication between parents is mostly negative, accusatory, or hostile, then children suffer. Markham and Coleman (in press) noted that divorced coparenting mothers who identified their coparenting relationships as contentious limited direct communication (i.e., in person, phone) and used only e-mail and texting in order to avoid strife. Those who had better relationships used a variety of means of communicating, including technology. …