You'll wish your TV went Dark, Thirty minutes into the movie

Rating: 2/10 (28 November 2017)

I'll make this quick so you can read all the other reviews rightfully slamming this movie. Zero Dark Thirty is a glossy, oversimplified, distinctly Hollywood re-telling of the CIA's version of how the Osama Bin Laden hunt went down.
Every character on the roster can be described in 2 words: tough guy.
I imagine the casting department had fun auditioning all the potential actors. "Can you read that scene again but without a hint of a soul? Also say your lines as if you're trying to impress your high school prom date. You know, be a tough guy!" (Even the women)
If you can see where this is going, congratulations, you have a brain and will probably dislike this movie. Zero Dark Thirty attempts to glorify everything the USA did, and it does this by portraying the CIA as a tough guy, too-cool-for-school gang of superheros. Torture, "accidentally" killing civilians and general ignoble behavior is glorified because, tough guys are always right, and they get the job done. Because they're cool.
If you've seen "The Spy Who Came In from the Cold", an excellent EXCELLENT espionnage thriller about how the USA obtained intelligence during the Cold War and the repercussions thereof, then I can explain Zero Dark Thirty in one sentence: it everything that "The Spy" was not.
The whole movie seemed like all the rejects from Predator and all the rejects from Aliens decided to have a tough off. And the winner was... definitely not the audience.