X-Kids

Rating: Null/10 (1 May 2003)

I can't believe all the positive, and in some cases orgasmic, reviews appearing for X-Men 2 here on IMDb.com. Are people unable to see, hear and differentiate quality in movies. Are moviegoers so sated by dazzling special effects and fast-edited fight scenes that their movie appetite is fully satisfied. Do people not see the quality difference between say, in descending order, LOTRings, Harry Potter and X-Men - the directing, cinematography, acting, characterisation, effects and especially the quality of the script.
The original X-Men had the saving grace of two wonderful performances by Hugh Jackman and Anna Paquin as Wolverine and Rogue. Their developing relationship as they both discovered their powers was some of the best written screenplay of any comic book movie. This overshadowed and made up for everything else - the tiny $50m budget and disappointing finale especially. And so what happens in X-Men 2 ?
Characters and script are both thrown out of the window and the film descends into 2 and 1/4 hours of mediocrity. Too short scenes. Scenes that just fizzle out. Muddled editing. Badly chopped and changing story lines. Throw thirty new characters on the screen and hope no-one notices not one of them has anything worthwhile to say. Anodyne lines spew forth from character after character. In over 130 minutes of dialogue, there is not one memorable line in the entire movie ! And the scene where Pyro tells his parents of his powers was one of the worst written and acted scenes I have ever seen in a Hollywood production - was this improvisation ? I understand the parents were shocked and didn't know what to say, but there are way of doing this so we find it touching and feel for the family - this was amateur hour. Shocking. I was embarrassed for the actors.
Wolverine was reduced to unfunny one-liners, showing off his biceps and beating up the baddies. Halle Berry's Storm looked like she wanted to burst into tears at the dialogue she was surely forced at knifepoint to utter. These writers should be proscecuted to the full extent of the law so they can never again write, type or dictate their screenplay drivel for any other movie.
I love comic book and fantasy movies, but the only mutant power X-Men 2 seems to possess is the ability to create the illusion of apparent quality for the raving multitude of popcorn eating teenagers. Maybe the subtitled version has better jokes ?