X-cruciating

Rating: 1/10 (4 June 2011)

I made the mistake of getting this on DVD, which haunts me. That said - reader, I beg you: trust me. This is soulless hack work, as only a talentless twit like Brett Ratner could produce. That I knew and loved the books is beside the point; I can appreciate that a film must take liberties. I can appreciate as well that Bryan Singer, a few flaws notwithstanding, knew how to find the heart in these tales. It is ironic that a horror from the first two movies - Berry's utterly absurd portrayal of storm - is here nearly a nostalgic comfort. Because all of this is a mess. We are expected to believe lots of things far more unreal than mutant abilities, such as Magneto turning his back on Mystique because the 'cure' reverts her to human form. OUT OF CHARACTER, and rather stupid for the brilliant Erik, who knew the lady's resourcefulness. Or Magneto idiotically egging on the deranged Phoenix as though he had no idea of what she could do, as he and Charles visit Jean. Or Jean's mad impulse to turn Scott to dust, when, in movie and books, her love for Scott saves her from Phoenix insanity. Or that Wolverine's healing power is just so bad-ass, it enables him to near the galactic killing force Jean becomes (and no nonsense about her 'letting' this happen, please- the character is a zombie). Or - oh, hell, it's everywhere and everything. Worst of all, though, is the lifelessness of it. A few actors try, but can't get past the dead atmosphere. On the plus side, the girl playing Kitty looks right, and you have to love Multiple Man who has, I think, one line, when Magneto (whom he does not know) recruits him: "Sounds good to me!" That's it for the plus side.