I feel unclean. 'X3' = frown. (Some spoilers within)

Rating: 1/10 (4 June 2006)

From this day forward, I hold a personal grudge against Brett Ratner.
Let me say first that as a whole - the film is too rushed; characters are too clichéd, having been transformed from incarnations in previous films to meet the lower standards of a pure action flick.
Let me say second that I did, as a whole, find the movie entertaining. Special effects and some some action sequences were well done. Also, even if the characterizations were screwed up (e.g. Wolverine's changed personality as suggested above, or just the very fact that half the X-Men are now KIDS despite them being among THE VERY FIRST X-MEN IN THE ENTIRE SERIES), I enjoyed the way that the screenwriters went about displaying some of the powers of the various mutants, including:
***Possible (but not really) spoilers if you haven't seen the movie*** -The first time we see Angel spread his wings (not the rest of the scene, just that moment) -Shadowcat and Juggernaut racing to reach Leech (especially the classic one-liner from Juggernaut...) -Beast's acrobatics during the Alcatraz fight -The fastball special in the Danger Room ***End possible (but not really) spoilers***
But the list of what I most truly enjoyed about the movie ends there. I spent half the film cursing Ratner for what he has done with the series; if this film were in more capable hands (i.e. Bryan Singer, if no one else), it could have topped even 'X2.' But no - this is an action movie, plain and simple. There are a few scenes here and there where the writers were obviously going for a more emotional atmosphere, but it never really reached fruition (partly their fault, partly the fault of the score's composer, with whose work I am not particularly impressed). In the end, what we're left with is an action flick with an overzealous use of special effects. Phoenix, I'm looking at you.
Speaking of overzealous, how about the nonchalant disposal of most of the mutants in the film? Arclight, Quill? ********MASSIVE INCREDIBLE SPOILERS IN BETWEEN THESE ASTERISKS********Mystique? Cyclops? MAGNETO? (At least his had a purpose and a meaning, but that's not saying much.)********END MASSIVE INCREDIBLE SPOILERS********
Also, awful dialogue. While what I really want to know is why anyone thought it was a good idea to have Shadowcat call Juggernaut a "dickhead," the best example I can give is the scene where Cyclops first sees Phoenix for the first time:
Scott: "Jean?" Jean: "Scott?" Scott: "How?!" Jean: "I don't know!"
And another thing: the ending is TERRIBLE. Just plain TERRIBLE. I can't think of any words with which to properly describe it aside from TERRIBLE. True, the ten second scene at the end of the credits makes things better - in fact, I dare say that this ten second scene, which references a very minor and brief piece of dialogue earlier in the film, is the best scene in the movie, which, for it being at most ten seconds long, says an awful lot about the rest of the film. But it doesn't make things better enough. In fact, I'm half of the mind that this ending is just as terrible as the rest of the movie, and by virtue of its relative quality makes all scenes prior that much more inferior, so now the secret ending is at a lower level of superiority, and the rest of the movie is even worse, lowering the secret ending to a greater depth of "superiority"...... And on it goes until you have the worst movie of the summer. Possibly of the year. Possibly... ever.
I feel like I need to shower, despite having done so before I even left.
Terrible movie.
What makes it even worse is that the various components of the film's story - the Dark Phoenix Saga, and the mutant cure that is a part of Joss Whedon's current, celebrated run with "Astonishing X-Men" - are, in their respective source material, bloody great story lines. And look what's been done with them now.
Excuse me while I go play with my action figures and imagine a better story than that which Ratner gave us with a multi-million dollar budget.