X-Men and An Extra Slice of Cheese

Rating: 4/10 (29 April 2012)

This is not a good film but let's start with the plot. Set during the Cold War, a mutant named Shaw (that rhymed :) ) is attempting to start a nuclear war between America and Russia in order to wipe out all humans and leave the remaining mutants to live amongst the cockroaches. I'm not entirely sure how Shaw expects the mutants to eat, drink and live on an ashen bum hole of a planet but I digress. Cue the X-Men and perhaps one of the cheesiest films to ever get a high grade on IMDb.
The dialogue is, in a word, cheesy. With actors doing the best with what they have, for the most part. Michael Fassbender's fantastic interpretation of an Irish Magneto really is distracting as you try to work out at what point the German Jew picked up his Gaelic lilt. It's okay though as Fassbender lets it go from time to time just to play with our minds.
As mutants go there is a decent array of unique mutants that at least makes a change from the three films that preceded it. Though I felt some were a little weak and, well, looked a little silly. Banshee in particular seemed able to crack glass but in a fight situation relied on flying away from danger. Look out for the first time Banshee learns to fly and the appalling CGI employed. On the whole they all felt a little weak with the exception of Beast and Havoc. Even here, these mutants feel under used. Accepting that they are merely learning their powers and very young I expected them to be used more, for fighting yes, or learning about their characters, the film does neither.
There is little in the way of character depth here with only Magneto really been a fully realised character. I don't think the actors can be blamed here. Without spoiling anything, look out for Mystique/Raven's fantastic heart wrenching (sarcasm) scene when she must decide between A MAN SHE HAS SPENT HER ENTIRE LIFE WITH AND WHO COULD BE DYING and another guy who just tried to kill everyone.
The film also contains a training montage...need I say more? With a plot that makes you go, "He's planning what..?", dialogue that makes you cringe and underutilized mutants, X-men first class is disappointing.