Sadly, an unimaginative bore.

Rating: Null/10 (1 May 2009)

"X-Men Origins: Wolverine" is an unimaginative bore with no moral to its story, not even a pretentious one. The movie's only redeeming value is Hugh Jackman who somehow manages not to fall over in pain when hit with uninspired lines ("No one kills you but me!") or having to say them himself.
The characters' motivations are clichéd (or archaic, if that suits you better - but neither works with unoriginal dialogue), if you learn of them at all. The movie goes for a slick look and aptly combines that with lots of violence and usually the intention of these means is to make something look sophisticated - which does not work when one has seen all the script's scenes done better in other stories before.
Lots of things are left unexplained (Logan and Victor's immortality, Logan's other mutant skills, when he stopped going by his given name and adopted Logan in the first place, how long the film's world has known of mutants), unexplained and potentially illogical (why this or that hurts or kills someone (or doesn't, for that matter)), or simply utterly un-called for (the infantile boxing match scene).
You'd also question the characters' intelligence at times: Logan apparently never bothered to ask what exactly his make-over halfway through the movie entailed and how this one secret facility could exist for years with hardly any guards and someone so dumb in charge you're left to wonder (memo: don't create an indestructible weapon if you have no means to control it).
Finally, there's this whole theme about Logan quarreling with the idea that he's a brutal animal, only his complex makes no sense when the first minutes of the movie established him as nothing but a soldier who looked awfully pained at his brother's bloodlust and tried to stop it.
I would like to say something conciliatory, though: Hugh Jackman. Butt naked.