They're not so scary if you think of them as "vempiyehs"

Rating: 5/10 (2 November 2015)

And if, like me, you think that Jemaine Clement's slightly simian features and native Kiwi ic-cent are already funny enough, you may not be happy with the paste-on facial hair and faux-Transylvanian snarl that he puts on for this one. This 83' quasi-improvised mockumentary has pretty much the same cheesy flavor as one of the videos from a "Flight of the Conchords" episode, though it lacks the sweetness and wit (and Brett!) of the show itself.
On the plus side, co-w/d Taika Waititi has kind of an Andy Kaufman vibe going on, and the opening scenes have a sprinkling of pretty good deadpan gags—the "fletmites" have a house meeting to discuss why nobody's done the dishes for five years; primping in the mirror before a night of clubbing is clearly not an option, but various workarounds are available
I can't speak for the rest—after a long sequence of mirthless hummina-hummina improv (7,000-year-old Petyr turns a new guy who doesn't seem to be working out), I felt like I'd seen all that Vladislav, Viago, Deacon and Petyr had to offer. Jaded film critics who've seen too many "serious" vampire movies (I'm talking about you, Anthony Lane of The New Yorker!) seem to have gone way overboard for this one.
****.5, bumped up to ***** for the tacky "archival" graphics; looks like they went with the first hits they got on Google Images every time.