Another garbage comic book movie

Rating: 2/10 (19 January 2010)

Some notes to the makers of the next Watchmen (and at 100mil+ total box, there will be another one):
a) Have an actual story to tell next time. Blue Guy Saves the World is something a 6th grader comes up with.
b) Turn the FREAKING SOUND EFFECTS down. There is no way to watch this without using the volume control every 2mins.
c) The music sucks. I don't care if it's 1985 since everything looks like 2009 anyway, so use some songs from modern bands. Seriously, Dylan, Hendrix. That's grandpa music. Or re-use the rest of the Koyaanisqatsi soundtrack like you did for Origin of Blue Man. That part was good.
d) Bring the hotness. Transformers had Megan Fox. Who did you have? Malin Akerman. Snort.
e) I don't care if you follow the stupid book or not. It's a graphic novel, not a collection of storyboards. Don't go all Fantastic Bore on us, but use the source material as a starting point, not an ending point.
f) Don't ever show me the origin of a superhero again. Maybe in the 60s they cared about that cr*ap. Not now
g) Get rid of the Tarantinesque violence, and the recycled 'fu. It was funny in Pulp Fiction and The Matrix. Those movies were made a long time ago.
h) Is it possible to make a comic book movie that doesn't have a half dozen big "boardroom" scenes? They all look phony. Worse than indie films. Yeah, that bad.
Watchmen may have had unique characters, blah-blah, but the story was the same boring hash we've been fed a dozen times before and everything down to the costumes is retreaded. The focus is all over the place. Choose *one* character (Rorsach, duh) and stay with him. Ditch the cliché "save the world" plot line. Then you might have something like Watchmen II: A Comic Book Movie Worth Watching!
RstJ