Oh ... dear gods ... no. Just no!

Rating: 1/10 (12 December 2017)

In 2000, someone had the "fantastic" idea of creating a "Dungeons and Dragons" movie.
It was a travesty. Such a travesty, in fact, that no one has spoken of making anything similar since. It got close to destroying the career of Jeremy Irons and every other "actor" and "actress" involved in that steaming pile of bovine fecal matter has been forever tarnished by their association therewith, and have failed to make it in Hollywood.
And then came Warcraft.
A worthy successor in terms of sheer, utter awfulness. Ten minutes in, I was laughing at how bad it was. IF I had paid money in the cinema to see this talentless piece of unspeakable awfulness, I would have walked out and re-considered paying for movie-tickets for a while. I'd have felt -robbed-.
The acting is hammy, non-existent or just plain bad. The sets are ridiculously awful, to the point of people riding past green-screen so poorly executed that you can SEE where the plastic and cardboard trees stop and the green-screen begins. Close-ups of armour reveals that it seems to be painted by a blindfolded four-year-old. The King's helmet is so poorly fitting he can barely look out of it, and it tends to -not- -turn- when he turns his head inside it. The fight scenes are just plain dreadful, with anyone NOT CGI, having had obvious trouble with where to hit the markers that the orks would later replace, to the point of not following through on their attacks or flailing aimlessly in the air.
Medivh is criminal in his ridiculousness.
Look ... Warcraft is a series of games that never took itself particularly seriously. The jokes were plentiful ... anyone who played them probably had fun multi-clicking on any unit on the map to eventually have them flip out and badmouth you for bothering them. The sheer, unadulterated silliness of it all permeats the games.
But the movie has none of it. It tries to take itself seriously and fails -miserably- on every -single- count. Within the first fifteen minutes, you have to be able to tell just under twenty -named- characters apart and make sense of their motivations and place within the story.
The only character which comes close to believability for fans of the games, is Gul'dan, who is as vicious and nasty as one could hope for. Except of course, when he delivers a stillborn baby and promptly saves its life. Oh ... oops. Or his voice. Good heavens, his -voice-. Weedy little sniveling git that they made him. He could have been an overgrown goblin, instead of having the raspy, horrid inflection he did in the games.
Please, whatever you do, do not waste part of your life watching this movie.
Go watch paint dry. Or listen to German schlÃ¤ger music. Try stacking coins to a record height.
ANYTHING ... just -anything- ... but watching this unholy travesty, this -waste- of film-equipment and this death-knell of acting careers. Or so we can hope ... if there is -any- justice in the world.
The ... single ... worst ... movie ... I ... have ... ever ... seen.
Ed Wood was Academy Awared material compared to this drivel.