Worst movie of the year so far. Herbie was better

Rating: 1/10 (1 July 2005)

This had to be one of the most GOD AWFUL PIECES OF CRAP I HAVE EVER SEEN! Let's go down the laundry list:
-"We're under attack! Is it the terrorists?!" - Trite, semi-political bull. You could hear a collective slapping noise as the audience smacked themselves in the head.
-Robbie - Okay, so the world's under attack, imminent death, and he wants to air out frustrations about his relationship with his father? And then he somehow mysteriously survives after running into a firewall of tripods? (BTW that ruins nothing. Anybody who sees a Spielberg movie knows he goes for the happy ending these days, even if it doesn't make sense).
-Dakota Fanning - Worst Child Star. EVER! My ears were bleeding. "I'm going to say something semi-philosophical, even though I'm 10 years old." "Now I'm gonna scream like an idiot." "Now I'm gonna stare blankly like that dead chick from the 'Poltergeist' movies."
-If the Martians planted the tripods a million years ago, before man evolved, and they so coveted our planet, why didn't they just stay? Did they want us to fix the place up for them? How can you come down, plant something, go back to your crappy planet, and stew for a million years?
-The Martians die of an allergy to our air and blood. Fine, good, that's straight from the book. But how does a food allergy (hence the peanut butter joke at the beginning) cause the aliens to drop their shields on the tripods so that the military can blow them up? Food allergy, not "Independence Day"-style computer virus.
-Why do the aliens look like the aliens from "Independence Day?"
-If the tripods vaporize people, how come their clothes survive the blast?
-Was there ANY point to Morgan Freeman's narration at the beginning and end?
There were a few positives, however:
-Tim Robbins - Great as a modern day representation of Ogilvy, the crazy guy from the book that dies (again, not really a spoiler. What crazy guy in any sci-fi movie lives?).
-Special Effects - There's a nice confusion aspect, though the camera shaking could have been toned down a bit. The CGI was cheesy at best, but the ground effects and stunt work was pretty decent.
-I'll admit I laughed twice, at the train, and when Tom Cruise sings "Little Duece Coupe."
But those can't make up for the sheer torture this movie was. Another H.G. Wells novel is ruined by a cheesy update/remake (Time Machine, anyone?). This is easily the worst movie of the year so far.
Final note: If Tom Cruise doesn't believe in psychiatry, then why does his character placate his daughter's claustrophobia?