Unbearably awful

Rating: 2/10 (23 July 2006)

I resisted seeing this movie in the theatres because i have been so turned off by Tom Cruise the last few years. It was on HBO last night so I figured, "What the hey..." I can't believe how terrible it was on so many levels. First and foremost- the screenplay was inadequate and sloppy. How many pages must have looked something like "EXPLOSION. People scream. Cut to: EXLOSION. People scream. Cut to: LASERS SHOOT. People are vaporized. Cut to: EXPLOSION." The lead character is unlikable as a protagonist and borderline abusive as a father. The obvious parallels to 9/11 are clunky ("Is it terrorists? Is it terrorists?")and, even worse, not fully realized. The film wants to have it both ways- having Ray's son swept up in patriotic fervor to defend his country and yet still deliver him safe and sound at the end. I'm sorry, but too many of our troops have been killed in the last five years to cop out with such a turn of events. Either you sacrifice the son to make a point or you don't broach the topic. The acting was grating and amateurish. Cruise starts off with his typical cocky Maverick ripoff that he's been riding into the ground for close to twenty years and then turns "actor" by welling up with tears and yelling his children's names over and over. Dakota Fanning's lungs are impressive. But there's nothing behind it. How chilling was Haley Joel Osment in "Sixth Sense" when he was so desperate to erase the horrific images he was seeing? To be "normal" again? Dakota just screams over and over and over and over. The pacing was so sluggish, even amid all of the explosions. If I didn't have a clock in my cable box I would have sworn this movie is four and a half hours long, even though it comes in at only 116 minutes. And then the climax is the machines inexplicably start falling apart and the movie's suddenly over, with narration explaining that common germs killed them. WOW. So much for man vanquishing his foes by coming together as one or doing something heroic or clever, or even gosh-darn LUCKY. What was the point of this movie? And it grossed $200 million (half of which went to Tom Cruise?!!!) I just don't get it. I really don't.