Spider-Man uses magical ring to escape from matrix

Rating: 4/10 (18 September 2008)

Read "Wesley" for "Spider-Man", "bullet" for "ring", and "fraternity" for "matrix", and you've got "Wanted". Angelina Jolie has become a pretty reliable indicator of crap me-too movies, much the way a black cat denotes bad luck. Think "Beowulf", "Mr. & Mrs. Smith", or "Alexander". This one is no different. I mean, of course she looks hot with her big hair and pushed-up boobs and tight outfits, but that's because half the budget was spent on hair and make-up. The other half went to special effects and extras. As a result, both Angelina and Chicago look more dramatic than ever. But what's next in a movie that opens with a showdown? Blood, sweat, and tears mostly, especially for Wesley Gibson, a hapless nobody who discovers he has superpowers and gets entangled in a global (counter-)conspiracy of epic proportions. Sort of like Peter Parker. Or Frodo. Or Neo. And he doesn't even get the girl. Think "Charmed" minus the witches plus a lot of pointless violence and even more pompous sermonizing, especially by Morgan Freeman's character Sloan. Visually impressive though. Some sets, like the fraternity's library, look familiar. From "The League of Extraordinary Gentlement" perhaps? The best part is the frighteningly realistic portrayal of cubicle hell in the movie's first half hour.