What a piece of bullshit!

Rating: 1/10 (26 July 2008)

This movie was utterly embarrassing - me and my friends decided never to let it be known that we ever watched the movie, and to disown it. I mean come on - some loom giving out names of people to be killed? Action sequences made Speed Racer look realistic in comparison! The movie was as pointless as it was stupid. Some monks while weaving discovered a binary code in the loom. How do the zeros/ones correspond to letters? Was it ASCII? Did it upgrade to Unicode due to the recent globalization? If you've seen the Mahabharat and Ramayan TV series of the mid-'80's in India, you will remember those sequences where heroes would fire arrows that hit each other squarely at the tip and are neutralised. This movie does the same with bullets - people neutralising each other's bullets by firing a counter-bullet to intercept it. The Jedi, Sith, and Neo seem lame and boring in comparison to the skills of the "Fraternity of Assassins following the whims of a loom that communicates using a binary textual encoding." As if that's not enough, bullets don't seem to have inertia and seem to break Newton's laws (or maybe bullets bend space or whatever). Curving bullets around objects may have made it a lame action-movie, but a bullet travelling in a circular trajectory just makes the movie a great comedy.