could have done better

Rating: 1/10 (25 August 2008)

I think this movie is like one of those shrimp flavored chips they sell in Asian food markets. Tasty but lacking in substance.
First some good points. I was watching this with a European traveler friend who identified a lot of the background as actually being of Spain as opposed to being budget filmed in Canada. The cinematography is excellent and did I mention 3 of the hottest women of our era? For fans of Woody Allen movies, this is nothing new. Scarlett Johansson who appeared in Matchpoint a couple years ago reprises her role as the third wheel in relationships. Perhaps I've been jaded by too many Woody flicks, but it seems the whole debacle of adultery and dissatisfaction with one's lot becomes a bit repetitive. I'm walking into the movie knowing full well that there is only one twist--what happens at the end.
Of course, this movie's also boasts that are 3 lovely women involved and one guy becomes the lucky stiff, but the triangle/quadrilateral never quite materializes because there is no real tension between Cristina and Vicky. Penelope Cruz was a standout in playing a neurotic psycho ex-gf but other than a titillating threesome, fails to inject any real conflict into the relationship.
This brings to mind another failing of the movie which I'm sure most males would agree with-- three lovely women. Come on Woody, is the best you can do a PG-13 movie? Seriously with all the infidelity and lust and sexual innuendos, is it asking too much for some boobies? I'm not a thirteen year old who's never seen naughty parts (and certainly if I needed to I'd watch Bikini Surfboard Vampires) but it detracts from the immersion--in this case escapism-- of the the movie when you're trying to imagine that a shaky closeup is tantamount to a passionate love-fest.
At the same time in the other direction, this movie doesn't leave much to the imagination. Unlike other Woody films, I don't know why this one necessitates a narrator. In Annie Hall, we get some interesting voice-over insights but this narrator seems shallow and patronizing--telling the audience such obvious trivialities as "they(Vicky and male interest) had a good time" after showing them having a sight-seeing session together. As far as I'm concerned, the only time to break the "show and don't tell" rule is if you're doing a documentary.
It's a shame that Allen has painted himself into a corner of such niche films because he certainly could do better.