Ho-hum, and some more

Rating: 1/10 (7 May 2004)

Written and directed by Stephen Sommers (known for movies such as `The Mummy' and its successful sequel) one would expect `Van Helsing' to run along similar lines as its predecessors. Unfortunately, this next installment in the Sommers Saga, somehow does not live up to standards set by the previous hits. The main characters in the film appeared to be one-dimensional adaptations made for the popcorn/ bubblegum audiences that Hollywood counts on for Box Office success. Whilst this formula seemed to work on `the Mummy', there is something missing of the '6 parts Action, 4 parts Comedy, 3 parts Horror and 1 part Romance' recipe of preceding attempts.
Dracula was portrayed as a garish, over-the-top revision of a character whose infamy had once made him one of the more feared creatures of literature. Here, he felt to me simply as a cartoon version of the real nature of what many of us will recognize. His Brides on the other hand were irritating - I'd always come to think them as being frightening, yet seductive beings, being the underworlds representation of sirens. Here they are bad actresses disguised (poorly) by computer generated images, worse dialogue, and terrible accents.
That being said, the title character himself was quite delightful to watch. Van Helsing's comedic talent, cavalier attitude and general Byron-esque heroic tendencies did leave this audience member rather pleased. However, due to Jackman's earlier movie choices in X-men and X-men 2, the similarities in Van Helsing and Wolverine were of course made - no spoilers will be revealed here, suffice to say that the drums of imminent misfortune play faintly in the background.
His love interest, played by the stunning Kate Beckinsale, is simply that - a love interest played by a captivating i-am-so-ballsy-stay-out-of-my-way sidekick. A woman, who one might add, doesn't wear very appropriate clothing for wintry conditions. There's comedic relief, in the form of Van Helsing's Little Helper (a.k.a. Carl - played by the talented David Wenham!) who I must admit got a few laughs out of me. Other peripheral characters were much the same, that is, they were the stereotyped clichés that we are all accustomed to seeing. The addition of further literary legends was a little absurd - Dr Jekyll/ Mr. Hyde for example? Why is he involved here? Confusion abounds.
All things considered, the film was relatively enjoyable, if by enjoyable you mean a night out where judgment and any reliable thought process must be left at the bathroom sink. It delivered large doses of action and broad comedy followed closely by a few startled gasps (ok, maybe not a few). After all, what more can you expect? This is Hollywood, where the men are men, and dollar signs rule their world.
Rating: 3/5