". . . full of sound and fury, signifying nothing."

Rating: 1/10 (15 June 2004)

This is an atrocious movie. It constitutes one of only three films I've ever actually wanted to walk out of despite having paid theater rates (I've only ever walked out of one). _Van_Helsing_ possesses no plot or character development other than tired and overly used clichés. The only redeeming and creative effort I can discern occurs in the presentation of the end credits. Vast amounts of stimuli shouldn't be boring, but it's clearly possible.
This movie makes _Underworld_ (also starring Beckinsale) look like a work of genius, and _X2_ (also starring Jackman) seem like a well thought out effort.