What the Helsing?

Rating: 7/10 (14 October 2004)

Van Helsing, the arch-nemesis of Dracula, is reincarnated in this sloppy movie as a Victorian James Bond whose job is to be an all-purpose monster killer for the Vatican. Sounds bad? It's worse than that.
As bad an idea as this is, it is poorly executed, with dreadful dialogue, underdeveloped characters, and computer generated monsters that are scary...not!
The story is heavy on action, but since we don't really care about the characters, the villains are camp rather than menacing, and the suspense (it there is any) is constantly undermined by hamfisted attempts at humour (not funny) none of it counts for much. Which just about sums up the film.