Werewolves, vampires and lots of monsters.... Yep it's a B-movie

Rating: 2/10 (24 October 2004)

First of all, I don't write many reviews. I only do the best movies...or the worst, So give me a break, it is just my point of view.
Hugh Jackman is Van Helsing, a badass dude who travels around the globe to kill everything that has to do with evil. He has been sent to transylvania to kill Dracula that has been tormenting the country for centuries. Of course, things become complicated when he has to handle werewolves and a 500 pound Frankenstein.
Owkay, this movie IS the badest movie of 2004. There is nothing good to say about Van Helsing. Bad sfx, lousy acting, and a plot that even the biggest moron would figure out.
When you hear that Stephen Sommers is the director you always have to be very careful. We know that he likes to make popcorn movies like the mummy 1 and 2 and deep rising. So after the ridiculous mummy returns you should have been warned. Van Helsing is like a bad roller-coaster trip that lasts for two hours and when you finally get off you have the feeling that you wanna throw up.
As for the special effects? My god, they are absolutely horrible. When Dracula's brides fly off, or when a man turns into a werewolf or even Mr. Hyde, you feel that there is something missing. They actually spend 160 million dollars and they didn't have decent sfx. What a waste.
And how about the acting? Well there is not much to say about that either. It's completely rubbish and you will never believe that Kate Beckinsale is a roemanian (xcuse me for the spelling) gipsie. "He is the firrrrst one to kill a vampirrre overrr a hunderrred yearrr, I say let's buy him a drrrink". Yeah, Swallow that! As for Richard Roxburgh and Hugh Jackman...Guys what were you thinking? Conversations turn to the worst and the one-liners are really laughable.
So now, you know. This is crap. Do not buy this movie, do not even rent this movie, do not watch it while you're drunk or stoned. Forget it, it will only be a waste of money.
My star rating: 1 out of 5
p.s. I didn't say anything about the plot c'ause there isn't any.