proves nothing can save a bad script

Rating: 3/10 (14 June 2004)

Either the original script for this film was awful, or the writing was mangled while in production or during the editing process, but in any case the final affect is the same: The story arch and dialogue is the equivalent to what a fifteen year old might come up with for a Dungeons and Dragons adventure. Don't get me wrong; I was fifteen, once, and still play D&D, but I expect a little more from movies. If a film doesn't provide a plot more complex than the flight of an arrow, or dialogue more realistic than a video game (except in the case of ExistenZ), it's most likely going to be a disappointment in my book (unless it matches the sheer primordial success of The Matrix). The plot is an interesting one, but it's criminal to have packed such a fine collection of classic monsters into a single plot that has been so hamfistedly presented.
Van Helsing is beautiful to look at. The art direction and effects are fantastic, and made me believe that this gothic fantasy land could actually have existed at one time. It gives the movie a style and beauty all its own, and if this were an arthouse film, that would be enough. However, there is supposed to be a story, here, and the telling of a story needs more than just a cool plot, and a nice looking presentation. Even the most extravagant and elegant airplane can't fly without adhering to the fundamental principles of aerodynamics.