Fool Me Once

Rating: 5/10 (19 March 2006)

I'm a regular guy. I like sports, beer, cars, scantily-clad women and action films. I'm young enough now to take all of these things very seriously, and old enough to know how silly that is. Nonetheless, it really steams my dumplings when I exchange any of my hard-earned money in an effort to attain of a few brief moments of preferably mindless entertainment and I'm left feeling hoodwinked. That being said, The Wachowski's V For Vendetta SEEMED, based on its thrilling trailer, like the perfect vehicle for an action film fan to enjoy another edgy and fantastically rendered foray into the world of graphic novels. With (in the trailer) all those sexy shots of slashing silver blades, mingled with just the right amount of futuristic ambiance, gun play, pyrotechnics and mysteriously masked villainy, what action film enthusiast wouldn't run to his computer and buy his tickets in advance? You... you can be the one.
To all you other Joe Schmoes: THIS IS NOT AN ACTION FILM. Though the story was compelling enough, I would have rather they packaged it as drama so that I might be pleasantly surprised by the very few and very brief incidences of action-relief. Try this, hold up your hand with only your little finger extended, no wiggle it three times. You've just outdone V on the action scale. My advice: save your money, stay home and wiggle your pinky until the DVD comes out... you'll probably be more entertained and, if you're not, you can only blame your little finger instead of the big bad Hollywood marketing machine.
I'd also like to suggest that on the next go 'round the Brothers Wachowski either cast a lead sexier than Natalie Portman or add enough action to the film so that it doesn't matter.