Our House

Rating: Null/10 (30 October 2019)

Us is basically about a fairly ordinary family confronted by clones of themselves who want to kill them and take over their house and possessions.
We meet to the Wilson family when they arrive at their beach house in Santa Cruz. Discussion at the table revolves around what the kids Zora and Jason are up to, and Mom (Adelaide) is surprised to hear that Zora's not interested in track and field anymore because she feels there's no point. Dad (Gabe) is prepared with the suggestion that getting to the Olympics is the point, and when Zora says she's not going to make it to the Olympics Adelaide says "You could do anything you set your mind to". It's usually not really true, but it's the kind of story we like to create for ourselves. And then cling to. Forever.
Jason has a 'magic trick' that basically looks like a lighter attached to a ring on his finger - it won't light. He says "This thing's kind of bulls-t" and Gabe and Adelaide are briefly upset with him that he cursed at the table (better in the living room? maybe it's all about location...). In response to their criticism, Jason says "When you point a finger at someone else, you have three pointing back at you", and points his hand like a gun at his father. Gabe acts appalled momentarily and says "What is that supposed to mean?" But then, it's not really important. Gabe 'corrects' Jason, saying it's four fingers, not three. It's all about technique, really.
In the car on the way to the beach, Zora says with conviction that there's fluoride in the water that the government uses to control people's minds. Evidently paranoid doomsday theories are something she's been interested in talking about (while doing internet 'research' on her phone), so everyone just goes silent and intentionally ignores her. Jason continually tries to light his 'magic trick' lighter and Zora suggests that maybe he could just say what's supposed to happen so everyone could picture it. Jason says "Maybe you could kiss my anus, Zora" and everyone is HORRIFICALLY APPALLED at his use of the word "anus". It's so much worse than the curse word which refers to the same thing you could picture in your mind. Except that people don't generally picture in their mind what they're saying when they say the curse word. It's so commonly used that it doesn't even seem crass to people anymore; it's just a syllable, so even if a kid uses it it's not the end of the world.
To change the mood in the car, Adelaide turns on the radio and "I Got 5 On It" by Luniz is playing. Gabe says it's a classic. Zora knows the song too, and when Jason asks what "I got 5 on it" means she says it's about drugs. Gabe is prepared to rapidly 'intervene' momentarily, saying "It's not about drugs - it's a dope song - don't do drugs." So dope is both good and bad at the same time in the same sentence about a song that Gabe says is great but probably shouldn't even be identified for what it is. But then, it's not really important. Gabe drops into the groove with some gangsta attitude as he sings along and Adelaide makes sure Jason gets in rhythm to the song under her guidance, snapping her fingers to the beat for him. It's really all about getting the attitude and the rhythm right.
The Wilsons meet their 'friends', the Tylers at the beach. The dads, Gabe and Josh talk about the boat Gabe just bought that Josh is quick to call a "dinghy" (sight unseen). Josh then rattles through a list of supplies Gabe should have gotten for the boat and is satisfied when he hits the missing item, a flare gun. It's official: Gabe is running to catch up and Josh has nice things.
Kitty's a heavy drinker who reads fashion magazines and tells her Forever Story about how she could have been a movie star. When she reveals that she had some cosmetic "work" done around her eyes Adelaide says "F- off..." (she's really just being 'friendly', you know). Kitty seems genuinely happy and comfortable, like this is the ice-breaker she was hoping for, and explains that the idea is to just do a tiny bit to keep looking the same, "Not that you need anything... wh-re" It's funny because it's so awkward when the word is fully pronounced like that; it's almost like she meant it. Maybe she should have used "ho", which means the same thing and which she also could have meant on some level. At least that way there would be fewer letters in the word, which is so much better.
Back home, Adelaide tidies up as Gabe watches baseball highlights and broods over the nice new car Josh bought. He says he'll see Adelaide later in the "magic room". Later in the evening, Gabe strikes a come-hither pose in the bedroom; he is prepared for sex. Unfortunately, Adelaide is brooding over a traumatic incident from childhood when she went to the carnival at the beach and was accosted by her clone, and she says she wants to go. They're talking about it when the power goes out and they discover a family standing like stick figures in their driveway, holding hands and wearing ankle-length red overalls and ugly sandals. Gabe is unprepared for a home intrusion; he's injured by his clone and the clones Get In.
The clones are lethal degenerates who are only capable of an extreme and unattractive version of the originals' tendencies at any given time. They communicate primitively - with clicks, grunts, and bellows more than words, and Adelaide's clone, Red appears to be the leader. Red tells her Forever Persecution Story and describes the rest of her family by their deficiencies. They all carry shears for the task of cutting themselves away from the originals (by killing them) so they can take over their home and have the good life. They clearly won't know what to do with the good life if they get it, though... At best they'll be surrounded by things they don't really know how to appreciate or maintain, the house will be filthy, and their social lives will be shallow and peculiar. With no sustainable lifestyle, no regular income, and no ability to navigate in the civilized world they'll eventually be arrested for tax evasion if not greater crimes.
After several skirmishes with the clones, Gabe's clone is dead and Gabe is limping. The Wilsons regroup and head to the Tylers' place by boat. But the Tylers have clones, too. After a night of heavy drinking, Kitty and Josh are quick to curse at each other and slow to respond to the home intrusion. Josh and the girls are swiftly killed to the sound of the Beach Boys playing in the background. Her throat half-cut now, Kitty drags herself miserably in a bloody smear along the floor. Josh's clone steps in her path and offers his hand to assist her then pulls it away (psych!), and runs it through his hair. It's funny because that's probably the kind of stupid jerk thing that Josh did when he was a kid, so he's retarded. Retarded Funny. Looking up at Josh's clone, Kitty says "Please stop" but then Ophelia (an alter-ego version of Alexa) responds "Stopping 'Good Vibrations' by the Beach Boys" and the music simply stops. Desperately, Kitty gasps "Ophelia, call the police", but Ophelia misunderstands - she says "Sure. Playing 'F- Tha Police' by N.W.A" and the track starts playing as Kitty's clone finishes cutting her throat. It's funny because Ophelia had such a helpful and good-natured machine voice when she unhelpfully started that track. Or maybe it's funny because affluent white people wouldn't have N.W.A loaded in their music player to begin with. Or maybe it's funny because she was suffering and wanted help but got N.W.A instead. Or maybe it's just funny because we never really liked her. Funny, funny, funny, funny...
When they arrive, the Wilsons are confronted by the Tylers' clones, and Gabe kills the Josh clone outside in a boat. Adelaide is tied up by the Kitty clone so Zora has to brutally bash the Tyler girls with a golf club to the sound of the N.W.A track, and Jason has to kill the Kitty clone by bashing her over the head with a table ornament. The Wilsons turn on the news and see that there's a society-wide hostile takeover by clones. One argument and a couple Home Alone references later, they're headed to Mexico (in the Tylers' nice new car). It's funny when they factor in kill count while determining who gets to drive. Zora ends up driving briefly and she kills her own clone with the car.
Driving along the coastline, they reach the Santa Cruz beach where the Jason clone has rigged an explosive roadblock. Jason kills him in a fire and is kidnapped by Adelaide's clone, Red. Adelaide goes in pursuit and ends up facing Red in a facility located below some underground tunnels. Above ground, Gabe and Zora see a long line of clones standing side-by-side, silently holding hands. Gabe says "What is that, some kind of f-ed up performance art?" Zora rolls her eyes. Funny...
Red has an unduly grand self-image and proselytizes insane notions while making stick figure cut-outs. She tells her Forever Abandoned Story about how the clones were created only to be deserted when the project failed; left to go insane. She then transitions to her Forever Martyr Story about a single 'dance' recital she gave in which she flailed and contorted bizarrely, now collectively accepted as a 'pivotal' event that the clones cling to pathetically as evidence of her superiority among derelicts. (She's probably right though when she says they're human too) Adelaide flails in a violent dance with Red before finally getting the upper hand and choking her to death, then she rescues Jason from a locker he was trapped in.
The film ends with the Minnie Riperton R&B song "Les Fleurs": "Inside every man / Lives the seed of a flower / If he looks within / He finds beauty and power". As the Wilsons drive away in an ambulance, helicopters hover over a chain of fools standing hand-in-hand in a demonstration about how if we're not willing or prepared to clean up our own house, it'll be overrun by lesser versions of ourselves who then spread across the countryside like a virus.