Another mega-stinker from an award-winning "film-maker"... who doesn't even have a grasp of the basics.

Rating: Null/10 (1 December 2019)

Starts off promisingly, with a decent enough premise for a mindless horror flick, but after the fairly "normal" first half-hour this cinematic roasted turkey just kept disintegrating, deflating, dumbing down, stupidifying, cretenizing.
In short, a typical airhead thriller - about violent kumbaya zombies holding Hands Across America. No joke. But considering the man who wrote/directed this dross, nothing should surprise us.
Yes, us. The victims of this monumentally idiotic movie. Us. The movie is - very mockingly - dedicated to its victimized viewers. It's about us and our patience. And our stupidity for wasting two hours on horsemanure.
I had no clue this was made by the rank amateur slash infamous ray-cist who created "Get Out", that awful white-guilt-financed/fueled Hollywood-darling (nuclear) bomb, otherwise I would have stayed away, very far, from this garbage. In fact, considering the damaged entity which made it, this is a refreshing improvement! Johnny is now officially a 1/10-level director, no longer a mere 0/10. At this rate, he should make a mediocre movie in about a decade. Fingers crossed.
Despite its supernatural theme, this starts playing out like a stereotypical idiotic home invasion flick as soon as the evil doubles move into action. Things get decidedly dumb from there, and I mean dumb. Nothing here makes sense. And then, just as you think it can't get any worse, it turns into a comedy. Out of the blue. Not even a funny comedy, but a cheap sit-com.
And then, eventually, the movie abandons comedy and goes back to "seriovs bvsiness" by giving us a moonwalking clone... which is technically speaking still comedy, but comedy of the unintentional variety.
Many whys here, extremely few becauses.
1. Why is Adelaide meeting her evil twin connected to other evil twins showing up in other households? Shouldn't this horror be reserved just for her? How the hell does her meeting a twin trigger a pandemic of evil twins? Is Adelaide the Spartacus of underground bunker clones? Why do evil twins wait for decades to finally start a "revolution"? Are they so thick it took them that long to realize that they could leave their tunnels by simply moving upwards?
2. Why do the white-family evil twins immediately kill their originals, whereas Adelaide's parallel family takes things very slowly? If anything, shouldn't it be the opposite: doesn't the real-Adelaide-turned-zombie have EXTRA motive to take revenge on her evil nemesis by being quick and brutal? (Instead, she is used as cheesy B-movie-level exposition...)
3. Why does the white woman's twin not kill Adelaide? She ties her to a bed instead. Did the director tell her not to kill her because that would prevent that amazingly dumb switcheroo end-twist?
4. Why must we be tortured with rap music? Isn't the idiotic plot torturous enough?
5. Where did the government get the funding to build tunnels for millions of useless clones? It's Jimmy Carter, isn't it?
6. Are evil twins born out of our poops? The movie said they were coming out of sewers.
7. Why is the average rating for this movie so ridiculously high when negative reviews rule the "helpfulness" review option listing?
8. Why did this site allow fake reviews and concentrated hype to render averages of new movies almost entirely meaningless?
9. Why does the movie start off as a moody mystery but then degenerate into self-parody? "Don't tell me you just made a Home Alone reference..." - the line that completely sealed the movie's fate.
10. Why does the CNN cameraman just stand there while a maniac with a knife approaches to stab him?
11. Why does Adelaide's evil twin (who's actually the real Adelaide) say "we're Americans"? What kind of idiotic answer is that? Is the film-maker trying to make some vapid "grand" social/political statement through this ridiculous zombie film - as he so spectacularly failed at in his previous awful movie?
12. Why are all evil twins born with the skills of highly-skilled ninjas? Were they bred to control their originals - or to beat the crap out of them?
13. Why does Adelaide's evil twin talk and reason like a class-conscious loser jealous of people who have more? "While you got all the soft toys, I got sharp ones that hurt me." Are the parallel demons Commies then? Why are tunnel toys sharp?
14. Why does this horror thriller run almost 120 minutes?
15. Why don't some film-makers know the basics of film-making - which includes the knowledge that horror films should never be two hours long? (Unless you're Kubrick.)
16. How is it possible that a family undergoing an extremely traumatic experience can start making jokes as if they're suddenly in a sitcom? "Hey, I killed two, also!"
17. How is it possible that people who finish film school actually think they can casually genre-hop within one movie?
18. Why is it that Adelaide's son's twin imitates his movements in that bloody silly car-explosion scene? So are the demons slaves to the originals or not! Or is the director telling us that the evil kid is so thick he doesn't realize there's a fire behind him?
19. Why do IMDb bots have nothing better to do than help hype bad movies by posting fake reviews and swarm-voting?
20. Why do thick film-makers believe and hope they can get away with an explanation as dumb as the "government created 100 million underground clones with which to control the humans above" malarkey?
21. Why would "the government" waste trillions of dollars on such an ultra-expensive and idiotic scheme - when they can much more easily and cheaply control the rabble through CNN's fake news and liberal-propaganda brainwashing at schools and America's Mickey Mouse universities?
22. Why did the dilettante director pick a word as moronic as "tethered"? Did he Google it a week before shooting started? Should Google delete this bloody stupid word from its computers so that bad directors can't find out about it hence annoy us with it in future clone flicks?
23. If the clones' purpose was only control of the originals, then why did they turn into kumbaya buffoons who are into Hands Across America nonsense?
24. If the real Adelaide came specifically for revenge (for the involuntary childhood switcheroo), then why didn't she say so at any point? She certainly wasted a lot of time on exposition, but failed to mention by far the most important thing...
25. If the real Adelaide was the killer all along, then how come the impostor Adelaide didn't have superior ninja skills compared to the real Adelaide who seemed as well versed in ninja-ing as the other clones? Why didn't fake Adelaide have any ninja skills? Is it because Ninja Courses start only after the age of 10 in the tunnels?
26. The millions of clones were "abandoned", and yet they survived: how? Did they go to evil-twin copies of Wal-Mart to shop? Did they butcher bunnies?
27. Why did the real Adelaide lose her voice in the bunkers? Was she singing Slayer songs a lot?
28. How come this ray-cist director didn't make a movie as bad as "Get Out"? Why aren't white people the bad guys again?
29. Since when was 70s technology even remotely close to being able to clone chickens, let alone humans? What kind of a moron sets up a secret government cloning program that is based in the 70s, or maybe even earlier? (It is never hinted when the cloning started...)
30. What kind of deluded, confused writer-director sets up a finale battle in which the protagonist fights a DANCING, moonwalking antagonist? Why didn't he just add a laugh-track?
31. Why didn't the real Adelaide simply SAY that she was replaced, explaining that this is what fuels her revenge? I mean, aside from the fact that it would spoil the idiotic plot-twist that comes 90 minutes later...
32. Why does the imposter Adelaide behave as if she were the real Adelaide?
Actually, I know the answer to this one: she is a walking talking plot-device, not a real person. Neither Adelaide is real. No character in this movie is real: not the clones, nor the originals. They are all asinine jokes created in an extremely shoddy child-like screenplay written by a hugely untalented, lazy hack.
Let's summarize... The government was incapable of using the clones as telepaths - yet they created an army of super-strong ninja warriors... then let them rot underground instead of use them for fighting wars...? (Doesn't Unhollywood keep telling us that the "evil military" is always seeking for new weapons? Here's one, yet it's left abandoned! With these ninja warriors the US would have even won the war in Afghanistan.)
If this director had any sense he'd have set this plot in the future - not the past - and he would have devised a military conspiracy involving using clones for wars, instead of to control America's obedient sheep. The left-wing media already does that successfully enough, without the help of clones!
This is doubtlessly one of the dumbest movies in recent years. Its utter disregard for logic and common sense, and its schizophrenic genre-hopping, make it unique. If Ed Wood had been cloned 50 years ago (or much more likely 50 years from now) by the military, and experimented on with LSD in secret underground government bunkers, then given a camera - he would have made a movie like this.