UnderDone

Rating: 2/10 (17 April 2006)

I blame the Wachowski Brothers. Ever since The Matrix re-awakened male interest in good-looking, gun-toting laydeez in skin-tight outfits, there's been a stampede of producers looking for a viable geek-porn franchise.
Underworld is one of many sub-Matrix beasts. Kate Beckinsale's Selene dresses in Trinity's black latex cast-offs and uses guns for every conceivable purpose apart from brushing her teeth. The 'Secret War, Searching for The Chosen One' plot ticks a few more Matrix boxes and things are rounded off by some gravity-defying stunts.
I have to admit that Selene's casual leap off a 100ft ledge, landing like a cat and calmly strolling away is a nicely-executed piece of stunt work, but there isn't much else to recommend this movie.
Um, apart from the Lycans. The werewolf makeup is fantastic and the effects really bring these mythical creatures to life.
But now, the downside. Kate Beckinsale is beautiful to look at but she is in a state of perma-sulk all the way through Underworld. One day she'll wake up, look back on her movie career and realise that she never acted at all. Admittedly, there isn't much call for serious dramatic acting in a film like Underworld, but that doesn't stop veteran actor Bill Nighy from giving it a go. Bill and Kate are polar opposites in this movie. Nighy manages to present Viktor as a multi-faceted character, so there's a real sense of drama when it's revealed that he's not as honourable and charitable as you first thought. Beckinsale's Selene just pouts and poses her way through the script, woodenly unconvincing and about as sexy as an action figure of herself.
Miss Beckinsale is not alone. Scott Speedman, the token American, matches our Kate splinter-for-splinter in the wooden department. Wearing a stock 'Confused' mask for most of the movie, he has all the screen presence and charisma of a wardrobe. At the end of the movie his character is transformed into some sort of uber-vampire-werewolf hybrid, but he still fails to raise any hackles and is acted off the screen by Bill Nighy.
I really wanted to like this film, but the sort-of-intriguing plot ended up being subsumed by poor acting and an over-abundance of gun play and dodgy martial arts. Apaarently there's a sequel - that'll be staying on the shelf at Blockbuster the next time I pay a visit.