Book pages omitted - but, gosh - this is a MOVIE!

Rating: Null/10 (11 October 2009)

Lots of reviews here and elsewhere lament the missing pages, or changed plot. Well, if this were Lord of the Rings, they might have a point. But Signs, or Twilight? Maybe even the Time-Travelers Wife (or life? or whatever). There are some well-reviewed novels that make it to film. But . . Twilight? So for films like this I say - the book, who cares about the book? The missing pages . . nobody ever read them to begin with. The changed plot . . what plot, except that one sees on screen. I think that's being more than fair. THERE IS NO BOOK! never was - least not for this kind of book.
Then to take the film for what it is, for what's on screen, I DO agree with many reviews posting here. These aren't vampires. They are something with super-hero strength and the ability to leap (which I thought was the werewolf thing, or the wire-fu thing), who don't age (like Dorian Gray), but who aren't affected by sunlight and who don't really get evil vampire Nosferatu faces or really big teeth. But they do suck necks.
The plot is about a young-leading-effeminate man o the 21st century, I suppose, who is a super-hero vampire and has some school chums and others who are, as well. He saves the life of a girl at school - with his super-hero skills. She's surprised, wants to know more, and . . well, she's just so purty that the fact she's a bimbo and airhead, otherwise, is of apparently no concern.
So they all go play baseball in the middle of nowhere, at dusk. And out of the trees off in the distance comes this trio of growed-up vampires. One is a real freak who sniffs out the airhead and says - hey, that's a snack. Me wants! But the 21st-century man says, she's mine, and this is ours, and you gots to go. So the freak chases him and airhead as they try to escape in their pickup or SUV, I forget.
That is, 21st and airhead decide to make a run. But first thing freak does is go to Mom's house. He picks up on airhead's cell after she had been talking to Mom. We naturally assume Mom is dead. Next up would be Dad. But apparently freak vampire never makes it that far. He tells airhead, get away from doze guys and meet me in an abandoned school you attended as a kid. Mom lives if you do. She says basically, oh thank you Mr. Psycho vampire killer for being so honest and oh, heck yeahs, I'll meet you in an abandoned building at night just as quick as I can, just you betcha.
So she gets beat up, and as freak is about to do her in then 21st century come crashing in and picks a fight. Some of the others of his gang show up. Airhead is all bloodied and near death - or 'the turn' - so much so that one of the girl 'vampires' can barely contain her 'hunger'. Needlesstosay, they take out freak, burn up his corpse in a corner, and airhead is next seen in the hospital.
They conclude this - movie - by 21st and airhead going to the prom. And the final scene has an ally of freak in an upstairs window looking down on the happy couple - just you wait (for the sequel?).
This film was apparently a big hit with the 'tweens'. A sad commentary on adolescent tastes heading toward 2010. It's not even so much the idea of 'good vampirism', which is frightening enough. Even Mr. 21st-century has to refer to himself as a 'monster' at the very end, just to remind the audience what part he's supposed to be playing. What's worse is just the stupidity of the heroine. She IS the girl who falls on the path as the villain is giving chase. She IS the one to walk alone upstairs and slowly turns the knob on the closed door. She's the one making the long-winded speech out in the open with the killer monsters closing in. And so on. And in those films, you tend to root against that stupidity. And that's the catch. It brings that out, intentionally, in the audience - rooting for a character to be brutally murdered. And it's not a good thing.