I hate Smeyer for even starting this whole Twilight nonsense.

Rating: 2/10 (20 December 2009)

Twilight: The story of a (boring) girl who moves in with her dad in a small town and falls in love with a (pompous) vampire, obviously causing complications.
For starters, this movie was awful, on almost every aspect. Before you say "Oh, but it's meant for tween- and teen-girls", know that I happen to be a 13 year old girl, and I'm not just saying the following because I want to be different. It's my honest opinion, so here goes: I hated Bella and Edward. I kept on hoping she was going to die at the end (though I knew she wasn't; I read the book) because she is such a horrible character, in that she teaches us that true love is based on NOTHING but good looks and is just such an ungrateful character. Edward is even more hate-worthy because he is just plain creepy (A 107-year-old man spying on a 17-year-old even when she sleeps?) and incredibly controlling.
The acting was horrible. I don't know who the acting coach was but I hope they get fired. Nobody in the entire film (Jacob, Bella's Mother, Eric and The Annoying Jessica excluded) showed any emotion. KStewart had the exact same blank expression on her face throughout the whole film, even when she was writhing like a bug when bitten. R-Patz had this weird pained-but-not-really expression which was incredibly annoying. And everyone else sounded like they were reading something out loud half-heartedly. The bad acting completely distracts one from the plot, which was silly and slow and boring. Smeyer obviously just threw in the bad vampires because she realised that without them the story lacks suspense and substance (which it still lacks).
The special effects were laughable. I cringed when the evil vampires attacked the fisherman, not because the scene was scary but because the effects were BAD. And don't even get me started on Edward's glittery skin, which was a silly thing to begin with and made him look like he was made of bubbly wax.
What also annoyed me was the amount of hype around this film. When I finished watching this film, I was like, "That's it?" (even though I read the book). It wasn't epic or funny or even remotely entertaining, so it doesn't really have "EPIC CULT PHENOMENON" plastered all over it. It's obvious that the only thing that made this film so massively popular was Edward, which doesn't even make sense since there are loads of hotter guys.
The forest scenery was really pretty, but not pretty enough to compensate for this sorely lacking film. And the other high point is that it follows the book pretty closely. However the book sucked, and the film sucked.