A True Romance From The World's Blackest Heart

Rating: 2/10 (26 June 2013)

Even though he didn't direct it (but he did write the script), True Romance had Quentin Tarantino's trademark stink smeared all over it.
Predictably fortified by one gory, Rambo-style killing after another (like, would you really have bothered to watch this film if this wasn't the case?), True Romance (a mighty grim, grimy, bleak tale of crime that's as old as bones) was your typical Tarantino trash.
Filled to over-flowing with endless Tarantino-type dialog (generously punctuated, for good measure, by the all-mighty F-word), True Romance's endless array of quirky characters (that even included a trailer-trash slut with a heart of gold) babble a blue streak, but, typically end up saying nothing in the least bit worthwhile.
I mean, for all of the jabber that goes on, True Romance doesn't contain one single quotable or memorable line in its entire 2-hour running time.
From Detroit to L.A., our delusional hero, Clarence (who justifies murder because Elvis Presley told him to do it) and his blushing bride, the flaky floozy, Alabama, are on the lam and being hotly pursued by cops and criminals, alike. It's the suitcase full of cocaine that everyone's after and, like, who gives a bloody damn how many people have to die for somebody, anybody, to get their greedy mitts on this jackpot.
Some people tend to put the blame for True Romance's considerable shortcomings squarely onto the shoulders of its director, Tony Scott (Ridley's bro'). But, personally, I think that Scott (who has clearly proved his competent directorial abilities, time and again) could only do what he could do, considering the dismal source of the inferior script that he was expected to work with in order to make something entertaining out of it.